| london |

a diary of my teen years + some tips

[wordsofnayisha]

2019

you may have been my worst best year. does that even make sense?? sure, exams and school were hard and i struggled alot. my mental health was not thriving at the start of the year but essentially everything worked out. i am in a place that i never thought i would be at the start of the year. i have had experiences that i was positive would never happen to me. yeah, i did cry ALOT (probably too much) but as the year has gone on, i have become mentally stronger and happier. to my family and friends who are still here (or maybe that i just met), i know that i am a handful with all my emotions and i know that this year has been hard for us but hey WE MADE IT!! i am forever proud of you all and cannot wait to see all the memories we have in the future. to the people i have loved and lost, i am sorry, i know that i have not always been the best version of myself and i am working on it and i hope to be better and communicating what i am feeling. to the people who have tried (and occasionally succeeded) to put me down, HI i wouldn’t be here without you and thanks for being cows to me but little do you know that i have the best support system and i am SO over caring honestly it is beyond exhausting and i have better things to do hehe. to the person (or people idk who y’all think i am jks) that i have fallen in love with, loool i am hoping you never read this or bring it up (pls don’t i’ll deny that it’s about you) because i cannot seem to tell you this so here i am writing about it, thank you for lowkey becoming my favourite people to talk to (ew i hate this for me urgh), I APPRECIATE YOU with my whole heart and i know that i am so fricking secretive at times and it is frustrating, just know that i love you and i can’t wait to see what the future has in store. 2020, i already have a whole lot planned for you. from seeing (at least) two of my favourite artists live (hi vérité and louis ily) I AM SHAKING WITH EXCITEMENT eeeeek, to hopefully visiting a few friends i haven’t seen in a while and hopefully some more travelling yay, i am so so ready to keep making mistakes but ultimately having the best last year of being a teen and messing up (because that seems to be what i am good at). it is the start of a decade that will change my life. i will (hopefully) graduate, get a job and even get married if i am lucky and whilst i know that for some people this idea that alot can change in the next 10 years will be scary i am really out here welcoming this because for once i actually feel mentally prepared (lets see how long that lasts haha). this will be fun to look back on in a few years but yeah i guess that is all i have to say.

|hi, i don’t post on here as much as i did previously but my twitter drafts are full and i feel like this year needed a bit of self reflection over here even though i know that there are still a few weeks left. anyways, i hope that everyone has a fulfilling holiday season with the ones you love and i guess i will see you in 2020 (a whole new decade huh?)|

[wordsofnayisha]

True passion and friendship as she poured her heart out to the man that she "loved". She knew that he did not care nor did he believe anything she was saying as his past trauma had deemed him incapable of ever loving again. She cared for him deeply and by doing so gave him a piece of her which she would never get back. After all the lies, tears and manipulation she did not care and kept loving him.

something i wrote while procrastinating

[wordsofnayisha]

your account is amazing I’ve been binge scrolling for ages, obsessed :)

thank you so much!! means alot❤️ xxx

[wordsofnayisha]

some self reflection i guess

i’ve spent alot of my life wallowing in self pity, hating every part of myself and comparing myself to people who had what i thought i wanted and then i had many an eye opening conversation with my friends and i started taking accountability for my sadness and the things that I had the power to change. i guess i started putting myself out there to people and gained a whole new layer of confidence that i never thought i would. even though i still think everyone hates me lol i can finally say i am not scared of rejection. it’s taken alot to get to this and i think i’ve literally said it aloud to one person but yeah. i actually like me now (most of me anyway) and i feel like i have got my own back and i can’t tell you how good that feels. i also feel that the people who are actually in my life (not just here for the tea) but those who actually care are the most amazing support system a girl who is constantly overthinking and/or crying (aka me) can possibly have. here’s to continuously blooming and becoming the best versions of ourselves.

|hi it’s been a min but honestly 2019 has zoomed past and i forgot i hadn’t posted even though my drafts are over flowing! so here is a lil something that i actually wrote very recently :)|

[wordsofnayisha]

2019

here's the thing about caring. whether it's caring about what other think or caring about others it’s supposed to hurt. that feeling of finding out someone close to you broke you trust, it freaking hurts. watching someone you care about constantly hurt themselves or not see what you see in them can take alot out of you. but you can't fix other people. if there is one thing i learnt in 2018 is that no matter how hard you try you can't fix what others can't see. you can only guide them (and yourself) to be the best version of themselves that they can be. in 2019, i want to care less about what others think and as hard as i know that will be for i have to try. because wanting validation for your actions is pointless if said actions already made you happy. secondly i want to try to stop overthinking and let life just take me where i am meant to go. as a control freak this will be difficult but overthinking just makes me go through the same think twice and that is completely unnecessary. i also want to try harder in my studies because there are places i want to get to and currently being completely unmotivated but also wanting to get to these places is a struggle. writing is something else i intend to do whenever inspiration strikes as i noticed that it gives me an amazing creative outlet to de-stress and think about my thoughts and feelings

i am not writing this for anyone else but for me. these are a few of my goals that i wanted to document so that i can come back at the end of 2019, another year older and reflect on these.

|happy 2019 to all!! i haven’t posted on here in over 6 months but i hope that everyone is having a brilliant start to the year <3|

[wordsofnayisha]

what to do on a year out

so recently ive had to think about whether i want to take a year out of school before going to university and right now I don’t but some people I do want to so I thought I’d make a list of things that you can do:

get some work experience- if you know what you want to go into in the future then try to find some relevant work experience so this can boost your application and make you stand out from the crowd.

do some charity work- there is a brilliant websites online like projects abroad thatcan set you up with helping in a different country that are less fortunate than you. you can also do various medical ones and politics ones if you want to go into that.

teach the language you speak- there are various courses that you can go to to get a qualification in your mother tongue and then you can go and teach this in a country where they are learning it for example i speak English and I can go on a course in London and i get a qualification so I can teach English in a foreign country.

travel-this is probably what what if you people do but obviously if you have the money you can do this so try and visit places that you want normally go places that people don’t normally go to because that will make your experience much more interesting and try not to stay in really luxury accommodation because you won’t be properly travelling unless you get a little bit dirty doing it.

|these are just a few ideas i have so feel free to suggest any in the comments and i will add them to this list!|

[wordsofnayisha]

life hacks pt 2

some more life hacks:

on televisor.com you can type in a show you liked watching and similar ones should come up.

if you’re having trouble sleeping count backwards from 99 not 100 and you should be out by 50 most of the time.

eat an orange before you workout because that will prevent your muscles are hurting and dehydration.

midomi.com let you hum a song so you can find out what it’s called because i hate the feeling of having a song stuck in your head and not remembering the lyrics.

if you are like me and you like listening to music while you study but you easily get distracted listen to video game music because that is designed to keep you concentrated.

bananas have nutrients that help anxiety so if you feel stressed just eat a banana and that should calm you down.

|hoped this helped anyone!!|

[wordsofnayisha]

apple earphone hacks

hi guys these are just some hacks i have been using with apple earphones and i thought i would share them.

you can pause and play by clicking the middle button once.

if you press the middle button twice and long press the second time you can fast forward a song.

double press the middle button to skip a song.

click the middle button three times and long press on the third to rewind a song.

triple press the middle button to skip a song.

you can use the + volume button to take better photos.

to ignore a call long press the middle button so that they get sent to voicemail.

to answer a call press the middle button and press that again to hang up.

|hope you guys enjoyed this post and found it useful!|

[wordsofnayisha]

bucket list pt.1

here are just a few things that i wanna do (there is gonna be more parts as i think of other things) but i am also going to come back to these posts and cross stuff off as/ if i do it.

attend a film premiere- i just think that this would be so cool because you get to walk the red carpet and meet the actors and i think you may even get to see the film before it is released.

climb a mountain- i am not very athletic at all so i would have to do this with a bunch of people and i think it would be very rewarding especially with the view at the top. i don't think i will climb a very high mountain but i don't really mind.

start a fire without matches-  i really want to learn how to do this as think it would be very useful in some circumstances. i also think it would be a cool party trick to show people haha.

watch the sunrise + sunset in one day- this would be great for the pictures but also just to see how the world can change in just one day and how so much can happed. it would be a really good time to reflect and make for some amazing views.

dye my hair- i would like to dye my hair blue but i don't think it will look great and nor do i have the confidence. so maybe some highlights or a dip dye would be a better option for me.

fly in a private jet- this would make me feel like an a lister but i think being in a plane by yourself for a shot time would be very relaxing as you are above the busy world and just in peace in the clouds.

get a tattoo-  i probably wouldn't get an obvious tattoo but this has been something i have wanted to do since i was very young so i am excited to hopefully one day cross this off the list.

|hoped you enjoyed this and feel free to share any things that are on your bucket list!!|

[wordsofnayisha]

sleep hacks

these are gonna be somethings that i do to try and get to sleep easier/ quicker because i really struggle with sleeping and it affects me at school.

the first thing i would recommend doing is putting your devices on night mode and you can do this on iPhone by going to settings and then brightness and have a night shift and set it to sunrise and sunset and on androids and there is an app that you can get that will do this. this just helps your eyes  by adjusting the blue light which could affect you and make you sleep later. (laptops also have this function) 

i will suggest drinking some kind of hot drink but not coffee before you sleep. i generally go for warm milk because this just makes me feel a bit better inside.

i would also suggest setting your alarm about 10 minutes earlier than you actually have to wake up because you know you’re going to hit that snooze button so just make sure you’re up in time.

i would try and get some kind of fitness band or something that will analyse asleep so you can see how much deep sleep you’re getting and there is often tips on apps that will help you get more deep sleep which helps your body recover quicker.

i would also try not to revise just before you sleep because that will just get you stressed unless it’s consolidation work that you’re doing i wouldn’t try to get stressed about an exam because you will just be up all night thinking about it.

if your thoughts are keeping up at night I would recommend that you write them down and tell yourself that you think about in the morning.

if you have a dream that you want to remember and you wake up in the middle of the night get out your notes page and write down what it was so that you can tell your friends or you can try and figure out what it means hahah.

if you are binge watching something try to stop at season finale because most episodes end on cliffhangers and you don’t wanna be up thinking about what’s gonna happen next.

|hope you guys are having a good week and enjoyed this post xx|

[wordsofnayisha]

sorry if i just spammed you. your accpunt is way super helpful and nice!!!

aww don’t worry about it & thank you so much xx

[wordsofnayisha]

useful apps to have

so these are gonna be some apps that i have on my phone that i think are useful or fun:

goodreads- this app is so good for motivating me to read and recommending me good books based off what i have already enjoyed. you can also scan books that you see in-store and then it will add it to a list a books you might read.

tv time- i adore this app because i watch alot of tv shows and this tracks when they come on as well as what i have to watch and shows that i haven’t started yet but want to.

unidays/ student beans- i am constantly broke so some kind of student discount app is always good to have just to save some money!!!

wave- this is such a calming game and although it took me a while to figure out how to play i love the way that there are no levels and you just play at your own speed.

spotify- a really good app for music but i know that its annoying that you can’t pick the song unless you have premium but you can get 50% off it with a student discount which is what i do.

google maps- this is good for trains and buses as it tells you when it comes and it plans journeys and can get you to places on time!!

some kind of news app- just keep updated with what is going on in the world because this is always good :)

camscanner- this app scans paper so when you’re taking pictures of work you dont have the boarder just the sheet or board that you need!

|hope you enjoyed this post!! i am gonna start posting once a week instead of twice (don’t know if anyone cares haha) and i might occasionally drop a post on a sunday but if there is anything you want me to write about lemme know :)|

[wordsofnayisha]

life hacks pt 1

these are gonna be some hacks which aren't specific to school but just life in general. i am still quite young so i am learning as i go along so there might be a part 2 to this.

use a mirror as a whiteboard as you probably stare at yourself every morning anyway, so you might as well also use the mirror to leave yourself helpful reminders, class notes or formulas.

a good studying incentive is when you reach a gummy bear (or any snack) you get to eat it.

you will never sleep through your alarm if you put your phone in a glass cup before you sleep!

you can place your phone in your car with just one elastic band by putting it through the air vent which is good when you need directions.

stack your clothes in your drawers vertically so you can see what you've got without pulling everything out.

to deal with messy wires use a clip and thread it through so the ends don’t end up on the floor (this wasn’t very clear but you can look it up on google haha)

you can use nail polish to identify different keys so you don’t feel like to have to try every key you have.

you can erase highlighter marks with lemon juice and cotton wool but remember that your page will get wet and have a citrus smell.

buy a thermos and put any hot or cold food in it so that it stays that way!

|hope you enjoyed this and if you have any other hacks feel free to lemme know!!|

[wordsofnayisha]

Sometimes you meet someone and its obvious to you that you are meant to be together. Not necessarily romantically but on some level this person is mean to be in your life for a long time. You guys just work and they make you feel that what you are doing is meaningful. You will meet these people throughout life and though some of them may not stay, there will be a few that will be there forever. This type of friendship or relationship makes me believe in something. Not quite fate but something that has caused me to meet you.

late night thoughts #5

[wordsofnayisha]

dreams

do you ever wake up one morning and think about the dream you just had. you wake up and for a split second you believe that it was real. it was probably something outrageous like going on stage with your favourite celebrity or graduating from the school that you never thought you would or something insane like that. recently I’ve been having a lot of those and they’ve made me realise a few things. first things first half of them are probably never going to happen but that’s okay. however the other half are achievable and if I put my mind to it I can do it at least that’s what everyone tells me. i’ve been learning that you have to be enthusiastic and go for the things you want to do. if you want that crazy, outrageous, insane dream to come true you have to go for. you may have heard this a million times before, so have i but only recently when thinking about my future have i realised that this is so true. only you truly know where you want to be in the future and only you can make that happen.

|this is super over said but so so important!!|

[wordsofnayisha]

homework tips

for me the most hated part of school (apart from waking up at unholy hours) is homework. often teachers will set a lot of it for a very short due date. these are gonna be my tips on how not to basically drown in homework and what i try to do daily:

get a planner and actually write things down in it even if you think you will remember (my post on my planner)

do the work that you are least looking forward to doing just so that it is out of the way.

start as soon as you possibly can. i know that school can drain you but the sooner you start the sooner you can finish.

i am definitely not going to tell you to do the work they day its set because you can have a day where you just don’t feel like doing anything (me today) but make sure you try and do each piece of work at least two days before its due.

if you have studies or long breaks try and get started at school if you can. you can always talk and keep your attention on your work at the same time.

don’t just google the answers. trust me it will save time but a lot of homework that is set is meant to help with the learning and if you’re stuck you can ask the teacher, use the textbook and then look online (be careful though as not all the info is reliable).

if you have a big project try to split it up into manageable aims for each day so it doesn’t look as scary and this will also help the planning process.

you can live without your phone or laptop for an hour it is really okay!! if you use your laptop like i do for your homework then you will probably just be using word or notes so turn off the internet even if you are saving your work to the cloud when there is no connection it will save to your laptop until a connection becomes available.

|hope you guys enjoyed this and feel free to let me know if you have any more tips on how to do homework more efficiently.|

[wordsofnayisha]

Maybe the kind of love I am looking for is so unique that I will be searching for a long time. Maybe the kind of love I am looking for in another person is already right in front of me but I am just too oblivious to see it. I was once told that you meet the person you are meant to spend your life with before you are eighteen. I don’t think that’s true because there will always be people that catch your eye and they may not be destined for the same path you are.

late night thoughts #4