every post I make is genius
and every day I jork my weenius
everybody wants to rule the world

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@yurifolder
every post I make is genius
and every day I jork my weenius
everybody wants to rule the world
follow my bluesky where i perform important data analysis:
here's the 3rd post's results if you're curious (where each pokemon's post count is normalized against the popularity of the game generation it's from)
observing the project hail mary fanbase from a distance ive enjoyed the gradual shift on my dashboard from "its so nice to have a movie about friendship with no romantic subplots" to "okay so thats still true but also ryan gosling is fucking that rock puppet crazy style."
what world do people imagine their fursonae exist inside of. I love how undefined it is. some people are like "this is my sona Hryàxe, a hybrid dragon with ice powers who has been alive through three astral ages and toppled many kingdoms of men" and someone else is like "this is my sona he's an arctic fox named blurt and hes a barista in Toronto who loves to play mahjong." And then blurt and hryàxe are lovingly having sex on a tropical beach somewhere. and I'm like how'd they get to the beach
okay well when you say it like that it makes it sound stupid
The Lovers by Jef Joseph Marie Thomas Lambeaux (1852-1908)
À gorge déployée, autoportraits, avril 2026.
Avec paikan.c
Photography by Tom Berge (tom_berge)
@pinkcowie
Computer show me men in agonizing pain crying and writhing on the ground with very obvious hard ons
You know that weird phase where you are not asleep yet but your mind starts doing whatever and you can't really control it? Yeah.
*taking the gun out of my mouth and leaving an uncomfortably erotic trail of saliva* wait i just had a great idea
@pinkcowie
They say ooooh be a good boy for daddy and you'll get a reward. But then the reward is just gay sex. This is bullshit. I wanted a skateboard
Then they say if you're a bad boy daddy will punish you. But what's the punishment? More gay sex! You can't escape it. This whole damn place is in the pocket of Big Sex
This is what it feels like to know the top in a popular ship is actually the bottom
I DON'T CARE IF THEY'RE TALLER!!!!!! I DON'T CARE IF THEY'RE FUCKING TALLER!!!!!
This is what it feels like to know the top in a popular ship is actually the bottom
I DON'T CARE IF THEY'RE TALLER!!!!!! I DON'T CARE IF THEY'RE FUCKING TALLER!!!!!
rating places for a vampire to bite me based on my knowledge of the human vascular system
Neck
10/10
a classic
likely fatal depending on vampire’s aim bc of the super juicy extra tastey jugular vein and carotid artery but go big or go home am i right?
BUT this is also most of the bloodflow to the brain so it will feel like getting choked out which is fun and spicy
decently horny, could be tender or devoted, requires the vampire to hold me close
Inside of Thigh
13/10
H O R N Y
also probably fatal bc of the femoral artery and bc i would die if anyone had their head between my legs
very soft and biteable flesh also perfect for kisses and hickeys before the main event
biting could occur very conveniently before, during or after oral sex and who doesnt love efficiency?
Wrist
8/10
a convenient spot, like a juice box or a kool aid jammer
nice and distal, not likely to be fatal but unfortunately there will be a lot of bones and tendons in the way (unless vampires like to crunch?)
easy to get to on multiple occasions rather than one big deadly ordeal
chaste while still appropriately intimate, not a lot of blood flow but still worthwhile especially for easy cleanup
chest/breast
5/10
this one is only saved by its horny energy
flesh on top of the ribcage isnt highly vascularized and not guaranteed to be soft
weak bloodflow, difficult for the vampire to find purchase, all around not the best for feeding
saved only by the imagery of leaving bites over ones heart or sheer eroticism and could be totally ruined by Freud in a matter of moments
lip
3/10
not a good spot for feeding
provides the quality aesthetic of a bleeding, kiss bruised lip
guarantees that i get to smooch the vampire
easily overshadowed by every other spot on this list
more of an appetizer or a side dish than a main course
@cjsees
a vampire's long term fwbb (friend with blood benefits) making an idle remark about how it was a struggle to handle the aphrodisiac in the bite venom for the first while but now they're used to it and know to expect it and the vampire saying "hey um. so I don't have any bite venom. like at all."
@ablackswansweet
it's really awesome that an option w/ phallophasty is to have a button you click to get hard. go go gadget boner
Communication is key