Dear Ate Aa,
Living my life right now seems to be a difficult task to continue. It seems like my vulnerabilities are increasing and i’m too afraid that it’ll worsen, it’ll be the one that would consume me. I tend to overthink on small and useless things; I stay up late even when I have nothing to do anymore. I easily jump into conclusions that would anytime ruin the friendships that I have or other relationships. I easily get fed up by the things that frustrates me the most and / or even the least. The sweet, loving and thoughtful Ashley became the grown-up Ashley that I didn’t expect. I was the twin that gave every small things meaning and significance, but now I tend to overlook things. This leads me the inability to even deal with myself appropriately. Just like what my father once said to me, “I thought you were the sweet and lovable one, but I was wrong.” Then impinged my self-esteem and my mindset. But all of these, I knew when it started, but is this normal? Is this part of being an adolescent? What should I do to alleviate these vulnerabilities? How can i cope up? Is this real?;
Ashley ____________________________________________________________
I know i’m not the rightful or suitable person to engage these matters but just to accommodate you head on because I FEEL YOUR PAIN & I eagerly wanted to help so here’s the thing: after reading your letter, the implications that I got from those words or even beyond is that, you wanted to neutralize yourself because you’re becoming the worse version of yourself. But here’s the catch, you shouldn’t always put the burden on your side since you have always tried to be the best version that accommodates the expectations of other, but remember you cannot always please others. Apparently, you can just be yourself as long as you lived up your words and actions morally, know yourself first then you understand others. Yes, it is just normal to experience such, but it isn’t normal if you haven’t tried to at least do something to alleviate the pain morally. It’s part of being an adolescent since it is the stage wherein you experience a lot of change.
Moreover, these 3 tips could be the possible commensurate answer for your problems:
1. Remember to always be humble and understand others - you may be thinking that, “why can’t be them that will do the understanding part?”. Yes, that may be a reasonable question to raise. But apparently, what if they can’t? Who will be the one to do it? It is YOU. If you want to help yourself, then you must put the rightful sacrifices even when you think it’s illogical. But remember, know when to your choose your battles. Understanding others will never make you less, it’s even a gate pass towards improvement!
2. Have are reliable and credible person to be your outlet - it sucks to be an over-thinker right? It’s normal to overthink, but never ever let it consume you. You can accept what you feel and what you think, but never be driven by it because it’ll just worsen your development as a person and your relationship with others But, I know you have your parents that will lead you home and to the right path, just don’t be sacred to reach out. They don’t want you to be sad, as much as I don’t want you to give up on life.
3. Approach the person who’ve hurt you / seek answer and help - yes, the main reason why everyone’s in great depression, experiencing existential crisis, or even lose their hopes is because someone’s constantly bothering us. It’s normal wherein you have enemies in life, unless you have live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all in which case you fail by default. Answers may not come that easily, but be patient and always seek for it. After all, maybe it was right under your nose but you’re too paranoid and disturbed to even identify it.
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