If I knew how to make comics, I would make one where Scott and Cleo are hanging out on Scott’s couch looking for something to put on TV while they paint each other’s nails, and they’re talking like
Cleo: Y’know, it’s not that I don’t love the boys anymore or even that I don’t care about Etho anymore. I just feel like I’m trapped in a life that I wasn’t really ready for when I chose it. I’m not even completely unhappy; I’m just kind of discontent with my own experience with the world.
Scott: I can understand that, I think.
Cleo: Yeah? You’re the one going off and having adventures with Martyn all of the time.
Scott: Yeah, but, I don’t know. I love Martyn. I do, but… I think I’m ready to settle down, now. I know it’s not the same kind of trap that you’re in or the same kind of experiences that you’re wanting to have, but I understand feeling like you’re only here because there isn’t a better option.
Cleo: Okay, fair. Yeah, I do get that.
And Scott and Cleo stare at the TV for a panel and then it shows that they’ve scrolled to a station broadcasting an episode of Wife Swap. Their eyes go big, and they turn to look at each other.
Cleo: We should…
Scott: …swap wives…
Cut to Cleo waiting at the window of their house as Martyn and Scott ride over on a motorcycle. Martyn looks uncertain but otherwise fine, and Scott looks completely normal. Cleo bounces up out of her seat, calls Etho over, and hands him some papers.
Etho: What’s this?
Cleo: Divorce papers. Also, I’m giving Scott my car.
Etho: What?!
Cleo, walking out the door with a backpack: Listen, it’s not that I don’t like you anymore, Etho, but I think we both know that we’re not in love anymore.
Etho: Wh- but- Cleo, you can’t just leave out of the blue! We should at least figure out what to do about the kids!
Cleo, fist-bumping Martyn as Scott removes his helmet: Oh, you have full custody.
Etho: WHAT
Cleo, gesturing to Scott and putting on Scott’s helmet while Scott approaches Etho: And this is child support.
Martyn and Cleo ride away, leaving Etho standing there in shock with Scott.
Scott: I’ll work, cook, clean, watch the boys, and take them to school if you let me stay in the guest bedroom. And the kids don’t have to call me “Mom” if they don’t want to.
Etho: …
Etho: Yeah, I guess. What about your stuff?
Scott: What’s mine is Cleo’s, and what’s Cleo’s is mine.
Two months later, Cleo comes back to check in on things, visit the kids, and hang out with Scott and
Cleo: Hey, how’s it goin-
Etho: YOU CAN’T RECLAIM CHILD SUPPORT. HE’S MINE, NOW.
Cleo: what
Scott: yeah I sleep in the master bedroom now. with Etho. sometimes we hold hands. also I’m “Mom”, now.
PEAK




















