Angst? Angst

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[10ths-writing-corner]

Henrik’s nine month Master list

I tried to put them in the order I think it happened. I’ll be adding and updating as time goes on. Hope you enjoy! (Apologies for the cheesy titles, my only weakness)

The possession

The torture begins

There’s someone watching...

Let’s have some fun

All you have to do is ask

No one cares for you~

Giving up yet?

You’re going nowhere

Broken— Just as expected

Scream for me, puppet

Hide and seek

Tick tock, hero

Found you-

Was it a dream?

It’s my fault...

[10ths-writing-corner]

“Doc! Over here!”

The shout is quick to grab his attention, the cheerful voice drowning the loud chatter of the bar. Of course it was busy; it was the weekend, people wanted to celebrate another end to a long week of endeavors. However, the workdays were endless for him. Now that he had earned his place as a respected surgeon, and had become a father, free time was almost, if not at all, nonexistent. So one can imagine the relief Henrik felt once he plopped on the barstool next to one of his oldest friend.

“My apologies for my tardiness.” Henrik starts with a short exhale, the tension on his shoulders dropping significantly. “I was busy—“

“You were busy saving lives!” Chase interrupts quickly, understanding. The vibrant green strands of his hair poke from his backflipped hat, and he has to fight everything in him to not fix his hat. It is definitely not a proper way to hear a hat. The alcoholic beverage swishes in his glass as he gestures with his hand. “I’m just glad you could make it!”

Henrik shakes his head as he attempts to hide a smile, briefly taking his glasses off to wipe them clean. “I was busy fighting dirty dippers.” He finished.

Chase lips create a silent ‘Oh…’ before letting out a laugh. “Your little one is a feisty one, huh? Can’t really tell if those dark circles are from the hospital or the baby.”

“You are so very funny, Chase.” The doctor huffed as he waved at the bartender. He didn’t even have to exchanged words and he was already being served a pint of his favorite beer.

The bartender approached the two of them, beer in hand and a new glass for Chase in hand. “Doctor, it’s been a while!” He sets the drinks down to then take Chase’s empty glass and start cleaning it. “I thought you and your wife moved back.”

Henrik takes the pint in his hands, muttering a thanks and taking a long gulp out of it. It truly had been a while since he had gone out for a drink like this. Even more so when Chase started to tease him about it.

“Woah, doc!” He exclaimed, “Didn’t know this was a competition!”

“You know you’d lose against him, Brody.” The bartender said. “Let’s not forget who had to take you home after you challenged him.”

Chase pouts at the mention of those events, arms crossing over his chest with a huff. “Yeah, well… maybe one day I’ll be able to ask for a rematch.”

“You are silly for thinking you can best a German when it comes to drinking.” Henrik observed, patting Chase in a sympathetic manner. He then turns towards the bartender and sighs. “My wife and I are parents now.”

“Ah, that explains why we haven’t seen you. Well, congratulations to you and your wife! Drinks on the house tonight.”

The two of them say their cheers and resume drinking. They both catch up for a while, Chase sharing how his channel is growing and how things are with Stacy and the kids. In return, Henrik shares his experience of being a new father and his worries, admitting that he feels guilt over not spending more time in the house as much as he should.

“I think you’re overthinking, which is weird to say to you.” Chase offered. “If anyone is qualified to be a good parent, then that’s you! Trust me, your little girl is in good hands.”

“Thank you, Chase.” Henrik offers with a side smile, “I… I really needed to hear that.”

The father grins, “No problem, Doctor man! Listen, as long as you’re doing what’s right and you have a very supportive partner then there’s nothing that could go wrong!”

Ah, speaking of which, I should tell Maria that I’m with you.”

Henrik brings out his phone from his pocket, swiftly unlocking it and typing the text message to his wife. An arm falls on his shoulders, startling him just enough to almost drop his phone. “Wait take a selfie!”

Henrik raised an eyebrow in question.

“Yeah! We haven’t taken a picture together in so long! You can also send it to the missus and show her you're having fun with me!"

“You will get me in trouble for it.”

“What? Is she gonna think you’re cheating on her? Well, I can see that. I’m pretty handsome, aren’t I?”

The doctor can only roll his eyes at Chase’s antics, but still pulls him closer and takes the picture. Chase is right, they hadn’t taken a picture since… he can’t really remember the last time they took a picture. Sometimes he forgets that is okay to go out and have a little fun.

"Yo send me that so I can send it to Stace. She wouldn't believe I got you out of your rock." Chase teases, which earns him another eye-roll and a disapproving shake of his head.

When Henrik set his phone down and picked up his glass, a chill ran up his spine, causing the hairs on the back of his head stand tall. He swiftly turns his head around, thinking it was Chase placing his arm over his shoulders again. Yet, there was nothing behind him other than the scenery of a busy bar.

Weird… someone must’ve walked too close to him and stirred the air around his personal space.

Or at least that’s what he wanted to think, because now he couldn’t shake the feeling someone was watching him. No, not watching, stalking… observing him like a predator would to a defenseless and guard-lowered prey. He can’t help but turn around and look again, making sure he’s really not losing his mind.

“Schneep?” Chase calls, brows furrowed as he follows Henrik’s line of sight. “What’s up?”

Henrik scanned the bar, every single face he could see to make sure none of those eyes were on him. “I…” He starts, but gets lost in thought when he notices the shadows on the far corner of the bar. There’s a booth, but it’s completely empty. The lamp hanging above it it’s off, giving the space more of an ominous look.

He swallows once, and then shakes his head. “It is nothing.” He mutters, bringing his hand up to his nape and soothing the hairs still standing alert. “I think I’m just tired.”

Chase rests his hand on his shoulder, offering the doctor a deadpan expression. “Schneep, that is the understatement of the year.”

Henrik playfully smacks Chase on the head, both of them laughing it off soon after. They both resume their chatter when commotion ensues at the entrance of the bar.

“Henrik?!” Someone shouts over the chatter and music. Both fathers turn towards the voice, but surprise only shows on Henrik’s features when his eyes see a figure with a hood stalking towards him.

Chase is the first one to react, quickly standing from the stool he was sitting on and puts himself between Henrik and the mysterious man. “Woah there, pal. Haven’t you heard about personal space?”

The man stares down at Chase, wariness evident in his eyes. He takes a moment to scan him before speaking again, voice cold and snappy. “I need to speak with Henrik.”

“You need to speak with him?” Chase shoots back, folding his arms over his chest. “And who are you to be making those demands?”

“It’s important.” The man gritted, hands balling into fists. “Look, just let me talk to him!”

“Schneep, do you know who this asshole is?”

“I do.” Henrik stands from the stool, placing a calming hand on Chase’s shoulder. “He is a friend.”

Chase scoffs, stepping aside but not straying far from the doctor. “Maybe he should learn some manners…”

Upon closer inspection, Henrik noticed the cuts and bruises on the man’s face. “Jackie… What happened to you?!”

Jackie shakes his head, brown bangs bouncing and slipping out of the hood of his torn, red hoodie. “Never mind that! Are you okay?”

The question has both Henrik and Chase looking at each other confused. “I am fine. Chase and I have been here… What is this about?”

Jackie exhales sharply before taking a quick sweep of the bar. His eyes scan each and every person, as if looking for someone dangerous hiding behind the ordinary. It was odd how Henrik had done the same thing earlier. “We should leave. It’s not safe here… We’re too exposed.”

Before any of them could utter a word, Jackie was already moving towards exit. Though, he had a fierce grip on Henrik’s wrist as he tugged him behind.

“Woah, woah! Where are you taking him?!” Chase demands while following close behind and out of the bar. “Hey! Let go of him or I’ll call the cops!”

“Jackie!” Henrik snaps as he pulls free from the hero’s grasp. He breathes sharply and then exhales. “Can you please explain what is happening? I will not take another step until you explain yourself, yes?”

There’s clear frustration on Jackie’s features but he soon obliged to Henrik’s question. “I… I fought something… That thing knew who I was. Not in the term of my hero persona, but me personally… My past. It knew you…”

Silence blankets the three of them, and that icy sensation crawls up Henrik’s spine once more. Feeling eyes on the back of his neck, and he’s fast to rub the goosebumps away. If he’s completely honest, he’s been feeling like someone’s been watching him for days but he kept convincing himself it was the exhaustion clinging to him. And even now, he still believes that Jackie might just hit his head too hard and is spewing nonsense. But the expression he carries says otherwise.

“Can I just say…” Chase spoke up to get rid of the ominous silence. “That whatever he’s talking about is absolutely insane? Is he one of your patients, Schneep?”

Henrik sighs, “Yes, but he’s also the vigilante of the city.”

“Henrik!” Jackie hissed.

“We can trust him, I promise you.”

Chase’s jaw falls open as he looks between his friend and the brooding man standing next to him. Mouth opening and closing as he connects the dots. “Wait… wait-wait wait… You mean to tell me this is the Jackieboy-Man?! You are his doctor?! What?!”

“Keep your voice down!” The hero hisses, “You want the whole city to find out?! And seriously, we should go!”

“Alright, alright. We will go to the hospital, we need to get those wounds looked up first.” Henrik decided while he motioned the other two towards his car. “Did I not tell you no more hero work until your stab wounds healed up?”

“Bro, I can’t believe you never told me you knew Jackieboy…” Chase muttered as he got on the back seat. “Not cool… And also, didn’t think you were such an asshole! Thought you were more… friendly.”

Jackie huffs as he closed the passenger door. “Never meet your heroes, I’spose.”

“Chase, I can drop you off if you wish.”

“You’re kiddin’?! I just found out you’re friends with the coolest superhero, I’m not missing this!”

At that response, Jackie can’t help but send a glare towards the doctor. However, that doesn’t seem to bother Henrik at all. “I know both of you will get along just fine.”

With that said, the trio heads towards the hospital, unaware of the shadow trailing behind their wake.

[10ths-writing-corner]

“Let me see.” Henrik insists for the third time, not letting way for the hero to pass. Was he aware Jackie could just shove him out of his way? Yes. Was he going to let him off the hook? Of course not. “Why won’t you let me help you?”

“When are you gonna give it up? I don’t need your help.” Jackie retorts before trying to slip by the doctor, though every time he moved there was Henrik blocking his way. He sighs with annoyance.

This whole ordeal was annoying.

They did this little dance for a few more moments before Jackie yells in frustration. He could just pick up the doctor and move him out of his way, but he also knew under this unclear state of mind he could potentially hurt the man. And that’s the last thing he needed at this very moment.

“And when will you realize that those big muscles of yours do not give you a pass to not receive help?” Henrik keeps scolding, as if Jackie was nothing but a mere toddler throwing a tantrum.

“Move, Schneep!” Jackie warns as he looms over the doctor, despite them practically being the same height. “I mean it.”

The warning only has the doctor further standing his ground, defiance clear in those bright yet icy blue eyes. “Then why come find me, hm? Why come to my office, dripping blood all over the carpet only to tell me off?”

That’s a question Jackie doesn’t have an answer to, because he doesn’t even know why he found himself flying to the hospital instead of his crappy apartment. He really doesn’t know why he decided to make a pit stop… All he knows is that he regrets it.

A hiss slips from his lips, the sharp pain on his ribs making him lose good train of thought. Without hesitation, the doctor is quick to act and offer his body as support when Jackie’s knees buckle under his own weight. A string of curses on a language he can’t understand flow with ease but is nowhere as surprising as the realization of how strong Henrik truly is.

Guess Jackie doesn’t have a choice now that his body has given out on him.

Henrik mutters under his breath as he drags Jackie towards the couch near the window and unceremoniously lets him sit down. “Hurry and be quick to take your shirt off. I do not wish for you to keep bleeding out.”

“I can do it myself—“ Jackie starts, but is quick to bite his tongue when the doctor sends him an icy cold glare. Clearly not playing nice Doctor anymore.

Wordlessly, Henrik rummages through his drawers, quickly finding gauze, saline and antibiotics. He then tosses them at the hero’s lap, “Clean your wound while I get sterilized equipment.” He orders, which has Jackie blinking a bit stunned at the way he’s being spoken to. “If you wish to interrupt my work then you will play by my rules. You did not listen when I am nice? You get to listen when I am strict.”

Usually Jackie has a retort but seeing how the doctor’s demeanor changed, a part of him doesn’t want to find out what’ll happen if he pushes his buttons. What the hell… he fights thugs, the mafia and the once in a while supernatural being; how the hell is he slightly scared of a doctor..?! Nonetheless, Jackie strips and disposes of his bloody shirt as he was instructed to do, one hand still putting pressure on the three inch stab wound on his side.

Or maybe it’s the blood loss that has him acting a bit more compliant. Regardless, he was listening to Henrik who was long gone looking for whatever he needed to treat him. At the end of the day, the doctor is fussing over nothing! He’s been stabbed multiple times and he’s been fine!

Oh… Sitting down was a bad idea.

Of course Jackie’s stupidity would come bite him in the ass. Now that he was actually sitting, the adrenaline rush that had been keeping him vigilant and conscious was slipping through his fingers. Did he really lose that much blood? He blinks rapidly, trying to get rid of the nausea and the dark edges blurring his vision. His hand shake when he grabs the bottle of saline but was proving too difficult to get open.

Shit… he might actually pass out…

And he must look like it, because he hears hurried steps approaching him and sees Henrik’s silhouette above him. The doctor is fast with his hands, taking charge of the situation.

“See,” Henrik starts as he pours the saline on a gauze and starts cleaning up the wound. “If you just stop throwing tantrum then you would have been resting instead of fighting to stay conscious.”

Jackie hisses at the stinging sensation of his wound being cleaned up, “I… I don’t need your scolding.”

“But you do.” Henrik admonished, “You are a superhero yet you act like a three year old.“

A chuckle scoffs past Jackie’s lips, “Do… D-Do you have kids, doc?”

Henrik stops with the sutures, briefly glancing over as if the idea was wild. He shakes his head and continues his task. “I do not. Not at the moment.”

Jackie hums softly, he doesn’t know why he has the need to say this but the words come out anyways. Maybe is the blood loss talking, “You’d be a great dad…”

There’s a beat or two of silence between hero and doctor. Enough time passes for Henrik to finish stitching the wound and making sure it’s all disinfected. As soon as Henrik pulls away, Jackie is attempting to stand to which Henrik is quick to pin him back down with a glare.

“What? You’re done patching me up, I can leave.” Jackie retorts, eyebrows creasing with a frown.

“You should not be stumbling around at night.” Henrik replies, trying to stop his eyes from wandering over the old scars of wounds that didn’t get to heal properly. “I do not know your story, nor what you have been through, but I assure you I am a friend.”

Henrik discards of his gloves, tossing them in the small trash bin next to his desk. It looks like he wants to say more, but chooses again it. “I have rounds. You are welcome to stay and rest.”

“I can’t just stay… what if someone comes in?”

Henrik shakes his head, “No one comes here.” At the question in Jackie’s eyes he then replies with a fraction of a smile, “This will be my office once I become head surgeon.”

Before Jackie could utter a word, Henrik disappeared behind the door with a soft click. Guess he didn’t have much of a choice. A deep sigh leaves his body, oddly enough feeling safer than he ever has in a while. It wouldn’t be so bad to take a nap, but only a 10 minute nap! He doesn’t need to be letting the doctor know he won.

[10ths-writing-corner]

So... Jackie is an orphan. He spent most of his young days in the streets. Jackie wasn’t the most saint boy. He used to steal food, pick pocket people on the streets. Just doing things to get by, because who’d want a rebellious punk like him? Whoever had left him at the doorstep of the orphanage had done the right thing, or that what he had always thought. He knew why his biological parents didn’t want him. He was born with super strength and super speed, who’d want to deal with that, right? A troublemaker freak.

He’d always get into fights in school, no one really had high hopes for him. That was until he met the Cool Patrol. Sure, they bonded and talked about him potentially becoming a hero. Jackie laughed at the idea. Him, a superhero? Have this people seen his record? How close his ass was to being sent to Juvenile Prison? He declined the offer and kept doing what he was best at, hiding who he really was and causing trouble.

[astudyingreer]

hey so like

hi, you. yeah im talking to you. You like my stuff from time to time and reblog once and a while, and I always recognize you in my notes. we’ve never talked, maybe you dont like to say much or you’re nervous or something. it’s okay, whatever it is. 

I see you. you mean a lot to me. sometimes when I’m having a hard day, I’ll notice your name once again in my notifs and it makes me smile. im not kidding.

I don’t care if you’re a “ghost” follower or you send me asks all the time. i see you and I love you so much, genuinely and truly. you are really important to me. 

thank you. thank you for being there. <3

[10ths-writing-corner]

Whumptober #4 Alt. Concussion

“Mm… M’head hurts…”

Henrik hums softly, keeping his focus on suturing the hero’s forehead. “You got your face bashed with a bat. It will hurt for a long while.” He mentioned disapprovingly, yet there was worry underlining his voice. “I know you do not like it, but—“

“I’ll have to stay the night. Yup, duly noted.” The hero finished, “They got me good, doc. I could barely walk…”

The doctor huffs, “Is that so? Your big hero muscles are not a match against metal baseball bats?” Jackie sends him a glare, lips parting but a hiss coming out when Henrik dabs the wound. “Your thick skull can only handle so much, hm? You are lucky all you got was a concussion and only needed a few stitches.”

There’s a beat or two of silence, and enough times goes by for Henrik to finish the sutures.

“Thanks, doc…” Jackie says, breaking the silence between the two. “I-I know you were about to go home, and you just…”

“No need to thank me. We are friends, yes?” He replies with a smile, “You came here instead of going home. I am well aware it was a rather difficult decision for you to make. And, well, your identity must stay unknown, yes? We cannot achieve that if another doctor treats you.”

A chuckle bursts out of his chest, though it didn’t help the throbbing in his head. “Yeah… When you’re right your right, Doc.”

[10ths-writing-corner]

Whumptober #3 Isolation

“Is the doc really okay? He hasn’t really come out of his room for days…”

Someone scoffs, “Would you be okay if you found Stacy sleeping with another man?”

“Jackie!”

After that there’s silence in the other side of the door. The doctor shudders a breath before wiping the trail of fresh tears sliding down his cheek. It had been weeks since he found about Maria’s affair, and ever since Henrik had been trying to understand where he went wrong… Everything he did, all the sacrifices he’s made, was all for hers and Elaine’s well being.

How could she just… throw it all away? All those years they shared together, their vows… gone, as if none of it ever mattered. And sure, Henrik was beyond angry about finding out Maria's infidelity, and he felt nothing but satisfaction breaking Rick's nose. In those moments he felt happy about breaking things off and divorcing her, but now... Now all he could feel was sorry for himself. For letting things get this bad.

Maybe Maria was right... Maybe he was the one to doom their marriage. Maybe if he had been a better man, a better husband.

A better father.

He sighs softly, turning on his side to let the silent tears fall on the pillow. Icy blue eyes stare at his own wedding ring. The only reminder that he failed at the one thing he promised so fiercely to excel at. And even though a small part of him new this wasn't entirely on him, he did vow to never let his heart be toyed with ever again.

[10ths-writing-corner]

Whumptober #2 Taking accountability

A sigh falls from Henrik’s chapped lips, a sorrowful expression on his face. He hated seeing his friend suffer, hated seeing the guilt overtaking the brightness and optimism. But he hated himself the most for not being able to offer the reassurance the hero so desperately needed.

“Jackie… None of this is your fault…”

“Yes, it was.” The hero persists, fingers locked together and held tightly against his mouth. A way to stop himself from reaching out and touching the doctor. They both knew what that would do if they were reckless. “If I had been home… If I was stronger, you wouldn’t have…”

The words died down. And they’re left in silence once more.

Henrik shakes his head, careful not to make himself dizzy. If he became dizzy then he’d feel like he was back with Him… and if he fell down that rabbit hole, then… who knows how long it would take him to come back out…. “You were not the one to hold a weapon against me…”

Jackie scoffs with bitterness, “I might as well have…”

“Jackie…”

“Stop trying to make me feel better.” He ends up snapping, not caring for the tears sliding down his face. “For once, let me take accountability for my mistakes. I wasn’t there when it mattered the most!”

“But you are here now.” Henrik shoots back, gripping the blanket with the little strength he can muster. Hands shaking, just as his breath. “You ground me when I cannot tell what is real and what is not. You are there when… When I cannot sleep or wake up…. You are here now, Jackie… I would have— I would have been dead long ago. I need you to understand that, yes?”

Jackie sighs before sniffling and wiping the tears still streaming down his face with the heel of his hand. At the end, he offers a silent nod, only because he knew there was no winning against Henrik’s words.

[10ths-writing-corner]

Whumptober #1 Please don’t cry

The nausea had yet to settle. It had been hours, twelve hours to be precise, since Henrik was found and rushed into surgery. He had tried to get Jackie to leave with him, to at least go home and change with the promise of coming right back to the hospital. It was to no avail, because Jackie was an unmoving mountain and the waiting room was his valley.

And Marving gets it, if he were in the hero’s shoes he would’ve been stubborn enough to stand guard right outside the operating room.

This whole situation… it has the magician feeling a storm of emotions that he doesn’t even know where to start. He feels happy and relieved, but he can also feel the bitterness of resentment and anger trying to overshadow the good. It’s good that Henrik was found. That he’s alive… But now that also sparks hope in his already damaged heart.

Marvin had already come to terms of never finding his best friend. It’s been… centuries. But now seeing how Henrik managed to make it out as intact as possible, he can’t help but wonder… He can’t help but think about the words Jackie spat at him, how he was a coward for giving up.

The internal monologue comes to a stop just as he folded one of Jackie’s hoodies. Just from downstairs Marvin could hear a quiet pair of footsteps, light enough to go undetected but not entirely concealed. At least not to someone who’s always with their guard up.

No one should be able to come into this house… It’s heavily guarded with charms that not even the most skilled wizard or warlock could break through. The only reason why he could even come into this house was because the original caster allowed him to.

A sense of dread settles at the pit of his stomach as he makes his way out of the room and down the hallway. Bandaged hands rest at his side, a small ball of green and red flames coming to life. At the ready to attack at the intruder. Marvin peeks just enough from the stairs, seeing a shadow move a bit disoriented.

Who the hell is there…?

He takes a step, quickly regretting it when the floorboard squeaks and announces his presence. It all happened in a blink of an eye, the shadow moving with alarm and speed and seconds later a dagger flying towards him. If it weren’t for his quick reflexes, he wouldn’t have been able to wave his free hand and catch it mid-air with a spell.

All of this seemed too familiar… A sense of dejavú washing over him. Mismatched eyes widen the more he stared at the floating dagger, carefully examining the handle and its intricate shape and design… No, it can’t be, right? Last time he saw that dagger—

The magician grabs the dagger and runs downstairs, heart beating erratically against his ribcage. No, he won’t believe it until he sees it with his own two eyes.

Once at the bottom or the stairs and his eyes land on the man he had been looking for far too long stood in front of him, brows in a scowl and sapphire eyes sharp. Knees threaten to buckle, but he didn’t let himself fall apart just yet.

Marvin swallows dryly and holds the dagger to his chest with trembling hands. His friend… the one who he cared about and had failed that night… the one he had giving up looking for was standing right in front of him.

Lips part, but no words come out. They part again, and again until he can form one word, even if it comes out in a frail whisper. “Jamie…?” The name is foreign on his lips, because he hadn’t dare speak his name after the trail. After he was labeled a murder and cast away from what he had built along with his friend. His confidant…

Jameson can only glare at him, but there’s no hatred. Anger, yes, but never hatred. He wished there was, because if it weren’t for his recklessness then none of this would’ve happened. Jameson wouldn’t have been taken away; Henrik wouldn’t have been taken away…

The dagger clatters to the floor, and before none of them knew it, Marvin was kneeling in front of the dapper. He didn’t deserve to hug him, didn’t deserve to cry his name and cry with relief at the fact that Jameson was standing in front of him. Alive. If anything, Marvin was ready to accept his punishment, accept death, or even have his magic stripped from him. Yet, all he received is silence, and a cautious pat to his back.

The touch was all the evidence Marvin needed to know this was real. It was too much for his heart to bear, for years of inconsolable grief and loss came flooding like a tidal wave. A sob tore through his chest, and once started there was no stopping the tears.

“I’m sorry!” Marvin sobbed, “I’m sorry, Jem! I’m so sorry! I-I should’ve known—! Should’ve listen! I should’ve listened!”

As he begged for a forgiveness he didn’t deserve, he was met with nothing but silence.

“I-I looked… I promise I did! I looked for you— I wasn’t strong enough… I-I could never be as strong as y-you… I don’t deserve your forgiveness, I-I don’t!”

Fingers hook under the magician’s chin and slowly lift his face. The scowl had soften with sorrow and resignation. A look that said ‘I know you tried.’ After all these centuries, after who knows what he went through, he was still Jameson.

{Please don’t cry.} The dapper signs, {It’s… Good to be back.}

[hawberries]

What's wrong with the name Fairy? When she was younger, I called her Little Fairy, but I can't call her like that when she's grown, can I?

[10ths-writing-corner]

“Hush, hush… This won’t hurt you one bit.”

The words are oddly reassuring, soothing the uneasiness sitting at the point of his stomach. You’d think after witnessing the doctor do this over and over he’d trust those very words. He’d witnessed Henrik do this plenty of times, with adults and children alike. He’d even been on the receiving end numerous times!

But never like this. Never against his own will.

Henrik never forced him to receive help. Never took away his freedom of choice, even if it pained the doctor to see his closest friend sabotage his well being for the sake of saving lives. Guess they were both similar in that department.

Always giving chances, never being forceful.

The hero struggled against his restraints, and is funny he called it like that, because there were no ropes or shackles bounding him down. He was just lying there, muscles stiff and heavy like a corpse. He could move his eyes, hear how the floor creaked under Henrik’s weight as he shifted it from leg to leg. Something he now had to do constantly due to the injury he sustained during those hellish nine months he was missing.

And coming back hadn’t been as easy as Jackie selfishly expected. He had been so desperate to have his best friend back that he didn’t take into consideration that… nothing would be the same. It had been a hard pill to swallow, to admit the only person he had trusted after going through his own horrors could simply be gone.

He’s getting sidetracked, he should be thinking of a way to get out of this.

Luckily for Jackie, enough time has passed that the numbness was slowly ebbing away, giving him back enough control to move his head and use his lips to reason with his friend.

“H-Hen…” Jackie’s voice cracks when he speaks for the first time ever since he was caught off guard by a needle to his neck. “Hen… You need—You g-gotta… snap out of it…”

Upon hearing his voice, Henrik quickly rushed to his side. There’s clattering to his side, but Jackie is unable to see what it was. All he had was the sound of glass hitting the nightstand, but not enough to break it. The hero inspects his friend as best as he can for any signs that his mind was being held prisoner by past events or, god forbid, the demon they had been trying to find and get rid off for god knows how long.

But all he’s met is with clear icy blues, full recognition and capability of understanding what is being done. Jackie’s not sure if it made things better or worse.

The bed dips when Henrik sits down, just like he has done many times over for the past few years. “Snap out of it? There is nothing wrong with me.” Henrik assures, “My head is intact. My mind is clear of the things I have to do. My friend, I have always had your trust, yes? I would never dare to harm you.”

“I-I know, Hen…” Jackie swallows thickly, keeping his eyes on the doctor. Doing his best to convey that he’s not the enemy. “Y-You always take such good… good care of me. B-But—”

“Yes… yes I do.” Henrik agrees, patting Jackie’s shoulder. “Which is why I know it is best for you to stay home. Safe. Where I can see you.”

Blood drains from Jackie’s face. Did he hear right? Henrik can’t be serious… he doesn’t mean to imply…

“Henrik…? Please, t-tell me this is a joke…?” Jackieboy laughs nervously, waiting for the doctor to say all of this is a horrible prank.

Deep down, though, he knew the doctor was serious. Henrik never played pranks on him.

He watched Henrik briefly turn away, only to face him once more with a syringe full of a clear fluid. There’s no trace of a smile on his features, but there is a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction.

“Do not worry, Jackie. I will make sure to keep you safe.”

[10ths-writing-corner]

It’s all in my head… it’s all in my head…. It’s all—

“Are you sure about that?”

Hands pressed tightly against his mouth, muffling the whimper that threatened to escape. How is he back here…?! Didn’t he escape….?

“Escape? Tsk, tsk, I thought you were smarter than this, doctor.” That cursed voice spoke again, echoing and bouncing against the dark walls. Making it harder to pinpoint where He really was.

Chains clink softly as they sway back and forth, despite there not being any wind to push them. The eerie red glow down the hallway was the only source of light for him, but he knew better than to fall for that trick again. The darkness was his friend, the only thing keeping that a small distance between life and death.

But he knows better than this. He knows his mind to play tricks on him every once in a while, when he was most vulnerable.

Before he knew it, the demon took him by surprise. The scream being cut short when that clawed hand closed around his throat, cutting the air out. Henrik struggled, he fought and scratched at the arm and kicked at the mass of darkness in front of him. Wide blue eyes staring at neon green ones in pure horror.

This is not real, this is not real… this is not real!

“One thing is for certain, my dear doctor.” Anti hummed as he tilted his head, smile crooked with malice and glee. “No matter where you go, or how much time passes, I will always find my favorite puppet.”

“Leave me alone!” Henrik screamed into the darkness, fighting off empty air as he shot up on his bed.

Lightning flashed right outside the window, the split second of light illuminating his bedroom. The rumble of thunder that soon followed after made the house shake for a brief moment. It… it was really all in his head…

Sweat pools on his brow, causing his hair to stick to his overheated skin. His heart continued to pound against his ribcage, and he for sure believed it would burst out at any moment. Henrik takes his surroundings after his eyes adjust to the darkness, confirming there were no monsters of demons hiding in the shadows. He takes calming breaths, hand pressed against his chest in order to ground himself back to reality.

It’s just in his head, it’s just in his head…

There’s a gentle tap in his hand, and Henrik can’t help the slight guilt at the realization that he had woken up his beloved. One part he couldn’t help the frustration of not being able to have too many normal nights, but the other couldn’t be more happy to have someone by his side to help him through it.

Henrik takes Jameson’s hands, quietly reassuring that he’s okay. It was just another nightmare.

“My apologies, my love.” Henrik whispered, pressing their foreheads together before planting a gentle kiss. “You can return to sleep.”

Even in the darkness, Henrik knows Jameson is giving him a pointed look out of concern. Gentle fingers curl and squeeze with reassurance, one that meant “I’m here.”

It still frustrated him to no end, that after so long… after so many years, Henrik still crumbled in fear at the mere thought of being back in that cursed place. The place that killed who he was… He really hasn’t been the same. At least he can admit that… he has his own emotions a bit more under control than when he first escaped. He’ll at least give himself that sort of credit.

Sooner than later, both of them lay back down in bed. Holding each other close and tight. It didn’t take Jameson to fall asleep, and Henrik followed soon after with one thought in mind.

It’s all in his head. It’s all in his head… it’s all in his head.

[10ths-writing-corner]

Just realized that there isn’t much angst with Chase and Anti. I mean we literally got the whole interaction between them in the video! Now I wonder what happened next to poor dad after some red mf said "Hello Chase :)))"

If you mean in this blog, yeah, I don’t write a lot of Chase and Anti 😭 I always lean more towards Henrik and Anti angst. But, I know here is plenty of Chase angst 👀 I mean, there used to but maybe it’s lost in the sauce 🥲

[10ths-writing-corner]

Birthday fix for the birthday boy!

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[10ths-writing-corner]

Ayo, it’s been a while! Took a break from writing and all of that, but I’m picking right back up! Though, it’s not ego related. I decided to start with something new, still, I would really appreciate the support!

At least for these type of fics I’ll keep them strictly to ao3 while I’ll still post ego content here! No, I’m not gonna abandon the egos, they still hold a very big place in my heart.

Anyways, here it is! It’s from the MDZS fandom! (the grandmaster of demonic cultivation) I really, really recommend the book series, the anime and live action! (Which goes by The Untamed)

This fic is inspired by @eledsart Tattoo artist AU, as soon as I laid eyes on it I instantly fell in love, and I just had to write it! Please, make sure to give their art some love!

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[dmnfox]

Marvin the Magnificent Reference Sheet 

 This design belongs to @10ths-writing-corner Custom design by me :)

I drew this as a gift for my friendo @10ths-writing-corner with fresh new ideas for this magic manz. I challenged my hand at making a unique style for this Marvin and I had so much fun putting him together with the stories given to me to draw out the design.

!!Please do NOT use or repost!!

[10ths-writing-corner]

Febuwhump #5-6: “That’s gonna scar.”, Secrets revealed.

Puppet master AU

“That’s gonna scar…” Chase mumbled under his breath before hissing.

“{Well, you wouldn’t have this type of wound if you would just listen to what I tell you. I wouldn’t have to use my strings to put you in your place.}” Jameson argued back in Chase’s mind. His sapphire eyes focused on the cuts over Chase’s wrists, luckily he didn’t have to worry about the one on his neck since the collar hid it. Jameson tried to be gentle as he tended the wounds, but frustration was evident in his actions, and hearing Chase stifle a his or groan brought odd satisfaction to all of this. “{If Henrik asks what happened, you tell him you relapsed.}”

“W-What? But I’ve been doing good— OW!” Jameson squeezed the tender area around his wrist, soon letting go when Chase recoiled into himself like a wounded animal. “Y-You won’t be able to fool Henrik forever, y’know? He’s gonna find out the monster you really are. He’ll start asking questions a-and your secrets will be revealed.” Chase threatened while rubbing his wrist.

Jameson glared daggers at Chase, “{Do you really wish to challenge me after earlier? Then watch your tongue.}” Jameson signs before turning his back towards the father, walking out of the room and into the kitchen. It was time for Henrik’s coffee break after all.