fartass volfgangus

I'm Zamalie. | Adult | They/He | I just do whatever on here

[caesarsaladinn]

the medieval peasant is a sort of mythological archetype that mostly exists to win arguments about the problems with modern society

[caesarsaladinn]

a very, very rough sketch but you see my general point

[clytemnestraaa]

one of my creative writing professors once said that to evaluate a work as good or not, first you ask what the work is attempting to do, and then you evaluate how well it does it. and this is how to judge everything from critical essays to romance novels to snack packaging to theory tracts.

[pnglove]

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[merrikatwood-deactivated2026021]

it’s because you’re always living in that damn castle

[ninanation]

Come to think of it, it really is insane that my entire country is burning alive and literally no one in the rest of the world cares. Thousands of Indians are dying every day from the heat, it's 45+ degrees in multiple areas, the government couldn't give two fucks, we're getting severe warnings and red alerts, and not a soul outside of South Asia is speaking about it because why would you ever care about brown people

[ninanation]

please keep talking about how Becky from Maryland doesn't like the rising gas prices. It's clearly the more pressing issue.

[roadhogsbigbelly]

it's kinda of insane how accurate this post is

[evvergreen]

tumblr is the website for if you're just someone's weird sister

[thecryptkeeper]

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

[bramblepatch]

A lot of people on this site aren't going to want to hear this but a lot of the time an argument between two trans people with different lived experiences isn't transandrophobia or transmisogyny it's just two combative dumbasses squaring up like turkeys who have just seen their reflection in a hubcap.

[sharp-tender-shock-deactivated2]

This is a comment someone appended to a photo of two men apparently having sex in a very fancy room, but it’s also kind of an amazing two-line poem? “His Wife has filled his house with chintz” is a really elegant and beautiful counterbalancing of h, f, and s sounds, and “chintz” is a perfect word choice here—sonically pleasing and good at evoking nouveau riche tackiness. And then “to keep it real I fuck him on the floor” collapses that whole mood with short percussive sounds—but it’s still a perfect iambic pentameter line, robust and a lovely obscene contrast with the chintz in the first line. Well done, tumblr user jjbang8

[footlongdingledong]

thing thats good: yay

thing thats bad: aww

thing that has both genuinely amazing pieces of storytelling and abysmal dogshit slop both happening like entirely interchangably:

[pokemonstadium2]

when i was a child for multiple halloweens in a row my costume of choice was “fancy lady” who was a character i invented who looked like this

[suigintou]

wikipedia editors are like if redditors were monks

[bgm05]

i see that you media addicted louts have filled your tomodachi life islands with video game and movie characters instead of great leftist thinkers

[tref0il]

WHEN ON PERIOD:

do not crash out

your feelings are NOT valid

do not send that text

don't kill yourself. lock in

do not act on negative emotions until at least 2 days have elapsed

[annabelle--cane]

ticks me off kind of unreasonably when people try to facts and logic their way out of common metaphors or thought experiments. "but there's an objectively correct answer to whether the glass is half empty or half full, it depends on how it started" That's The Point Of The Concept, it's about what your assumption is when you see a glass at 50% capacity with no context. "I didn't tie these people to the trolley tracks, it's not my fault, why aren't we looking for the person who did this in the first place?" so what I'm hearing is that you're deciding not to pull the lever because that would make you feel culpable.