@zanythoughts, others, and myself used to host a discussion at various hypno-kink conventions called “Hypnoamory,” where we mulled over some of the emotional, interpersonal, and romantic issues that can arise when exploring a hypno kink or hypnosis fetish with play partners.
We keep saying we should start the discussion up again someday, but in the meantime, here’s our outline from those discussion classes. It doesn’t have concrete answers (Spoiler Alert: there probably aren’t any), but it may help identify some of the common questions and challenges that come up. (Though it’s a couple years old now – if we were to do it again, I’m sure there’s a lot more to add or amend.)
POSSIBLE DISCUSSION TOPICS:
1) Does erotic hypnosis (EH) play change, intensify, or accelerate romantic feelings, attachments, and relationships? More so than a “vanilla” relationship?
· Service-oriented relationship
· The excitement of exploring a new kink
· The excitement of finding a kink play partner
· Emotional and/or erotic dependence
· Differences between Eroticism / Sexual desire / Connection or Rapport / Platonic Love / Romantic Love
2) What unique challenges arise when one, both, or more EH play partners have little or no previous experience in kink relationships? In polyamorous relationships?
· Handling jealousy between multiple subjects and/or subs? Between multiple hypnotists and/or tops?
· Dealing with imbalances in the nature or depth of the play partners’ feelings
3) Any experience or advice on how to best approach new EH explorations when there is an existing significant other or partner involved who is not kinky or is not interested in EH?
· Balancing long-term, established non-kink relationships with an individual’s desire to explore EH
· Setting, respecting, and minding limits and boundaries
· Can emotions be expected to stay within boundaries or follow rules?
4) What special care or considerations should subjects and hypnotists take into account with EH play?
· What is it about trancing that suggests longer-term obedience, attachment, exclusivity, or even addiction?
· How does the dynamic shift if there is a financial element involved? For example, professional hypno dom(me)s or a fin-dom(me)?
5) What different emotional dynamics are at work for the hypnotist?
· Does the hypnotist have any unique or extra responsibilities?
· Are there scenarios in which an erotic hypnotist should actively avoid emotional attachment to the subject?
· Choice of language (addictive, dependent, exclusive)
· Intentional or unintentional misuse of power exchange and how to respond
· Responsibilities (removal of or time-limitations on suggestions, safeties if relationship ends)
6) What different emotional dynamics are at work for the hypnotic subject?
· Does the subject have any unique or extra responsibilities?
· Are there scenarios in which the hypnotic subject should actively avoid emotional attachment to the hypnotist?
· In communicating to the hypnotist crucial information about existing relationships and feelings?
· Safeties if relationship ends
· How the hypnotist’s language style affects them and communicating modifications
· Aftercare required or desired (from either side of the watch)
7) Are there differences if an EH romantic (or non-romantic) relationship occurs online, long-distance, or in person?
