Things. Sometimes

don't know what I'm posting. random shit

[kaijuyuri]

i like how all cats regardless of species can either look rlly badass and cool or just incredibly silly stupid

[kaijuyuri]

my proof

[magicratfingers]

me in my brain me in my selfies

[konoko]

[sexting] tell me you won't leave me

[ellewantsrevenge]

aadam jacobs's archive

[fandom-man]

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

this is prime proof that this ENTIRE WEBSITE is autistic because nowhere else would a no tags post that's just an informative list about slang get this much traction.

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

anyway more addittions

“30-50 feral hogs” for someone using Very Specific Scenarios to justify holding back larger policy changes

“what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament” for how do you know that without being a part of it.

“anyone in this thread smoke weed” for the shit you people are saying is so off topic this might as well be a general discussion forum

“dogs are boys and cats are girls” for ooh ur mindset did not grow past 4th grade, huh

“color theory in a childrens hospital” for bending over backwards to not agree that YEA, that thing Came Off Weird

“you are a tar pit” for someone finding any reason to respond with outrage.

“bean soup? im allergic to beans!” for ik this doesn’t work for you, but that’s not a flaw. not everything can be for you.

“people irl: hey man hows it going” for this will Never Matter irl

[sukig2]

I love the headcanon that once back on Erid, Rocky refuses to give up the astrophage solution until his starving dying alien friend is safe.

It's even funnier to think that he never told Grace about this.

Picture this.

Grace, recording a video diary for future human visitors or something:

"Oh boy, and the ERIDIANS are some of the nicest people you'll ever meet! They've done so much for me, I can't even put into words how grateful I am! Once we arrived on Erid, their top priority was saving my life despite the fact that their planet was dying! Me, a stranger, someone who doesn't even belong here! They went above and beyond for me, and all just because they're SUCH amazing, caring people. Right, Rock?"

Rocky, having flashbacks to the time he yelled "STAY THE FUCK BACK, NO YOU CAN'T HAVE THE TAUMOEBA! WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY? ALIEN ISN'T PRIORITY? FUCK YOU! ROCKY WILL KEEP TAUMOEBA FOR HIMSELF! ROCKY WILL BLOW UP ALL OF ERID! ROCKY WILL....":

"....sure."

[bigtittygothmom666]

[thissweetenamor]

omfg pls

[viiollatte]

🎪🎟️Pierrot~🎟️🎪

Voice: Leon 🎪

Excuse my tail, and the audience, this was from a stream 🥺

[nikoriis]

baby

[cerastes]

I wasn't sure about letting this Hydromancer into the party at first, but it turns out her sword arm is unparalleled, and she only dabbled into Hydromancy so she could intentionally contain the enemy's blood after she rained countless slashes upon them like a meteor shower on the clear night sky for the express purpose of striking a pose, muttering "zan", and then releasing all of the blood on their wounds at once in a spectacle that the villager elder described "sick as fuck".

[konoko]

[wakingfromthewater]

This was shared as a "bad" joke but I was so charmed by it I've been thinking about it for days.

[artistic-octopus]

[wordswithkittywitch]

Moose at the next table: No they don't. I've been waiting here for an hour.

[totally-not-an-al1en]

[dragon-in-a-fez]

complimented a cashier on her turtle pin this morning and she said "oh thanks, I am a little bit of a Turtle Person" with the carefully contained energy of Cookie Monster telling you he's mildly fond of chocolate chips

I hope she and the multiple tons of turtle merch she definitely has at home are having a wonderful day

[wtf-drawing]

i love this metaphor so much i drew it

[flying-potato2]

[cupcakeshed]

Wait what the fuck

[prinnay]

sketch

[the-professional-despiser]

[drtanner]

The. The audio. :')

[konoko]