Dottore

Get your bleeding from the doctor! Leeches are the hottest thing right now! Here to offer you the latest in Renaissance medicine. (Don't listen to him he will kill you) *((I am not an actual doctor, real medical inquiries should be answered through an actual WebMD or hell even your own real doctor))*

[bobbit-r]

them…..

without sparkle + with background under the cut!!

Keep reading

[thyrell]

i think yall are just pretending to have an excess of black bile so the doctors will give you more leeches

[indoorcoyote]

leeches are for treating an excess of blood. an excess of black bile is treated with mercury-based laxatives. smfh

[thyrell]

are you questioning my craft

[indoorcoyote]

yes, i am. everyone knows imbalances of different humours are solved with different treatments. leeches for blood, laxatives for black bile, emetics for yellow bile, apophlegmatisms for phlegm. it’s simple and honestly i’m ashamed that you’re disseminating misinformation like this

[trashboat]

where do barbiturates fit into all this

[troutpopulation]

This is available on my redbubble store!

And the clean version!

DO NOT REMOVE MY CAPTION.

[askadoctor]

I heard there was a pandemic going around! So I’d thought I’d share some helpful tips as a plague expert! 

1. Balance Humors 

2. Wear Dead Frod 

3. Get Stylish Mask

4. And remember...Resource hoarders get the guillotine! (requiscat in pace!) and thank you Carnefice! 

[plaguedoctormemes]

If i made and showed some silly plague doctor art would yall like it..............

[plaguedoctormemes]

I come bearing a gift..........

[dezmondmyles]

@bossyspooky

[worstdoctorsyndrome]

[bossykiwi]

What did you do last New Year’s Eve?

For most, probably something boring. 

But you don’t have to let it be boring. Come to my party! 

Roarin’ 2020.  Not just a 20s themed NYE Party. A fully immersive experience. We got magicians, we got drag queens, we got live music, we got mermaids and food and a cash bar. We even got a Casino Night (whose proceeds go to Make-A-Wish of Greater Los Angeles). You could win a cave kayak tour! You could Besame Cosmetics! That’s not enough? We have a heated pool, jacuzzi AND SAUNA. Into art? We got an Art and Poetry Speakeasy Upstairs featuring local artists from around LA. Yes, that’s right, A’leila Walker style up in this bitch. 

Not 21? No problem. 

Not over 18? No problem, just bring an adult with you. 

Find my impersonation of a used car salesman annoying? Good, so do I. Stop reading this and plan your New Year’s. 

[whwhebtjsjentvtvg-deactivated20]

straight friend groups be like: *blonde girl* *chad* *the funny one* *kyle* *brunette girl* *frat boy*

gay friend groups be like: *the crusader* *the highwayman* *the graverobber* *the jester* *the plague doctor*

[v9mp1re]

[irlmicolash]

you: hey

me: *turns around and accidentally hits you with my comically long plague doctor mask* what

[irlmicolash]

every time the camera turns to me, my plague doctor mask has gotten longer

[qotd-by-me]

"oh no the plague doctor is hot"

—me

[my-commc]

[squeakitties]

[moon-princess-in-wonderland-dea]

😂🤣😂

Christ on a cracker...

TAKE ME, PLAGUE DADDY!

[yersinia-pests]

he cant read but is that gonna stop him from being the best doctor in town? Yes. It probably will. Not like there’s anyone better around anymore.

[yersinia-pests]

Have you ever wanted to show off your LGBT pride AND your plague doctor pride with one convenient design? Well you’re in luck, I dusted off my old redbubble and now I’ve got a whole parade of pride plague doctors available for purchase right here! 

And if youre missing your pride flag, feel free to contact me! Ill see what i can do!

[ratwarlock]

Sorry babe, during sex, the plague mask stays ON

[searchforinnerpeach-deactivated]

My mask has the biggest beak. And it's filled with the finest spices and aromatics. Juniper, mint, rose petals, cloves, laudanum, you name it and I have it. My overcoat is perfectly waxed to keep the plague flesh off of me. My cane is the perfect length to examine patients. My medical encyclopedias are among the largest and most difficult to read. I've trained bloodletting in Naples and I have witnessed an exorcism in Rome. Anyway, you have demons in your blood.

This is by far the most sensual ask I’ve ever received

[seltzerluvr69]

@bossykiwi swoon