there’s a special kind of grief you feel towards yourself when you’ve been mentally ill for as long as you remember. you see ppl saying they long to return to their old self but you don’t have an old self, or if there was, you can’t remember it. ur “old self” was a child. this self is all you’ve ever known. then there’s the fear that comes with trying to find out who you are without your mental illnesses, it’s all new to you and you don’t know if you’ll like who you’ll be
























