genuinely. going along with the idea that kyouji believes satomi will simply outgrow his attachment to him at some point, i Do think a key part of his half of the dynamic is the fact that he has simply accepted that truly, genuinely, long-lasting requited feelings are just Impossible. like he’s got some level of “this shouldn’t happen, therefore it’s never going to,” so deeply embedded in his brain it’s just a fact of reality to him at this point. but even so, on top of that, i have a hard time believing that he’d ever actually let satomi go his own separate way completely, ties fully cut.
mostly this is coming from an observation of a key shift in their dynamic from karaoke -> famiresu: in the 3914 era, kyouji is much more overt about the ways in which he is protective about satomi (e.g. the briefcase blood catching, wrapping him in his coat, physically curling around him + verbally standing up for him in front of the other yakuza, etc.), whereas in the ~4318 era, he hides his protectiveness/affection a lot more (e.g. the whole reporter arc). even if he believes satomi will eventually outgrow his crush, he is aware that his own attachment will likely never fade and has simply accepted that he must shift how he approaches him when the time inevitably instead.
all of kyouji’s interactions with satomi are thus filtered under the expectation that satomi and satomi alone ought to be the one to define exactly how far or not they go, which lines are acceptable to cross and which are not, particularly by the time of famiresu. if satomi wants kyouji around, he’s easily available for as long as he needs him. if satomi decides that kyouji is the scum of the earth and should kill himself and disappear forever for real this time (perhaps what kyouji actually believes about himself, on some level, for getting so attached to a fucking kid he picked up in fucking middle school of all places), he can also do that. satomi’s word is simply god.
but also. like. come on. you’re gonna tell me that guy isn’t capable of a little friendly stalking? a bit of a silent, unseen guardian angel schtick on the side?? there’s no fucking way he’s ever letting that kid go, not now, not for real. satomi could never see him again for the rest of his fucking life and kyouji could be living two blocks down the street, watching him sleep through the window at night and sneaking extra food into the back of his cabinets when he forgets to go grocery shopping for too long. he is watching that kid like he’s a plant that he has to water twice daily or it’ll die of dehydration. the imprinting goes both ways. the only reason he doesn’t burst into tears and crawl on the floor and beg satomi to let him stay when he says they shouldn’t see each other anymore is bc 1. he already thought it was inevitable that satomi would eventually come to that conclusion, and 2. he’s been preparing to become his invisible guardian protector and to die on the swords of satomi’s enemies for years. frankly he’s probably more worried about satomi actually catching him in the act than he is about satomi rejecting him.
satomi, come get your pet yakuza. he’s been scratching at the door all fucking night.
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