TRUSSSS MI DADDI

Lily-16 // CA

[cantbae]

[brimalandro]

happy 35th beyoncé, here are some of my favorite pictures of you I had to crop people out of <3

[notreallysecrets]

I always think it’s weird when people are embarrassed by baby pictures 

being all oh no my mom’s bringing out my baby pics this is the worst 

but I’m like I peaked as a baby. that was my cutest self. I’m never gonna top that let’s only look at baby pictures for the rest of my life please

[nastty]

! Naomi @ Versace, 1999

[pinatasmashing-blog-deactivated]

Misaki Kawai.

[rumineely]

[fhawne-deactivated20221006]

[sjp]

list of things she did: 1. that

[sridevi]

she really did!

[doughnutcrow]

FUCKING GOOD

[pedantic-pepperoni-deactivated2]

look at him throw it back as if he’s not the arsehole in this situation…?

[misscherrylikesthediscourse]

I really hope she didn’t get fired for this cause he deserved that and more.

[memegod]

[fuckboysecurityllc]

Ain’t no law in space boi

[sofiajonze-blog]

a guy walked into the board room and said

“hi sweetheart if you could fix me up a coffee real quick im meeting with the regional reports manager in like five minutes, thanks darling”

and i just stared at him and coldly said

“i am the regional reports manager”

we are now twenty minutes into this board meeting and i dont think i’ve ever seen a man look so embarrassed and afraid in my whole life

[heydr-k]

Good

[thexfiles]

interested to see how 2016 will get worse from here

[thexfiles]

well folks let me just say

[aubreyzayn]

Stop me if you've heard this one before/that time I had to explain Jesus to a six-year-old I was babysitting

*walking past a church*

Child: *points at a large wooden crucifix replica out front* who is that?

Me: uh, that's...Jesus...

Child: who is he?

Me: well, in the Christian religion he is regarded as the son of God

Child: is he real?

Me: *internally screaming FUUUUUUCCCKKKK* um, that's a good question. Evidence suggests there was in fact a historical personage who once lived and that we now know as Jesus. How closely his life resembled the events written in the bible is somewhat unknown, and largely a matter of belief, I suppose, although what isn't, really?

Child: *long pause* okay.

Child: *points at the statue again* Is he real?

Me: oh. OHH. You mean like, is that a real body???

Child: yes

Me: Oh good god Tyler, no, I think it's wood

[onlytwitterpics]

[illinicoise]

[cybersupport]

me, unknowingly layin on my tv remote: oh fucc we got ghosts

[ijayt205]

[staggot]

im having an aneurysm 

[myulteriormotive-deactivated201]

Bernie is the president we need and deserve

[anddshelaughs]

Most politicians fly coach but I get your point.

[sonoanthony]

[parallax-priest]

THE LAST ONE I AM LAUGHING