Likes Cats

nixie. wears braces. aged 20+ years old. may occasionally reblog stuff.

[pangur-and-grim]

sitting in the chairs, so civilized

[nem23]

[castformi-deactivated20241025]

dystopia au where we are all assigned one of two chosen genders at birth

[peppylilspitfuck]

Thanks to ultrasounds, the genders can be assigned before birth.  The people are so excited to conform they throw “Gender reveal parties” to make sure their offspring exist in a strict binary since before they can even form thoughts. 

[slightlykylie]

Children are color-coded according to their binary assignment. 

[darkersolstice]

One of the genders is seen as inherently inferior.

[yothobro-deactivated20200505]

This all sounds really effing creepy when you put it that way

[rooksandravens]

#BECAUSE IT IS

[fuckyeahfeminist]

And if you deviate from the assigned gender you can be disowned by your family, fired from your job, and beaten by authorities.

[rodserlingofficial]

[thepromiscuousfinger]

[osheamobile]

Posts to give @bixbythemartian wartime flashbacks

[bixbythemartian]

look, I know there's no way to convince people not to try to send this copy in when they order a pepperoni pizza from their local pizza place. I know that. I just want to point out a few things, just speaking as someone who used to work in pizza. (this is in delco- delivery/carryout- the rules are different for sit down restaurant and brick oven type places, but most pizza people get is gonna be from a delco with a conveyor belt oven)

one: you notice how it's on the bleeding edge between burnt and well done? that's because that's basically the only way to get a pizza with this much pepperoni to be remotely edible. this pizza cook worked very hard to make this work, pepperoni is really difficult to use a lot of on a pizza because it interferes with the cooking. it's fatty, and fat is insulating, which means it makes it harder to cook the dough. it's not just about being stingy (though I'm sure that corporate pizza has reduced the number of slices on pepperoni pizzas to save money for sure), there really is an ideal ratio of pepperoni to crust to sauce to cheese, and you don't have to exceed it by a lot to fuck a pizza up. (this is true of most ingredients, tbh, pizza is at all times mere inches from becoming a casserole, and adding extra ingredients in excessive amounts is a good way to get to casserole, particularly if they are wet ingredients, like onions or green peppers)

two: this picture was taken for the internet, so the person probably cleaned up the pizza before they took the picture. if they cut it in a box, they moved it to a fresh box. they cleaned up extra grease, soaked it up with paper towels or napkins. your pizza is almost certainly not going to look nearly this good.

three: people who work in pizza also have access to the internet. I cannot tell you how many none pizza with left beef orders I have canceled on sight. there's a reasonable chance someone will look at this copy and go 'oh it's the meme pizza' and cancel your order immediately and without hesitation.

'oh, but this is more edible than none pizza with left beef' no, it LOOKS more edible in this particular photo because the pizza cook was feeling bored and indulgent and was willing to baby this pepperoni monstrosity and made it look nice. your crime slices are much more likely to end up floating on a sea of pepperoni grease and, if you're very unlucky, the dough in the center will still be somewhat raw. the reason that the pizza chef is proud of this is that it is difficult to do. none pizza with left beef was at least cooked.

[parkayquarts]

[pangur-and-grim]

I have a sinus infection, so I was blowing my nose a lot while on the exercise bike and throwing the tissues beside me. anyway I just glanced over, and Pangur is nesting in the used tissues. kinda cute, kinda nasty

[dreamlogic]

im in the bathroom listening to the following conversation between my roommate and my cat in the hallway outside trying to stifle my laughter.

roommate: is there a problem?

cat: RAH!

roommate: oh no, is the door shut? did charlie lock you out of the bathroom?

cat: mweh...

roommate: well you see, i could fix that problem for you—

cat: MYEH!

roommate: —but due to social rules that you probably couldn't understand even if i explained them,

cat: gWAAH... mow..

roommate: yeah, dude, i hear you, but it's not gonna happen.

cat: MRRRR..!

roommate: i know i have opposable thumbs, but my hands are tied, thumbs and all. i'm sorry, i wish it didn't have to be this way.

[sound of roommate's door closing, followed by desperate scrabbling claws on the bathroom door]

[banchie]

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges

[puckplume]

my pick for hockey tweet of the day:

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

My phone sometimes does this "1 year ago" thing where it plays a reel of old photos to jazzy music, but I don't take all that many photos, so in practice my phone just sometimes offers me jazzy music over a series of context-free nearly identical photos of the neighbour's cat.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

I've seen a few posts lately that are like "how to avoid abuse as a housewife" and that's important but I want to say something from the kind-of-opposite-kind-of-the-same perspective:

if you thought you were signing up for a partnership of equals where you shared the responsibilities and financial burdens, the other person does not have the right to pressure or manipulate you into becoming The Breadwinner.

like, in my case it was super duper obvious that what my ex was doing was wrong because they would watch me come home from 50+ hours of work every week while they did three, and then expect me to do all the grocery shopping, cleaning, and life admin shit as well.

but even if they hadn't. even if they had decided to be The Housewife while I was The Breadwinner. that would still be bullshit because when we got married it was based on explicit agreement that we were planning to be a two-income, split-everything-equitably couple. no matter what, I didn't consent to burning myself out trying to provide for two people, and no one had the right to force me to do that.

what I'm getting at here is: just as it's manipulative and dangerous for your partner to demand you give up your job and focus everything on your home life for their benefit, it's also manipulative and dangerous for your partner to demand you work yourself to death so they can stay home.

[ordr]

Thanks for sexualizing peoples trauma fuckhead

anytime

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

You read stories about people being unable to accept ageing and crashing out by buying sports cars or pushing themselves too far athletically or whatever but my Refusal To Accept Ageing sticking point is that I just can't accept that I don't like sugar and junk food very much any more. I ate two chocolate muffins this morning and that was 1.75 muffins too many. I'm like "nooo I love sweet desserts I remember being super into sweet desserts" and the memories are from when I was like twelve. I like chicken salad now. I like carrot sticks. I eat carrot sticks and think "wow I'm really indulging today, carrots are one of the more sugary vegetables" and remind myself to make cucumber sticks next time. I bought a capsicum yesterday so that tonight I can eat plain white rice with charred capsicum and onion as a topping and I am genuinely looking forward to it. I MIGHT, if I am feeling adventurous, add a fresh tomato from the garden.

[cugzarui]

as a chemist i would like to say BWAHAHAHAHAHA

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Amazing that we call him the cookie clicker guy and not the "this website's hate mail game is insane" guy because one of those things had a much bigger impact on Tumblr culture than the other

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[starbrighte]

Limoges Porcelain Lucky Tangerine