Sometimes I'm Funny @windinw - Tumblr Blog

this blog is pro turn signal

We naturally put millionaires and billionaires in the same general class of person, but the only reason to do that is because the words are similar. Since these aren’t numbers we can actually visualize, it’s important to understand what a billion of something is. To travel a million inches, you’d have to travel from the Southern-most tip of Manhattan and go to the Bronx. To travel a billion inches, you’d have to fly from New York to Shanghai twice. A million seconds is a little over 11 days. A billion seconds is nearly 32 years. A million ounces is about the weight of a train car. A billion ounces is 4.5 Eiffel Towers. Use these to conceptualize what the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire is, and the absurd amount of wealth we’re talking about.

robotlyra

Millionaire: I can buy a fancy sports car, and a huge house!

Billionaire: I can buy THE SPACE PROGRAM

baawri

karayray1-deactivated20230129

White people get so angry when they’re presented with the truth.

biculturalist-deactivated201612

That moment when a single scene in a Bollywood film educates you about the reality of American politics.

itstiddybois

does anyone know the name of this film?

brixtonlore

The film is called Kurbaan…if anyone wanted to know.

liilyevanspotter-deactivated201

rasen-shuriken-blog

abortion that late should 🚫❌

I did not know that in 7 states in America, you can carry out an abortion the day before you give birth (allows abortion at any time). That’s so fucking disgusting. And other states allow abortion up to 28 weeks. That’s not a ball of cells no more, that’s a damn baby. It’s good that abortion is legal but not the fucking late into the pregnancy 😷😷 nasty

evilterf

You do know the reason abortion is carried out that late in a pregnancy is because of fetal abnormalities, right? There’s no woman that stays pregnant for 8 months and then decides “Meh, I’m just gonna have an abortion instead.”

These women are not nasty, they are not evil, they are women who were so excited to welcome their little one into this world. They are women who had a nursery set up and baby clothes bought. They are women who excitedly waited for their due date, took belly photos and updated the world on how their pregnancy was coming along. They are the women who woke up one day and felt that their baby wasn’t moving anymore. They are the women that felt in their gut that something was terribly wrong, just to have their worst fears confirmed.

They are the women who went to a regular checkup to find out that their baby is severely deformed and won’t live outside the womb, or will but only for a few days and suffer terribly the whole time. They are the women who have to make a decision to not let their baby suffer.

Women having abortions that late are not women who just decided to get an abortion 8 months into pregnancy. While that is there right to do so, know that isn’t what happens. Know that that isn’t the reality.

fem-bomb-om-em-deactivated20180

This is really upsetting to read but it is the truth, more people need to know this.

appropriately-inappropriate

Something like 90% of abortions are first trimester, which is so early that the medical terminology vacillates between “zygote” and “fetus”, and whatever the name, the thing’s the size of a pencil eraser and has 0% ability to survive outside of the womb.

The remainder are performed in the 2nd trimester, generally as a result of fetal abnormality or a severe congenital defect.

The vanishingly rare 3rd trimester abortions are generally for one of two reasons:

1) the life of the mother is in serious danger 2) the fetus is either dead or dying

So no. Women aren’t just bouncing on coat-hangers at 37 weeks for a giggle, they’re undertaking a serious medical procedure for a heartbreaking reason.

But nice try, jerk.

taraljc

THISSSSS.

kailyndavillier

FOR EVERYONE THAT MIGHT BE CONFUSED READ THIS

lauraannegilman

Banning a D&C at later points also forces a woman to carry a dead fetus within her, full term. Even if it endangers her life (or, possibly, the life of a still-developing twin). Because some men think human woman are the same as pigs and cows, and should behave accordingly.

radwitchescauldron

I’ve known someone in the position of carrying a dead fetus in her body. The kid had a name and a crib and handmade blankets and a mountain of toys. There were baby showers and a little plastic bath thing and those toys that are supposed to make baby smart. There was even a special backpack for taking the kid hiking.

If the first doctor she saw had listened to her, all that stuff might even have gotten used. But instead, the kid died that night. Her mother carried a corpse in her uterus for 3 days, running a horrible fever and coming close to organ failure.

So go fuck yourself if you think she should have died with the kid. Pro life, my big round ass.

getoffmyastroturf

These fucks know nothing. They don’t understand that late abortions are 100% unwanted and break the mother’s heart.

They’re so self-righteous and self-absorbed they are incapable of putting themselves in the woman’s shoes.

officialweatherwax

It’s part of the propaganda war against abortion. The “selfish slut who can’t be bothered to be pregnant and doesn’t care about the baby she’s killing” is easy to demonize and people have no problem denying her an abortion. The fact that she doesn’t exist is incidental.

midoriko-sama

A woman I know recently had to carry a baby to term, because my Mediterranean, highly Catholic bullshit country has illegal abortion still. Her baby was developing without any brain tissue, and she found this out during her second trimester. She had to carry an essentially brain dead child for five more months, growing larger and larger like nothing was wrong, smiling and fielding questions from those not in the know about gender, due date, all the congratulations that must have hurt so much. She gave birth, and the baby died minutes later. They didn’t even babtise it on time, so now it’s buried in unconsecrated soil, too. Because she obviously didn’t suffer enough.

Now she’s on suicide watch. I hope that makes you feel REAL.good. that no abortion took place.

penicillium-pusher

my counselor: how are you doing?

me: good, how are you?

my counselor: good, what brings you in today?

me: im doin real bad karen

rite-of-darkness-deactivated201

when you listen to music from the 70s and 80s

pistefive

drawnxout-deactivated20150903

a metaphor of my life

samandriel

best moment on television. ever.

penicillium-pusher

my counselor: how are you doing?

me: good, how are you?

my counselor: good, what brings you in today?

me: im doin real bad karen

capacity

People: *showering me with compliments* Me: okay but what about that one negative comment I received June 6th 2003 ? Im trash sweetie

dioynsus

i want that really cliché friend group who takes long drives together and takes pictures of each other when they’re not looking and goes on random picnics and visits museum together fuck i want it so bad where y’all at

v3nice

“Truth or dare?” “Dare.” “Order me a pizza.”

sand-paper-dreams-blog

I HAVE BEEN BLIND TO THE POSSIBILITIES

babeimgonnaleaveu

Pulp Fiction (1994) dir. Quentin Tarantino

dreamlightasafeather

IF YOU NEED TO CALL 911 BUT ARE SCARED TO BECAUSE OF SOMEONE IN THE ROOM, dial and ask for a pepperoni pizza. They will ask if you know you’re calling 911. Say yes, and continue pretending you’re making an order. They’ll ask if there’s someone in the room.

You can ask how long it will take for the pizza to get to you, and they will tell you how far away a dispatcher is.

Here is an example video

t-pose-to-assert-gayness

Reblog to literally save a life

anotherdayforchaosfay

I’ve done this. I’m alive because of this.

My flat-mate’s date for the night was almost as drunk as her. She had passed out in her room and locked the door. He refused to leave because he wanted to have sex. He also demanded food because he was dealing with “whiskey dick”. He didn’t like the lack of food in the fridge. I called 911, did the stuff stated above, and he was getting PISSED about how long the “order” was taking. He took my phone, demanded they “hurry the fuck up”. Police arrived two minutes later, arrested him, and helped me file a police report. Pressing charges wasn’t necessary because he had warrants on him from THREE different states for the very thing he planned to do to me. Several months after this happened one of the officers informed me he was charged with two felonies because he crossed stay lines, and will be serving no less than 35 years in prison. The officer ripped into my flat-mate about her bringing home complete strangers, while drunk, knowing full well this shit could happen.

This was 14 years ago.

Do the pizza order, do it as calmly as you can. The dispatcher I spoke to said things like this:

“If he’s drunk say you want mushrooms.” I said I want extra mushrooms.

“If he’s threatening you with sexual assault say you want onions.” I said I want onions.

She went like this with different toppings and sauces for a description of him, like pineapple if he’s blonde, black olives if he’s tall, extra large if he’s tall, etc.

They’ve heard this sort of coded call before. They’re trained for it. They will understand what you’re saying. Order the pizza.

torios

Really though. I’m in training for dispatch and this was one of the first things they taught us. Pretend you’re talking to a friend or relative, pretend you’re ordering pizza, we’ll figure it out. We’ll word questions so you can answer in an easy, casual way. Please, just make the call and we will do everything we can to help you.