how vexing!

they/them || aroace nonbinary lesbian || disabled || chinese american

[vexangle]

university kicking my ass Sorry Readers catch ya later

[annabelle--cane]

[scrolling through a fandom tag] wrong. wrong. incomprehensibly wrong. wrong but harmless. nice style and color palette but I don't care about that ship. mildly entertaining liveblog update. they whitewashed my girl :( . good joke, reblog. wro--well that's my mutual so I will politely look away. fifteen posts in a row by an innocent rp blog that I don't have the heart to block. take I agree with but op was annoying about it. chapter twenty-eight of a longfic wip. !! GOOD POST !!, instafollowed. bot. technically correctly tagged but uses this acronym for something completely different. museum worthy art piece by a sixteen-year-old from the philippines. wrong. wrong but in a new and exciting way that provokes thought.

[catboybiologist]

After some years of HRT I've been left with this deep, low simmering rage. Because what do you mean it was always this easy to be happy

[catboybiologist]

I take a shot once a week, and even if that was too much, I could do it as pills, and so many of my problems just evaporated overnight.

And not one person thought to bring it up.

When I was talking about how horrifying puberty felt. When I was cutting myself. When I was in inpatient care. When I attempted suicide. When I talked for YEARS in therapy about how dissociated and trapped I felt in my body. When I felt like I never truly fixed something that was deeply wrong about me that started at puberty.

Not one person said it was a possibility. No one thought "hey, maybe this kid should go to someone trained to identify dysphoria". No one mentioned that trans people weren't some weird other group of people. It didn't have to be pressure. It didn't have to be "forcing" me. Just mentioning that trans people exist and it could be me. That it was possible and it was easy. No pushing, just laying the option out there.

HRT is treated like this last ditch option. This horrific, mutilating thing that I GUESS we can give to you if you have NO OTHER options. Because did you know it's permanent? Did you know you'll be on it for the rest of your life? Did you know the health risks? Did you know it'll make you infertile? Did you know that it's deviant? Did you know that it's an alternative lifestyle for other people?

No one said it was okay to WANT it to be permanent. Or noted that most people are reliant on the medical system in one way or the other anyways (and it's not even necessary for HRT). Or that the health risks are the normal parts of having that hormone, even in cis people of your gender. Or said it was okay to not want kids, or mention that you can just freeze gametes. Or acknowledged that the "deviant" people are just people, living their lives, that have been violently pushed out of "normal" society.

I grew up in an area that Republicans mock for being a kind of "woke central". And even then it's just. Not treated as an easy option. It was never on the table if you don't specifically already know you're going through gender stuff, and no one will help you get to that point. At which point, it's still treated like the last ditch option. Did you know you can be a feminine man? Did you know you can slap a "she/her" in your twitter bio and be done with it? Did you know that you're oh-so-valid without it? Did you know that you shouldn't take HRT? Maybe don't take HRT? Don't take HRT? Don't take HRT? Don't ta-

When you've been in it a while, HRT is the easiest, most casual thing in the world. Just pop a shot on a Saturday as part of your "everything shower" routine and you're done.

Anyways. Support trans kids always and forever.

[catboybiologist]

And if anyone comes swinging in here with "but Sierra you don't have to take HRT to be trans this is toxic" I'm going to fucking scream, because that is the status quo. "Just do this without doing this" has become a "give them an inch" refrain when making ourselves "acceptable" to the cis. Of COURSE you don't need to take HRT. I'm only reminded of it a dozen times a day.

[amazonclimber]

The maddening thing is that recognizing I’m trans wasn’t the thing that finally helped me. It’s the fucking estrogen. I went from feeling like an empty husk to an actual living person before my tits started coming in. I’d sooner give up my antidepressants, because they’re not as important to my mental health.

[feminist-space]

The above is a video shared by smrchildsadness on Twitter, showing a person participating in a pride parade exchanging a pride flag with a person standing on his (am using his pronoun based on the TikToks/Tweets of what happened) doorway who had a Portuguese flag. There are sounds of cheers and crying and the two people hug each other as they exchange the flags. The man at the doorway then waved kisses to the crowd within the pride parade.

The Tweet says: "NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HE WAS WAVING THE PORTUGUESE FLAG BECAUSE HE DIDN'T HAVE A PRIDE FLAG AND THEY TRADED FLAGS AND HE'S SO EMOTIONAL TO GET HIS OWN PRIDE FLAG I'M EMOTIONALLY RUINED"

For context, apparently they were worried that maybe he's a nationalist because he was waving the Portuguese flag and some nationalists opposing the pride march were waving that flag. But upon interacting with him, it turns out he didn't have have a pride flag and he wanted to wave *a* flag in support of the pride march. So they had an exchange and now he has his own pride flag 😭🥹.

The image above is a Tweet by kunwara_ladkaa that says "I'm crying so much right now (Image taken by Manuel Fernando Araújo/Lusa)". The image shows the same man from the pride parade crying as he hugs his new pride flag.

The above image is a Tweet by dudz_zZzz that says "ainda não parei de pensar nele," which according to Google translate from Portuguese to English is "I still haven't stopped thinking about him." The image is a drawing of the person from the pride parade, crying as he hugs his new pride flag.

Posts were made on July 1, 2024.

[feminist-space]

One of the most joyful moments of 2024 during a Pride Parade in Portugal.

[sportsnight-deactivated20201211]

[parkchanwoohoo]

[goldensunset]

when the characters never really make peace with it

[postguiltypleasures]

As someone currently watching both Widow’s Bay and Twin Peaks, I have been thinking, “What makes a USA based story feel like it is in the eastern or western half of the country?” And the best answer I can think is there’s a continuum: on the East Coast characters see the rules as set, but sometimes want to game them, and West Coast characters think there are no rules but the ones self assigned. When things go wrong for East Coast it’s “this is what happens when you don’t listen to the lessons of your forebears” and when they go wrong on the West Coast it’s “you are more alone than you can understand.” There is essentially a gradient of one to the other going across the continental US.

[phantomrose96]

I think it's funny world-building how like, so at the center of Life we've got Water. Arguably The most important resource. Colorless transparent substance that molds to any container and we die without it and quickly. And all organic functions of society hinge on its availability. Could fight a ton of wars over this thing.

And well beyond organic life, modern society's great human invention is the Electronic Magic. Our greatest minds invented the Electronic Magic and it sends information around the world instantly. Our infrastructure our economy our modern life, minute by minute by minute, hinges on utilizing the great Lighting Technology.

BUT ☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️ DO NOT. DO NOT EVER. get the magical Elixir Substance of Life and Living and Healing, Water, IN the Electronic Device. The water keeps you alive critically but it KILLS the Electronic Device instantly and catastrophically. This Says something.

[phantomrose96]

and this Says something...

[vexangle]

soooooo did the creator and/or cast of tadc ever actually apologize for their racist actions or...

[wutheringheightsfilm]

every day it just concerns me how little compassion people have. no compassion for those living in the global south. no compassion for immigrants. no compassion for disabled ppl. no compassion for addicts. no compassion for prisoners. no compassion for children. like holy shit ...

[wutheringheightsfilm]

i made a separate post about this but actually there are plenty of people cough white people who care about animals more than they ever do human people . not what i'm talking about make your own post

[nourishedbytime]

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

sorry to be a broken record every month but christ menstruation is a stupid concept. oooooh excuse me for not getting pregnant, why the fuck is there goo falling out of me about it? grow the fuck up and reabsorb that shit for nutrients.

[tagfer]

cell phone doesn't like water because it is a combination of the other three elements. it is a rock (earth) that we fill with lightning (fire) that can control radio waves (air). if it contained water too, it would be too perfect; it would be like a god. to prevent this, the universe kills the would be uniter-of-the-elements. it's basic science.

[heronbrew]

Hey op google what LCD stands for

[tagfer]

i took an oath in third grade to never do drugs

[lastoneout]

I do think it's helpful to remember that most of the USA is way hotter than Europe and that's part of why we like big bevvy so much. We aren't just hedonists, we're also too fucking hot!!

[thearcade945]

(disclaimer that this post looks like it has History behind it [by which i mean i assume a previous post prompted it] but we haven't seen any context if it exists, sorry if i miss the mark with my comment due to that)

no cause i speak as a european, big beverages started making SO much more sense now that like. well one, shit's getting warmer bc of climate change, and two, our own heat tolerance is getting worse, in no small part because of the meds we're on. and, honestly dude, even if it WAS just hedonism, i basically always end up wanting more beverage when i finish mine, even in large sizes, so like. i'm with y'all on this one, big beverages fuck

[lastoneout]

For real!! It's all "why do you need a drink that big" but when it's 95F/35C and cloudless sometimes you just gotta replace your blood with two liters of cherry coke.

[lastoneout]

Oh my god I figured it out. Europeans don't get this because their cities aren't usually car-centric in the way cities in the US and Canada(from what I've heard) are. All that extra asphalt with limited public transit and yes, naturally hotter weather all on it's own, and barely any safe places to walk or rest outside...yeah, we need big drinks guys. It's common fucking sense, you need a gallon of water a day when you're hiking here at the bare minimum, a 2 liter big gulp from Circle K could save your life. I've read too many stories of people dying from dehydration on hikes bcs they figured a liter of water would cover them for two days to pretend big bevvy isn't justified.

I honestly think a lot of the misunderstanding of why Americans are Like That from people in Europe comes down to North America being really fucking weird.

[multishipperpirateking]

America is really fucking weird you're so right - love the way you've paved over such a massive percentage of your heat-sink natural surfaces becuase of cars. Nobody's doing it like you. But at least you have large beverage

[lastoneout]

Most of us have reached a point where we're about one bad day away from ripping up the road in front of our house with a sledgehammer so the big bevvy really helps. Emotional regulation in the face of complete societal abandonment is hard but iced coffee? Yay <3 <3

(Though even without ass city planning and car supremacy and global warming some places in the US are just hot enough all on their own that you need big bevvy. No amount of good city planning is going to make it safe to spend a day out at 90F/30C without a big drink. It's always gonna be over 90F in Tucson in the summer. We just got a lot of heat over here, not enough ocean to balance it out.)

[lastoneout]

Seen a few people make this point and I love the optimism but this would truly be a nightmarishly bad idea. Funny, but extremely bad. Mostly for the same reason people climbing Everest and mountains like that have to wear sunglasses and sunscreen on any exposed skin despite being in some of the coldest climates in the world, white reflects UV radiation. Everyone would be going snowblind all the time, and it would also probably be a lot harder to make out what color the lines are and read street signs. Black makes more sense, but what makes even MORE sense is getting rid of the fucking roads and building trolleys and other forms of public transit that don't need black asphalt under them.

Interestingly tho, this is why it's really common for houses in the desert parts of Arizona to have white roofs.

[insanepixels]

There ARE solutions to dealing with high temperatures caused by urbanization (that isn't tearing up asphalt, much as I would also like to do that). For example:

Urban/suburban vegetation: any amount of vegetation can aid in lowering the temperature by increasing evapotranspiration rates, especially trees which also provides a canopy, creating shaded areas

Shaded sidewalks/benches: we can't realistically shade the entire sidewalk, both because of scale issues and also sunlight is, in moderation, good for you, but having shaded areas, especially where rest amenities are like benches, can go a long way into making cities/suburbs more accessible in the heat

Shaded parking lots: I haven't seen an example of this irl but I know there's parking lots where the majority of it is shaded using solar panels, which is really just beautifully efficient

Underground paths/walkways: Toronto, for example, has a system of underground tunnels (imaginatively named PATH) which spans about 30 km and connects various office buildings, restaurants, etc. This helps pedestrians avoid the heat AND the cold in the winter, AND rain/inclement weather!

Non-reflective glass: less relevant for suburbs, but non-reflective glass absorbs solar radiation rather than reflecting it towards street level, which helps tremendously in keeping cities with lots of tall glass buildings cool. It does require more cooling within the building to balance it out, though, so it's not a perfect solution

Lots of other solutions like green roofs/walls, designing cities to allow airflow, dedicated vegetated areas/water features within cities (parks), permeable pavements, reflective roofs (as previously mentioned in this post)

The important thing to note is that these solutions are rarely, if ever, universally applicable, but the flip side of that is that at least some of these WILL be applicable no matter where you live, so it's a matter of figuring out which ones work and which don't.

The other important thing to note is that by no means are any of these a replacement for the Big Beverage. No amount of shade will save you from dehydration, it just means that hopefully you take longer to get to that point. The recommended daily intake of water for a person is like... 2 litres. That's a lot of water so you gotta get started. Always Be Hydrating.

[lastoneout]

The fact that every single parking lot and bus stop in my city isn't shaded by solar panels is a fucking crime. 365 days of bright ass sun, as far as I'm concerned the city should mandate it, parking lot hits a certain size threshold and it needs solar shaders. It would spare the places with lots way too small for them and for tiny stores that can't afford them, though I also think the city should just pay for it then. The usless cops have enough money, take it from them. It makes 100% perfect sense in every way and would basically eliminate the surrounding buisnesses' power bills but I guess spending money to spend less to no money is bad somehow. And the city doesn't force it.

Tucson could do a lot better in terms of shade, there are so many stretches of road with no plants or sidewalks or shade at all for miles sometimes. Outside of specific areas you can approach traveling here by foot as closer to hiking than walking. You need TONS of water, sunscreen, clothes that cover your skin, a hat, and ideally something to restore electrolytes. It's why one of the most popular local food chains sells these giant fuck off slushies for like $3.

Also to sell the importance or bevvy to the Europeans, in AZ at least there are laws stating that all buisnesses that serve food have to offer free water to anyone who asks regardless of if they're a customer or not. So people don't die because people die if you don't make that a law. That's the importance of bevvy here, it's genuinely life or death.

I also find people really overestimate their heat tolerance and it's why so many people die hiking here. You assume someone saying you need a gallon of water a day is being silly bcs people really only need 2 liters but no, once it's in the 90/40s and above you need more water especially if you're doing anything physical, you will be sweating buckets even in the shade and a gallon a day is the bare minimum. If you don't have enough water you get a heat stroke and if you're lucky get found fast enough you get to spend the day in the American ER getting pumped full of fluids. If you aren't lucky you die. There's a reason Trump not shading the line into his stupid rally ended with like 10 people having to go to the hospital with heat stroke. They're lucky no one died.

We should also have underground paths. I think the university has them but the rest of the city doesn't, they would really help, hell Tucson building a full subway would make everything easier and better but the construction would be insane and take like a decade probably. Still worth it, and better than the damn trolley that only goes to the rich parts of downtown and the university.

But yeah, curbing urban heat is important, but it will not save you from needing Large Beverage, especially in the desert.

[beemovieerotica]

dystopia

[the-breadgirl]

???

[tyrantisterror]

I was a really soft-hearted little kid who cried a lot and liked to play games about making big families and nurturing things, which, since I was a boy, meant I got the shit kicked out of me a lot by other boys for being girly. Boys were supposed to be tough and fight and compete and try to be the best, you see, that's how our imagination games were supposed to go. And that's what media aimed at boys when I was a kid focused on - heroes who beat the shit out of people and are tough and don't cry et cetera et cetera.

And I learned to like that and see the appeal in that, sure. There are lots of stories that were made for an audience of little boys that I ended up liking. But I always wanted something that told me boys like me, who didn't want to be violent or competitive, who liked nurturing things and making friends, who avoided fights whenever allowed, were valid.

So I was really happy when Steven Universe came around and was exactly that - the kind of show a sensitive little boy like I used to be would have killed to see. And very shortly after that I was crushed when the growing criticism of the show repeated the refrain that it was bad mainly because Steven was a pacifist who cried and didn't want to be violent and liked nurturing things and making friends instead of killing people. I wasn't surprised, no, it made perfect sense people would hate it for being that, but I was crushed all the same.

Our society only accepts a very narrow definition of masculinity, and kindness isn't allowed to play a very big role in it. That's one of the reasons I quit it.

Anyway, I'm a daycare teacher now, and one of the kids in my class is a really sensitive little boy with big feelings and a bigger heart, who acts very nurturing to his little 3-D printed dragons, and gets very upset at how mean and rude the other little boys can be when they're trying to prove they're mature and tough. Recently he's been talking to me about a show he found and has fallen in love with called Steven Universe, and I've been delighted to hear him regale me about how much he loves it. I bet it's doing him some real good to see that it's ok for a little boy like him to have a big heart and to want to make friends instead of fight all the time. He's making up his own crystal gem OC too, isn't that nice?

[glumshoe]

do not go to Dr. Kenneth Wolf for top surgery

[glumshoe]

I went to him because he was 1.) the cheapest possible option and since I needed crowdfunding that seemed best 2.) within driving distance of my friends who’d be able to host me. I didn’t have any complications and I don’t hate my results, so the fact that he stopped offering free revisions after COVID (including for people who had their surgeries before the pandemic) and ghosts everyone isn’t a huge deal personally. I do have moderate to severe dog-earring right in the middle my chest which limits what clothing I can wear and have inquired about possible revisions with other surgeons (so far no one has been willing to operate on other dr’s work and have told me I’d need to pay the price of a full secondary top surgery). Dr. Wolf famously ghosts all his patients after surgery and has strict weight limits.

HOWEVER I accompanied my friend to their top surgery at the University of Michigan last year that made Dr. Wolf’s entire process seem back alley and sketchy by comparison. My friend had extensive pre- and post-surgical monitoring and extreme sanitary precautions. Dr. Wolf just had me take off my shirt and slapped me on the operation table still wearing my street clothes and then scraped me up and sent me home the moment I regained consciousness. His bedside manner was offputting and uncomfortable. It has been impossible to contact him ever since, even to ask politely why my stitches look so different from his other results. Other people with much worse results have also been ghosted.

[glumshoe]

OH AND ALSO when I asked if he could swap my left and right nipples just for the hell of it he said “yeah sure lol” but apparently you’re not supposed to do that because there is the risk of like, manually metastasizing cancer cells. lol. I did ask for it and I think I am at very low risk for breast cancer but I do think a responsible surgeon should at least know about and warn you of that possibility before agreeing to it.

[glumshoe]

my friends and my ex were great caretakers who made the recovery process easy and kind of fun but knowing what I know now makes the whole experience retroactively a little bit traumatic

[faggotry-enjoyer]

An additional anecdote: My roommate got top surgery with this guy during our freshman year of college, and he had no family or other friends in the area to accompany him. On any normal day I would've skipped class to do so, but I had a quiz worth like a fifth of my grade and not enough advance warning to ask if I could take the alternate time (my roommate told me about this literally the morning of).

Dr. Wolf operated on an unaccompanied patient and let him get in a Lyft by himself immediately post-surgery.

A week or so he had to go back in to deal with a minor complication, and wanted to go by himself again. So I emailed Dr. Wolf to ask if I should push back and insist on coming with this time, and got this reply:

We always feel safer for the patient to have somebody with him. If it was the hospital, they would refuse to even do him without somebody with him.

I guess it technically beats operating on him alone a second time, but straight-up admitting that a hospital would never do the kind of thing he does is... telling, I think.

[glumshoe]

wow yeah I don’t love that

he seems to have been a lot more communicative in the past when he offered revisions but I don’t know if his other policies used to be better

also correction: there was a one week follow up appointment where he changed the bandages and told me it looked fine but there was no other communication after that. also he used penrose drains which I didn’t personally mind but was a lot grosser for my caretakers because it meant I was just oozing directly into my bandages, soaking through them, and staining clothes/bedding.