Something I have realized after being diagnosed with autism is that I am never going to fit in with my peers. But what was even harder to accept was that I already didn’t.
When I was diagnosed in December, I felt like I was an outsider in my own community. I hadn’t been diagnosed early enough to fit in with those who were, but I also was diagnosed too early to fit in with those diagnosed in adulthood. I felt trapped and like I had lost a part of myself that I had never known existed.
Through my research of Autism Spectrum Disorder, I stumbled across a lot of influencers who were classified as late-diagnosed autistic. And for some reason, I felt like I could finally relate to somebody. But, these people were all adults? How could I possibly understand that?
Well, in an effort to find out if I fall under the umbrella of late-diagnosed autism, I found that anyone who is diagnosed at the age of 12 or older is considered late-diagnosed.
It felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders. I finally understood why I was struggling so much and it made my struggles with mental health finally add up.
But then, I started to notice a lot more of the things people say about autism.
“____ is a little acoustic”
After hearing these things for weeks, I finally had enough. I shared a TikTok to my Instagram story. I didn’t think much of any negative feedback I would receive, and most people were incredibly supportive of me speaking out about something important to me.
But of course, I knew that not everyone would be this kind. The next day, I was sitting in my fifth period. I overheard a conversation between two girls. One of these girls I had already had problems with. I overheard them mocking my story, using my exact words.
I felt so angry, and I kindly asked my teacher to let me sit in the hallway.
I think this was the day I finally realized that some people aren’t willing to admit when they’re wrong. And to add salt to the wound, they used my words against me to make some kind of joke.
After that, I knew I had to do more.
I hope I can spread more information about ASD and decrease the stigma surrounding it. Because some of the smartest people in history could have very well been autistic, and being autistic doesn’t make you stupid.
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