pairing: bucky barnes x reader
description: bucky is acting...weird with you. more distant, less affectionate, and definitely not normal. but why?
warnings: language, some angst if you squint, mention of a spoiler for episode 6 of TFATWS
a/n: ....i’m back??? i know i know i know it’s LITERALLY been almost 3 years since i’ve last posted an imagine...after i finish writing this i’ll be posting a quick update post, but just know i’m back in some form/fashion! thanks to everyone who’s still here!
“Bucky?” you call out, closing the front door to your shared apartment. You just got done shopping for groceries, and you set your bags down on the kitchen counter before realizing that you still haven’t gotten a response from your boyfriend.
“James?” you try this time, thinking maybe he didn’t hear you before. “You here?” A lack of response for the second time makes you frown and pull your phone out of your pocket. Maybe he went somewhere and texted me about it, you think, but there weren’t any new messages from him. You’re confused now, and you dial his number quickly before bringing the phone to your ear.
As the phone is ringing and you’re waiting for Bucky to pick up, you start putting your groceries away. You pause what you’re doing though, when Bucky doesn’t pick up and you’re directed to leave a voicemail.
“Hey! It’s Bucky. I can’t come to the phone right now for whatever reason, but leave a message and I’ll-”
You hang up before the message finishes, and decide to call Sam instead. Unlike Bucky, Sam picks up after only 3 rings.
“Hey, Y/N! What’s up?” his happy voice rings through your phone, and you smile despite your confusion as to Bucky’s whereabouts.
“Hey, Sam. Just a quick question for you: have you heard from Bucky recently? I came home and he wasn’t here, so I was just wondering if you’d seen him or anything like that...” you trail off at the end, hoping you didn’t sound like an obsessive girlfriend. You add, “I tried calling him, but I got sent to voicemail.”
There was silence on Sam’s end for a moment or two, and you were about to ask if he’d heard your question until he says, “Hey Buck, your girlfriend’s on the phone for you.”
He’s with Sam? you think. Why didn’t he pick up his phone then?
There’s some rustling in the background on Sam’s end of the line, and Bucky finally says, “Hey doll, what’s goin’ on?”
“Hey!” you exclaim, trying to sound perky and not let the confusion you’re feeling seep into your voice. “I tried calling you but you didn’t answer...is everything okay?”
“Yeah yeah yeah!” Bucky assures you. “I’m just hanging with Sam talking about...some things...but I was planning on leaving soon. You need me to leave now?”
You smile as you realize that you were worried over nothing. “No, it’s okay! Have fun with Sam. I just got home with groceries, so I’ll make something for dinner and you can just reheat it if you’re not home soon enough to eat it fresh.”
“Sounds good, doll,” you can hear Bucky’s smile through the phone, and your heart flutters a bit. The two of you have been together for almost two years now, but he still has this effect on you that you can’t quite explain. “I’ll see you in a bit.”
“Alright babe, I love you,” you try to tell him, but you can hear the TV in the background so you know that Bucky’s already pulled the phone away from his ear.
You’re about to end the call, but before you do, you hear Sam say, “Have you told Y/N that-” Bucky ends the call before you catch anything else Sam was saying.
Has he told me what? you wonder internally, taking the phone away from your ear and squinting at it. You decide not to ponder too hard on it, instead putting your effort into making a meal that Bucky would enjoy once he made his way home.
However, dinner comes and goes, and Bucky still doesn’t show. You don’t worry too much, though, since you told him to have fun and that he could reheat whatever you made for dinner. You do start to worry when 11:30 rolls around and he’s still not home.
You’ve already showered and changed into your pajamas for the night, so you shoot Bucky a quick text telling him you’re about to go to bed before tucking yourself in and attempting to get some sleep without him.
When you open your eyes again, it’s to your alarm going off the next morning. You reach over to your nightstand and turn off your alarm before turning back over to say good morning to Bucky and ask about his night. Your confusion grows even more, though, when he’s still no where to be found.
You throw the covers off your body and unplug your phone, getting ready to call him to see if he’d ended up spending the night at Sam’s. You start walking towards the kitchen, and you pause when you notice Bucky asleep on the couch.
“Bucky!” you say loudly to wake him up. He startles awake, and you feel bad for waking him so harshly. He gives you a small smile before you ask, “What happened last night?”
His smile falls again as he closes his eyes and rubs his hands over his eyes. “I...had a few drinks at Sam’s, he drove me home, and I slept on the couch so I didn’t wake you,” he explains, standing up and walking over to you. “And so I didn’t try to sleep with you,” he winks as he wraps his arms around your waist to give you a hug.
You begin to reciprocate his affections, but pause when you realize something. Bucky has never - not even once - chosen to sleep on the couch instead of sleeping in your bed. Even after the two of you got in an argument, even if one of you was sick, even if one of you was blackout drunk...you’d sleep in the same bed and deal with the consequences of the morning together.
Bucky notices your hesitation, and he pulls away from you and gives you a confused look. You turn around and head towards the kitchen, though, not interested in having this conversation now. You had to get ready for work.
“Well, how was Sam’s?” you ask instead. “What did you talk about that whole time?”
“Oh, ya know,” Bucky answers. “Everything, really. Possible missions, Captain America stuff...nothing important.”
“Nothing important,” you repeat, humming to yourself, not missing the way he almost sounded nervous to be answering your question. “Well, I hope it was fun,” you decide on saying, allowing a hint of irritation to make its way into your voice. You poured a to-go cup of coffee and walked back towards your room to get dressed.
“Hold on,” Bucky frowned. He followed you to your room, standing in the doorway as you got dressed for work. “Did I do something wrong?”
You chuckled to yourself while trying to decide how to respond to him. You don’t know exactly what Bucky did that was wrong, but something felt off, and you weren’t sure how to explain that to him. “It’s just....it’s just weird that you didn’t answer my call last night, didn’t come home until late without telling me, didn’t sleep in our bed, and then you seem nervous to tell me how the night went.” As you talked out loud, everything sounded a bit ridiculous, and you were scared you were overreacting. However, you knew how Bucky usually acts, and this wasn’t it.
Bucky didn’t say anything for a minute or two, and you were about to take his silence as a cue for you to leave, until he said, “Well, I’m sorry I’m not acting how you’d expect me to.”
“Oh my god,” you immediately scoff, whipping around to face him. Your eyes were wide in disbelief as you continued, “Are you serious? I know you Bucky. I’m not expecting you to act any way - I just know how you do act. And you’re acting really weird right now.” Bucky tried to object to this, but you cut him off: “No no no, don’t even try to deny it. You’re acting weird and I want to know why.”
“You wanna know why?” Bucky raised his voice at you, and you took a small step back. He noticed your reaction and his eyes softened a bit before he continued, “This is why.” He set a small object on your dresser, then turned around and walked out of the room.
You hurried over to the dresser to see what he’d left there, and your heart dropped to your stomach when you saw it:
“Wait!” you shouted after Bucky, suddenly feeling terrible for questioning his actions. You heard the front door slam, though, and you realized that he’d left the apartment. Tears sprung to your eyes, but you quickly looked up and tried to blink them away. You still have to go to work, you reminded yourself.
Feeling almost numb, you grabbed your things for work and walked out the front door. This was gonna feel like a long day...
You were right in thinking that the day would seem to go on forever. The entire time, you could barely focus on your work as you instead thought about how long Bucky has been thinking of proposing to you. The two of you had talked about marriage a few times, but he never seemed ready to make that step. You respected that, but then you’d never expected him to propose so soon. What were you supposed to think when he was acting all...weird?
You shot a few texts Bucky’s way to try to apologize for blowing up on him, but you didn’t get any response. You didn’t blame him, but now, you were dreading going home and having what you thought was going to be a difficult conversation. Did he even still want to marry you after you’d overreacted so intensely?
When it finally became time for you to go home for the day, you grabbed your things and sped to your car, before likewise speeding home. You were scared to see how Bucky thought of you now, but you wanted to apologize again and hopefully clear the air so the two of you could move on with your relationship.
Bucky’s motorcycle was in its designated parking spot once you’d arrived back at your apartment, so you knew he was home. You jumped out of the car and collected your things, locked the car, and rushed up the stairs to your apartment. When you opened the front door, your mouth fell open in shock.
The lights were dimmed throughout the apartment, and it smelled like someone had made your favorite meal. You spotted a few lit candles, and you smiled when you saw Bucky leaning over another one, attempting to light it.
“Hey,” you said softly, setting your things down next to the door as you closed it.
Bucky jumped in surprise, which caused him to burn his finger on the lighter he was using to light the candle. “Shit!” he exclaimed, shaking it off for a moment, before turning to you. “You’re, uh, home early today.”
You looked at the clock and raised an eyebrow. “Nope,” you replied, popping the ‘p.’ “Same time as always.”
“Oh,” Bucky said quietly. “Well, it feels earlier.” He looked around the room, and you swear you saw his cheeks turning a bit pink.
“What’s all this?” you wondered, smiling and making your way towards him. “Is it for your other girlfriend?” you joked, but his glare in response made you realize that he didn’t find your joke funny. “I’m sorry...about questioning you, about seeming controlling-”
“Oh, now don’t apologize for being controlling,” Bucky interrupted you. “You know I like that from time to time,” he continued with a smirk, and you could tell that he accepted your brief-yet-sincere apology.
“What’s going on?” you asked again as you wrapped your arms around his waist and tucked your head under his chin.
“It’s for you,” Bucky replied simply, kissing the top of your head. “You deserve a real proposal, not just me slamming a ring down on a dresser and expecting you to know what I mean.”
Your heart jumped, realizing that you were correct in your suspicions that he was going to propose. You pulled away and smiled up at him, leaning forward to kiss him softly.
Bucky deepened this kiss for a moment or two before pulling away and clapping his hands together once. “Well, let’s get this over with,” he said with a wink as he took your hand and led you to the kitchen table.
You could tell that Bucky was still nervous, but you appreciated all the effort he was putting in to make this special for you. You squeezed his hand in what you hoped was a comforting gesture, allowing him to take the lead in this ordeal.
“M’lady,” Bucky bowed with a wink as he pulled a chair out for you to sit in.
You giggled and complied, letting him act as serious or joking as he felt comfortable. After all, you were gonna be engaged by the end of the night...who were you to question the way he went about asking you to marry him?
a/n: again, i deeply apologize for my prolonged absence, and i hope some of you are still with me! i also hoped you enjoyed this one shot...it’s been a long long time since i’ve written anything other than academic essays, and i’m hoping this is written well and not too out of character for bucky. feedback is always appreciated! i love you all!