Attack Penicillin!

We are going to fucking kill you Cold (occasionally warm)

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Got high and listened to Daft Punk and I’ve never had a more surreal experience

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Yall remember that game ‘cut fruit’ or something?

And then everyone clapped.

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Houses team with a new patient trying to figure out the symptoms of a dying man:

Cameron: maybe it’s Sarcoidosis

Foreman: or Lupus

Chase: guys do you think I’m a boyish little gay boy :(

[alisscared]

Fanfiction isn’t enough, I need that old man

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Is this literally me hello my two favourite old men are Stanford Pines and Gregory house

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What’s up with everything weird being considered ‘weird’ like guys, cmon let’s be weird it’s fun wahoo!!

[foone]

PSA:

1. If you are not silly, it is vital you become silly

2. If you are silly, you must stay silly

2. If you used to be silly but have stopped, you must make all efforts to return to silliness

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Classic reaction to the end of house MD

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Gregory house and James Wilson would have taken the most loser clubs in high school.

House would have improv club on Mondays, chess club at lunch on Tuesdays and Thursdays and would fucking yo-yo in his free time

Wilson would take a ‘do good for the world’ club whenever he could. Bro would be in the sustainability club, kindness club and he would volunteer at an old folks home. He’d hate every second but he wanted to be seen as a good person so he would do it and never skip.

They would be losers in highschool and no one can tell me otherwise

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Dude I was having a great Wednesday, I really sparkled that day, and remembered who I was, and then the next morning?? Woke up, my sparkle turned off and I completely forgot who I was. I don’t know what happened but I did see a faint shadow of a tall pickly man holding a cane in the corner of my room as I woke up.

Thursdays, am I right??

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I wanna see Gregory house do like, the most normal tasks, like going to the grocery store.

House at the Grocery store (headcannon):

Gregory house sees grocery shopping as one of the worst things, as he has better things to do. he doesn’t make a grocery list, but uses the same one he made the first time he moved out, and he memorized it. It’s the most basic university student grocery list out there. For fruits and veggies he eats the pre frozen veggie mix and slurps fruit cups like it’s nobody’s business. He eats the same thing every day unless Wilson makes him something else. He walks down the aisle at a slow/moderate pace as he uses that time to think about everything, his diagnosis, his life, and of course, Wilson. He does not look at ANYONE, even the cashier who he might glance up at and say a slight ‘hi’. He doesn’t want to talk. The only time he will buy something new is if it seems interesting, like if there was a new flavour Oreo or something. He would probably shop at a Costco or something so that he can buy the few items he wants in large quantities so he doesn’t have to shop very much.

Wilson, on the other hand, pre-plans his meals going into the week, by looking up recipes or by just judgment on what he likes. He would think of grocery shopping as a weekly event and he would look up through the aisles scanning for random ingredients. He also buys things that he knows house likes, like certain flavours of chips, so house can eat happily at his house (also to tempt house to come over more). If the store does not have an ingredient he needs for a recipe, he would not be shy to go ask a worker. He also prefers organic, and to shop locally

What a great idea for fanficton and art

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Now I know Hugh Laurie is a great physical comedian and musician and he can play so many instruments, sing, and even fucking juggle and he does all of that in house, but… when the hell did house learn to juggle so well.

Does house seem like the juggling type guy?? Or on his off time he plays the guitar and piano and organ and hermonica?? I want to know the house lore to why tf he juggles. Who tf juggles in their free time

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My friend is attending Princeton next year so I told him to say hello to Gregory house for me

[shadow-von-vamp]

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The vocabulary of the House MD team in 2024 would be so horrible most people would much rather perish then have to be treated by them:

Chase would agree with a diagnosis with a simple ‘real’. He would speak like an average gen z white boy that almost makes no sense

Thirteen would say the words ‘slay’ and ‘queen’ and ‘period’ more than she says yes and no

Foreman would talk like a responsible adult but is catching a bit of the ‘bro’ case

Kutner would only use gamer lingo, such as ‘pog, shit on, W, L, bussin, popping off’ and would sound like a complete loser

House would Skibbity toilet sigma rizz

Taub would think he’s going fucking insane because he has no idea what anyone is saying

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Here’s what would happen if you were to ask Chase what his pronouns are:

Chase: my pronaurns? Awr naur, we dornt ave those in Aurstrailia, we just ave the ‘Roos and sawmtimes snakes. You Amairicans are too ghay. Also iam from aurstrailia.

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Can we take a moment to appreciate and celebrate Steve McQueen and his honorary sacrifice to a gay lunatic docto who probably eats Wilson’s ass?

Rest in peace little bro 👊😔

[75screamingtoads]

House in 2024

House: faggot

Foreman: I.. don't think you should be saying that

Chase: arh naur I theenk he carn archally. Ave you seenim with Wilson?

Cameron: I think it's a little rude to speculate about someone's sexuality while they're in the room

House: oh no no, let Chase continue. I wanna know when he'll start describing how I take in in the ass-

*house realizes something*

House: WE HAVE TO CHECK THE PATIENTS ASS