😭 HER FACE OMG
I love her lmao

@theartofmadeline
Xuebing Du

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oozey mess
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

★
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
noise dept.
wallacepolsom

if i look back, i am lost
$LAYYYTER
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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One Nice Bug Per Day
YOU ARE THE REASON

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

izzy's playlists!
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

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@wehuntmonsters
😭 HER FACE OMG
I love her lmao
I think next thursday is gonna be the best day of my entire life tbh
reblog for next thursday to be the best day of your life
not risking it
Saw what I thought was a teenage sibling racing her younger siblings to their car after church. Turns out it was their mother and she threw her arms up and laughed at them when she beat them to the parking lot. Parenting sometimes looks like fun 😂
a running tally of adorable things my 20-something year old math prof has said
-“hold onto your hats, kids, we’re gonna do some algebra!!! ….what? that’s a saying! that people say!” -“you know, they used to call richmond ‘fist city’. why are you laughing” -“so, if you start your weekend with $250, and you end up sunday night with $10- stop laughing, you’re gonna understand adulthood soon enough.” -“no, i can’t put my age in the spreadsheet, it’s gonna fuck up the results because you’re aLL 18 and i’m OLD!” -“i’m sorry an old man yelled at you, but that happens in the city. you just gotta get used to old men saying mean things. they’re mean to me too.” -him: “okay kids, someone tell me a joke while i erase the board” me: “my life” him: “you think your life is a joke now? just wait ‘til you’re a grad student. god i’m sad.”
update: -“you think you guys have it hard ‘cause you have to do a page of math homework? i have 10 credits worth of classes, which is a FULL LOAD for a grad student, my teaching job, my OTHER job… i haven’t slept in so long. who has coffee. no, fuck red bull i don’t drink that shit unless i’m desperate” -“you know, space jam came on tv the other day. that’s one heck of a movie, kids” -him: “you guys can call me whatever you want, honestly, as long as it’s not old man” me: “who calls you that you’re like 25” him: “I FELL ASLEEP WATCHING ONE MOVIE OKAY. ONE.” -“i love my dog! he’s better than, well, most people actually” -“i’m not smart just because i can do complex math in my head! ….okay maybe i am but my point is you can too someday” -“you’re not bad at this just because you can’t figure out the problem! that’s why you’re in school. you gotta learn how to do it first! i believe in you!” -“are you telling me none of you full grown 90’s kids know how to use an excel spreadsheet??? i take it back i don’t know if i can do this anymore”
this got like 300+ notes in two days so here’s another update for y'all: -“stop putting yourself down! you can do math! it’s easy for me because it’s my career path. you can do it, i promise.” -him: “uh….. i really should’ve worked this problem out beforehand. i forget how to do it.” ta: “dude aren’t you learning theoretical math? this is ALGEBRA” him: “shhhhhhhhh” -“google maps should be able to tell you how many douchebags are on your route. yes, ellie, i remember every instance you’ve told me about.” -him: “try this problem out! it’s a pretty cool one, the answer took years to figure out.” me, twenty minutes later: “…..there’s no solution is there” him & his colleagues, cackling like gremlins: “NO!” me: “you let me STRUGGLE for that long????” them: “yeah it was really funny” -him: “you have FOUR SHOTS of caffeine in your coffee…. is your heart gonna explode” me: “actually, maybe, i forgot to take my heart meds this morning” him, doing a perfect impression of the caveman spongebob meme: “WHAT THE FU C K ELL IE”
another update for today -him: “so the variable is….” me: “i don’t…. know” him: “[strangled shrieking]” me: “you good?” him: “i am a hollowed out shell of a man” -me: “bruh” him: “don’t call me bruh” me: “sorry dude” him: “that’s better” -“you know those old 90’s karate movies with the sensei that’s a complete asshole? i’d like to be like that, but for math. the asshole math sensei. that’s me” -“i’m so old. do you even know what top gun is??? knowing space jam is one thing, but if you don’t know what top gun is i’m too old to be friends with you”
we’ve almost reached 2k… time for another update -me, getting my test back: “i hate myself” him: “wait til you hit your mid-twenties. then that self hatred will really start solidifying” -me: “so i /will/ pass out, but you don’t have to call an ambulance” him: “you’ve been in my class for an entire month ellie. why do you wait to tell me important things? i get memes in my email but i don’t get to know important health concerns.” -“apples are fun to throw at stop signs. what, i was young once” -“i had GREAT sleep last night. like, four entire hours. god it was wonderful” -him: “matrices really get me going” me: “uh, what?” him: “that means it makes you excited right?” me: “yes but probably not the way you wanted to mean”
Woah! We NEEEED that bookshelf! 😍 😍 😍
Couldn't sleep last night and my cucumbers and dill were going to go bad so I made spicy pickles. Adulthood is wild, y'all
Man okay when I got my wisdom teeth out it was a fucking experience. Before the surgery wasn’t too interesting but as soon as I woke up I saw the nurse next to me and was all like “hey… i think… i died… and now I’m in a parallel universe… and i gotta go back to my house and kill the me from this universe” and he was just kinda like “alright, you do that”. And then the other nurse kept going in and out of the room to get things and I thought there was like 5 of her that kept coming out of the room, and then so when she was wheeling me out in a wheelchair I was like “damn… why are there so many of you… there’s like 5 many of you” and she was just kinda like “alright, you do that”.
Anyway I got to the car and my dad was there and he was like “how ya feeling son” in the dadliest way possible and I was like “MAN I AM PUMPED LETS GET SOME JUICE I’M STARVED” so we drove about 3 blocks to a jamba juice, whereupon I say “I’m good I can do this” and run/drunkstumble 30 feet to the door. I burst in the door like a viking returning from some fucking battle and holler “WHATS UP FUCKS” to everyone in the store, which was thankfully just the 2 people behind the counter, who looked probably as scared/confused as a jamba juice employee could look.
So anyway, as my dad explained the situation I looked up at the jamba juice menu and was utterly fucking lost in it. Like I swear I was looking at this menu board for a year, deciphering this Rosetta stone of fruits. I distinctly remember that I was looking at each item in a smoothie, thinking of how it tasted, then moving on to the next thing and thinking of how that tasted, and how they would taste together. Since most smoothies had 3 or 4 items, this took some thinking. So my dad sees me in this extreme brain blast state of mind and says “hey are you going to order or what”. Keep in mind I’m on the first fucking smoothie on the list here. So I just say “shush man I’m trying to do fruit science”, and then when I realized that this process could take literal years, I just said “yeah give me a smooth regular” which for the uninitiated, isn’t actually a real thing on any menu. Oh, also I asked them if the “boosted” smoothies would give me super powers and then pointed my fingers at them and made “lightning noises”.
So my dad just orders me the first thing on the menu and I go to sit down and stare out the window or some shit and my thoroughly amused dad just looks at me and says “how ya feelin?”. Now at this time I was feeling a lot of things, but most noticeable to me was the gauze in my mouth, so I just look at him and say “there’s these fuckin… tiny sheep in my head” which at the time was the best way I had to convey this feeling. Anyway about that time, the jamba juice guy brings us our drinks and he gives me a small thing of mario kart stickers and I swear I almost cried from the tsunami of emotion that gift made me feel (I still have them).
Anyway the rest of the story is we drove home and I explained this programming project I was working on to my dad in perfect detail somehow and then I came home and went on facebook and posted a comment on my friends status (because I couldn’t find the status update bar) that read: “i just took a lort of painkillers and yelled at everyone in a jambo juice”
Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil
its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies
at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes
FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS
AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT
DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER
FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY *Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe
1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.)
1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.)
½ cup - 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.) After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load.
^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent
WHAT Thank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give!
Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply.
Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco.
Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray.
Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda)
Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make.
I see some of y'all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets.
I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one
Keeping this.
Dean and Rowena in 12.11 (◡‿◡✿)
WHAT!!!!
No
They can leap 36 feet
As in leap forward 36 feet
They don’t jump 36 feet into the fucking sky do you know how terrifying that would be the human race wouldn’t have survived because we’d have all had heart attacks while still in Africa
#death from above
this post makes me cry every single damn time
It keeps getting better! I love these two.
And the Winchester Twitter/Instagram saga continues. This just makes me so happy.
the great gatsby au where gatsby says “my dude” instead of “old sport”
Dean + Angry & Protective
i think this is how i feel most of the time
i got u balloons
omg you are so cute
i got u a cat
i made you a cake
got u a party hat for the party for u
Streamers!
hello friend i bring u anime
I brought happy music :D
THIS IS THE HAPPIEST POST EVER IM SMILING SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS LONELY GIRL HAPPY
Dean Winchester | 12x01 Keep Calm and Carry On [ x | x ]
“Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!” I shrieked, upstarting— “Get thee back into the tempest and the Night’s Plutonian shore! Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken! Leave my loneliness unbroken!—quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!” Quoth the Raven “Nevermore.” — The Raven by Edgar Allan Poe (The Raven- Celebrity Readings for Astor Benefit) [x]