hoo boy do i need to update this theme

30s/any pronouns

[kabber]

[red-garden]

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

[symdog]

back at it again at krispy kreme

[micromontage]

😏😁 🏃🤸🤸💥–

[mrsterlingeverything]

We’re gonna be painting this shit on the town walls when the big solar flare happens

[v171]

Alien gender binary.

[ontopofgravity]

I asked one of my (male) friends to stop using the phrase “man up” and he has been using “fortify” for the past two weeks instead and it’s just a little thing but honestly it makes a difference

and tbh it’s also pretty funny when I start to deflate in the library and he leans over and goes “FORTIFY”

[teakayblog]

Dude, fortify is bangin’. That makes things like you’re some kind of RPG character. Fortify is way better than “man up.”

[auspiciousleader]

Happy 10th anniversary to Fortify

[mxmuffin]

I love this gif. Me when I need my stool

[moveslikekeithrichards]

nsfw = nosfewatu

[maykitz]

remember how utterly inescapable how i met your mother used to be with the memes and references and barney and bro code and wait for it... and then the finale was so hated it vanished overnight

[mozilla-firefucks]

The finale so successfully erased the show from public consciousness, that when people tried to come up with a name for the "extremely popular show with finale so bad that people just immediately stop talking about it" phenomenon, people called it... the Game of Thrones Effect. HIMYM got memoryholed so hard that people forgot it even existed

[akashicrecord]

Hey! Wanna fuck? Meet me on MyChart....

[fangs-4-fags]

guy who cares way too much about proper animal husbandry and is annoying to do petplay bdsm scenes with

[fangs-4-fags]

you've been a bad dog... what? no, i'm not gonna punish you. animals respond better to positive reinforcement. you should know that. i've only talked about it a thousand times.

[seriousjones]

when someone at my 4th of july barbeque tries to stop me from fitting another firecracker into my ass

[newtype-exe]

Kid with a bluey backpack on the flight to Sydney this must be his mecca

[bumblebeebats]

How is it that you can a music library of like 1,200+ absolute bangers but as soon as you put it on shuffle in a group setting it's like. anime opening you added in 2010. homestuck parody song. musical artist who was cancelled last year for kidnapping and eating children in his basement. Hamilton

[gammadoppler]

kids turning seven right now in this world lived through something beyond magical.

[gammadoppler]

if i turned seven this year and didnt get a six seven cake when my friends did i think i'd go evil and start throwing tables and shit

[becquerel]

what if we both had the same name and were discussing the rpf status of the mayor of new york

[daily-memory-of-touch]

You thought this was a rabbit? They thought this was a rabbit. That's fucking funny bitch, this is fucking Winnie the fucking Pooh. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck 4th of July

[draconym]

Coca Cola flavored Oreos taste like if you could eat clipart

[draconym]

These taste like an abstract concept. Summer Vacation flavored. Yankee Candle ass cookie.

[errant-light]

this just keeps being relevant

[thelawfulchaotic]

This skit absolutely slaps forever but I have to tell you guys the secret.

The weird Oreos don’t sell… but the weird Oreos just being around and visible make people buy more regular Oreos.

That’s why.

[draconym]

The weird Oreos DO sell, but my housemate is the one buying them all

[unfavorableinstigation]

I think they add an important element of randomness to the environment. My father in law bought 6 or 7 boxes of the Selena Gomez Oreos so he could set a Selena Gomez Oreo alarm to go off mid workday and then say to his coworkers, "Oh, my Selena Gomez Oreo alarm is going off!" and unearth from his locker his 6 or 7 boxes of Selena Gomez Oreos so he and his coworkers could distribute them around the neonatal ICU ward where they work. He said it livened up an otherwise extremely dreary day.