[slightmood]

mom: who the hell finished all the snacks

me:

[champagnemanagement]

[authorityissues]

the era of politicians zing-ing each other on like,twitter has me so depressed. i don’t want ha-ha funny quips between war criminals

[kngshxt-deactivated20180831]

why did i try weed omg ima die i feel like a a dvd player

[madeline-kahn]

Music in Film: Shrek (2001) dir. Andrew Adamson, Vicky Jenson

[killin-the-machine]

[thorgyorgy]

[jonathizzle]

When the hot classmate sits next to you

When the hot classmate talks to you

[podencos]

[sorryfortheraybans-deactivated2]

[thebootydiaries]

JK Rowling: I shall name him my villain Voldemort. It is French for "fleeing from death", indicative of his primary desire to become immortal, and the fear that motivates him.

JK Rowling: These two characters can turn into a black dog and a werewolf

JK Rowling: theyre called black dog and werewolf mcwerewolf

[neeek-deactivated20220906]

There would have been a lot less death in the wild west if they had just built the towns big enough

[rob0419]

[bidoof]

*youth pastor voice* here’s something that’s “on fleek”…….the lord

[curseworm]

does mace work on birds

[curseworm]

if a heron is attacking me will mace be an effective deterrent

[curseworm]

time sensitive question please respond

[amargedom]

“I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It’s probably the most important thing in a person.”

— Audrey Hepburn

[thebootydiaries]

‪karl marx ghost watching me check out at sephora right after i just ranted about capitalism on twitter for clout‬

[tankaramo]

me, making a phone call: god i hope they don’t answer