snap out of it @axadakedavra - Tumblr Blog

satire is “I’m going to take this concept to an extreme or absurd level in order to demonstrate how bizarre/nonsensical/illogical it is” and not “I said something bigoted but just kidding I didn’t really mean it hahaha”

bogleech

Dang it I’ve written like 5000 words trying to explain this and I only needed this post to reblog

apfelgranate

#i always remember that thing terry pratchett said #about how satire is meant to ridicule power #if you’re laughing at people who are hurting it’s not satire it’s bullying (tags via @vrabia)

redlipstickresurrected

Elsa Bleda (French-Turkish, b. 1988, Aix-les Bains, France, based Johannesburg, South Africa) Photography

vampiratecore

OKAY but what if Teddy tells Harry he doesn’t want kids And Harry’s like “what Teddy no please no” and everyone is like ???what And then Harry just goes “i didn’t call my second son Remus only bc i thought you’ll want to call your son like that you ruined everything i could have named him Remus instead of Albus Severus jesus christ hermione where’s the time turner”

caesuralesbian

The real problem with books-turned-movies isn’t “omg they didn’t include every single word in the book” it’s “omg they completely overlooked the main theme, threw out any significant allegories, took away all the emotional pull, an turned it into a boring action movie with a love triangle in it”

showerthoughtsofficial

It would be cool if after you died you could see the top 5 times you almost died

atlastheninth

5 times you didn’t die and one time you did

the-mighty-upside-down-pyramid

I will continue to call The Creature “Frankenstein” and no force in Heaven or Earth will impede that.

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

I also laughed at him totally deliberately calling attention to the fact Victor isn’t a real doctor because he dropped out of college and built a guy out of corpses

neonthebright

He punched the lycanthropy right out of wolfman

wackd-archive

did he just throw ygor out a window

copperbadge

I like that wolfman was his lawyer.

kelleysroom-deactivated20180401

sex scene = the audience is uncomfortable and learns nothing

batgirlsoundsystem-deactivated2

Sax scene= the audience is impressed and learns love for the saxophone

piraterey-deactivated20170723

lemme tell you i am so fucking tired of angsty vampires. its enough.

give me a newly-turned twenty-something vampire who hears about their newfound immortality and is like “thank god,” then proceeds to invest in some promising startups and fucks off to take a nap for two decades

give me a vampire thats only the tiniest bit phased at the blood diet because “eh, i tried paleo a while back and it was just as weird”

give me a vampire with self image issues who never has to avoid mirrors again because - bingo - no reflection

give me a genderqueer vampire who finally has an answer when someone asks their gender. “are you a boy or a girl?” “i am a vampire.” “but whats in your pants?” “fangs.”

best of all, give me a vampire chick who is so stoked about being nocturnal because she’s never been able to walk alone after dark before and it’s nice to be able to walk her friends home and know theyre all safe with her

justareallyboredfangirl

it’s funny that the most unrealistic and mythical part of this post is the twenty-something year old that doesn’t want to die

ankewehner

Not the part where the twenty-something vampire has enough money to invest?

blackandmildwithgod

The first sin. Misconception is that Eve was the first to sin when that’s not really all that true.

You see When God created everything and then Adam. He told him about the tree he said don’t eat of it.

God never told Eve.

When Eve was in the garden being tempted read that section you’ll find something interesting. Adam was right next to her and he didn’t say anything. He was using Eve as a Guinea pig.

Eve bit into the fruit nothing changed she handed it to Adam. And when he bit into it their eyes were opened.

So really the first sin was Man’s passive nature allowing something to happen he was told not to allow happen if he never ate their eyes may never have been opened but who knows.

murder-she-wont-deactivated2017

Originally posted by realitytvgifs

blackandmildwithgod

I was in a bible study we went over this part and I just sat there like “wait what?!?”

slightlycoolemma-deactivated201

Yup! This is so real!

poodlesaurus

So men, in essence, have never been shit.

elionking-deactivated20191020

Adam prolly had a fuck boy haircut

pastorwitch

My pastor told me that it gets worse. Adam straight up lied. He didn’t trust Eve so he told her that she could not eat or touch the tree. The deal was they couldn’t eat the fruit. They could’ve play volleyball with the damn thing all they wanted.

Adam did not trust Eve to follow God’s instructions so he gave her an extra rule to follow. And then, like OP said, he was a little shit and watched her eat anyway. And if you look in the rest of the scriptures, Adam gets blamed.

Get wrecked.

gruncheon

judevic

i want to be given verbal encouragement by a dog who speaks in a deep otherworldly voice

beaujes

ghostbusters are always like who are you gunna call? ghostbusters! but it’s hard enough to call the doctor’s office i’m not gunna call the ghostbusters i’d just live with a ghost in my house forever

beaujes

who you gunna call? no one i have anxiety

buzzfeed

Here Are 28 Things Millennials Are Killing In Cold Blood

betterbemeta

no mercy run

itchycoil

yohunny

And they say the millennial generation is lazy and entitled.

Here’s a secret: it’s not OUR JOB to adapt to the market. It’s not OUR JOB to buy napkins and golf clubs and drive to the mall on the other side of town to make sure it doesn’t go out of business.

Did previous generations kill the horse and wagons after the car was invited? Did those lazy citizens kill the town crier by buying into that newfangled newspaper business?

What people want and are ready to spend their money on will change over time. Today we have different goals and different standards - like I will invite my friends over for dinner and instead of napkins I’ll put a roll of paper towels on the table. And my friends won’t clutch their pearls and hiss “you uncultured swine” at me, because we value that paper towels are cheap and efficient! Napkins may be pretty but some of them end up being unused, and I’ll have to throw them away after the dinner and it’s a fucking waste.

Did your mall end up as an empty husk outside of town because those pesky millennials buy all their clothes online now? You lucky son of a gun. Now you get to use your ~*IMAGINATION*~ and repurpose that ugly windowless box into something actually useful. Why not a nice office space? (x)

Or how about you make the old stores into cute micro apartments? I WOULD LOVE TO LIVE IN ONE OF THESE! (x)

Are the stores fine but the parking lot empty because those cheap hipsters would rather take a bus or bike to the mall instead of buying a car like regular people? Do like they did in Seattle and turn it into a fucking beautiful water treatment facility and park. (x)

This thing collects storm-water runoff to create and provide nutrients to small pools and green areas. It works like a natural creek that ALSO filters out pollutants that would damage the salmon population! AS A MILLENNIAL I CAN SAY THAT THIS IS SO FUCKING UP MY ALLEY YOU HAVE NO IDEA. I WOULD GO TO THAT MALL, BUY A COFFEE AND GO OUT TO LOOK AT THE BIRDS.

Actual fucking plovers. When was the last time a parking lot did something for the environment except gathering upp more roadkill for the scavengers?

I could also go into why no-one is watching shitty sitcoms or boring movies because we have access to so much media that we can filter out the generic stuff that doesn’t appeal to us, but that is an essay in itself. We are extremely capable on spending it on media that speaks to us though (hey this is unrelated but did you know that Wonder Woman has passed 570M$ worldwide?)

TLDR: Market powers are entitled and used to people spending an ever-increasing amount of money on their shitty products. When this trend turns they are too unimaginative and lazy to do something about it so instead they’ll whine about how their former customers are “killing” them.

They can either DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT or spend the rest of their days crying into their surplus napkins.

redcandle17

Yes.

Also, the idolized lifestyle of the 1950s-2000s was unsustainable. The bubble burst, and my generation inherited a ruined world whose elders refuse acknowledge that their prosperity came at our expense.