Unbetitelt

21+ | Sports sideblog | Oilers Fan

[top-cheese]

being asked “oh you’re a hockey fan?” in real life feels reductive somehow. like ok yes i watch hockey but there’s also other things wrong with me

[mont-ventoux]

people who don’t watch sports are seriously missing out. You could all be so much angrier

[userfish]

baseball fights are better than hockey fights because everyone expects a fight in hockey. baseball fights are some real hater shit

[userfish]

ABSOLUTELY COMICAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[saggeses]

do you know how much of a hater you have to be to leap over a bullpen wall

[martypantone]

When John Tortorella invariably fucks up again and needs his image rehabilitated, I am going to pitch him my new feature film, Horse Hockey, a heartwarming coming of age story about Torts rescuing an orphaned foal and teaching it to play hockey, Air Bud style.

And obviously the horse is a beast on the ice, even more so under Tortorella’s rigorous coaching. I mean, can you imagine this thing on a breakaway?? Except he’s not the hard-hitting, physical brute that everyone in the league assumes he is. He’s sensitive. He’s patient. He’s got high hockey IQ and beautiful edge work. But the refs only see his size and his (ahem) pedigree, and the horse just keeps racking up the penalty minutes. Teams are starting to get worried he’s a liability, and Tortorella’s ever growing presence as the horse’s coach/agent/father is NOT helping.

In a pivotal game against their divisional rival, the horse gets a five minute major for boarding, and Torts is on the ice before he even registers his body moving, screaming at the refs that “it was clean hit! It’s not his fault he’s 17 hands high!!” But then he feels something on his waist. A hoof, somehow fitted with a hockey skate blade, pulls him back into the penalty box, and the horse whinnies softly until Torts stops his tirade and sits down, pacified. The entire arena looks on, dead silent, as Torts starts reflexively smoothing his fingers through the horse’s beautiful mane, the way he used to every night when the horse was still too young and afraid to leave his side.

And as his horse son looks at him with his big, wet horse eyes and places his big, warm horse head onto his shoulder, John has a realization. He may have taught the horse about stick handling and face offs, but the horse taught him something even more important. The horse taught John Tortorella how to be a little bit more human.

[ryancartersummer]

if I was a professional hockey player you could not media train me enough to keep me from saying "do you wanna see the bruise??" to reporters asking about a hit I took. & then showing it to them

[trans1oa]

celly oat

[raccoonhockey]

god I love when guys block shots and you see every molecule in their body try to resist it and they flinch but they still take it

[dilftanger]

don’t date. a sports team can also let you down for the rest of your life and doesn’t move into your house.

[sockenpuppe]

right next to the refs lol

MTL @ BUF | playoffs round 2, game 7

[vingtcoeurs]

never getting over this btw

[jesperwallstedts]

Montreal Canadiens @ Buffalo Sabres ⤷ May 18, 2026 | Second Round Game 7

[daysofsteel]

Daily playoff hockey affirmations

It is normal and fine to want to peel your skin off

The great evil shall be defeated

I am a normal guy and I can watch hockey like a normal person

i am not being hunted for sport

its okay to cast spells on hockey teams

the great evil shall be quelled

the great evil is not pervasive

i like hockey and hockey is fun

i am not being hunted for sport

[lesbian-stick-handling]

Interviews with hockey players are fantastic, because it is a complex game that can be spoken about at length, but during the intermission they'll find the Wettest player imaginable on the losing team and for thirty seconds they'll ask them things like "what do you need to do to get more pucks in the net?" And the player (panting, haunted behind the eyes) says something like "well, we've got to get them in there"

[transcmd]

how much can one girl take

[meatculture]

[oscarmeowstri]

and it always comes back to this

[wmnylander]

Maple Leafs @ Flyers

November 1st, 2025