Author, horror fanatic

Author of : Undead Redhead, Dead Flies & An Ocean and A Desert

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Ruben won't dance with Mona, but he danced with Niall. I mean, he was high at the time, but it still counts

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Criterion Challenge

15. This is Spinal Tap

Logged May 10

I don't know why I didn't watch this sooner because I knew I would love it, and I did! I loved every second of it. It also blew my mind because I had no idea that the episode of The Nanny where Fran impersonates a woman named Bobbi came from this, or that this is where the song Stonehenge fucking came from. Supernatural plays that song in one of my favorite episodes, Simon Said, that I must have seen 100 times, so when they started singing it in Spinal Tap I felt like that gif of DiCaprio snapping and pointing his finger at the TV. I had encountered bits of this movie for years and never knew it, which in itself is incredible.

This is another one of those additions to the criterion that seems so random but I'm glad its there. I just loved this so much. If you don't like mockumentaries, I would still suggest you watch it, cause its a fantastic display of dry humor used right and is just silly. The guys are so dumb, and I could watch a whole series of them just doing nonsense. Especially Nigel. He reminded me of Ozzy lol Every scene of him, I just saw Ozzy.

Also David, Nigel and Jeanine should have had a threesome. Feels like someone they would honestly have done.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

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To me Ep 5 really shows how Ruben and Niall are really the only people who could match each other, go toe to toe in their own unique, fucked up way. They're terrible for each other and make each other worse, but they are very much built for each other. Niall sees Ruben's rage, he may be afraid of it, but he isn't as weary of it as everyone else. He treats the rage as something that's just a part of Ruben and therefore acceptable. He just wants Ruben to control it better and not direct it to him. Then Ruben sees that dark side in Niall that no one seems capable of noticing until its too late. He sees it and thinks nothing of it unless it's becoming a problem for him personally, and enjoys when it comes out to play all the same.

They're the worst kind of soulmates and all of Scotland will suffer.

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Everyone joking that Ruben is always smelling Niall yet couldn't pick up his scent on the robe but what if he did recognize the scent and was just saying that to see what Niall would say- admit, defend Mona, suggest a fake name, etc? What if he figured it out but doesn't care cause it's fine if Niall had sex with Mona since he and Ruben are the same soul, or because Niall is also someone he "owns" so its just his two wives getting down and yeah that's fine, nothing wrong with that lol

If he doesn't know and finds out later and that is his reaction, it's honestly going to be so fucking funny.

As for poor Benji, Ruben already had an inkling that Mona was sleeping around so he was itching to do something anyway and Benji invoked the wrath of Naill himself when Mona admitted to having previous affairs, which Niall assumes included Benji, so he sets his rapid rottweiler on him.

Also does this episode imply that Niall LET Alby get beat up because we see that he is capable of calming Ruben down. That scene alone changed everything about Niall's reactions to Ruben's temper for me. Its def happened before too, he knew what to do and didn't seem shocked that he did so, like "wow I can't believed I stopped him," its clearly something he's done before and yet, he couldn't save Alby. Was he just not trying hard enough or were his attempts to pull Ruben away half assed as a way to "punish" Alby for trying to out him? Maybe he was going to let it go on for a minute before stopping Ruben but wasn't able to cause he got pushed against the cabinet and was knocked out. That scene makes me look at the Alby assault differently. Just theorizing. Haven't done this for a tv show in a long time, forgot how fun it is lol

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Criterion Challenge

14. Blue Velvet

Logged April 29

I've been diving into Lynch lately. I went from hardly seeing any of his work to starting this year with Twin Peaks, Lost Highway, Mulholland Drive, and Blue Velvet. Gotta say, I'm loving how weird as fuck his work is. I know he's famous for being surreal, but it's one thing hearing about it and another thing to actually see it. So far, Lost Highway is my favorite. Gave me chills.

Blue Velvet, though, didn't connect with me the way I think it connects with a lot of other people. I enjoyed it, really liked it actually, but given what I heard about it beforehand, I think I was just a bit underwhelmed. It's so beloved and considered to be the top Lynch film by a vast majority, but I don't know, I think I found it to be too straightforward compared to his other work that I've seen. It's the theme of uglyness underneath a polished surface in heavy abundance. That's something Lynch seems to love playing with. It's all over Twin Peaks. The exploration of corruption where no one expects it or evil that everyone pretends to not see. However, I wasn't fully on board with the way he shows this contrast here. Basically, I found every part of the "ordinary" world to be kinda dull. Love Laura Dern, but her little love story with Kyle MacLachlan kept pulling me out of the narrative cause I just did not care. I understand the reason for her to be here, that she needs to be a high contrast to the world of Frank Booth and Jeff's darker relationship with Dorothy, but I just wasn't a fan of that half. On the other hand, just like Jeffrey getting sucked into that darker world, unable to resist it, I was captivated by everything happening in the underbelly of this quiet, white picket fence slice of suburbia. Frank's main introduction to the audience, "Shut up! It's daddy, you shithead, where's my bourbon?" will never leave me. He certainly lived up to the reputation of being one of cinema's most twisted characters for me.

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GIF by mulderscully

[tubbsmccracken]

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Niall and Ruben are basically Tobias Beecher and Chris Keller from OZ

They even gave Niall a trauma induced rat slut era. He's literally Tobias lol and anyone who watched OZ can tell you that as pathetic Tobias acted, he was demented when you let him loose 😂 he's Niall. No debate.

[seasonofhorror]

HEREDITARY (2018) dir. Ari Aster

THE WITCH (2015) dir. Robert Eggers

[animusrox]

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*Spoilers*

Just so confused about the preview for next week cause it has Ruben making Niall spy on his wife and then before Ruben seemingly beats someone up/kills someone?? you hear Ruben shout at Niall "she told you fucking everything" or something like that.

Like what?? What did she tell him? Fucking what? Who is he beating up? What does this mean? When does Niall's book drama get crammed in here? There's too much going on! This is like an Agatha Christie violent gay soap opera

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Criterion Challenge

13. Come and See

Logged April 26

There is a way to encapsulate this film perfectly, and it comes from the biblical passage that gives it its name. "And when he opened the fourth seal, I heard a voice of the fourth beast say Come and See. And I looked, and behold a pale horse; and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed him." -Revelations 6:7-8

It's a hellscape filled with death, it feels like you've walked into Dante's Inferno and all you can do is watch. I'm not going to be able to put my feelings about this film into words the way I want because I can't properly describe the feeling it creates. You just feel heavy. It's hard to watch and hard to get through, and it makes you feel heavier the longer it goes, all the way until the end where you're close to feeling empty despite the heavy weight crushing you down. If you want to compare it to any other film, the only one that comes close is Apocalypse Now, but I don't think even that captures the human cruelty, soullessness, and pointlessness in the way that Come and See does.

It's strangely beautiful. So many shots, paired with continuous long takes that just follow people around, are picturesque like a haunting painting that you don't want to look at but can't help staring at. It's impactful because it shows the ground, the people, instead of the actual war, and often lingers on the aftermath of a massacre rather than showing the action or glorifying it. It strips everything a viewer might think is "cool" about war and shows only the somber cruelty.

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Criterion Challenge

12. Hell's Angels

Logged April 21

This is where the famous line about "slipping into something more comfortable" came from, so that was fun to hear in its original form. I already knew a little about this movie from listening to the You Must Remember This podcast covering the antics of Howard Hughes, and then from watching the film The Aviator, which dedicates a decent chunk of the story to the making of Hell's Angels, so I had semi-high expectations for this, and in the end it was a bag of mixed results.

The actual plot is very forgettable. Thin and quite boring. I had a very hard time telling James Hall and Ben Lyon apart for some of it, and everything with Jean Harlow, as much as I enjoy seeing her, was incredibly tedious after a certain point. The film crams her into the narrative in places where she's not needed and the trouble she's supposed to bring falls flat for me.

The story isn't this movie's strong suit because it's all the plane action that makes this movie famous, and for that, it certainly earns its fame.

Even by today's standards, the plane sequences are a marvel. The dog-fighting scenes and the explosion of the war blimp were freaking amazing. It was these moments where the moves come alive with energy, and you become almost awestruck. You can see why Hughes nearly killed himself to film it all.

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GIF by mizworldofrandom

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Criterion Challenge

11. My Own Private Idaho 😭

Logged April 4

I have been wanting to watch this for years but was always putting it off because I never felt prepared enough. I always have a difficult time watching River Phoenix movies because seeing him just makes me emotional. Even something silly like I Love You to Death, dumb fun all around and it gets me down. Of all the actors I love who died young, he is the only one that really affects me, I don't even really know why, but anyway, I was right about what this movie would do to because it destroyed me. I loved it, loved River and Keanu, the way it was filmed, the way the sex scenes were filmed, the whole narrative but good god did I just sit there afterwards lost in emotion. Had that thousand-yard stare going on.

This film is perfect; I loved every second of it. Mixing Shakespeare with a study of teenagers growing up on the street is always guaranteed to be interesting. There was a feature on the DVD of Van Sant talking about how he wanted to create a playful or carefree atmosphere in the early scenes with the boys, especially when they were in groups, to highlight their personal coping mechanisms in their circumstances. They look like they're having fun, talking and playing pranks, because it's the only way they can get through their day-to-day life. It creates a contrasting atmosphere, with these fun moments that feel like it's from Dazed and Confused sprinkled between moments of somber reality. The longer it goes, the sadder it gets, and those light moments start occurring less and less, and then we get to the campfire scene and it just gets so much worse.

It stayed in my head LONG after I finished it, just hanging around like a worm digging in deeper, trying to torture me. All you want to do is hold Mikey in your arms and give him a fucking home cause clearly Scott's not gonna do it, that bastard.

My third Gus Van Sant film after To Die For and Drugstore Cowboy. He's quickly becoming one of my favorite directors. Now I need another year to prepare myself for my next River P. watch.

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GIF by cosmicplxnets

[wulfhalls]

half man spoilers

richard gadd cooking: this is specifically for the 30 year olds on tumblr to kill themselves over!!!!! im dropping the weight of a thousand suns on their chests!! FUCK THOSE GUYS ON TUMBLR.COM!!!! I feel like I just went thru a lobotomy this is so achingly romantic im gonna be genuinely sick. the sheer enormity of that admission. MINUTES after marrying another man.

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Criterion Challenge

10. Moonstruck

Logged March 23

"Snap out of it!"

I knew this line already cause they always played it during a classics montage of special screenings at my theater so I was looking forward to seeing it for real 😂

My mom loves this movie so I watched it with her and that's the perfect way to watch this, you need a lot of food and a bunch of friends, maybe a cocktail. Its just a cute movie. I don't usually like movies in this genre, romantic comedies or stories about big families just loudly going through a little situation like My Big Fat Greek Wedding, but somehow this worked for me. I think it's Nic Cage. He doesn't fit in with anyone else and as a result fits in perfectly, just a mopey drama king with his one hand.

This is an oddball for the criterion but I'm glad it's included.

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[gothspinsters]

i’m going to bed but i’m still thinking about newyorker casually spoiling me with this paragraph lol:

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I've seen enough reviews that hint at the end being ambious but where they admit how they feel, some mentioned that it's implied they stand at a chance of separating or continuing their toxic codependency and then one review said the end was "demented" so I think a confession of love is most definitely on the table.

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Is it just me, or does Ruben look like he'd been crying before the wedding scenes? Like, his eyes are all red. That or they're bloodshot from something else, like drinking or no sleep. They just look so sore.

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Obviously Niall and Ruben meet up as adults and likely makeup before the wedding cause we see them having multiple interactions as adults outside of the wedding attire and then theres the hospital scene where they hug which I'm pretty sure is also before the wedding and yet...Ruben is there clearly pissed about something and beating Niall up. Is he just mad that Niall is getting married, mad he's marrying Alby or did these two fuckers do something else to each other??

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Also I'm pretty sure Niall is the one who called Ruben about the wedding, maybe he just didn't expect him to actually show up but about 80% certain it was another "I need you" moment cause Niall did not look happy before he walked down that aisle, even before Ruben showed up lol