escaping panopticon @yengyengyeng - Tumblr Blog

Wanna come over ?

Ned will be the first to remember Peter. Peter will just happen to come across Ned one day and as they both reach out to shake hands, they do their handshake. It’s muscle memory for them, and that will trigger Ned to remember Peter.

seek--rest

posted December 2021 btw. op where is your check from marvel

seek--rest

sorry I’m still stuck on living in a reality where May Parker is unequivocally the center of Peter Parker’s entire life and that her lessons, her life, her love are still so transformative that it was able to encompass time and distance and literal reality and change the life of one of the most powerful beings in existence who is also a teenage girl. like do you understand how meaningful this is to me. DO YOU.

May Parker’s Enduring Legacy bitches!!!!!!

mina-logan

“Shane, how does it feel to be back on Montreal ice?”

tears-of-acid-and-sluts

Hey so Peter witnessing how much the world loves him after being hated and betrayed in the past, is so important to me.

godmotherpm

The craziest thing about this whole situation is that Ilya thinks in Russian and in Russian ‘lovers’ LITTERAL TRANSLATION is ‘возлюбленные’. Which ACTUALLY MEANS ‘people who feel love and attraction towards each other’. MY BOY WAS CONFESSING HIS LOVE TO SHANE AND LOST IN TRANSLATION GAME. HE WAS SO PURE ABOUT IT AND ONLY GOT ‘No, Ilya, that’s gross’. MY SWEET LOVERBOY.

cardiacanes

as a joke (not a joke) ilya writes an S on his stick tape during his first season with the centaurs (he was teasing shane about writing yuna on his stick tape). and when shane joins the centaurs they're sitting together taping their sticks, passing the scissors and sharpies back and forth and when ilya looks over he sees that shane wrote yuna on one side and ilyushka on the other. so naturally he grabs the sharpie back and changes his S into S H A N E.

wlwarhammer

A lot of people ignore the absolutely radioactive levels of frat boy coming from Shane Hollander because it’s inconvenient to their hyper feminized bottom stereotyping

penandinkprincess

it is just endlessly so funny to me that a central issue in the tuna meltdown is that ilya is trying to account for shane's moves in a game of 3d chess and meanwhile shane is just desperately trying to play tic tac toe

ilya is layering his questions in like four layers of misdirect while still trying to get the answers he wants and then shane is just asking "you want me to stay?" "you want to make me food?" "do you have a girlfriend?"

ilya is out here coming up with his riddles three to see if he can cross over the becoming a boyfriend bridge, and he could have ACTUALLY DONE IT if he'd been able to ask "hey, do you want to be exclusive and not just fuck buddies?"

man was out here writing a novel when a one sentence survey question would have actually achieved his goal

gaynehollander

The very first time Ilya visited the hookup apartment he smoked a cigarette on the balcony and used an empty soda can as an ashtray, dropping the stub in it once he'd finished. After he left, Shane spent over 10 minutes shaking the can upside down trying to get the stub out, very nearly crying out of frustration when it just kept rattling around in there, because he couldn't recycle the can with a cigarette stub in it. He ended up having to rinse out the can and the smell of the cigarette ash mixing with the water was absolutely vile, not to mention that when the stub finally rushed out of the can it was wet and mushy and so gross that Shane had to put on gloves to pick it up and throw it in the trash, which he then took out immediately to try and save the whole apartment from reeking of stale cigarettes.

Which is why, the second time Ilya visited the hookup apartment, Shane had bought an ashtray.

outtagum

SPIDER-MAN: BRAND NEW DAY dir. Destin Daniel Cretton (2026)

allykittens

Never ever disparage Hudson Williams's acting to me. I *saw* Shane's soul leave his body when Ilya was half a second away from explaining "fuckbuddies" to his parents. Shane was on another plane of existence, watching the conversation play out from above. Hudson said fewer than five words across that entire exchange and I felt it in my BONES.

caralikesgay

ok this is mostly a collection of ilya "good top" rozanov headcanons that took on a life of their own

ilya's reputation as a "womanizer" and a "ladies man" takes hold pretty early in his career

he's got a girl in every port, the man's having a lot of sex everywhere

(most of his teammates know that he's got a special fondness for jane in montreal, but that's neither here nor there)

shane genuinely isn't jealous, what ilya does when they're apart isn't his business, as long as he has ilya's undivided attention when they're together, which he absolutely does

someone makes a joke on twitter that all of the women he's banged ought to start a club

this leads to someone making a shirt that says "i hooked up with ilya rozanov and all i got was this lousy t-shirt" and starts selling it on etsy. a bunch of other people make copycat shirts and variations

the fad fades pretty quickly, but there's a brief moment in time where they seem to be everywhere, and jane texts lily every time he sees someone wearing one out in the wild

lily mostly responds with laughing emoji, but one time he responds with "i think that one's real i remember her" and shane has to remind himself that he's not jealous and it's not his business and he has to delete the picture so he doesn't go back and study it

not long after boston wins the cup, a package arrives at shane's secret sex condo, it's a version of the shirt that says "i slept with STANLEY CUP WINNER ilya rozanov and all i got was this lousy t-shirt"

shane is mortified, but also more than a little turned on. at some point he wears it under his other clothes when he meets up with ilya for a hook-up and ilya goes absolutely feral when he sees it

years later, when the whole dallas kent situation hits the fan, people start taking to twitter talking shit about other NHL players (and other pro-athletes in general) who treated them poorly

someone tweets out "i've never really talked about this because i'm not one to kiss and tell and it's really no one's business, but i just want to say that in like 2014 i hooked up with ilya rozanov and he was the most considerate lover i'd ever had. i was relatively inexperienced and so down bad for him that i would have done anything he said, but he checked in with me every step of the way, and *also* gave me crazy orgasms to boot"

and women start coming out of the woodwork responding to the thread with similar sentiments, that he'd set the bar for future hookups and relationships

and people are like "damn, consent king ilya rozanov, didn't have that on my bingo card this year" and "this man was really fucking his way across north america as a service to *us* teaching millennial women to have higher standards for their partners"

someone tweets out "i hooked up with ilya rozanov and all i got was multiple orgasms and really high expectations about consent" and it goes stupid viral

several months later when the fanmail debacle happens and hollanov are outed, that particular corner of social media has another meltdown along the lines of "and he's even bisexual? this makes so much sense"

someone jokes about getting shane a shirt, since he's a member of the club, this tweet makes its way back to harris, who feels like he should warn shane and ilya

ilya posts a picture to instagram of his husband lounging, wearing The Shirt, his underwear, and nothing else. the shirt is very obviously not new, has been worn and washed many times

in the picture, shane's left hand is draped casually across his stomach, wedding ring glinting in the light, as if to remind everyone: this one's mine