This is my latest redesign for an alternative hardcover edition of the first Captive Prince book.
My initial inspiration came from one of Quel’s artworks (this one), and I completely fell in love with the idea of a red version. But I couldn’t resist seeing how it would look in blue, too… and now I think I’ve ended up with two versions that I genuinely can’t choose between!
I think so many people are so deeply alienated from themselves that they have no clue how to exercise their free will and autonomy. For some, this alienation runs so deep that they are afraid of their own autonomy and humanity. It is completely understandable why one would have those feelings, but it can be worrisome.
I want to help others who feel this way, so here are small things I have done to exercise my free will:
Add "guilty pleasure" songs to playlists and actually listen to them (I have a ton of late 1990s-early 2000s music I listen to now proudly that I never listened to in the past out of shame)
Getting the décor item, bath set, bed spread, ect. in the patterns you like, even if it's "childish" (I got a dinosaur-themed wastebasket from the kids' décor section and I adore it)
Taking a new route to get to a place you go to often
Eat dessert first
Celebrate well, and often
Collect things that are "odd" or don't seem like an "acceptable" thing to collect (somebody on my "for you" page collects dandelion crayola crayons and it was so cool!!!!!!)
Incorporate one new piece in an outfit you wear frequently (e.g., a new chain, a necklace, ribbons, bracelets, ect.). Challenge yourself to add onto the outfits if you feel up for it.
Sing along to songs without worrying that you sound "good" or your intonation is completely accurate
Read a book from a genre you weren't allowed to read as a kid (comics, thrillers, mysteries, anything!)
Walk without having a specific destination or goal
Pick up a new craft without expecting yourself to master it or to ever be "good" enough. Get your hands messy.
I don't want to shame anybody for not feeling as though they have free will or that they are exempt from exercising it. However, I wanted to give ideas so that you might read this list and find your own ways to express your intrinsic autonomy and will. You deserve to be a person, to feel alive, not just living. That is what our lives are for.
*At a Round Table Meeting without Merlin, cause he doesn't have a seat yet*
Percival: I'm half druid, but I follow their ways as best I can.
Everyone:*shocked*
Mordred, panicking and in solidarity: I too, am a druid, but a full one.
Everyone:*even more shocked*
Mordred, panicked, moving towards Pervical protectively: I won't let you hurt him!
Everyone: *looks at Arthur*
Arthur: *feels offended*
Merlin, has slept seven hour in the past week, super sleep deprived: *stumbles in with a serving table, looking five seconds away from passing out*
Percival, blurting out and panicked: I'M A DRUID!
Mordred, through mind link: Percival and I told everyone we're druids.
Merlin: *looks confused then determined*
Merlin: Which deity do you worship?
Percival, thrown: What?
Merlin, vaguely annoyed: Come on, Percy, there's only one wrong answer.
Percival:*confused then relived then suspicious*
Percival: It's Emrys.
Merlin, who is Emrys: You shouldn't worship him. He—
Percival, defensively: Why? Because he has magic?
Merlin, sleep deprived and confused: No? Cause he doesn't deserve your worship. He is unworthy of it. Like what has he even done?
Percival:
Merlin: Trust me, he's unreliable and should not be worshiped...
Percival:
Mordred, whispering to Percival: Don't bother, he's very convinced with this.
Merlin cont.:...infact just ask Mordred! ...Or well, maybe not, he doesn't listen. He's too stubborn.
Merlin cont.: There ask so many better options, like the Morrigan or... well, Caillaech is not the best example... but the Triple Goddess is! Why don't you worship the Triple Goddess?
Alternative cover design for the Captive Prince trilogy!!!
I wanted to experiment with a different color palette for this edition, and I ended up really loving the result. The idea was to keep the same cover layout across all three books, changing only the colors while using the same arabesque endpaper pattern throughout the trilogy to create a cohesive visual identity.
For now, it’s just a concept. I’m still deciding whether to print this version or my more recent redesign 🤔
who on earth is out there waking up early to get shit done??? the purpose of waking up early is to have QUIET TIME LOUNGING IN BED before the world gets LOUD & ANNOYING AS FUCK
What if, after the Poisoned Chalice incident, Merlin hears about Arthur's acceptance of his little magic light, of his belief that someone guarded him through it, and...
Whenever Merlin needs to magic them away from some danger, or to lead Arthur somewhere, he just sneakily summons the light and - poof - it has Arthur's complete trust!
Bandits? Magic light ball knocks them out. A strange ravine? Well, magic light ball did it. They're trapped somewhere? Don't worry, Arthur would tell his knights, a magic light ball will rescue us.
It goes for longer than it should, years and years of mishaps and miraculous rescues.
Until Arthur asks the light ball to heal his father and sees Merlin's eyes lighting up when the ball touches the wound.
Three years ago today, our beloved band The Round Table released their debut album, Camelot, baby!
Written between classes, after shifts, in tiny rehearsal rooms with broken amps and too much ambition, it stayed for days at the top # 1!
“We didn’t know if anyone would ever hear it, we were expecting only our friends and family to care. Three years later, the world is still listening. It's more than we could ever expect, we're insanely grateful for everyone that gave it a try. Thank you," says Elyan Smith in his twitter post
[band au posting. this is the artwork I made for their first ever album!!]
I keep getting reminded that people think of Gwaine as a drunk who is always trying to get out of responsibility, and sure that’s how he appears when he’s in a group, but I firmly believe that Gwaine is never his truer self than when he’s with Merlin alone.
I think Gwaine, maybe even subconsciously, is pushing away those who he thinks won’t deem him worthy of care by using his carefree attitude as the thing to be pointed and laughed at instead of his real self. Something to put distance between those who would make fun of him and his true self so he wouldn't have to actually deal with the fall out of people finding him annoying.
Only after Merlin had proven that he was never going to laugh at him in any way but when he was already laughing at himself, did Gwaine start opening up to him. Merlin had proven to be a safe person to Gwaine, (as Gwaine had proven to be for Merlin but that's a story for another time) and so we get the slow dribble of sadness that infects Gwaine's life more than he could say only through those moments when they are alone.
And after that he actively asks Merlin to give him more responsibilities. He comes every time Merlin asks him too, despite whatever is happening in his own life, he goes to Merlin when he knows he is upset and waits in the quiet without making a sound, and tells him 'I'm here for you, please let me be here for you.'
He never goes back on that. He never pushes too hard, but he is always ready when Merlin calls. He deems himself responsible for Merlin's safety and he never wavers on that.
Merlin shows him what it is to hold something above yourself. To be a person who would devote your life to a cause bigger than you.
And well, when Gwaine's with the group of the knights and Arthur, they had already shown him they would do the exact opposite and proven that they couldn't even be trusted with the smallest piece of himself without having them point and laugh. So of course he would retreat into a persona. That way he can have that excuse to point at when it does start to hurt.
"Oh, they're not laughing at you, they're laughing at who you pretend to be."
And so you get this character that seems like he's shallow and one noted, have these hugely emotional beats with Merlin. You see how their closeness is careful and soft and quiet instead of the loud, rambunctious, messes they both pretend to be for both of their safety.
And that's how I see Gwaine as a character. Living in these hushed moment, ready to tackle any situation with thoughtfulness, forced by his own mind to act out. Only in his truest form with Merlin there.
the natural lifespan of a fandom is unlimited. when well tended a fandom can be functionally immortal. and yet everywhere you look you see newly bred fandoms withering and dying when they’re barely a year old. barely even six months old. fans are looking at their six month old fandoms and saying i think it’s on its last legs, should i euthanise it? when with the proper care that fandom could outlive them for decades. it’s sad. sad state of affairs we’re in.
nobody UNDERSTANDS this post!! this is NOT about feeling BAD and watching your COMFORT show!!! this is about feeling FINE but then CHOOSING to watch a show that makes you want to KILL YOUR SELF
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