Thereâs something intensely unhealthy going on when parents discourage age-appropriate independence. A 13 year old should probably be allowed to go see a film with their friends most of the time. A 16 year old should probably be allowed to drive/ride a bus/bike to a friendâs house most of the time. An 18 year old should probably be allowed to travel overnight with their friends most of the time. A 20+ year old should be allowed to come and go as they please, with some common-sense âLetâs talk this âmove to Finlandâ plan of your over before you follow through on itâ exceptions.
Parents should want their children to enjoy going out and doing things on their own and with their friends. They should be delighted that their child wants to have a life of their own. A rich, fulfilling life outside the home and distinct from parents and family is important, and parents should want their child to have that.
Today on âI think a white person wrote thisâ
UmmâŚNo. this isnât a âwhite personâ issue. Iâm Black & EVERYTHING she just described in the post is 100% relevant. We gotta stop writing off discussions about unhealthy & overly strict parenting as âwhite people shitâ. Itâs so old and tired. đ
Parents need to give children space to discover who they are and give them certain independence because one day theyâll be on their own, and they need to know how to solve issues and move through life. Overprotection is as damaging to a child as neglecting them.
