V E R A ☆ L Y C A O N

b e w a r e s h e w h o s t a l k s t h e n i g h t (32 | transfemme | she/her)

[kingjaffejoffer]

Soccer Dad Gettin His

[rxvhh]

Turn up at the Hyundai dealership 

[mousidy]

jax died before she could come out, and she died before she could become a better person and make any kind of amends with the people she hurt. I don't think the story was written that way by accident

[mousidy]

she's horribly repressed and comes from horrible circumstances including homelessness. she also pushed away every hand extended to her and every chance she could have taken to get better. there were a million better decisions she could have made and she did not make them, and she caused an incredible amount of harm along the way. and still the story wants us to believe her worthy of being understood and loved

[mousidy]

to come out would be to embody herself, to view herself as a real person, to start to leave the haze of dissociation that allows her to think of herself and everyone else as cartoon archetypes in a false world where nothing matters

she's desperate to stay in this world that she sees as false, where she's a funny cartoon character and she can still brush off the pain she causes as silly cartoon antics

it's exactly this dissociation that allows her not to take her own pain or the pain of others seriously. it was what ultimately led to her death. a jax that cannot come out is also a jax that cannot make amends

[mousidy]

something I love about a tragic story, where a character fails to complete the arc that might have satisfied us as the audience, is that it asks us what led to the tragedy

the despair it leaves us with, the satisfaction it denies us, leaves us to yearn for things to have turned out differently. it leaves us thinking about what could have been done, what decisions could have been made, what different circumstances could have prevented the tragedy? dissatisfaction drives us to act

you're not supposed to be satisfied when she dies

[mousidy]

I love, by the way, the matter-of-fact cut from her walking away to her already being gone. like many tragedies we experience in our lives, the news comes to us unceremoniously, undramatically, flatly. it arrives well after the moment where we could have been there. in one quiet moment the world shifts underneath our feet. at first it feels like nothing at all until the information percolates through us, manifesting first as a dull ache that feels inadequately small and insignificant

we don't get to ask "what could I have done if I were there," we can only ask "what could I have done before it got this bad?"

[mousidy]

when a trans woman in your life commits suicide, she is not going to have tied up all the loose ends first. a trans woman's suicide is not the last page of a full life well lived. it is an abrupt end in the middle of a story that deserved to keep going

[mousidy]

people who survive their lowest moments are the ones who get a chance to grow and make amends. far, far too many trans women do not survive

[what-even-is-thiss]

I still find it pretty funny that in fallout 3 you can get your karma down by just opening Moriarty’s terminal over and over again.

The slavers at paradise falls have heard of me. I’m the guy that opens people’s computers over and over again without asking first.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Butch won’t be my companion. He’s like you’re too intense. You must’ve turned on that computer like 50 times in a row last time.

[what-even-is-thiss]

My forbidden computer touching ways have caught up with me.

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason I’m doing this in the first place is that a lot of evil karma options in fallout 3 are just inconvenient. Like I could go out of my way to blow up a city or I could not blow up a city and get a much more convenient free house and keep access to their merchants.

So in order to keep getting the full evil karma experience, every time I do something convenient or utilitarian that raises my karma I go back to Moriarty’s Saloon and just open his terminal over and over again.

Thus, my good boy points are eliminated through repeated computer touching and the regulators here are hunting me down for looking at Moriarty’s personal data a hundred times in a row.

[what-even-is-thiss]

What’s really funny about lowering your karma this way is that after you do a major good Karma action and listen to the radio, the radio DJ Three Dog will be like this horrible fucker from vault 101 we all hate him so much you know that guy? He did another fucking thing. He saved a thousand orphans.

[agaywolf]

[milf-adjacent]

I thlammed my penith in the car door

[innerchildabortionclinic]

oh fuckkkk man not the SERIAL UNALIVER

[rustmarty]

[memewhore]

[2urban2fantasy-deactivated20241]

Woman murders man in broad daylight

[theknightinslippers]

[halorvic]

[no-one-offical]

‎

[crypticgoose3]

beautiful like to reblog ratio on this

[drtanner]

That's because people are reblogging it every time they see it. Like I'm doing right now lmao

[kusali]

Lmaoo

[squaresquid]

[esoanem]

[lindsaychrist]

new covergirl wtesilkcsk freiusit sprisizdters

[tragbarerpanzrabwehrkomplexfagot]

[dogpuppy]

[termina-festival]

t'es woke toi🫵 toi t'es un WOKE LEFT😡 tu supporte les TRANS pis les pronoms toi🏳️‍⚧️ veux-tu savoir mes pronoms? mes pronoms? ☝️qué/bec⚜️ ☝️fran/çais🇫🇷 ☝️bar/be/cue🔥 ☝️go/habs/go🏒

💙bleu pis rose🩷 toi c'est quoi tes pronoms hein?🤨 vas-y. dis moj tes pronoms🫵 👴joe/bi/den?🇺🇸 💅ru/paul?🏳️‍🌈 j'vas prier pour tois🙏

[powerburial]

[sour-charity]

ummm.no

[jingerpi]

imagine you're a child, you learn your queer and your parents are extremely bigoted. you have some friends on Roblox who are very kind, they're in their early 20s and they sympathize as they went through the same things as a kid. they offer to use your correct name and pronouns, maybe some even offer to buy you a binder or help you find hrt or support groups local to you

roblox rolls out their age group system, and you can no longer talk to any adults on the platform. you can only talk to people in person, i.e. your parents, who are horrid. now you're back at square one, being helplessly abused. to make it worse, you're homeschooled, as I was. you can't reach out to anyone at school for support either.

or maybe you're not homeschooled, and you ask your pronouns to be used at school. it goes well for a while, and you feel some relief.

then your state passes a bill that requires forced outing. your teachers report to your parents that you've been trying out a different name and pronouns.

they pull you from school, send you to boarding school or conversion therapy, and force you to attend private schools in the future that match their values.

you are entirely under their control. you could've made connections with other adults, ones willing to help you out. to treat you like a human, give you access to life saving care. and it's stripped away, you're alone, and everything feels hopeless.

this is the reality for many children. this is almost exactly what I went through as a child. it is not a mere hypothetical, it happens regularly. please stop falling for this moral grandstanding, it's about control- it's always been about control.

[miiilowo]

having anti role models is a beautiful thing. it's not easy to live up to someone else's behavior but it is easy to lasso yourself into behaving right when you realize you're reminding yourself of the worst person youve ever met in your entire life

[bathroomcube]

back from the hospital

[bathroomcube]

only reason im telling you this is because on the wristband they gave me they had a pronouns section but instead of just putting down my pronouns there was a barcode you could scan

its just a very funny visual. probably real as fuck for some of you