Phantasmagoria

I'm getting too old for this

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

so what you're gonna do is you're gonna trim the top off a bulb of garlic, using the knife's edge to take off the tip of every individual clove, that's important. you're gonna place the garlic face-up in a square of tinfoil, drizzle with olive oil, wrap completely in foil, place in baking tray, repeat with a copious amount of garlic bulbs. you're gonna put that baking tray in an oven set to 375-400°F, for 30-50 minutes, until soft and browned. you're gonna toast some good bread, slather generously with butter and honey, maybe a tiny lil bit o' salt. and then. you're gonna SQUEEZE. OUT. THAT. ROASTED GARLIC. onto the butter honey toast. and you're gonna eat it. food stolen directly from the plate of the gods. that's what you're gonna do.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the garlic. it beckons you

[thesweetestsupervillains]

It occurs to me that "1920s gangster doing a cooking show while holding you at gunpoint" is an untapped market.

We've had normal cooking shows. Now we need period piece cooking shows in character.

[sawed-on-shotgun]

hello my name is Stray Hair snd my big dream is to play the itsy bitsy spider on broadway. doyou mind if i practice on the side of your head.

[dogpuppy]

[theartofmadeline]

happy pride to the gay people in my computer <3

[i-am-a-fish]

I hope you get your favorite food this week and your favorite drink and your favorite 2k dollars

[drowsy-fantasy]

$5000 seems like a nice amount. Somebody should just give me $5000 today. Directly into my bank account. It would be very nice.

[only-cat-memes]

[dualboot-dollbot]

[isbergillustration]

Prideful Awooing

[qualityrachni]

@skingrad

[quasi-normalcy]

“How were LGBT people able to hijack the rainbow!?!”

Uhh, well Jake, we started using the rainbow to connote gayness and you immediately stopped using it because you were pants shittingly afraid of looking gay.

[fellator]

this fetish stuff is getting out of hand what the fuck is word play

[ruhrohrexia]

i wont worry about it i say to myself with the always worried disorder

[sunflorally]

I hope you find your way back to yourself. to the version of you that you miss, to a version of you that you recognize and identify with. I hope you meet happy again.

[podcastwizard]

you don’t realize how important lunch is until you’re wandering around thinking about how unloveable and untalented and uniquely cursed you are and then it’s 4pm and you finally eat lunch and you go Oh. oh right.

[f4therlesssss]

this isn’t a “blog” we are having tea together. do you take sugar

[sandersstudies]

How to tell a person “hey you are responding to a narrative that you’ve made up in your head rather than what’s actually happening” without sounding like a gaslighter.

[sarthathrace]

me to the accursed whispering amulet: hey can you speak up please i have an audio processing disorder

[visit-ba-sing-se]

I am running a marathon with a twisted ankle and it hurts but some pain is normal, right? Everyone says it's supposed to be hard. It is a marathon after all. I am running a marathon with a twisted ankle but honestly it could be worse, right? I heard someone once finished with a broken leg. The ankle is nothing compared to that. I am running a marathon with a twisted ankle but you can get used to pain, right? The body can endure almost anything. The problem is always the mind. I am running a marathon with a twisted ankle but I made it this far, that means I can keep going, right? Everyone says it's supposed to be hard. It is a marathon after all.