It's very doubtful that he dislikes you. You're mortal. You're not a world leader or politician, right? You're not trying to be his priest or anything. It's honestly really doubtful that you've done anything significant enough to earn dislike from any god.
That said, Apollon is a very intense deity, and it may be that he doesn't want you to get too close, too quickly.
I have seen people absolutely trash a deity's reputation because they had maladaptive learning surrounding the deities domains. They honestly thought the deity hurt them. That message actively hurt the god's cultus.
Trauma is maladaptive learning. It clouds our perceptions. Speaking as someone with PTSD from childhood abuse and neglect, I can tell you that my initial experiences with Zeus, the lovely head of pantheon, Father of Gods and Men, was inaccurate and awful until I worked through the trauma my parents inflicted on me. When I worked through that trauma, I saw him differently.
It is entirely possible for a well-meaning, traumatized person, who is otherwise very careful and clear-thinking, to respond to their hypervigilance instead of material facts, and project aspects of their trauma onto other people, let alone gods, who can be harder to perceive.
When I was younger, when I didn't understand, I confronted the gods, and said, "you can't act that way!"
And they replied, "We cannot control individual people."
And that's true. People who aren't ready to hear a god can get them twisted. I mean, look at Jesus and the Right. That god acts in ways contrary to his mythology because he has actual clergy who are still dealing with trauma inflicted by authoritarian parenting.
Not that I am saying that this is the case with you, but as a general rule, I would advise everyone trying to seek mystic union, and mystical communication with a god (as opposed to exoteric worship) to do a trauma inventory about what they stand for, and about authority in general, including trauma with parents, bosses, clergy, and politicians.
Sometimes you need to become more aware of your triggers before you can navigate your trauma. If a deity is the literal embodiment of stuff that triggers you, and you do not have sufficient coping mechanisms, it can be a recipe for disaster.
If you work through that trauma, and try again, and the answer is still "no," it's probably to preserve your mental stability.
But also, it may not even be Apollon sending you the "no" omens.
It might be that there is another deity in the wings that you should be working with first, or an unacknowledged patron who is looking at your potential chemistry with Apollon, and saying, "nuh uh."
Because, while we think of Dionysos as a god of madness, Apollon kinda is too, in his own way.
If you get a taste of him, you're going to want more. I have watched people get too close, too fast, and because they had a fraught relationship with The Truth, it wrecked them.
And, a few years ago, I would have bucked at that idea.
Until I had a situationship come up with another deity.
Hermes kept saying no. Of course, I read it as possessiveness. As a bid for exclusivity -- like one-sided monogamy. That made no sense, and so I assumed that it was my filter, because why would the most polyamorous deity --save Aphrodite -- say such a thing? Toxic monogamy culture blah blah blah.
I disregarded the message because I assumed it was all filter. I assumed I heard all of it wrong. I had good reasons to assume that it was filter, based on mistreatment from past partners and my parents.
It was the worst three years of my life. It was the right choice, necessary transformation, but the wrong time.
And now, I want to be clear. Hermes wasn't saying "don't make offerings to this deity." He was saying, "do not engage in mystic union with this deity."
I got triggered. I made mistakes because of trauma and self-doubt. I don't regret the overall results, but it could've and should've waited ten years. I didn't mishear.
Deities are more powerful, and thus have duty of care. They have a responsibility to say no if being in mystic union with them will damage you. Your patron has a responsibility to tell you no about another deity, if it's going to hurt you, or your loved ones.
Here is how you can know if that's what's going on:
List out everything Apollon represents to you.
Read his mythology, and compile a list of everything he meant to his ancient cultus.
List out the traumatic experiences you have had, or just the bad ones. How was your relationship with clergy growing up? How was your relationship with your parents? How do you think about authority? What would you do with infinite power if you had it and why?
If you see a strong overlap between stuff the deity stands for and stuff you've had bad experiences of, you need to probably do some healing, ideally with a mental health professional, to learn coping mechanisms for your triggers, and your trauma.
If that is the case, you can still worship Apollon, but maybe add to your prayers a statement of reassurance: "Though I honor you, I do not wish to draw near to your power, because I'm still working on me."
If you're 100% sure you don't have trauma in connection with anything the deity stands for, then the next thing to do is an inventory of your fears about how relationships with a deity, any deity, could go wrong. Fear is an important message to you from yourself. You don't fear things, generally speaking, if you don't think of them as a credible threat to your wellbeing. Beliefs can be a powerful thing, especially when exposed to even ambient divine power.
It could be that you on some level know something and are sending yourself a message. It might be, "right idea, wrong time."
But don't let other humans tell you who to worship and not. You know better than anyone what's working for you and what not. Just commit to being self aware, and making certain you know your limits, and set your boundaries well.
