BitesYouBitesYou BitesYou

Adult | 20s | We live forever and we love to live 🐀 | Terfs, transphobes, facists, other varieties of horrible people blocked on sight | Technically a side blog used as main cause mine broke:(

[vedurnan-archive]

I don’t have followers. I have Sweeties,Darlings.. I don’t have any followers.

[chicknwire]

I love tumblr more than IG bc IG feels like I’m posting looking for a job but on here it’s like I already lost the job and my wife and the house and I’m just sitting on the curb talking to myself

[not100bees]

The thing about Miss Piggy is that she kind of has a Roger Rabbit comedy superpower where she wins nearly any conceivable fight she's in. But unlike other characters of which that's true, like say, Bugs Bunny, who tend to win because they make the opponent play the game with their rules, Miss Piggy wins because the joke is that she can beat the shit out of literally anybody.

[not100bees]

Bugs Bunny beats Thanos by setting up an airport and making him take off the Infinity Gauntlet to go through the metal detector.

Miss Piggy beats Thanos by karate chopping him in the face and sending him flying.

[wizardshark]

99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!

[saspitite]

FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME

BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND

PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING

[elizapad]

Happy Pride, cave dwellers 🦇

[segamascott]

what if it was called american happy story

[segamascott]

[segamascott]

[orcboxer]

excuse me

[thewitchoftheweast]

[avaricevinegar]

no pants im afraid

[xtec]

This is what the average YouTube thumbnail looks like now

[noneuclideangarf]

spent too long on this

[amazoogle]

i set my name to Paul Enis in the app because then the stickers they put on my grocery deliveries would say P. ENIS. it was like this for months, but now all the sudden they say PAUL E. instead

i can't have that. i won't let that happen. what they could have never predicted is that a beautiful woman named Peni Sausage is about to log on

[uncertainlys]

MY FINGERS BARELY EVEN TOUCHED YOUR STUPID FUCKING AD STOP REDIRECTING ME TO THE APP STORE

[probuccalfat]

i have a Persian agenda where i encourage every man i know to grow the longest and prettiest hair possible

[probuccalfat]

personal agenda. Personal.

[argentcochon]

[probuccalfat]

i’m speechless. there’s a guy for everything.

[samdyke]

dude your cw show fucking bit me

[evilnicegirl]

this would have got 100k notes as a tumblr post in 2018

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I really hated this girl in my class and we kept exchanging notes with various threats of violence on them but then on a Zoom call I saw that she kept a bunch of them pinned on her wall with little hearts around them and I got the biggest crush on her after that.

[glowingemberz]

Not again. Reread OPs name

[virtualgirladvance]

no shut up let me believe please i need this

[etchif]

I don't like it when people say "if you say you can't cook what you really can't do is read instructions" because that really does not apply to something like cooking where most recipes are filled with instructions like "add a pinch" "boil until done" "cook at medium heat", which are things that require experience to understand correctly

[tpwrtrmnky]

The idea of Mario and Peach having any kind of relationship beyond the occasional kiss on the nose and "mama mia" is like viscerally incomprehensible to me

Not like in a prude way I just can't conceive of Mario experiencing... urges. He's a character outside the scope of that. I'm not saying he's asexual either cause positioning him on the allo/ace spectrum implies that it's a dimension of his character that at least exists, that he has at some point noticed it. I think he just jumps.

[tpwrtrmnky]

Luigi probably fucks though.

[tpwrtrmnky]

#op interrogate yourself about why you think this right fucking now

So unlike Mario, who continues to be essentially a void with no internality, I actually act with thoughts and intent and already did do that when writing this post.

Mario is a mascot of one of the most sanitized corporate brands in existence. He differs from real, full-fledged ace people in that his sexlessness is not queer, not transgressive in any sense of the word, just a void left by his position as a player character. He has no queer identity because he has no identity beyond the fact that it's-a-him, Mario.

[antigyro]

Ok but why is Luigi different

[tpwrtrmnky]

displays internality by being capable of fear. to fear is to have something to lose. and what does he stand to lose? fucking.

[juicetrump2]

Chick-fil-A mounts PR campaign to push back against its anti-LGBTQ+ reputation - LGBTQ Nation

The chicken chain was told to "cluck off" the last time it tried to move into the UK. This time, it hired bigger guns.

[tehjleck]

me: "have they tried not being fucking ignorant religious bigots?"

article: “I suspect that a bit of the steam has gone out of the LGBT thing,” Backman told the right-wing outlet, staying ahead of the issue. “There may be the odd protester, but if they have got armies of PR people laser-focused on that then I suspect it may be OK.”

me: no surprises there... fuck them

sandwich recipe

[warriorsmurf]

We go through a lot of pickles here and this recipe is a good way to use leftover brine.

[jfk-blown-away-blog]

The thing that pisses me off the most though is the fact I know so many LGBTQ+ individuals that still go there, and they are surprised when I actually don't. It's literally like that tweet.

[spirit-of-science]

the lemonade tastes different from normal lemonade because it's made with Meyer lemons! Meyer lemons are a different type of citrus than a lemon!

Image description: screenshot of a Reddit post by Reddit user Addition-849 on r/ChickFilA titled "Actual Lemonade Recipe"

Post reads: "I keep seeing wrong recipes online and so I'm here to set the record straight.

The recipe is a 5:1:1 ratio

5 cups of water, 1 cup of sunkist meyer lemon juice, 1 cup of sugar.

End ID

[themysteriousmurasamecastle]