AlliumNight

I will steal your cat

[copperbadge]

On Saturday I said to my partner, as I have said for months, "A ten thousand dollar a year raise would solve so many of my problems."

As of this morning I was reluctantly looking for jobs because I love my job and don't want to leave it, but see: $10k raise problem solver.

As of noon today this was no longer an issue, because my boss called me with the news that I was getting a $10K merit raise.

I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. This is roughly $200 extra per paycheck. Enough to pay off debt faster, rebuild my savings, and spend a weekend a month in Milwaukee getting obscenely laid. The sex I'm going to have on $200 extra per paycheck. You can't even.

May all of you get the $10K raise your soul has yearned for. And whatever level of sex you can be satisfied with for $200.

[vergess]

hey bestie i think ur post might be charmed 'cause you aren't gonna fuckin believe what happened today

[fairycosmos]

a small thing i learned from my sister dying is that i really would rather the people i love be a burden than be whatever the hell else they'd be if they weren't. yes even if it's messy and not always fair and hard completely inconvenient for everyone involved. even if it's weird. even if i'm rolling my eyes a bit inside sometimes. i just want you to bother me. please always bother me

[fairycosmos]

like "it's rotten work" "not to me not if it's you" actually sometimes it's still rotten work. even if it's you. and i'd still do it a million times over

[burgerdotcom]

reblogs were off

[popsunner]

Was just informed by my mom that I do in fact have ADHD and the reason I thought I didn’t was because ever since I was seven whenever I got super energetic my mom would have me go chop wood so now when I’m feeling The ADHD I go chop wood and I thought it was just some sort of routine I started when I was little and wanted to blow off steam

[popsunner]

I’d also like to point out that my sister has a really hard time staying present (I can’t remember the term because we’ve always called it Tethered at my house) and whenever she’s feeling Untethered my mom has her knead bread and make syrup because they’re repetitive and easy things to do that ground her

[popsunner]

Now that I’m thinking about it- my brother has days where he doesn’t talk and doesn’t eat unless he’s prompted, and on those days my mom sits him down in the fish pond in the backyard and plays Mozart and because he’s so used to that being his wake up he always comes back in after like an hour rambling about random things

[popsunner]

Oh yeah and when it rains my mom has a required hour where we all have to go outside and run around and whoever finds the most worms for the garden wins and then we go inside and my mom makes us tea and we watch Studio Ghibli movies

[popsunner]

Wait!!! When one of us has a bad day at school we make a fire in the backyard and roast homemade sausages and my mom tells us stories until we laugh and then she tucks is in bed like we’re five again and sings us songs

[popsunner]

Uh.... wait guys is my mom a witch raising a bunch of fae kids hold on-

[eldritch-eternity]

“I didn’t know I had adhd because my mom gave me such an effective coping mechanism” is such a high bar to clear and she soared over it like a space-plane.

[puppyrex8]

Summarized most of the different Rocky fanart styles

He varies intensely but he’s still the same ol Eridian!!

(8/9 of me posting most of my PHM art at once)

[taumoebros]

mysterious next door neighbors~

bonus:

[jwowo]

[ninalinovna]

"if you need me, just yell. i'll hear you." 😌

[nancywheelesbian]

Re that last post I’m thinking about Steve dating someone who showed his nudes to the whole basketball team. So when he does it for Eddie he just assumes that the entirety of corroded coffin is gonna see him naked but it’s a small price to pay

[nancywheelesbian]

Crucially he does not voice this until one day when he randomly drops “well all the guys have seen my dick already right?”

[somequeerbitch]

Eddie is so flabbergasted that he barely manages a "what?!" and quickly recovers when his next question pops in his head "why would you have shown them your dick? Did you all go skinny dipping without me?! Why are you even asking me that?"

Steve is more confused than he is relieved, because skinny dipping is Eddie's knee-jerk second question

[nancywheelesbian]

Steve: Why would we go skinny dipping?? Didn’t you show them my nudes??

Eddie: WHY WOULD I SHOW THEM YOUR NUDES

[alnat-art]

[soleilsplanet]

do you ever just … picture a whole scene, a whole fanfiction in your head, you know how to place every single word of the english dictionary that you need (or your language dictionary), you know how to structure your sentences, you know just what your characters are going to say to each other and then… and then you just open microsoft word.

[the-adults-are-talk1ng]

Its the doc! The blank document steals the ideas from. Your brain!!!! If you want to keep your ideas,, do NOT look at the doc when you open it, look STRAIGHT* AT THE KEYBOARD and write the first words to pop into your head! Once the document isn't empty it, takes away its evil power over you

[rabbitindisguise]

two things:

the mental image of that is hilarious

it might just work

[ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa]

For those who don't contain a vast knowledge of Green Day lore like myself, I don't think it is hitting just how much of a "fuck you" the NFL is giving djt/the white house. This is a band that is:

Made entirely of openly bisexual/queer men

Made entirely of men who are vocal about being raised by single mothers on welfare

One of their members was adopted and raised by a Black woman and has said he "understands how his mother could hate 'the white man' and love him with her whole soul."

Were the first band to say, "No Trump, No KKK, No Fascist/MAGA U.S.A." on live television without ANY warning.

Literally released a song last year called, "The American Dream Is Killing Me"

Only hires ALL FEMALE bands to open for them to address inequality in the music industry

OPENLY tells trump supporters they are not welcome at their concerts.

Anyway, Enjoy Feb. 8th Magats! You're gonna hate it. :)

[posttexasstressdisorder]

[cozy-stardust]

Imagine Grace defined his name as the elegance definition of grace and Rocky spends years thinking how fucking ironic this clumsy leaky space blobs name is.

Until Grace slips out a sentence along the lines of "could you give me a little grace here" and Rocky immediately points out he used a word wrong so Grace has to explain that yeah, grace means elegance but it can also mean mercy sometimes too.

And Rocky has to suddenly reconcile that the clumsy leaky blob that saved his life twice, that almost certainly doomed himself to come back for him, name is Mercy.

[till-dawn-do-us-part]

[wolfythewitch]

Phm doodle requests from twt

[kittenscookie]

I'M BACK ON THIS AU BITCH, LUKE RAISED BY MODERN EPIC HERMES

*Luke and Percy looking through the flight shoes M.E Hermes has given Luke over the years*

Percy: So I can really take a pair with me?

Luke: Yeah take your pick!

Percy: *Grabs a pair* What about these—?

Luke: *Rips them out of his hands* NO NOT THOSE THEY'LL TAKE YOU STRAIGHT TO TARTARUS!

Percy: ...Isn't Tartarus, like, super hell...?

Luke: It is indeed.

Percy: ...Luke?

Luke: ...Percy.

Percy: ...Why do you have a pair of shoes that can send someone to super hell...?

Luke: ...*Hands him a safe pair* Good luck on your quest kid!

Percy: Have you sent someone to super hell before!?

Luke: *Pushing him out the door* Try not to die!

[mo0nbugs]

In a lot of folklore, faries are hurt by or reppeled by iron

Concept:

Due to Bilbos' fae heritage, he's allergic to iron.

He would say it irritates his skin, but truthfully, it burns him. Even small brushes against the metal make it look like he was burned by a hot brand for days.

He obviously doesn't think to bring it up with anyone. It didn't seem important until Thorin's hand gently brushed the back of his, and Bilbo pulled back with a hiss.

Thorin stared wide-eyed (and a little heartbroken) for a second until he spotted the strip of red skin Bilbo was trying to hide.

"You're hurt, when did that happen?" Thorin went to take the hobbits hand for a better look, but Bilbo skittered back in a slight panic.

"Ah no it-It..well I think it was your ring," Bilbo said.

"My ring?"

Bilbo revealed the small rectangular burn on the back of his freckled hand and Thorin had to bite back a gasp.

"I'm allergic to iron you see, it ma-"

Before Bilbo could even finish the sentence, Thorin had wrenched his ring off his finger and thrown it with all his might into the forest.

Bilbo couldn't quite find his words for a few minutes as he stared slack jawed in the direction the ring had vanished into.

Thorin had just thrown off his ring. Thrown it. His ring he had worn every day Bilbo had known the dwarf. He just threw it into some bushes and would likely never see hide or hair of it again.

Because it had hurt him.

[cherryhatter-deactivated2015072]

KICK THE CAN!

Let’s play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.

To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.

[visibun]

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

[drtanner]

And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!