[dat-soldier]

excellent work, 47. you have peed all the pee from your penis

[fiore-firelily]

while I am talking to you about something gay and stupid a mosquito lands on my arm and sucks all my blood out in an instant, swelling to the size of a person as my remains flutter cartoonishly down to the ground, and it continues the conversation where I left off in a high pitched approximation of my voice

[as-old-roads]

does your pet give a fuck when you get home

my pet gives too much of a fuck, we have to manage it

my pet *really* gives a fuck, but it's not really a problem

my pet is chill about it, my pet says sup like a roommate

my pet does not give a care!

nuance button

no pets

Voting ended onMay 19

u simply must pick one pet to answer for and elaborate in reblogs if u wish. my cats both care way more than audrey when im back lol she wags her tail and might want to get kinda silly but sometimes doesn't even bother leaving her (open) crate to say hey

[skunkbear]

This is one slice of an incredible high resolution, enhanced color image of Pluto, recently released by NASA. You can see the full, larger version here. 

Credit: NASA/JHUAPL/SwRI

[offshoreoilrig]

You need to touch saltwater

[stark1lling]

This image would be so joyous and whimsical but unfortunately it’s exclusively used to discount pro wasp arguments, she could be playing coolmathgames instead and having #somuchfun

[deepinourengines]

i need a polycule of tall skinny white guys preferably like around 10 of them so i can dress them up in nice outfits and give them cute little red ribbon chokers. (hiding a bowling ball behind my back) For no real reason

[kasaneteto]

im getting really fucking sick of all this “it gets better!” bullshit. im going to have depression for the rest of my life. it’s not going to “””get better””” fuck you

[kasaneteto]

i have really great news guys, despite it all

[scootsyboots]

[kosmogrl]

girl whatevering my way through life

[dumbpuppyfag]

it's so fucked up that quentin tarantino got to be the guy who made all the quentin tarantino films

[digitaldeathx-deactivated202605]

self-awareness check, list five things you like that aren't media pieces in the tags now ‼️

[absterstuff]

new jerma clip of all time just dropped

[maplebunie]

my can of

[child-of-asbestos-deactivated20]

this is such a desolate image i love it

[podcastwizard]

literally drinking a beer by the lake and still opened tumblr. some of us are beyond saving

[electronicmail]

what i like about airports is that once youre in there theres no going back. I mean youre there until they let you out

[electronicmail]

im no longer responsible for myself. I am free because i am contained. oooh eighteen dollar sandwich dont mind if i do

[coast-modern]

I was 12 years old in 2011.... you could NEVER make me hate stomp clap hey music

[coast-modern]

How it feels to be 10 years old and hear Little Lion Man for the first time

[chaldrias]

What's really killing me about this Charlie Kirk situation is apparently a bunch of people online were joking about the shooter being an old white guy because some grandpa in the crowd Kirk was speaking to yelled out "And I'd do it again" moments after Kirk got his neck popped but apparently the actual shooter, who we know literally nothing about, was on of the rooftops nearby, and while the police took the time to tie gramps up, the actual shooter basically disappeared into the wind and right now we basically have zero evidence who he was or why he did it. This old man really just took one for the team and let the shooter escape for no reason.

[sjweminem]

i can't not fuck him