I’m yours—synopsis: Superman fights his feelings for you for as long as he can, even going so far as to vanish from your life until he breaks and can’t stay away from you any longer when you put your life in danger.
paring- Superman x reader
warning: cursing, smut at the end and in the beginning, NSFW, a bit of angst, p in v, reader has a vagina, fingering, unprotected sex, creampie, blood, reader gets hurt, breaking the law, possibly others.
a/n: This got away from me and became longer than what I thought it and the longest I’ve ever written a fic!! But anyways as always I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it
divider credit: @/cursed-camine
Clark’s fingers slid into you like gliding against silk and your hopeless pleading whispers of his name reassured him to continue with his movements. His body involuntarily shivered when you rubbed your thigh between his legs and made the pressure building in his stomach leap to his sensitive groin which twitched at your simple touches, Clark felt like he would burst at any second.
You bit your lip as you came, a piece of you dripping down Clark’s forearm as he felt you tighten around his fingers in pulses and it wasn't long after when you had all of Clark’s own excitement spill into his pants with a low groan, wetting your leg and the bedsheets below.
Clark shoots up in his bed with a crinkle of confusion in his brow and disappointment in his downturned lips at the realization it was another dream. A very lude and hot sex dream.
He cringed to himself in the dark of his room filled with nothing but his loneliness, mortification and still an ache in his britches as they began to tighten at the addition to another hardon. He shamefully thanked whomever may be listening that he no longer had a nosy roommate and could take care of the wet problem in his sweats discreetly.
Clark could count the number of times he has had a sex dream about you, using both hands and all ten fingers. He first saw you in an article his coworker had written, discarded on the edge of their desk. You were disheveled, your clothes were dingy, a part of your mask was torn and you were on a dirty rooftop after having robbed a rich man's house in the dead of night, the cops weren't able to catch up to you.
He caught you red handed one night, hovering above you as a stolen sack of jewels slung over your shoulder. He thought himself to be prepared for whatever stunt you might pull to escape but you just stood there, your nose scrunched in disdain and your eyes narrowed at him, clearly upset at being caught but all Clark could think was how precious you looked and before Clark could even say anything you apologized to him, pleading you would never steal again.
Clark thought it was the oddest thing but what else was he supposed to do besides believe you and let you go with a warning? Arrest you? You gave back the jewelry and ma didn't raise him to outright call women liars.
Clark was a little hurt when he found you the next night, fleeing from a crime scene you left behind, he hoped it didn't show on his face. You looked at him in a way that showed you were unashamed for what you just did.
“You going to arrest me tonight big blue?”
“I should” he crossed his arms against his chest, descending from the sky as he spoke “it’s almost like you think breaking the law is funny” you feign hurt and place your hand over your chest.
“Who me? I would never but if I’m not mistaken I’m not the one who let me go last time we saw each other”
“Whatever you want to call it. You shouldn't be too trusting of no good criminals like me”
“I won’t make that mistake again” Superman’s feet touched the ground and you backed away slowly, intent on fleeting if he stepped closer.
“Dont you have more important things to worry about?” you ask
“Like stopping a monitor from hitting the earth or something”
“I am useful for more things than just that”
“Should I start calling you Batman now?”
“Are you trying to be a certain someone in Gotham with that cosplay?” you shrug
“If I wasn’t mistaken I’d think you are flirting, don’t want to lock me away with all the bad men in Arkham?” you smile. “Though you should know this whole theme was mine first. That cat totally stole my whole look”
“I hate to be the one to tell you this but that's what thieves do” you cross your arms, mimicking him.
“And I hate to be the one to tell you this but you could be doing a whole lot more than talking to me though I am flattered”
“Do you have anything off the top of your head?” Superman says sarcastically and you put a hand on you chin, pretending to think.
“How about arresting those who are actually hurting this city”
“You don’t think stealing hurts Mitropolose?” You lift your head, sticking your nose in the air
“You think you are different, don’t you?”
“No, just better and take my word for it or don’t, the people who are endangering Mitropolose are way above your pay grade” Superman finally takes a step towards you and you almost feel panicked but he makes no other move towards you
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about you and the cops trying to catch me, you notice how the news has only been about me lately? Not the cartel that’s smuggling dangerous merchandise into this city. I’m talking about people who have enough influence to pay off the cops and everyone below them.”
“What?” Superman’s brows crinkle
“Don’t you have super hearing?”
“I do and would know if something like that was happening in this city”
“Ok” you shrug again, playing along and you can see Superman thinking before turning his attention back to you.
“You know more about them?”
“More than you” he walks up to you and you stumble back wearily, not sure about his next move.
“You’re the man of steel and you need help with some thugs?”
“You said it yourself, they’re getting past me” you scoff “I’m not asking you to risk your life, I just need information and I can handle the rest” you look away, tapping your foot on the ground and weighing your pros and cons.
“You know, you’re too loud” Superman hums in question “the symbol of hope is too loud, these guys know how to operate under you because you’re up in the clouds, wherever you are there is always a camera”
“Does this mean you will help me?”
“I never said that” you point a finger at him “but if I were to, you would owe me a—no two favors spaceboy, whatever I want” Superman nods his head slowly
“The first one is you can’t arrest me, not for this anyway or anything in the past”
“As long as you keep your claws to yourself, the second?” You hum
“I’ll cash that in some other time” You smile before holding out your hand. Superman bringing his own hand to yours and shaking gently.
Superman clears his throat as you walk away and your head tilts in confusion. You note the man's still stretched out hand, preparing to take your bag of stolen goods. You begrudgingly hand it over to him, cursing him out in your head.
One night, you call out to him. Your voice coming in a whisper in the night for Superman. Before then, it had been a whole three weeks since making that deal with you.
Your call to him wasn’t one of panic but nevertheless Superman flew in at an alarming speed. When he flew down, feet hitting the ground softly as he walked up to you, you stood with your hands on your hips looking rather impatiently at him.
His own pleasantness upon seeing you was washed away when you gestured with your hand to the black farrier parked a few feet behind you.
“I..what is this?” superman stuttered out
“You asked me for help on that thing, remember?”
“You got me a car?” he asks, tilting his head and you suppressed a smile at the assumption
“No” You walked over to said car with superman following after “i got you a guy” opening the trunk of the car to reveal a man, bound by rope and still unconscious from the hit he took from your boot.
“Please tell me that is not a civilian” you shake your head at the little faith he had in you
“Of course not. He’s the guy that was in charge of shipping the illegal weaponry tonight, turns out the crime ring was larger than I thought, the people I've been stealing from are the ones who have been funding the shipments,
“That’s why you stole from them?”
“Not at all, they’re totally loaded and wouldn’t miss a few things off the top”
“That was dangerous, I didn’t ask you to do this and I sure didn't want you putting your life in danger” you respond by placing your index on the yellow ‘S’ on his suit and superman follows your hand.
“So you don't want my help anymore?”
“No I…thats not what I’m saying”
“Then what are you saying?”
“I’m saying thank you but—”
“You’re welcome” you cut him off and Superman has to take a second to force himself to breathe, his throat suddenly becoming tight at you close proximity.
“Next time let me handle the dangerous side of this job. Are you still keeping your part of the deal? No stealing?”
“I’m a little offended, scouts honor spaceboy” A grin springing across your face “you know you still owe me that favor" superman nods.
“Then I still have to think about it, just make sure you don't forget you owe me” you step away and superman feels like he can breathe fully now. “The next time we meet let's try to do it in a place that's nicer than a shipping doc”
From then on an unspoken rule was made between the two of you. You would give him any information that was happening under the radar, out of harm's way of course. It was simple.
Being with you was simple for Clark, easy and he didn’t have to think, he just ‘did.’ Clark knew he wanted to do more—so much more with you— he couldn’t help but think about it every time he looked at you with those unmistakably blue eyes of his.
Clark realized something one night as he held you close, wanting to do more but couldn’t. Not because he was afraid of rejection but you didn’t know him: normal farm boy Clark Kent with a reporter’s day and he couldn’t very well tell you the truth. You knew him as Superman, the man of steel and he couldn’t just have sex with you, he respected you too much for you to be dumbed down to a nice fuck and dating you was out of the question, it wouldn’t be fair to you to have a relationship built on the world's biggest secret. Clark was being selfish thinking he could have something else.
He felt his only option as Superman was to disappear, leave you alone and hope you understood his decisions but it didn’t stop him from feeling guilty, he wasn’t just vanishing, he was abandoning you.
Clark drops the towel on his head, hot water dripping from every inch of his body and to the floor. He sighs in relief, his second erection long gone and the built up tension along with it, though a pit formed in his stomach.
He still felt so wrong, still felt guilty about the way he left things with you. It made his stomach turn and appetite leave and with the way he still thought about you endlessly in the most vulnerable states of undress, it was almost torture.
Hot tea splashed from side to side in the old coffee mug as Clark poured the blue liquid into the glass and walked to the kitchen island where his earlier discarded computer still stays open, ready for Clark to finish his work. He was fully dressed and dried off now and he could really use a distraction so he pops open his computer a second later and takes a seat. To his dissatisfaction, he wasn’t able to focus for one second. Typos, zoning out, jotting down the wrong information, too much brain fog.
It’s about half an hour later when Clark’s resolve breaks in two—his focus while doing his work being suffocated by thoughts of you and he finds it hard to concentrate on anything other than that—with a rough sigh he allows himself to listen to you if only to bring ease to his mind. He doesn’t hear much at first, a conversation and one you don’t seem very fond of. It’s not until your heart spikes and your breath becomes sort of rigid that Clark feels slightly panic on your behalf.
He knows it’s not any of his business and he doesn’t even know what’s going on but Clark can’t help himself when he makes his way to you, his suit already on and an ‘S’ on his chest.
It doesn’t take him long to get to your location and when he arrives he doesn’t make himself known, thinking it best not to as he spies from one of the windows, letting the scenery below him play out on its own.
He spots you in a second, you standing stiff with an expression he can’t read landing on your face and a man standing across you laughs, your poker face faintly droops as your heart hammers in your chest.
One of the men reaches behind his back and Clark is ready to pounce if given the reason to but he pulls out an envelope and Clark visibly relaxes.
“There’s just one more thing” the man says as you reach for the envelope, not looking to pleased when he pulls back
“A few of my guys were busted last week, got anything to do with that?”
“That had nothing to do with me”
“Then why do you look so scared”
“Because being around you isn’t exactly sunshine and rainbows, I mean you brought me to a dusty warehouse and your guys are staring at me like I’m some hog. But yeah it’s a real nice welcome” the man smiles and after handing you the envelope you're soon on your way and he makes a whistling sound you try to ignore.
“The thing is” the man clears his throat cocking his head “I don’t fucking believe you”
Your breath stops, it feels like time does the same as the man pulls a gun from his holster and points it directly at you. In a mere moment a single clap sounding similar to thunder bursts through the warehouse, shattering the glass and creating cracks in the walls.
Broken glass echoes throughout the warehouse as it quickly falls to the floor in a high-pitch clatter, everyone in the room stands on high end and in a second every gun in the room is on a bulletproof Superman, a single gun still on the not so bulletproof you.
You take the distraction and shrink behind a crate, the cover offering little comfort from the heavy rain of fire that erupts as several bullets narrowly miss you. Every gun in the room aiming to kill.
You cover your head as debris flies through the air and you open your eyes just in time to see a man looming over you, the barrow of his gun glaring you in the eyes. You wonder if this might be where you die and in the moment it seems every detail is magnified. You can hear the man cock the pistol, see his finger squeeze the trigger and the gun go off.
Then, a red cap covers your view of the man and you can hear the sound of the bullet clinking against the floor as it's crushed against Superman’s chest. You don't see the rest of what happens but when superman turns around, the man is already unconscious and on the ground.
Superman offers his hand to you and after you shake from your daze, you ignore it and stand on your own.
“I heard you. That’s why I came, I wanted to make sure you were ok” Superman explains. Your breadth steadies and you shake your head at the man
“I didn’t ask for your help”
“I know, but I’m glad I came and I’m sure you are too”
“You came, you saved the night, now you can go” you brush past him, feeling a mild sting in your leg.
“Hold on” Superman calls, trailing after you like a small duckling “are you alright? How did you end up here? Who wer—”
“Enough with the questions, you’re not needed here anymore. I’m sure there’s some cat stuck in a tree so go do that instead” you dig in your pocket as you step outside, looking for your keys and leaning against your car as the pain in your leg grows.
“You’re still shaken up I get that but” Superman stands behind you, hands on his hips “do you want to tell me what that was about?”
“We haven’t talked in almost three months” you say looking at him “and that’s your question?”
“Too busy to say hi or leave a note saying ‘hey I didn’t forget about you?”
“Bullshit, if you wanted to you would have” Superman avoids your boring gaze. You shift uncomfortably and the small groan that leaves your throat doesn’t go unnoticed by Superman.
“I’m fine” you sit in the driver's seat, starting up the car.
“At least let me see, it could be serious” you take a beat of silence before lifting up your pant leg, blood dripping down to your ankle in a steady stream. Superman dips down immediately, taking off his cape and wrapping in snugly around your calf to stop the bleeding and put pressure on the wound. “You might need stitches, I could take you to the hospital—”
“No, no hospitals. They ask too many questions, besides I don’t need you taking me anywhere. I can drive myself”
“It looks like you have a flat tire” Superman says, gesturing to your car with a tilt of his chin. Your head hits the steering wheel upon seeing the damage, a small curse slipping from your tongue. Likely caused by a ricocheting bullet. “I can drop you off at home.” You give a small head nod after a moment.
Superman helps you out of your car and cups your legs and back, lifting you out of the car with ease. Reluctantly you wrap your arms around his shoulders when he tells you to hang on.
You arrive at the small corner where your apartment building is tucked away and open the window, climbing through the fire escape and Superman gives a once over glance to make sure no prying eyes see him entering your apartment.
“First aid kit?” Superman asks after he locks the window once inside. You point to your bathroom and plop down on your couch. Soon Superman walks over, first aid kit in hand.
He kneels in front of you and you place a hand over his to stop him from opening the kit.
“I know” he looks at you, from his position on the floor you are now eye level with him “but let me do it anyway” and somehow his blue eyes convince you to surrender and you lean back, allowing him to place your foot on his knee.
Superman diligently unwraps his cape from around your leg. “The bleeding has stopped” he remarks.
Avoiding him you clinch your fist, determined not to let out a single voice of pain “do you do this a lot?” you ask, bouncing your other leg.
“Not really. You can imagine I don't get hurt often” Superman dabs some of the disinfectant on a cotton pad “but i have seen leaguers do it enough times”
“Not sure if that's a good thing or bad”
“...Being who we are has its ups and downs” Superman hums
“You mean being a hero” he nods once and tells you it may sting before placing the pad on your wound “what are the upsides?”
“You get to save people, everyday you get to make sure a life doesn’t end”
“We can’t save everyone…” Superman finishes cleaning the dried blood from your skin “and we have to sacrifice certain things from our lives. Family, friends…”
“Being a part of a team means being apart of something bigger than yourself. If someone knew the identity of one of us, it could put the rest a risk”
“So what? You just lie to everyone?”
“That or we make the choice to leave” once finished, he wraps your leg in a gauze roll and sets your foot down.
“That's why you left me on the roof that night?” you scoff out of disdain “because we were friends?”
“You know why” Superman holds your eyes, trying to communicate his unspoken words.
“For fucks sake I’m not asking for a riddle to solve, I want a direct answer”
“I care about you but–” he pulls his touch from you “I can't have a relationship built on a lie, that's not fair to you or me”
“Im not asking you to tell me your identity”
“What kind of life would that be for you? Me coming to you at some insane hour of the night. Only being able to spend a few hours with you before the sun rises and I have to leave you behind again, not being able to go on dates during the day or night. We would have to keep everything about the way I feel about you a secret, it would be a lie and I can't live like that. I wouldn’t make you live like that either”
You frown at Superman's words wanting to look away from his eyes that drown in so much emotion but you can't find yourself to break the only contact you have with him in this moment.
“Why do you have to think about the future? Why can't you just stay here with me in this time? In the present” you plea and superman shakes his head as you cup his face in your palms.
You move to the edge of the couch and Superman closes his eyes, not being able to look at the pained expression on your face any longer. “Please” you press your lips to his in a gentle peck and superman opens his eyes. You expect him to pull away, take back his words and say he feels nothing for you. But he does none of those things, instead he brings his hand over your own and presses it closer to his face.
In a moment he leans forward and presses his lips against your own. You reciprocate his touch immediately. He’s kissing you hard and with so much conviction he is afraid you will suffocate from it. He doesn't let you though, pulling away for a mere second to let you breathe before kissing you again and his resolve is completely crumbled to nothingness. You encourage him to lean closer with a tug on his shoulder and the kiss depends once he's sure you don't want this to end.
Superman pulls away again and you show your dismay with a light tug on his hair. He leans his head against yours
“Stay the night” you say as the thought he might leave stains your mind and he shakes his head because you both know what you mean by those three words.
“I can’t” superman leans away to get a better look at you “I want to but I can’t”
“You're hurt” his brows dip down.
“No” you shake your head “you wont hurt me. I trust you just don't leave me again”
Superman won't be able to bear the look on your face when he tells you he needs to leave. So he doesn't. Instead he carefully slides one arm under your thighs and lifts you cleanly off the couch, your body tipping instinctively towards him as he carries you with one arm. His free hand opening your bedroom door.
Superman places you on the bed before standing back up and taking off his clothes, removing one item at a time as if he was putting on a show just for you, for your eyes only but he was still unsure about continuing until you grab him by the hips, pulling him closer to you and reassuring him.
You wanted to ruin him for anyone else tonight, you wanted to be the only one to be able to relieve the need in his boxers that you now discard to the floor and you lean back as he climbs over you.
Superman kisses the corner of your month, hot and wet before doing the same to your chin, your neck, your collar bone and he takes off your top, revealing your naked chest for him to stare as longingly as he wants. You nudge your knee on the back of his thigh to silently tell him you're impatient and a little chuckle escapes him.
“Can I eat you out?” You shake your head and a cute frown appears on Superman’s face.
“Not tonight but if you deserve it and stay” you press your lips against his “you can in the morning”
Superman grabs a pillow to place it under your hurt leg for rest and slides lower on the bed, coming face to face with your stomach and he kisses it softly causing you to squirm at the ticklish sensation. It was then when he pulls off your bottoms, paying extra attention to not hurt your leg then doing the same with your underwear.
“I wish I had my camera” superman said through a sigh, panning his eyes over you.
“So I can take a picture of you” he smiles and kisses you again before dipping down and kissing your clit and relishing in the pleasant high hum you give him. He slides his thumb down your clit and to your hole and back up, pressing his finger gently against the sensitive jewel.
After repeating the motion he finally slips a finger inside you, already beginning to stretch you open. He moans as you rub the ball of your foot against his dick and the precum that slips from him wettens his stomach. You want to be mean, tell him he has to get off on your foot but you would be punishing yourself as well and you grow impatient with every second you hear him whimper just from grinding on your heel.
A moan builds in your throat and slips out when superman pushes another finger inside and you paw at his shoulder to pull him away. He stops moving and looks at you, waiting for you to tell him what to do.
“I want to feel you right now”
“But I’m…big and I don't think–”
“I can handle it. I dont want to cum if its not with you inside me” his breath speeds up in anticipation as he nods, getting up and angling his body above yours.
You nod your head “come in me” you say. You lift yourself with your arms around Superman's neck and kiss him. He hesitantly places himself at your entrance and glides his penis tip up and down your opening with zeal. Several minutes later he sinks his tip in, waiting for you to tell him it's ok to continue before pushing the rest of himself in as deep as he could possibly go and your light breaths of pleasure are replaced with a sharp keen hum.
Superman pays close mind to your expressions as best he could through his own delight at being inside you. Both his and your faces contorting in such a way it would be concerning if they were under any other circumstances. Your lips parted, opening wide like you were going to sing him a song of pleasure, coming out in a silent howl. Superman's head tilted back as he moved in and out of you, picking up a pace that has the headboard slamming against the wall.
You clam down on him like you didn't want him to leave and he moaned in response, drawn out by his hips slapping against yours repetitively. Your bedroom became a tunnel, sounds echoing off the walls and covering any other noise that wasn't you and the man above you.
Superman didn't want to leave the tunnel but he could feel your climax approaching and he almost stopped right then and there as for all this not to end but Superman wouldn't be so selfish and deny you the pleasure of cuming. So he steaded his pace and placed a hand under your rear and lifted you up so he could hit deeper than before.
The sounds that came out of you became louder, more excited and intense like a great wind breathing out a profound and sensory moan. You met with his speed and force and superman could feel your inner walls so intensely, like all your curves became heightened and he got bigger. You could feel the wet and hot light at the end of the tunnel and you ran to it like it was a life line and you needed to catch the white strings of satisfaction to survive.
“I—ah—I’m cumming, I’m gonna cum”
“C-cum in me. Pleasepleaseplease” you plead and he doesn’t have time to ask if you are sure because the two of you do just that a second later, first you and then superman moments behind you, an indescribable thrill filling him as he empties inside of you and a small whimper leaves his lips as he finishes, voice joining yours in one terrifyingly, hopeless cry.
Superman holds himself up, hovering above you as the two of you come down from your shared high, breaths mixing together before calming down. Neither of you say a thing, just laying in silence, knowing it’s going to end, it's bound to. Superman begrudgingly lifts up his head, looking at you and he's surprised to see your eyes with unspilled tears filling them.
“Stay tonight” you say “that’s my favor.” He wipes the single tear that slips down your cheek before kissing it. Once, then the other side.
