This blog used to be a positivity blog for lesbians and bisexual women modded by a lesbian and febfems. Weâre girlfriends! The lesbian has chosen to step down though, so now this blog focuses on febfem women. I donât think it would be right for a non-lesbian to speak on lesbian issues.
The purpose of this blog is to help bisexual women feel good about themselves and their attraction to women.
#media: Media recommendations that febfems may find enjoyable. This blog accepts submissions and suggestions to ad to this tag. Just send an ask!
What is a FebFem?
Febfems are bisexual women who are only interested in other women. They acknowledge they are attracted to men but donât want to engage with them romantically or sexually.
This this definition of FebFem is sufficient for you, great! If you find yourself going "but wait, I have other concerns about the febfem label", your concern may be addressed a question below the read more!
((Below is a sort of FAQ I created because people make all sorts of wild assumptions about this blog! Might as well clear things up because if I say nothing people will keep assuming the worst.))
Can I follow this blog?
Anyone can follow the blog. Thereâs no guest list and Iâm not checking my followers.
Is this blog inclusive and will you speak about (x) group?
This blog focused on bisexual woman who prefer women. I am not comfortable representing groups I am not part of. If you are upset by the fact this blog does not explicitly discuss your experience, there are plenty of other blogs to suit your needs. I see it as a show of respect to not talk over experiences I am not familiar with. I would not want to misrepresent anyone or do harm with my ignorance. The lack of content about whatever group of people does not mean I dislike them.
If you feel it is hateful to focus only on the experience of febfems, that sounds like an issue with yourself. We deserve some spaces for ourselves sometimes!
Can you help me figure out my sexuality?
I do not offer advice on this subject for two major reasons.
1. No matter what you might tell me over an online conversation, there is a lot of information about your experiences and feelings I don't know. I can't know. Words can't convey them. I don't feel qualified to tell you what I think you are. You know you better then I do.
2. I kind of don't relate to the experience of being confused about your sexuality. My advice might be crap as a result. Something like "uhm, are you attracted to men? If you are, you're not a lesbian!". However, I admit that this is a blessing with age. In my youth I was not exposed to any of the strange online discussions about lesbians and bisexuals. I can see how a lot of the weird things people say about the topic would be confusing to anyone, especially if you're young and inexperienced. I don't think anyone who is unsure is foolish.
A post may be written in the future. My lesbian girlfriend and I have been together for like 15 years, so I feel like we a have a unique insight to the differences between male repulsed bi and lesbian attraction. However, specific advice for an individual will never happen.
Aren't febfems the same thing as political lesbians?
A febfem acknowledges her own innate attraction to men and does not act on it. A political lesbian believes that a woman who is attracted to men can make herself into a lesbian. My blog does not support the idea that all sexuality is fluid* and that everyone can change their sexuality. Such an idea evokes conversion therapy and is dangerous, especially to lesbians and gay men.
*I do agree with the idea that sexuality, for bisexuals, can fluid to some extent.
Are you a bad and mean feminist?
I consider feminist principles extremely important. This blog will be written with feminist themes and feminist perspectives. I wonât be focusing too much on other groups. If you are someone who feels a member of an oppressed group having focus on her own needs as bad and mean, that doesn't seem very nice to me. I myself would never ask an oppressed person to focus on someone else over their own needs. Everyone deserves a space of their own to discuss their own issues.
Wanna fight on the Internet with me?
I have no interest in discourse and arguments. I like this blog to be a positive space. I may reblog posts with a slightly negative tone at times but I generally want to keep things positive. If people argue on my posts I will ignore it. Block #negative if you donât want to see negative posts.
Do you agree with the terrible things this person you reblogged from said?
I don't check the tumblr blogs of every person I reblog from and not aware of everyone's belief system before I reblog from them. I'm an adult with a job and other hobbies, so I won't be dedicating a lot of time to assess if everyone passes a set of moral tests before I reblog. If a stand alone post seems fine then I will reblog it. If this makes you feel unsafe, I advocate you not follow this blog. There are other blogs out there that will better suit you.
I admit that I think itâs strange some people on tumblr seem to want me to only reblog from âpureâ tumblr users, but I could have a blog full of praise for confirmed rapist celebrities and that would be seen as less of a problem. ????? what ??? lol
Please enjoy this cute sapphic comic about accidentally adopting a werewolf from the pound based on this post. (Except I made it gay.) Meet Sabine and Jazz as they fall in loooove.
If you enjoyed please consider donating to my Kofi! Comics are a labor of love and tips really really help me out while I'm in school!
the English word âqueerâ means absolutely nothing to most people. i understand that for some americans itâs of great importance but this word has no historical connection to the lgbt rights globally. âqueerâ awakens zero emotion in me bc of the lack of historical context and relation to my culture. i wish gays on tumblr acknowlegded that âqueer" is not lgbt culture, it's american culture. And the online lgbt spaces do not belong to americans only.Â
@satanwithapencil it's alright, so the point is that "queer" is an english word that doesn't have an equivalent in other languages and cultures. lgbt can be translated even though it's clumsy, but rainbow as a term as in rainbow folks, rainbow families, rainbow youth etc is in use in many countries and it's easy to universally translate. i'm not saying it needs to be used by all or anything but I'm saying that the word QUEER is not truly "lgbt culture" bc it literally doesn't exist outside the english speaking countries. it's their local culture. but tumblr makes it seem like we all need to have an opinion about it, as if it's important to all of us (just bc we are forced to communicate in English) while not caring about the international terms. same goes with stonewall and other american cultural history. implying it's the default language and culture is disrespectful and very entitled.
Instructions for an origami vulva! The top picture shows what I achieved with some significant refolding and hand colouring of the book version. Canât tell you how I did it, though, sorry.
Tbh young lesbians need to know that there are women who have never dated men and have exclusively dated women their entire lives. There are women who have never had sex with men and never experimented with men. There are women who have known that they were lesbians for their entire lives and have never doubted that. Itâs so important to hear these voices in a world where heterosexuality seems inescapable for so many young women.
Iâm a lesbian and hate to see lesbian centered post derailed but I want to say this: young bisexual women also need to see women who have never experimented with men. Being bisexual doesnât mean you will necessarily find men youâre attracted to enough so that dating/fucking them would be a good idea, and it doesnât make you obligated to go out of your way to find men worth your time.
If youâre wondering whether youâre bi or gay, you wonât gain any information by sleeping with random men âto make sureâ. You wouldnât like sleeping with a man youâre not attracted to even if youâre bi or straight. If youâre not attracted to somebody, itâs self-destructive to have sex with them or date them. There are lesbians and bisexual women who have never dated or fucked men. Sex or relationships with men are not a mandatory experiences for anyone regardless of sexual orientation.
babygirl i get what u mean but we're already find plastic bags in the mariana trench, we gotta keep our oceans cleanđ launch him into space he's someone else's problem.
Focusing on same sex attraction as a bi women isnât shameful. It isnât a negative thing. It is a wonderful thing. Itâs love and intimacy is all itâs glory. Itâs loving women. Itâs being proud of your ssa and giving it the attention it deserves. Itâs lovely and amazing.Â
