there's no perfect time, so why not today? @ambiguousfiction - Tumblr Blog

cell phone doesn't like water because it is a combination of the other three elements. it is a rock (earth) that we fill with lightning (fire) that can control radio waves (air). if it contained water too, it would be too perfect; it would be like a god. to prevent this, the universe kills the would be uniter-of-the-elements. it's basic science.

heronbrew

Hey op google what LCD stands for

tagfer

i took an oath in third grade to never do drugs

gaudebo

tip: if you wake up on time and then lie in bed unmoving for 20 minutes you will no longer be on time

local-lesbian-tree-demon

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of

muppetshow2026

you may think misogyny is good because it is made up of miso, which is delicious, and gyny, which is woman. and girl miso sounds great. but 👆 it is not girl miso

getbentdaily-deactivated2025122

"Miso" is Greek for "hatred". "Gyny" is Greek for "woman" Misogyny literally means "hatred of women".

The word "misogyny" is always associated with the unnecessary hatred and abuse of women. No one ever thinks about this word in a positive light.

muppetshow2026

will you ever forgive me

muppetshow2026

jesus christ did i fucking kill them im sorry

tobiasdrake

you may think homicide is good because it is made up of homo, which is gay, and cider, which is delicious. And gay cider sounds great. but 👆 it is not gay cider

infestuous

have yall heard about the 17lb cannibal cat named Baby Jesus

infestuous

thats a big a boy

damnhotpocket

Gema.piano on instagram

Why are all music teachers like this 😭😭😭

communeist

THEY ARE

crematedequally

when i was 8 i had a very intimidating russian woman as a music teacher- she was both my opera instructor and piano teacher. about a month into piano, she sat me down and said to my mother and i "this child- very beautiful voice, good for singing. i will not allow this child to continue piano. god did not want this child to play an instrument. he told me this in dreams. that is all."

my mom had it written down on a slip so we could remember the exact words because it was so funny. i HATED playing piano and i was definitely not good at it (i did end up having a good 5 years of opera training and ended up being a pretty accomplished choir singer though) and the idea of god sending my incredibly severe and serious russian piano teacher a dream begging her to stop teaching me piano was probably the funniest way it could have gone.

beardedmrbean

Congratulations on the cat

innerchildabortionclinic

goes on shark tank empty handed and says good evening sharks. none of us are leaving this room alive

#why did I actually witness something like this last night #a charity I'm involved in was raising money at a shark tank style event where there's a bunch of rich folk to pitch too #talking abt how you'll have the most impact and whatever #and the event is ran by volunteers which is cool cos it means all the money goes to charity #but at the end of the event they're just like “so we need 10 new volunteers and noone is leaving until we have them”#and over the course of a very painful 10ish minutes ten people were successful peer pressured into volunteering

sreegs

I usually disable all the health stuff in the iPhone Health app but i opened it today check something completely unrelated when i decided to scroll down the "All Health Data" section and i've apparently fallen down a lot?? on one day in January 2015 in particular

sreegs

scale time

the number above is 1.00e81 (1 with 81 zeros).

There's 86,400 seconds in a day. A femtosecond is one quadrillionth of a second. there are 8.64e19 femtoseconds in a day. i would have to fall down at least 1e61 times per quadrillionth of a second to reach that number

sreegs

apparently a fall creates 2-4kN of force so lets split the difference and say 3kN so thats 3e81 kN of cumulative force applied over a 24 hour period to roughly, i dunno a square meter or two. i have no idea how to quantify that but im pretty sure that's an erosive force that can move mountains

presuming im invincible, i dont think the elasticity of like, granite can even keep up with the frequency of the impact. interesting conundrum

sreegs

i failed to consider the speed involved here in order to fall 1e81 times in a 24h period.

i'm 178cm tall, and in order to fall repeatedly, you have to get back up again (isnt there a song about this?) so one complete fall cycle is 356 cm, or 0.00356 km.

i traveled 0.00356km 1e81 times so thats 3.56e78 km/day, so 86400 seconds in a day thats 4.12037037037e73 km/sec.

i have absolutlely annihilated everything and broken the speed of light, which is a measly 299,792.458 km/sec. everything is gone. everything.