Untitled

[handsywoman]

strangers to colleagues to friends to soulmates <3

[sinmonger]

Hollanov + tweets (part 2)

[gardenvarietyhuman]

💥🙌👏

[ineffablebookgirl]

Well shit, Henry Jenkins, out here in 1997 dropping truth bombs

[addressmysol]

Oh hey I need this for a research paper I'm writing, thank you!

[angstbotfic]

i mean he had been out here since 1988 dropping such bombs:

"'fandom' is a vehicle of marginalized subcultural groups (women, the young, gays, etc.) to pry open space for their cultural concerns within dominant representations; it is a way of appropriating media texts and rereading them in a way that serves different interests, a way of transforming mass culture into a popular culture"

Jenkins, Henry. “Star Trek Rerun, Reread, Rewritten: Fan Writing as Textual Poaching.” Critical Studies in Mass Communication 5, no. 2 (1988): 85–107. https://doi.org/10.1080/15295038809366691.  

there are even some earlier works in fan studies but that’s what i have ready to hand. 

[myshangel]

anyway shane has an office at the irina foundation HQ in ottawa bc he can never get any work done at home and its important to him that hes Somewhat Involved even if he doesnt get to spend much time there. ilya comes by to pick him up so they can go to dinner post-outing and gets five seconds into a joke about sexy mr hollander and his big fancy desk before he notices there’s a framed picture of him just. sitting there. on the big fancy desk. shane framed a picture of him and keeps it on his desk, in public. it’s not even that good of a picture, it’s just ilya sitting on the couch in sweats and smiling at the camera. probably one of the many pictures that shane has sent to his parents over the years, proof of life after an injury or something equally inane.

but it’s there, in a nice frame. and ilya stops mid-joke and points at it and says “this is me?” as if it could be anyone else. shane’s shrugging his jacket on and doesn’t even know what he’s talking about, not really, until he looks over to where ilya is pointing. and he looks between ilya and the desk a few times, confused, because… yes? obviously?

“you have a picture of me on your desk?” ilya asks, and he’s trying so hard to play it off like it’s nothing, something to tease him about, but. but.

shane shrugs. “well, yeah. i like that picture of you.”

“is a bad picture, hollander.”

“fuck you. it’s my desk. i can put what i want on it.”

and maybe ilya would say something like oh i’ll put you on the desk in a minute if he wasn’t suddenly feeling very raw. a few years ago he would’ve said it anyway, but he’s so stuck on the fact that shane has a picture of him on his desk. after a decade of deleting pictures and messages, being so careful not to be photographed anywhere near each other, not even being able to have pictures in their own homes— now shane has a soft, domestic, printed fucking photograph of him framed on his desk in his office. in the headquarters for the charity they share. named after his mother. named for his mother, a name that shane chose, for everything she went through.

“baby, oh my god,” shane is panicking, dashing over the few steps to ilya and wiping the tears from his cheeks with the sleeves of his jacket, “ilya, if you don’t like the picture i can change it.”

“no, no,” ilya tries to wave him off, feeling silly, feeling vulnerable, but shane doesn’t let him go. eyes so wide, so earnest and worried. “no, i like it. i like you. i like you a lot. fuck.”

and shane laughs, but it isn’t mocking or mean or anything ilya would expect from anyone else who might catch him crying. it never is, not with his shane. he just smooths his thumb over ilya’s cheekbone and presses closer to him and says, “i like you too. it’s a good job we’re married, ‘cause otherwise it’d be, like, embarrassing how much i like you.”

[azaablue]

personal hc that one of the hollanov kids loves hockey but it's just not clicking even though they practice all the time and shane and ilya both try different coaching methods with them and it only makes everyone more frustrated and then one day wyatt comes to the rink with them and after 1.5 seconds on-ice he's like "hey i think they're a goalie" and shane and ilya nearly black out because oh. ohhh my god. they're kid is totally, completely, a goalie. and that's why it wasn't fucking working. they have a fucking goalie.

[turquoisedata]

How very depressing that Neil Gaiman had trended not even a tiny bit for demonstrating what a fucking horrific person he is.

As a reminder, he's suing Caroline Wallner, one of his accusers, for breaking her NDA. Not for libel. He's saying she shouldn't have told anyone about it, not that she lied.

Neil Gaiman Seeks $500,000 From Accuser Caroline Wallner

The author says Wallner broke her NDA by sharing her story with the media, including with New York Magazine.

He doesn't need the money. He's risking the Streisand effect. He is punishing Caroline, he's trying to intimidate other victims who have signed NDAs to scare them into continued silence.

He is no friend to women, to the LGBTQIA+ community, to anyone quite frankly unless he thinks they are of value to him.

Share the story. Put it on Facebook and bluesky and whatever else you're on. Make it clear what a horrifying person he is. Tell your friends. He's paying Edendale a fortune to try and cover this up. Make this hard for him. Make it cost him money.

[turquoisedata]

I thought this post would get 150 notes maybe. 300 at the absolute outside.

It's got more than that in the last few hours.

I'm really glad to know how much people hate him.

To the Friends of Calliope — Kitty Kendall, MA, LCMHC

Thank you all so much for your love and support. If you are a survivor reading this, know that you also deserve to be believed, beloved, and

[wolveramster]

Hayden Pike retires a couple years after Shane leaves the Metros. He could try to move teams, but he’s been playing for more than ten years, he’s sore, he’s tired, he wants to spend time with his family, and hockey isn’t as much fun when he’s not playing with people he gets along with.

So the metros are out of the playoffs and Hayden’s announced his retirement and he and Jackie take the kids to Ottawa to watch uncle Shane and uncle Ilya on their playoff run. Like, they rent a big house in Ottawa and just stay for the month.

The Centaurs have just battled their way into the Stanley Cup finals on home ice. They’ve got 4 more games they need to win, but they’ve got a shot at the cup and the energy is electric. So they’re in the family suite with pizza and music and all the Centaur WAGs and kids, celebrating (a little bit) before they go home to soak in ice baths and see their physios.

Hayden and Jackie walk in with the four kids and are immediately greeted with warm hugs and big smiles… Arthur attaches himself to Shane’s side and the twins go off to find cake with Yuna and little Amber Pike (4 years old now) shimmies out of her mom’s arms with a happy cry of “uncle Ilya!” because of all the Pike kids, she doesn’t remember a time that Ilya wasn’t in her family and she looooves him.

Ilya crouches down with a big smile, ready to pick her up and swing her around, but thirty seconds later she’s not in his arms and he stands up and realizes he’s lost sight of her in the crowd. He glances over to Hayden and Jackie, hoping they’ve got her, but nope - they’re chatting with Bood and Shane’s got Arthur but no sign of Amber…

There’s maybe only 50 people in the room and they’re all friends and teammates and trusted additions but Ilya’s chest goes tight and his vision blurs and for just a minute he feels the way he knows Shane does when the panic starts to set in because he’s lost too much family not to constantly carry the terror that maybe he’ll lose this one too. He pushes the panic down with sheer force of will, the muscle memory of controlling his emotions may be a legacy of his traumatic upbringing but it does have its uses.

And in his huge, booming Captain voice he yells out “EVERYONE FUCKING FREEZE” and every player knows that tone and knows Roz is not fucking around and the room goes almost eerily silent as everyone literally stops moving, maybe stops breathing.

Everyone except for a tiny voice that sings out “swear jar!” and Ilya whips around and there’s Amber, pressed against the back wall and trapped by too many big hockey players and looking a little hesitant, but absolutely okay. And Ilya crosses over to her in four strides, literally pushing bodies out of his way so he can scoop her up and toss her gently in the air, making her laugh - and that sound eases the remaining tension out of Ilya’s body.

Hayden looks at Jackie and Jackie looks and him. They both know they’re calling a realtor in the morning. It’s time to move to Ottawa and live closer to their family.

[pastainhismouth]

I've read so many fics where our boys are doing laundry every single time they fuck and I get it, I too am not a bodily fluid enjoyer

however!

may I introduce the concept of the sex blanket? it's big and soft but not too slidey. it's lightweight enough to be easily bundled into the washer or a picnic basket ('oh my god, ilya, not in the park') but heavy enough to absorb their sweat and come without getting it on what's underneath. it's just the right texture for shane to have on his back or his knees or his ass or rubbing against his face. it's machine washable and dries quickly without getting too wrinkled. it's a kind of ugly nondescript colour that doesn't seem to stain. it's a practical (because shane) and endearing (to ilya) solution

with me so far? okay.

now please imagine the sex blanket as mating call. Ilya comes home from the grocery store and shane is sitting reading on the sofa, glasses on, not looking at ilya - but he's laid out the sex blanket across the couch and ilya immediately drops the groceries on the floor. shane gets out of the shower after his morning run expecting ilya to be up with anya or making them breakfast - but he's on the sex blanket on the bed, smirking, and shane gets hard so fast he's weak from it. one time ilya lays the sex blanket out on the patio while they're making dinner and shane can't stop shooting glances at it through the patio doors, getting flustered even though they're cooking something complicated with a lot of steps that he really needs to focus on. Ilya pretends innocence and won't touch him until they're outside after dinner...on the sex blanket.

all I'm saying is I think our boys are pavloving themselves into getting hard at the sight or feel of a particular blanket and I'm so proud of them yay

[spicyvampire]

Wishing Shane Hollander a very slutty 35th birthday

HEATED RIVALRY (2025−)

[wolveramster]

Thinking about Ilya in the hotel room in tampa, when Shane says “you’re not gay” and he says “no, not completely.”

And we just gloss over this because canonically Ilya is bisexual but

BUT

I think Illya is homoromantic.

And I think that’s what he’s trying to articulate to Shane in that moment. Like, yes. I fuck all hot people. Why would I? But when I picture curling up next to someone or holding someone in my arms, it’s made bodied.

We see him with Svetlana. Silly and playful. And lounging on her lap so she can pet his hair. But it’s decidedly friendly, not romantic. Whereas with Sasha in that bathroom… it’s almost like Ilya is afraid of giving in to what’s between them. He’s so rigid, he’s so careful. And we know it’s not the danger (which Ilya tends to like) so is it maybe that he knows that if he let himself maybe he’d fall for Sasha?

So no. Ilya’s not “completely” gay but I think this is the moment that he realizes (or admits) that he’s not going to fall in love with a woman (even leaving aside the Shane of it all.)

[svetaroses]

Shane is not team mom and conversely Ilya is not team dad. They’re very clearly the gay uncles who have control of the planning and vibes of the situation, consummate meddlers of the highest degree. No parental energy towards the team. However ✋👉 Bood, guy with the grill and the energy of someone holding a child leash, and Wyatt, with a solid presence and a niche hobby nobody else cares about. Those are mom and dad.

[wolveramster]

Hollanov hobbies

Ilya breaks his leg. It’s the worst kind of injury, because after the pain fades away the boredom kicks in, and Ilya likes to keep his body moving so that his brain doesn’t spin. He spends a lot of time in his home gym working arms, back, abs… and trying to work out his uninjured leg when Shane isn’t there to stop him from doing something stupid and unsupported and out of balance. Hours of his day that are usually full that are suddenly unaccounted for - practice and running and press and even stupid things like driving to the grocery store and wandering up and down the aisles.

So when Jackie suggests that maybe Jade and Ruby could come visit for the weekend, Ilya leaps at the chance to watch princess movies and maybe go to the zoo or the museum (if you take your kneeling cart, Ilya, I’m serious) and bake cookies and draw pictures. And they do all those things, but Ilya is shocked that the two girls arrive with balls of yarn and knitting needles and crochet hooks, and seem to be very focused on their new craft. When Ilya gets antsy, Jade offers to teach him and - shocking both her and himself - he picks up crochet quickly and even finds himself enjoying it. The girls leave but Ilya keeps practicing, ordering yarn and hooks and books from the internet and watching YouTube videos to learn new stitches.

Shane gets home from his road trip to find a soft green scarf waiting for him and a sheepish looking husband, but the scarf is of course Shane’s new favourite and Ilya keeps up the habit because it soothes his loud mind and busy hands. It becomes a normal sight to see Ilya on the plane or bus, crocheting while Shane sleeps or talks quietly next to him, or even at tape review with a project in his lap, paying attention but giving his hands something to do. All the Centaurs, plus David and Yuna, the Pike family and Cliff and Rose and Svetlana, end up with something Ilya has made for them. Whenever Shane travels without Ilya, he makes a point of going to a local knitting store and bringing him home wool.

Cassie Boodram doesn’t know what she’s started when she gifts Shane an orchid as a welcome to Ottawa gift when he moves in with Ilya. It’s beautiful, and he takes it and places it carefully in a window sill. “1/4 cup of water once a week while it’s blooming,” she says. “It’s hard to get orchids to bloom a second time, so once it drops its petals you can just mulch it into your back garden as fertilizer.”

Shane feels a wave of sadness at this — he’s not sure why, because the plant doesn’t have FEELINGS, but he hates the idea of throwing something out when it’s not beautiful anymore. Instead, he researches orchids extensively - what to do after they stop blooming, how to coax them into growing new stalks and budding again, and he’s elated when his little orchid blooms for a second time.

As a celebratory gift, Ilya brings Shane home a second orchid, and Shane is every bit as devoted to caring for this one as he was the last one.

It becomes a routine - Ilya brings home Shane a new orchid every time one of his previous orchids blooms again. Ilya loves finding Shane strange varieties and unique colours, and Shane keeps a spreadsheet that tracks the different needs of each of his (6… 9… 14…) orchids, leaving extremely clear directions for the house cleaners when he’s on road trips so his flowers don’t wither.

The first summer after the orchids arrive, Shane frets about leaving them to go to the cottage. He’s got 4 right now, and each has a specific schedule and unique needs. Ilya solves this by scooping them all into a sturdy cardboard box, tucking a ratty towel around them to keep them secure, and placing the box carefully in the back seat.

Shane looks at him with surprise and gratitude, and Ilya just shrugs. “They will like the cottage. Lots of sun.”

[wolveramster]

Shane’s first season with the Centaur’s, Harris figures out that even though Shane doesn’t like social media or really anything that distracts from hockey, he’ll do anything if he thinks it’ll make Ilya happy.

So Harris collaborates with Shane and the arena DJ to create a little surprise for Ilya (that Harris knows fans will eat up)…

The first time a penalty is called on the opposing team while Ilya is on the ice, the arena speakers start playing “Where is my Husband?” as Shane skates out to join Ilya on the power play. Ilya is already laughing at the joke and blows Shane a kiss when suddenly, Shane’s voice dubs over the music saying “your husband is coming” just like it sounds in the song.

The crowd goes wild. Ilya is grinning madly. Shane wins the face off and Ilya almost misses the pass he’s so happy, but instead he goes into Impress Shane Beast Mode and the puck hits the back of the net 22 seconds into the power play.

[wolveramster]

**SPOILER FOR THE LONG GAME/SEASON 2**

Ilya returns to the ice after being healthy scratched for two games by Cromwell post outing, and the Centaurs make it known how much they support their captain, how much they’ve missed him. They’ve been told by the league “not to make a fuss”, so they have to get creative, but the Centaurs are good at that.

Harris gets on socials and posts: “Our team is so excited to have Rozanov (81) back on the ice after his brief hiatus. We’re looking forward to seeing our fans welcome home our beloved captain at tonight’s game!”

Fans pick up on the hint and the stands are filled with homemade signs that say “WE ❤️ ILYA!” and “LOVE WINS (HOCKEY GAMES)🌈” and “IN ROZANOV WE TRUST”.

The announcer introduces each player, just like always, and as is custom, Ilya is last as captain. “And Centaurs fans, he’s back, he’s better than ever, and he’s the PRIDE of the Scotiabank Arena - captain of our team and king of the ice… Welcome back number 81 ILYA ROZANOV” and the crowd roars so long as so loud that they almost miss the DJ playing the chorus of Royal Deluxe’s I’m A Wanted Man as Ilya skates to centre ice and waves. (I’m a wanted man; got blood on my hands; do you understaaaaand; I’m a wanted man.) Coincidentally, it’s one of Ilya’s favourite hype songs.

An unintended side effect of having had the last five days off after an unrelenting season of hockey is that Ilya is better rested and less sore than he has been in six months and he plays like a beast - 2 goals, 2 assists. So he’s the obvious choice for the First Star of the Game (though of course the team was going to give him that regardless.)

Usually the stars of the game just skate out to centre, wave, hand out a stick or two, and go back down the tunnel, but tonight the other two stars (Hayes and Barrett) stick around at the bench and the rest of the team huddles at the tunnel entrance when Ilya’s name is announced.

Ilya’s all ready to ham it up, of course, but as he steps onto the rink the lights change from bright white to pink, white, and blue and the DJ puts on Born This Way and well… Ilya’s never been one to back down from the spotlight. He starts to dance. He’s singing along. He’s got the crowd on their feet. He gestures to Hazy and Barrett and they’re on the ice with him, laughing and waving. The rest of the team floods on to the rink and it’s a full blown dance party.

The best part is that the opposing team (LA) figures out what’s happening partway through and they come back from their locker room, half undressed and not in skates any more, but they clap from the sidelines in a show of support that no one expected.

This, of course, is not what Shane experiences in Montreal. Luckily his first game back is an away game, so he has no expectation of special announcements or support, but the abysmal way he’s treated by his teammates make it clear that even if he’d been in Montreal, no one would have been celebrating.

Ilya can hear the frustration and despair in Shane’s voice when they talk that night, even through Shane’s enthusiasm for Ilya’s big night and his supportive team. And that’s not going to be okay with Ilya so…

He calls Jackie Pike. It’s two days before the next Montreal game, and we need a plan. Jackie gets on HER socials and starts getting fans excited to welcome Hollander home. Harris hears about this and he’s in touch with Montreal’s PR team. (He also posts a SLEW of videos and pictures from Ilya’s return to play, including several with fans holding signs that say “81 + 24 =105/100” and “Who DOESN’T love Shane Hollander???”, tagging the Metros and Shane’s official account so they have to respond.)

Shane hits hometown ice and there are even more signs in the crowd than there were in Ottawa. There are even a few Cens fans in Rozanov jerseys holding signs of support. The PR team has been quietly prepared for this, and they send an emergency email to management that essentially says “we’re going to look like bigoted assholes if we don’t acknowledge Hollander tonight” and management gives a lukewarm thumbs up.

So they give Shane First Star of the Game (it’s subjective but he has of course also earned it) and while it’s not the production Ilya gets, the PR team had cobbled together a video of sone of Shane’s career highlights that play while he takes a lap around the rink and waves and takes in (really) all the shows of support from the fans. And if the PR people snuck more shots of Shane and Ilya playing against each other than was strictly necessary? Well, it’s no secret they play their best hockey against each other, and the sound of the screaming every time Ilya is on the screen is more than enough to justify the choice.

Shane’s team is still shitty, everything still sucks in the locker room, but at least Shane sees that he’s got support around him.

[m1male2]

[balalaijka]

heated rivalry fic recs! (absolute favorites in red)

like one of your girls - shane hollander's internalized homophobia and his jealousy duke it out. this was one of the first fics i read in the hr fandom that actually engaged with how a brutal sport and culture would messily intersect with desire and it's so good

tongues a-wagging - shane starts learning russian from a russian player. who isn't ilya. the monologue in chapter 2 actually made me insane

clear to a hedgehog - ilya is a hockey player, shane is a doctor, ilya thinks shane thinks he's a mobster, they still fall in love

the belly of the whale - shane as a creature that rejects all indulgence, except one, even though it won't love him back (or so he tells himself)

Rotten Saints - ilya going through the downward spiral of self-hatred leading him to propose that shane can sleep with other people, melancholy and beautifully written

Teenage Dirtbag - snapshots of ilya's childhood in russia, or my favorite crackfic in the fandom

World on Your Shoulders - a panacea to all the attempted woobiefication of shane hollander, who, as should be remembered, is a hockey captain with all the baggage that comes with it

Luchik, Darling - ilya and irina and russia and that odd grief of realizing your home isn't your home anymore, gorgeous prose

Dig Two Graves - wherein the centaurs-voyageurs feud gets ugly. this one is bleak and brutal but excellent if you're in the mood to get emotionally eviscerated

lone star series - hollanov and the existencial horror of the self and children, told through an abortion, a miscarriage and an adoption

Friendship in Retrospect - cliff marleau befriends ilya in the way one befriends a stray cat

free rein - i'll just drop a quote here: "You are not a god, Hollander told him once. But, oh. When he looked at Ilya like that."

as you mean to go on - babysitting the pike kids and the angst of wishing for the unattainable normalcies of other people's lives

Halt and Catch Fire - a massive data leak forces shane and ilya to go through the horrors of bureaucratized mhl homophobia, unconventional format with extensive research

Gambit - butch4(closeted)butch hollanov, wherein chess is sex

#noticing - svetlana and shane run into each other in a bar during the rose landry era

Pale Imitations - from the author's summary: "everything is about smoking, except for smoking which is about Shane Hollander"

Good Losing - alpha/alpha hollanov and the perversity of sexuality going up against what should be your nature

return of spontaneous circulation series - they're paramedics, written with incredibly verosimilitude as a medical drama (part 3 is also just *fans my face*)

coach, I'm threading needles - shane attempts to get better at saying no to ilya, ilya responds like any sane person would and sleeps with a girl in shane's jersey

we're strangers, we're not friends - ilya's rookie year as a mildly disastrous teenager

A Good Latch - per the author's tags: "tfw you want to knock Shane up and end up contemplating what it means to parent," incredibly fun

Old Habits - shane meets sasha at svetlana's birthday celebration, or: a spiritual successor to the scene where ilya rejects sasha and then looks at his phone at the thread from jane

behind enemy lines - the daemon au where they're also soulmates and find out in possibly the worst scenario (sochi)

autoclave - fuck or die with all the angsty consequences

Observations on Fatherhood - shane and david hollander and the pain of knowing you can only try to protect your child from the world

Wreck My Plans - shane attempts to deal with his feelings for his rival by setting up rules to guide himself by to not get too close. if he's succeeding or not is debatable

The Great Jane Debacle of 2016 - the raiders get stuck with post-tuna melt ilya's crashout, texting fic, hits the sweet spot of crack-angst

Sunday Blue - an absolutely dizzying cnc fic. they're insane about each other and it's so good

A Study in Denial - that feeling when you run into your ex-situationship in the bathroom of the club you're at with your hetcomp girlfriend and you're Totally Over Each Other

four steps to death - or: how to mourn a brother who hated you in a country that's becoming foreign to you

About Summer - the plane disappears, but ilya comes back. so i know i said that DTG was devastating but this. this one actually made me sob—"You will see the blue sky and think I saw that too. And listen to cicadas and you will remember golden dog days and being alive in the wrong hour of the world. You will think summer and then think of these things and then of me."

one of your eyes is always half-shut (something happened when you were a kid) - alexei rozanov's run out of luck in a long luck-less life with a mother who hated him and a brother who's too soft

Change Your Win Conditions - ilya's career-ending injury before he and shane can get back together means he becomes the centaurs' coach. shane finds him anyway

Dinner Tonight? - when you realize you're married and haven't been on a date before, which must be rectified in the most chaotic and perfect way imaginable, feat. a meet-cute in the grocery store, wedding ring theft and the misuse of the word "bro"

Table for Two? - in a similar vein to the above, ilya attempts to ask out shane for years during their situationship, one of the best takes on the oblivious trope i've read

Tuna Melts and Longitudinal Studies - the tuna melt incident, before and after, as seen by ilya's reddit posts, with some absolutely devastating banger lines snuck in with the crack

Fuckboy Fuzz - scott hunter and that olympics story where a medalist used his speech to beg for his girlfriend back, skip-style

Asylum - hollanov's centaurs stanley cup win sparks a backlash while ilya's trying to get canadian citizenship, feat. internet hate campaigns, lawyers and immigration (and also spine-chillingly good writing of how good exactly shane and ilya are on the ice together)

smoke on skin - rose landry's relationship to fame, identity, smoking, and ilya rozanov

it waits for you in the shadows - the ilya domdrop fic

Only You (Could Ruin Me Like This) - shane drunk-dials ilya after the club scene

Buzzer Beater series - orgasm denial, the ocean scene in part 2 is insane

and i'll show you fearless - under-negotiated kink as character study my beloved, incredible writing: "Shane is staring up at him with the moon in his mouth, bright and defenceless. Ilya gets the idea that even if he’d thrown a fist into Shane’s face at this moment, Shane would either let it pass through him like air, or else he would ask how many more times he could be hit."

wait for a different ending - another ilya goes to russia for the last time fic, feat. impulsive dog adoption

holy matrimony - that feeling when you marry the love of your life hastily in secret in a tiny office and for years it's a secret and it's enough but now you're faced with all the things you could have had at the wedding of the other big gay couple and it's tearing at your heart

virtue theory - shane hollander vs. the awful reality of the possibility of failure even if no mistakes were made

mosquito - in complete contrast to the above, ilya rozanov & the trainwreck experience of never denying yourself anything and then crashing out after being denied

anybody like you - shane and shane's figure skating buddy joe, or: closeted man is amazed at his comfort in a new group of friends, not knowing they're queer

6:00am, day after christmas - another shanebortion fic, nobody is having a good time but they're trying

sun bleached flies - svetlana on slowly finding your best friend unknowable, feat. the nuclear poison atmosphere of the rozanov household

no roses for my grave - ilya on the pain of being grigoryevich and, as fiona apple once said, "hunger hurts and i want him so bad, oh it kills"

pierce through me (hit me so physical) - ilya gets his ears pierced and shane is So Normal about it

oh come on shotgun bride - short but excellent fic with yuna & ilya

winners-verse series - so you know how by moving to ottowa ilya's ended the rivalry by downgrading? and how love and resentment don't cancel each other out but can grow together like a twisted tree? how the best intentions can have painful results and sometimes the only thing to do is to learn to live with it? this series is genuinely so fucking amazing, part 2 especially with the realization that love made me do this incredibly stupid thing and i hate it but i can't stop loving you. good stuff

snapping birch - david hollander's phone gets hacked, prompting an outing and a twitter meltdown, directly engages with how exactly did it come to the point that shane didn't want to come out to his parents despite them trying to do their best

another uninnocent, elegant fall - aka what a messy celebrity ilya life would look like

Geryon - ilya, less than healthy sexuality and consent issues on all sides

Game Day - last addition, but i just finished this, great dark humor and an absolutely hysterical twist (but also remember it's dark humor)

edit: ok so this got more attention than i expected, ty! also go and comment on the fics!

[clytemnestraaa]

diabolical heatriv fics part 2

in no particular order. again not listing trigger warnings but u can inbox me if u wanna know something specific.

sympathy fuck by lustmord (the hypersexuality fic)

the weather of your youth by anonymous (the flushing your pills on facetime fic)

wait for a different ending by garagepaperback (the fic that almost was my undoing and i had to put myself to bed and return another day. aka the rat dog fic.)

luchik, darling by chaentics (when u tag something 'immigration and emigration' i am there)

geryon by agoodsoldier (that's my baby child... that's my boy...)

another uninnocent, inelegant fall by anonymous (that's my BOY lmaoooo)

slash and burn by eleadore (i just like it when shane gets to be morally dubious)

like thieves in the night by providing_leverage (ilya playing dead on the bed is such a visual)