Write? Nah. Procrastinate.

My life revolves around procrastinating my two novels-in-progress. One day they'll be complete, for now another cup of tea.

[missmentelle]

This is a big, giant list of Youtube tutorials that will teach you all the basic life skills you need to know in order to be a functional adult. There are a lot of important skills that aren’t included in this list, but this should be enough of a basic guide to get you started and prevent you from making a total mess of yourself. Happy adulting! Household Skills:

How to unclog a toilet without a plunger

How to fix a blown fuse

How to fix a leaky faucet 

How to clean soap scum from your tub and shower

How to escape from a house fire

How to make a budget and stick to it

How to sharpen a knife

How to clean a self-cleaning oven

How to clean red wine stains from carpet

How to clean blood stains from fabric

How to clean grease stains from fabric

How to do a load of laundry

How to iron your clothes

How to test your smoke detectors

Cooking Skills:

How to tell if produce is ripe

How to know if food is expired 

How to properly sanitize a kitchen

How to cook an egg

How to make rice

How to make pasta

How to put out a kitchen grease fire safely

How to use a gas stove

How to use a convection oven

How to cook meat safely

How to use a stand mixer

How to use kitchen knives properly

How to make mashed potatoes

How to make grilled cheese sandwiches 

Health Skills:

How to stop bleeding

How to treat a burn 

How to do CPR (on an adult)

How to do CPR (on a child)

How to do CPR (on a baby)

How to help someone who is choking

How to save yourself if you are choking alone

How to read a nutrition label

How to treat frostbite

How to recognize when someone is having a stroke

How to maintain a healthy sleep schedule

Mental Health Skills:

How to calm down during a panic attack

How to help someone who is suicidal 

How to meditate 

How to stop self-harming

How to recognize problem drinking

How to choose a therapist

How to deal with disappointment

How to cope with grief

How to raise your self-esteem

Relationship and Social Skills:

How to apologize

How to cope with a breakup 

How to accept criticism 

How to deal with bullying 

How to argue in a healthy way

How to ask someone out

How to break up with someone

How to recognize an abusive relationship

How to rekindle a damaged friendship

How to speak in public

Job Hunting Skills:

How to tie a tie

How to write a resume

How to write a cover letter

How to dress for a job interview (for women/femmes)

How to dress for a job interview (for men/masculines)

How to properly shake hands

How to nail a job interview

Other Skills:

How to sew on a button 

How to hammer a nail

How to change your oil

How to put gas in your car

How to jump-start a car

How to pick a good password

How to back up your files

How to write a cheque

[imovedimovedimovedimoved-deacti]

Do any of you know about that one painting with Aphrodite being born out of lava with a black swan by her side or did i completely hallucinate that? Been searching for a while but i can’t find it for shit.

[thecavenest]

I tried googling that description but no luck either, anyone might know what painting this might be (or if it does exist? cause it sounds sick lol)

[semicolonthefifth]

It took a bit of googling magic, but I think I’ve found it.

This is “Kindled” by Laura K. Cannon, which is part of her portfolio that can be found here: http://navate.com/2wk6im1sartc92iwza7il07bxq2mk5

Is this what you were looking for? @sakyubaso

[tiffanygladiator]

I’m in love.

[w0wls]

Dont forget to take your swan ashen one

[theskyeisthelimit]

Always reblog this badass painting whenever I see it

[alderhasfaith-deactivated201905]

Holy shit new fav.

[omgthatdress]

Putting these up for anyone who needs them today.

Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life by Susan Forward

Why Does he DO That: Inside The Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft

[superopinionated]

Cannot recommend WDHDT highly enough. I’ve found it helpful not just for romantic relationships, but also for growing up w a “unexplainable/uncontrollable” dad.

IT HAS ALSO BEEN REALLY HELPFUL FOR UNDERSTANDING ONLINE MOB HARASSMENT.

So if you’ve ever been bombarded w threats to be raped/killed, (so…if you’re a minority and you’ve been on the Internet for a while), this book might be useful for getting clarity around the whole entitled, abusive mindset that drives certain kinds of people to behave that way. And by “getting clarity”, I mean (for me) being able to go “oh, that’s what’s happening” and not really feel scared anymore. Or angry, or drawn out into it, or anything.

And if you’re still standing around going “but how does something like GamerGate happen?” or “but why do men hit their wives?” or whatever – please read that book and learn something.

[omgthatdress]

^^^^ truth WDHDT is fantastic at cutting down MRA bullshit and calling it what it really is

[kithnkin]

Also recommending

[swampseer]

Please consider reading these. WDHDT is really, really helpful. And I know some of you are struggling with abusive relationships, friendships, families, etc. You’re not alone. There is help.

[heysawbones]

Yo. This family holiday, please, please take care of yourself. You aren’t there to be anybody else’s cushion.

[robotsandfrippary]

Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents

Reading any of these books does not mean you don’t love your parents or family.  It’s just self care for helping you cope and not repeat the behaviors. 

[anna-mator]

A gentle reminder that I have Toxic Parents as a FREE PDF if you would like to download it and read it on your own. Take care of yourselves.

[heavyweightheart]

All the books in this thread are great; adding this one because it was the most helpful to me. Free pdf here

[goosewithajob]

If anyone tries to tell you that Shakespeare is stuffy or boring or highbrow, just remember that the word “nothing” was used in Elizabethan era slang as a euphemism for “vagina”. 

Shakespeare has a play called “Much Ado About Nothing”, which you could basically read in modern slang as “Freaking Out Over Pussy”. And that’s pretty much exactly what happens in the play. 

[kiralamouse]

It’s also a pun with a third meaning. There’s the sex sense of much ado about “nothing”, there’s the obvious sense that people today see, and then there’s the fact that in Shakespeare’s day, “nothing” was pronounced pretty much the same as “noting”, which was a term used for gossip. So, “Flamewar Over Rumors” works as a title interpretation, too.

The reason we call Shakespeare a genius is that he can make a pussy joke in the same exact words he uses to make biting social commentary about letting unverified gossip take over the discourse.

[copperbadge]

So like.

A truly accurate modern translation would be “I Cunt Believe He Said That”?

[strangeselkie]

@copperbadge YOU GO AND SIT AMONG THE MUSTARDS  AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU’VE DONE

[copperbadge]

I truly feel the ghost of Shakespeare has never been more proud of me. 

[caffeinewitchcraft]

I feel Shakespeare’s approval in this chili’s tonight

[lightleckrereins]

Reblogging again because in spanish Much Ado About Nothing is called Mucho ruido y pocas nueces which can mean saying a lot of things without saying anything but also translates to ‘a lot of noise and small nuts’ so.

[ithelpstodream]

Some guy just mansplained space to an actual fucking astronaut.

[clownsauce-deactivated20230729]

tfw correcting misinformation is written off as mansplaining

[darwinquark]

tfw when idiots on tumblr who know jack shit about thermo assume the dude is ‘correcting misinformation’ when actually he’s dead ass wrong. ‘Spontaneous’ is a scientific term - it means a reaction with a negative Gibb’s free energy, i.e. a reaction that will occur without an external energy input, i.e. water boiling because of low atmospheric pressure. Spontaneous is absolutely the correct term for what she’s observing, and that is ‘simple thermo’, and this is ‘correcting misinformation’.

Have a nice day.

[waitinghopingliving]

[hollowboobtheory]

imagine hearing “hall of the mountian king” for the first time in 1875. the sheer chaos imagine being some norwegian aristocrat and sitting down for a nice day at the symphony and getting your entire wig and life snatched right before your very eyes

[hollowboobtheory]

i’m just saying grieg went tf off!

[princesspinch]

It’s officially spooky season p.2

[jojincitow-deactivated20210627]

Breathe!

[xylax]

I assume the roots are moving with the trees due to wind but dang that looks like a cool effect

[betthearm]

Yeah, it is super easy to understand why ancient folk believed in monsters, spirits, and the like, because nature is ducking weird.

[toinfinityandbeyonce-deactivate]

“Birds evolved from dinosaurs.” While this statement is technically true it isn’t very useful and thus is a misconception of the relationship among avian, dinosaurs, and reptiles. Not only did birds evolve from dinosaurs — birds ARE dinosaurs.

[foreverdreamsofnever]

[lame-and-corny-blog]

[goldensweetcheeks-deactivated20]

COME ON NA OBAMA! 👏🏾

[onlyblackgirl]

He ain’t wearing a jacket no more and he got his sleeves rolled up. My nigga is over it.

[mamaoceanaa-deactivated20200720]

Ooh & you can tell he’s ready to curse. Gods above do I miss the Obamas

[autogynephiladelphia]

“h-h-heck” Obama you can say fuck

[cincosechzehn-deactivated201901]

LET BARACK OBAMA SAY FUCK

[darkfrog24]

The trill in his voice for “Congress isn’t even in session.”

[dan-mcneely-deactivated20210328]

going thru phone pics and found this thing that was tacked up next to the toaster at my old job, if anyone needs some light toast eating reading material

[selfcarepropaganda]

Would anyone be kind enough to transcribe this or link to a text version?

[anxiety-depression-recovery]

Everything Is AWFUL and I’m Not Okay: Questions to Ask Before Giving Up on Yourself

Are you hydrated? 

If not, have a glass of water. Dehydration can mimic or increase feelings associated with anxiety and a well hydrated brain functions optimally. Avoid excess caffeine. 

Have you eaten in the past three hours? 

Don’t be a victim of hanger! Get some food–something with protein, not just simple carbs or high-fat. Nuts, hummus, and veggies are great options to feed your studying brain. Keep healthy snacks within reach to avoid mindlessly chowing down on sweets. 

Have you stretched your legs in the past day? 

If not, do so right now. If you don’t have the energy or time for a run or a trip to the gym, just walk around the block or building. Even minimal exercise preps the mind for learning so that you can focus better and recall things easier, plus it’s good to get a change of scenery. 

Have you said something nice to someone in the past day? 

Do so, whether online or in person. Make it genuine! We bet your study partner would appreciate a compliment. 

Have you moved your body to music in the past day?

If not, jog for the length of a song at your favorite tempo, or just dance around your bedroom for the length of an upbeat song (singing along is a bonus) 

Have you cuddled a living being in the past two days?

If not, do so. Don’t be afraid to ask for hugs from friends of friends’ pets. Most of them will enjoy the cuddles too; you’re not imposing. 

Have you started or changed any medications in the past couple of weeks, including skipped doses or a change in generic prescription brand? 

That may be screwing with your head. Give things a few days, then talk to your doctor if it doesn’t settle down. 

If daytime: are you dressed? 

If no, put on clean clothes that aren’t PJs. Give yourself permission to wear something special, whether it’s a funny t-shirt or a pretty dress. 

If nighttime: are you sleepy and fatigued but resisting going to sleep? 

Put on PJs, make yourself cozy in bed with a teddy bear and the sound of falling rain, and close your eyes for fifteen minutes while focusing on breathing deeper with every breath- no electronic screens allowed! Adequate sleep is a necessity for stress management. 

Do you feel ineffective? 

Pause right now and get something small completed, whether it’s responding to an email, loading the dishwasher, or tidying up your room. Good job!

Do you feel unattractive? 

Take a darn selfie. Your friends will remind you how great you look. You are always insta-worthy. 

Do you feel paralyzed by indecision?

Give yourself ten minutes to sit back and figure out a game plan for the day. If a particular decision or problem is still being a roadblock, simply set it aside for now, and pick something else that seems doable. Right now, the important part is to break through that stasis, even if it means doing something trivial. 

Have you over-exerted yourself lately–physically, emotionally, socially, or intellectually? 

That can take a toll that lingers for days. Give yourself a break in that area, whether it’s physical rest, taking some time alone, or relaxing with some silly entertainment for a little. Time spent refreshing yourself is never time “wasted!” 

Have you waited a week? 

Sometimes or perception of life is skewed, and we can’t even tell that we’re not thinking clearly, and there’s no obvious external cause. It happens. Keep yourself going for a full week, whatever it takes, and see if you still feel the same way then. 

You’ve made it this far; and you will make it through. You are stronger than you think.

[crayyola-deactivated20220827]

What people think adhd/add/autism is like: lol im so random XD look a squirrel! I am soft and docile

What its actually like:

“Im bored, lets rip my fingers off”

**happy rocking**

I NEED TO STEP ON THIS LEAF OR I WILL DIE

“Have you heard of (niche special interest)? Well- **infodumps**”

“Why are you rocking? ” “why arent you?”

T i r e d

Hoo golly here comes the Depression™

“Could you repeat that please?”/“what”/“huh”

HhhoooHHH CRUNCHY

Those weird ass invasive thoughts that make u go :/ at ur brain

Not being able to eat

“Why am i thirsty? I had a full one drop of water three weeks ago”

[catbushandludicrous]

[graceebooks]

OH MY GOD

[theseaisalesbian]

It’s back

[stevviefox]

Sure, why not!

[firbolging]

the pride and prejudice musical we deserve:

darcy doesn’t sing a single note even during conversations where everyone else is singing at him that is until the argument following his first attempt at proposing to lizzy where you can see his restraint fall away

his first big solo is the letter he writes her

gelsey bell is mary and the unofficial narrator and she sits down at her piano to describe whats going on but before she can ever reveal her feelings on the matter, starting with that gelsey bell scream, mr bennet comes over and does the whole ‘that’s nice dear but give someone else a turn’

mr wickham has this huge ballad about how darcy ruined his life and its super melodramatic and touching

mr collins proposal to lizzy is an absolute bop that he gets so into he forgets for a moment what he’s doing he’s just owning the stage

wickham has a song where he’s trying to seduce lydia but she’s not even listening she’s just monologuing about how excited she is to get laid

during darcy’s second proposal he keeps hesitating waiting for lizzy to interrupt him like she has done every time before but she doesn’t say anything until he’s finished

at the end mary sits down at the piano and right where she’d usually be interrupted, kitty joins her and harmonises

 jane and bingley have the adorable upbeat romantic duet which is just them being super polite like ‘oh so nice to have you here’ ‘so nice to be here’ interspersed with their inner monologue which is just them being like fucking jesus I’m so in love

the bingley sisters probably have a really cool mean solo

lady catherine has this terrifying disney villain song in the garden

there’s for sure a song about ribbon shopping

[liberaleffects]

[repair-bear]

Okay but cross-stitching is literally just acoustic pixel art and you can’t convince me otherwise

[elodieunderglass]

I’ll consider this, OP, because I’m open-minded, but I suspect this is a cursèd revelation

[emilysidhe]

Pixel art is just a cross-stitch pattern

[naamahdarling]

“Acoustic pixel art” dear god. *crawls back into bed*

[alwaysbewoke]

these are the days i remember why i love the internet hahaha 

[marlbororeds100s-deactivated202]

in case u wanna see samuel l jackson’s response