bad sith! no cookie!

🍏 apple | they/them/their 30+, white, disabled, #actuallyautistic, lightsaber lesbian 🌼 swtor-focused. sith trash. worldbuilding · meta · fic · art · memes · shitposting 🌼 TRE Darth Malgus [EU].

[badsithnocookie]

pinned post

sup. i’m appo and this is my star war bagel.

yes:

the old republic, and particularly swtor

red sith/sith peanutbutter/tsis

fic/art/worldbuilding for the above

jedi meta and positivity

light side positivity

meta: fandom, canon, fanon

disneycanon: rogue one, resistance, fallen order, the mandalorian, thrawn

shitposting

puns

no:

dark side positivity/apologia

the sith/empire (of any era) were right/justified actually

the jedi/republic (of any era) were baddies/evil actually

the sequel trilogy (this is not a dunk on people who enjoyed it - i am just not one of them)

sals/dldr

about

i’m fruit. they/them/their

personal bagel: @itsmeappo

anon asks are OFF.

i do my utmost to tag for triggers and spoilers. if you need anything tagged please let me know!

[kaijuyuri]

star wars fans really just make anything up

[byjove]

I’m not Glup Shitto-ing you. He has a sexstache and everything.

[starwarsheritageposts]

star wars heritage post

[tomthanx]

Happy Pride to Biggs Darklighter

[badsithnocookie]

deeply funny that in the new short story shae vizla of all people keeps yapping on about how malgus of all people cares about 'honour'

decidedly less funny that biosword probably also share that opinion, but what can you do.

[annabelle--cane]

developed a real fondness lately for characters who experience a horrific act of violence and come out the other side saying "ah. I don't think I get to be me anymore. they took out the part that was me, killed it, and put something else back in its place, and now I'm whoever the hell that is." love it when someone becomes a corpse and replaces themself <3

[communistkenobi]

we’re so back

[badsithnocookie]

there's something vaguely ironic about taking ph4-lnx with me to fight gemini 16. like sure both of them yearn (understandably) for freedom after having been fucked over seven ways from sunday by organics but like. only one of them arguably achieves it, and it's not the one who tried to kill all of her sisters, yanno?

i say 'tries', mostly because, you know. ph4-lnx. exists. oh, 16, if only you'd tried talking to literally anyone like an adult. instead you were just Lesser Scorpio. alas, etc.

[ozvezdja]

its really unfortunate that padme no longer used the body double approach to security after aotc because the concept of the queen of fakeout deaths being married to the guy who loses his shit at the thought of her dying is honestly the wildest fucking thing and i think it's underutilised. let's give anakin a few trial runs before his big breakdown ok. maybe seeing padme getting assassinated live on space tv on a monthly basis will let him microdose on acceptance and inner peace. he can get into a different stage of grief each time and maybe when rots rolls around he will be fine

[badsithnocookie]

the best news in this livestream so far was the fact that the next gs won't have dvl bosses. tbh

[badsithnocookie]

hello??

[astronomical-bagel]

Third base is when your blood is on my hands

[astronomical-bagel]

Forth base is dying in front of you

[astronomical-bagel]

fifth base is coming back from the dead to die in front of you yet again

[astronomical-bagel]

Sixth base is seeing my shadow in your reflection as a representation how we parallel one another and how you are unable to move on from me despite the harm we caused one another. I may be gone but the memory of me will never die as I haunt you for the rest of your life.

[astronomical-bagel]

I’m going to be honest. First base is ideological disagreement and second base is when I threaten to kill you for the first time

[fonmythenmetz]

[badsithnocookie]

pointless au of the day:

jedi knight post chapter 2 interlude where instead of getting plot device'd out of your brainwashing by orgus dinn, vitiate has his newest brainwashed pet sith kill known traitor lord scourge and take his place as wrath. the jk then gets a loyalty test mission of some kind, followed by c3 being sent after baras for his attempts to usurp vitiate's place. you'd lose all your previous companions, but instead you'd have a sith one you'd end up recruiting - a former apprentice of baras's, left for dead on quesh and who has an obvious bone to pick with their former master.

bonus funnies: you'd still end up being sent to destroy sel makor on voss, given v being stuck in his fungeon and all. off topic aside about how in a competently written story, the jk's mission on voss would have been a fallback/contigency plan puppetered by vitiate and executed by an unwitting scourge. alas, i dare not assume competency on the part of karpyshit

at some point, maybe after the voss arc and its mandatory trip to the shrine of healing, the jk would start getting the option to rebel against vitiate and return to their jedi roots. after executing baras in the climactic encounter of c3, there'd be the option - if you've done all the prereqs - to betray vitiate and return to the republic, this time of your own volition.

(you'd probably be able to finally make contact with your old companions during the corellia arc, since you're running around on a republic-ish planet in a time of war - plenty of cover for skullduggery andthe like. entertaining and endearing shenanigans ensue with t7 and kira running interference while you fight off vitiate's influence - or not - in preperation for the final confrontation)

bonus: probably the option at the end to permenantly recruit your sith underling and their own apprentice, if you've bothered to do the companion questline and the prereqs to soften them up on leaving the sith and or empire. (if you haven't done this, then the sith underling betrays and tries to kill you, and is duly appointed vitiate's new wrath as a result)

[badsithnocookie]

not that ive really done anything with them in fic at all but really there probably should be some more blue members of clan cadera running around odessen. chiss age faster than humans iirc so they'd be young adults probably (at the oldest).

top ten things the republic will not be thrilled about etc

[badsithnocookie]

also torian's date night is v cute

[nell, enthusiastically: HEY. I hav ETHIS GREAT IDEA FOR HOW WE CAN GROW CLAN CADERA.

torian: [not opposed to this plan generally but] can. can chiss and humans even-

nell, even more enthusiastically: LETS FIND OUT :D]

[badsithnocookie]

logging in a week after doing story on nell to do her weekly and finding mail from said story finally arrived like

nell is a fcuking mandalorian hello???

icly i could put it down to her being a cadera (or like. even a lok, if we're stuck with ingame canon) but it's. yeah. god.

[penny-anna]

I'm not really a HanLuke shipper but I can imagine them hooking up early in their friendship & then Han later after various revelations having a personal crisis over whether or not it's weird to have sex with both halves of a set of twins

[penny-anna]

& like he can't ask anyone if it's weird without admitting that he's already done it. he could talk to Luke about it bcos obviously Luke already knows but he's kind of avoiding the subject with Luke in case drawing attention to the fact that he's dating Luke's sister prompts a shovel talk. he's pretty sure Luke can kill people with his brain now and he doesn't want to have that particular shovel talk if he an avoid it.

[cipheramnesia]

If Han came to me with this kind of question, I would be very supportive and make sure he didn't uncomfortable about having to ask the question because most of all this is about his feelings.

However, I would also desperately need to know if Luke used the force on that thang, and Han also knows I would ask, which is why he never brings these problems to me.

[penny-anna]

[badsithnocookie]

7.8.1 story update

it exisets. v tired of the whole 'she's half jedi and half sith and both sides are sometimes wrong oooooo' that happens any time darth nul is in the vicinity. first of all she was brainwashed into being a sith. secondly it's just. god if there's any one thing about the sw eu i hate its the oops all force centrism. but thats on me for still playing in this ballpit i guess

otherwise it was. okay i guess. rivix finally turning on the pc was very fun. the escape from the force field was dumb but i'm like 90% jadus was planning on/expecting it and 10% idiot plot

([redacted] grabbing the idiot ball pub side is. sigh. do not love this at all. but what can you do.)

i feel like at any given time anri is one right push away from giving up on the empire entirely like. babe they are sith its the sith empire i dont understand why you're still suprirsed by any of this

the fact that it was supposed to be a mainline story update is like. sigh. man i wish they weren't so short!! i wish swtor had literally any budget. i wish a lot of things.

-

was i sitting through parts of it though going 'aw yeah, this would be great for making my daughter miserable'? i mean. maybe