just your friendly neighbourhood lizard person

Basically anything and everything

[metamorphesque]

don't look at me with those brown eyes or I might just spend the rest of my life keeping your hands warm

[thegothempress]

bro i hate those mfs who are like “your favorite slasher would actually kill you” ummm no i’m built different. he would never do that to me.

[dumdumdiddle]

[umbrelllaklaus]

[shadio]

every time i open this app i read some dumb ass shit

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

And every time we kiss I swear I can fly

[cryptidfuckery]

Women hot, ABBA good

[mentholluver1234]

Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again (2018)

[darcybeth]

agent: hey colin how would you like to be in this movie?

colin firth: am i going to get wet again?

agent: what? no you don’t ha-

colin firth, already chest deep in a lake: fine, if you insist i’ll do it

[gostaks]

evidence that I actually live in a video game

I always wear the same clothing

idle animation

awkward dialog

sometimes I get stuck on doors and have to back up and try again

yesterday I tried to stand up and my entire body stopped working and I ended up in a T-pose on the floor

[theladygodieva]

I approach people and repeat conversations I already had with them. More than once. 

[sunegami]

sometimes I enter a room then immediately leave again

[helila]

if you talk to me long enough, i will run out of dialogue lines and start repeating old ones

[twentykatie]

*Adam leaves*

me:

[followthebluebell]

adulthood is just a constant struggle of, “man, i want cookies for breakfast, but I also recognize this is a bad nutritional decision.  On the other hand, the only one who can stop me is me.  i know that fucker’s weaknesses.  i could totally take me in a fight.”

[dreamingofbabylon]

frog and toad are my two remaining brain cells struggling to keep my horrible body alive

[hotcommunist-deactivated2019032]

“beauty is pain” is perhaps the cruelest phrase we teach young girls imo

[peterrtork-deactivated20190910]

not to be nsfw but when rami said “this is for and because of you, gorgeous” my heart was full of love

[ang3leyes]

Real talk time, Rami’s genuine love and respect for Freddie Mercury is 100% why he deserves this Golden Globe. He brought to life an icon in a way that was respectful and yet personal and honest. He was the best person to have possibly played that role, and I’m so grateful for the amount of dignity and grace he brought to Freddie’s name, both in the film and after it. 

[goldensweetcheeks-deactivated20]

It do be like that tho.

[wereralph]

people dont think it be like it is but it do

[dankmemeuniversity]

[johnnyjoestarrelatable]

short girls seeing the “if you want jeans with pockets, just shop in the men’s department!” post

[e-girlinterrupted-deactivated20]

me w/ my new mens pants

[enfjvenus]

today’s tea

[arousedhoe]

hey does anyone know the fastest way to clean up milk that’s covering every goddamn i nch of the  kitchen floor

[slightmood]

i know a gal……she’s on her way

[arousedhoe]

thanks

[slightmood]