handicapable 🦾

23 | crazy cat lady™️ | ♀

[gayward-vagabond]

My favorite trope is “janitor in headphones continues cleaning through extreme action”

[adultdadfinder]

I’ve been the janitor in headphones and trust me it’s an act we just don’t wanna be involved in the nonsense

[thememedaddy]

[presidentdragon]

"that time of the month" "monthly visitor" "feminine hygiene products" GRRAH!!! SHUT UP SHUT UP!!! PERIOD!! MENSTRUATION!!!! TAMPONS!!! PADS!! MENOPAUSE!!!!!!!!!!!

[tyke-dyke]

VAGINA!!!!

[presidentdragon]

[lastoneout]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring

[krystal-prisms]

Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

So after extensive interrogation I have an update:

my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.

the truth is actually weirder

she’s aware dandelions look like this

she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions

she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?

she answered, with complete confidence: Daffodils.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

gosh I enjoy this website

[authoratmidnight]

For comparison, this is a daffodil

[quietlygrousing]

See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i don’t think so? i’m southern and buttercups are what we call these things (much tinier)

[maejacrezz007]

Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???

[fractiousrvt]

This is an Easter Lily. It is an actual lily and therefore deadly to cats.

[blood-trip-god2]

They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!

[delphinidin4]

This is a marigold:

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u

[icouldshowyoumyscar]

Gif from the video above by Neil Bromhall (at 1500% speed)

[thememedaddy]

[thememedaddy]

[blckgirlacid]

I need my weird alone time or I will explode

[kibibarel]

[thememedaddy]

[thememedaddy]

[springbreak1984]

[thememedaddy]

[onlinebeast]

DOWNLOADING MILK …

1% …

2% …

DOWNLOAD COMPLETE .

[iamoutofideas]

*puts my cigarettes out on you*

[frogmoss1]

*wuickly smokes it all before you can reach me*

[iamoutofideas]

oh a wise guy huh? *rolls up my sleeves* why I oughta…

[frogmoss1]

*wuickly rolls your sleeves back down before you can hit me*

[discreet45]

[aflo]

Attempting to locate a new Greek restaraunt using my gyroscope

[wiionme]