i don't do bad sauce passes
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@zeb-z
top moments of mandalorian and grogu:
-rotta slug rolling in combat
-din djarin telling grogu to heel several times, like a dog
-din dropping salt into that one guys drink purely to be an asshole
-grogu packing a single grav charge into his little travel bag and nothing else
my mandalorian movie take is it feels like I read it on ao3. It’s fun enough, the characters are close enough to in character that I have enough interest, it brings in a side character I enjoy and that appearance alone makes me hyped, din djarin gets his contract mandated multiple head injuries before walking it all off immediately afterwards, everyone comes together at the end #myavengersendgame. but it wasn’t a movie. it could maybe be classified as a four episode arc from the tv show.
any scraps of substance and feeling that actions were consequential that they somehow managed to keep together from s3 are blown away for the sake of hype moments and aura. the razor crest 2.0 is shakily explained away, he gets and keeps a new pulse rifle. and anything new they set up has no weight to it - his reputation as a maverick of a field agent for the new republic is set up and then only ever brought up for the sake of banter. his helmet being forcibly removed (which he puts up NO fight against by the way) does not have any ramifications or crisis of belief because he ends up killing everyone who was in the room. no need to worry about that tedious trip from s3 to the waters of mandalore again, no need to question the specific details of the creed like he might have in s2, when there was still a weight to his actions and the actions of others around him.
the only message that has any weight is given to grogu, about having to accept loss and learn to live with change if time is unfair and takes his father before he’s ready - and it’s immediately undermined by din djarin waking up the morning after from the handy dandy super convenient cure to the deadly poison coursing through his veins. and then he near singlehandedly wipes out the heads of the Hutt empire.
it’s a fic on screen, with self indulgent inserts from Dave Filoni (who you see three times in his hat) and cute and silly moments between din djarin and grogu, with plenty of banter and familiar set dressing. which would be fine if it wasn’t a $165 million blockbuster made to sell us cheap toys and happy meals
Me and my cousin have an ongoing bit where we pretend we made "slightly better" versions of things where we'll be like.
"That was a pretty good movie, but not as good as my movie, House of 1001 Corpses," or "I guess this song is okay. Kind of reminds me of a song I'm working on called 'Faster Car'."
Never once has it been funny or made anyone but us laugh.
This reminds me of a joke I have with two of my cousins
really adored this chapter, it was so sweet :”)
Beldaruit ❤️and easthies…
Colored these guys a lil!!
Legolas pretty quickly gets in the habit of venting about his travelling companions in Elvish, so long as Gandalf & Aragorn aren’t in earshot they’ll never know right?
Then about a week into their journey like
Legolas: *in Elvish, for approximately the 20th time* ugh fucking hobbits, so annoying
Frodo: *also in Elvish, deadpan* yeah we’re the worst
Legolas:
~*~earlier~*~
Legolas: ugh fucking hobbits
Merry: Frodo what’d he say
Frodo: I’m not sure he speaks a weird dialect but I think he’s insulting us. I should tell him I can understand Elvish
Merry: I mean you could do that but consider
Merry: you can only tell him ONCE
Frodo: Merry. You’re absolutely right. I’ll wait.
#legolas’ hick accent vs #frodo’s ‘i learned it out of a book’ accent #FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
Legolas: umm well your accent is horrible
Aragorn: *hollering from a distance* HIS ACCENT IS BETTER THAN YOURS LEGOLAS YOU SILVAN HICK
Frodo: :)
Frodo: Hello. My name is Frodo. I am a Hobbit. How are you?
Legolas: y’alld’ve’ff’ve
Frodo, crying: please I can’t understand what you’r saying
Ok, but Frodo didn’t just learn out of a book. He learned like… Chaucerian Elvish. So actually:
Frodo: Good morrow to thee, frend. I hope we twain shalle bee moste excellente companions.
Legolas: Wots that mate? ‘Ere, you avin’ a giggle? Fookin’ ‘obbits, I sware.
Aragorn: *laughing too hard to walk*
@ghostriderofthearagon
dYinGggGggg…
i mean, honestly it’s amazing the Elves had as many languages and dialects as they did, considering Galadriel (for example) is over seven thousand years old.
english would probably have changed less since Chaucer’s time, if a lot of our cultural leaders from the thirteenth century were still alive and running things.
they’ve had like. seven generations since the sun happened, max. frodo’s books are old to him, but outside any very old poetry copied down exactly, the dialect represented in them isn’t likely to be older than the Second Age, wherein Aragorn’s foster-father Elrond started out as a very young adult and grew into himself, and Legolas’ father was born.
so like, three to six thousand years old, maybe, which is probably a drop in the bucket of Elvish history judging by all the ethnic differentiation that had time to develop before Ungoliant came along, even if we can’t really tell because there weren’t years to count, before the Trees were destroyed.
plus a lot of Bilbo’s materials were probably directly from Elrond, whose library dates largely from the Third Age, probably, because he didn’t establish Imladris until after the Last Alliance. and Elrond isn’t the type to intentionally help Bilbo learn the wrong dialect and sound sillier than can be helped, even if everyone was humoring him more than a little.
so Frodo might sound hilariously formal for conversational use (though considering how most Elves use Westron he’s probably safe there) and kind of old-fashioned, but he’s not in any danger of being incomprehensible, because elves live on such a ridiculous timescale.
to over-analyse this awesome and hilarious post even more, legolas’ grandfather was from linguistically stubborn Doriath and their family is actually from a somewhat different, higher-status ethnic background than their subjects.
so depending on how much of a role Thranduil took in his upbringing (and Oropher in his), Legolas may have some weird stilted old-fashioned speaking tics in his Sindarin that reflect a more purely Doriathrin dialect rather than the Doriathrin-influenced Western Sindarin that became the most widely spoken Sindarin long before he was born, or he might have a School Voice from having been taught how to Speak Proper and then lapse into really obscure colloquial Avari dialect when he’s being casual. or both!
considering legolas’ moderately complicated political position, i expect he can code-switch.
…it’s also fairly likely considering the linguistic politics involved that Legolas is reasonably articulate in Sindarin, though with some level of accent, but knows approximately zero Quenya outside of loanwords into Sindarin, and even those he mostly didn’t learn as a kid.
which would be extra hilarious when he and gimli fetch up in Valinor in his little homemade skiff, if the first elves he meets have never been to Middle Earth and they’re just standing there on the beach reduced to miming about what is the short beard person, and who are you, and why.
this is elvish dialects and tolkien, okay. there’s a lot of canon material! he actually initially developed the history of middle-earth specifically to ground the linguistic development of the various Elvish languages!
Legolas: Alas, verily would I have dispatched thine enemy posthaste, but y’all’d’ve pitched a feckin’ fit.
Aragorn: *eyelid twitching*
Frodo: *frantically scribbling* Hang on which language are you even speaking right now
Pippin, confused: Is he not speaking Elvish?
Frodo, sarcastically: I dunno, are you speaking Hobbit?
Boromir, who has been lowkey pissed-off at the Hobbits’ weird dialect this whole time: That’s what it sounds like to me.
Merry, who actually knows some shit about Hobbit background: We are actually speaking multiple variants of the Shire dialect of Westron, you ignorant fuck.
Sam, a mere working-class country boy: Honestly y'all could be talkin Dwarvish half the time for all I know.
Pippin, entering Gondor and speaking to the castle steward: hey yo my man
Boromir, from beyond the grave: j e s u s
despite all i’ve done to you, i loved you. despite all I’ve done to you, i loved you. despite all i’ve done to you, i loved you.
this is possibly the worst thing verity has ever done to fitz
just started reading witch hat atelier. there’s something about qifrey as a water focused witch all while he’s terrified of water. even that is its own teaching moment, in how he conquers his fears by understanding and mastery
smoking the shit that turned the clock wise
insane that the most convincing argument for the darkside I’ve ever heard came from motherfucking maul as a proposition for a battle tactic for their survival. for a second even I was like now hold on a moment
the first tag I see on twt after watching the maul finale is #lawsonlives, and I’m going to be so honest as a tech fan who was breathing in the ‘no body no confirmed death’ copium like it was oxygen I needed to breathe, I don’t think I can do this again guys
dude star wars is so good and/or bad and/or mediocre sometimes, depending
he should have ran over him back on tattooine man
didn’t quite finish this in time, but here’s Jedi Maedhros for the soul. May the fourth be with you
a vivisection
sometimes i forget that i need to talk to my friends in order to talk to my friends
[as if this is not a normal and natural human thing to want] yeah i just really want to connect with people for some reason. Like some weird loser freak
