Anti-Recovery Is Out

The new mood is trying your best

[anarchistmemedistro]

[nerdyqueerandjewish]

Chill Goal Setting

Migrating to a new computer and looking at some of my files. I wrote this summary up awhile ago based on how goal setting is talked about in Codependent No More. Thought the timing was good and that others might enjoy!

Purpose With this type of goal setting, the focus is on being curious about and connecting with one's self, increasing awareness, providing a sense of direction, and finding opportunities for joy. This type of goal setting is NOT focused on productivity or accomplishment.

Who might like it Those of us who struggle with being aware of or acknowledging our wants/needs/desires, people wanting to get to know themselves better, people who struggle with people pleasing or perfectionism

Brainstorming - What do you want in your life today? This week? This month? This year? - What problems do you want to address? (you don't need to know the solution to them, finding a solution is a good goal) - What material things would you like to have? - What changes do you want to make in yourself? Why do you want these things? Make sure your intentions align with your values

Watch out for ...

Goals that are actually for other people.

Perfectionism

"Should"s (these goals are about your desires, not what other people expect of you)

Example goals:

Things: a new sweater, longer hair, concert tickets

Places: going to a local park, checking out new restaurant, traveling

Relational: improving relationship with friends, family, or partner

Big life changes: going back to school, changing careers

Personal skills - make a decision about something, learning to set boundaries

start dating, make a new friend

Don't limit yourself. Don't feel the need to be "realistic." Don't exclude things that feel "unimportant." Even if you think the goal will never be reached, there is still value in acknowledging what you want. I sometimes feel afraid of my desires, like that if I start acknowledging them, an unending amount will pour out of me and I'll never feel satisfied with anything. Acknowledging all of these shows me that this isn't true.

Now what? This is basically the opposite of "S.M.A.R.T" goals. Do what you feel inspired to do, one day at a time. Listen to your intuition. The point of this is not to get a list done as quickly as possible - the purpose is to be curious and connect with ourselves.

Add new goals as needed. Remove goals that no longer fit you. Cross off goals as you reach them. Be aware of the ebb and flow of life, and give yourself time to rest. Be patient. Its okay if something stays on your list for years or never is completed.

[vexheart]

[mortalityplays]

hi, a lot of you need a perspective reset

the average human lifespan globally is 70+ years

taking the threshold of adulthood as 18, you are likely to spend at least 52 years as a fully grown adult

at the age of 30 you have lived less than one quarter of your adult life (12/52 years)

'middle age' is typically considered to be between 45-65

it is extremely common to switch careers, start new relationships, emigrate, go to college for the first or second time, or make other life-changing decisions in middle age

it's wild that I even have to spell it out, but older adults (60+) still have social lives and hobbies and interests.

you can still date when you get old. you can still fuck. you can still learn new skills, be fashionable, be competitive. you can still gossip, you can still travel, you can still read. you can still transition. you can still come out.

young doesn't mean peaked. you're inexperienced in your 20s! you're still learning and practicing! you're developing social skills and muscle memory that will last decades!

there are a million things to do in the world, and they don't vanish overnight because an imaginary number gets too big

[passion-of-l0vers]

They should make a Killing Myself that doesn't Kill Me

sometimes i close my eyes and pretend i’m dead and can’t tell my friends i care about them or hang out with my siblings or draw or get high or jerk off or eat a perfect mango or see a sunset or write in my journal or post on tumblr or listen to music or read or write or anything every again and everyone who cares about me has to deal with my death and i can’t even tell them that i miss them. and then i imagine through some miracle i get another chance at life. and i open my eyes and realize that i’m alive again!

not quite the same but it works for me 👍

[passion-of-l0vers]

[happyk44]

[ID: 1. Quote from Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte: Heaven did not seem to be my home; and I broke my heart with weeping to come back to earth; and the angels were so angry that they flung me out into the middle of the heath on the top of Wuthering Heights; where I woke sobbing for joy.

2. Scene from the 1947 film, It’s A Wonderful Life. George leans against the bridge railing. “Please, I want to live again. I want to live again,” he prays. He drops his face to his fists. “I want to live again. Please, God, let me live again.”

3. Quote from Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf: So he was deserted. The whole world was clamouring: Kill yourself, kill yourself, for our sakes. But why should he kill himself for their sakes? Food was pleasant; the sun hot; and this killing oneself, how does one set about it, with a table knife, uglily, with floods of blood, - by sucking a gaspipe? He was too weak; he could scarcely raise his hand. Besides, now that he was quite alone, condemned, deserted, as those who are about to die are alone, there was a luxury in it, an isolation full of sublimity; a freedom which the attached can never know. Holmes has won of course, the brute with the red nostrils had won. But even Holmes himself could not touch this last relic straying on the edge of the world, this outcast, who gazed back at the inhabited regions, who lay, like a drowned sailor, on the sore of the world. /end ID]

[passion-of-l0vers]

actually the future will be kinda cool i’ll have read more books and watched more movies and listened to more music and written more journal entries. the themes and motifs in my brain will be epic!!!!!!!

[hug-your-face]

via @swatercolor [insta]

[hug-your-face]

This is the best tag I've ever received on a post, I think

[etherealspacejelly]

this is your gentle reminder to stop fighting against your adhd and instead structure your life around it

buy a pack of chapsticks and put one in the pocket of all of your coats and jackets because you always forget to bring one and chapped lips is sensory hell

leave important things where you can see them. if they go in a box or a drawer you will forget they exist

put any appointments or deadlines in your phone calendar As Soon As you get them. set a reminder for a week before, a day before, an hour before, as many as you need as often as you need them.

when that little voice in your head says "i dont need to write that down, ill remember it" that is the devil talking!!! write it down anyway!!

plan for down time. have a few hours at the end of every day to just do fun stuff like engage in your hyperfixations. even if you didnt get all of your work done that day, have the rest anyway. you probably spent the whole day beating yourself up for not doing what you Should be doing, so you still need the break.

if you never eat vegetables because its too much effort to chop and cook them, get the frozen or canned shit. it doesnt go off for ages and you just have to microwave it. theres no point buying fresh vegetables if they just keep going off and being left to rot in the bottom of your fridge

if you struggle to decide what to have for dinner every day, take the decision out of it. choose a set of meals and eat those on rotation until you get sick of them, then choose some new ones and do it again.

its not stupid if it works! our brains literally have a chemical deficiency. you are allowed to accommodate yourself. go forth and stop making your life more difficult than it has to be because "this shouldn't be this hard". it is hard, so make it easier.

[should-be-sleeping]

You are allowed to accommodate yourself.

[swamp-spirit]

My dog's really a study in Buddhism. He can see my muffin wrapper and he's miserable. Crying. He needs to eat my muffin wrapper so bad.

I get up and throw it away. He forgets about it immediately and happily goes to sleep.

You are not sad because you do not have a muffin wrapper, my beautiful boy, you are sad because you want the muffin wrapper.

[liminalbeauty]

That’s actually pretty deep. Excellent explanation.

[apocryphics]

oh ok

[gorps]

[exeuntstormtroopers]

“Why would you stop in hell?” has changed my brain chemistry

[animentality]

[anxeious]

[sesamie]

learning that addiction is a progressive narrowing of the range of things that make one happy was kinda life changing for me. i apply it to everything not even just addiction i am always checking to ask if i am narrowing my range of happiness or widening it

[argumate]

always good to check whether your coping strategy has become something that needs its own coping strategies

[rythms-of-synthax-deactivated20]

Quote of the day

[brosser-les-dents]

We may not want to brush our teeth, but we like the way it feels when are teeth are clean.

[sesamie]

learning that addiction is a progressive narrowing of the range of things that make one happy was kinda life changing for me. i apply it to everything not even just addiction i am always checking to ask if i am narrowing my range of happiness or widening it

[dogwise]

PRACTICE URGE SURFING

[dogwise]

[mortalityplays]

hi, a lot of you need a perspective reset

the average human lifespan globally is 70+ years

taking the threshold of adulthood as 18, you are likely to spend at least 52 years as a fully grown adult

at the age of 30 you have lived less than one quarter of your adult life (12/52 years)

'middle age' is typically considered to be between 45-65

it is extremely common to switch careers, start new relationships, emigrate, go to college for the first or second time, or make other life-changing decisions in middle age

it's wild that I even have to spell it out, but older adults (60+) still have social lives and hobbies and interests.

you can still date when you get old. you can still fuck. you can still learn new skills, fashionable, be competitive. you can still gossip, you can still travel, you can still read. you can still transition. you can still come out.

young doesn't mean peaked. you're inexperienced in your 20s! you're still learning and practicing! you're developing social skills and muscle memory that will last decades!

there are a million things to do in the world, and they don't vanish overnight because an imaginary number gets too big