Send me a kiss while i Punch you in the face. @basheverythingyesterday - Tumblr Blog

itsapmseymour

Still wrapping my head around the fact the phrase "Hold Your Horses" is a play on the word Stable...

To be stable.

zzoupz

actuallyapathy

obsessed w how none of these are the real origin of the phrase

swanpaw

ourskiesaboveus

actually, caesar was stabbed 60 times. it just looked like 23 because, after the tumblr update,

unwastelandunbaby

asked a student what their favorite animal was today and they said “a cheetah AND a sloth” and I said “wow smart, you’ve got both ends of the speed spectrum covered!” and they looked at me like I was the only sensible adult they’d ever spoken to

would-you-survive-in-australia

That student WOULD survive in Australia.

missmorwen

The like heart just turned into a pumpkin on a Halloween post. Best easter egg ever

Edit: Just tested it and the post needs a halloween tag for it to work

one-time-i-dreamt

piendish

sad day in the new’s

horriblewarlock

DEVIOUS GNOME WAITS TO AMBUSH TRAVELLERS

charlesoberonn

"decay exists as an extant form of life" and "you cannot kill me in a way that matters" are amazing lines but the line that stuck with me the most in the mushroom post is "the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make"

The idea of emotions being like a substance produced by the soul, and that other beings can feel things at much greater intensity because their souls are more capable, it's terrifying and amazing to think about.

personsonable-deactivated201908

me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit

mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters

me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU

miaislying

Hey OP? What the FUCK does this mean?

personsonable-deactivated201908

decay exists as an extant form of life

miaislying

That’s a terrifying answer, have a nice day

whyenn-reader

disabilities are not superpowers, that being said having auditory processing disorder my entire life made me insane at freestyling, cause my mental libary of homophobic phrases (rhymes) is massive and keeps expanding every day

whyenn-reader

HOMOPHONIC PHRASES HOMOPHONIC HOMOPHONIC SOUNDALIKES RHYMES ECHOS

HAVING AN EXTENDED LIBRARY OF HOMOPHOBIC PHRASES DOES NOT HELP YOU WITH FREESTYLING UNLESS YOU ARE EMINEM.

whyenn-reader

NOT THIS ONE IM BEGGING

the rubber duck

For anyone curious what they mean by the rubber duck, rubber duck debugging is a tactic used by programmers to figure out bugs in the code. To do it, they explain the code, verbally, line by line, to the rubber duck until they find it.

It’s also very useful for writers, and I’ve used it multiple times with rubber ducks, stuffed animals, and my friends.

brunhiddensmusings

“when i say it out loud i realize where the stupid was”

elidyce

I literally cannot count the number of times I’ve gone to someone and told them ‘I can’t figure out what’s wrong with my story, please let me explain it to you’ and that was all it took. Sometimes they ask helpful questions like ‘did you remember to feed them’ or ‘so is this all on the same day’ but other times I don’t even need that, it just figures itself out as soon as I try to explain it to someone else.

It’s one of my go-to pieces of writing advice. You’re stuck on your story? sit down and tell me/someone all about it.

what-even-is-thiss

“Cats don’t actually love you”

A cat is a small creature in the middle of the food chain that is fully aware that you are a very large thing that could stomp its head in at any moment and yet it chooses to rest its tiny little head on your leg for a nap and spreads out on the floor near you exposing its belly and its most sensitive organs. It brings dead mice and bugs to you to share food.

Don’t you get it? This tiny thing trusts you. It wants to help you too. It licks your leg thinking that it’s helping. It kneads on you to find comfort. It shares its body warmth with you in the cold and gives you your space in the heat. It hisses at other mammals it sees outside including other cats in an effort to protect its family.

Cats love you so so much. But they will keep trying to eat plastic.

becuzitisbitter

You fucking wish the author was dead. The author is on twitter

ladyananas

2 sentence horror story

kvothes

so true

lesbianredpanda

Official Wednesday post

westiec

It's Tuesday

shopwitchvamp

Happy "Not Only Is It Not Friday, It's Not Even Thursday, Official Wednesday, It's Tuesday" Monday, everyone

queer-here-and-in-fear

shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

queer-here-and-in-fear

this is prime proof that this ENTIRE WEBSITE is autistic because nowhere else would a no tags post that's just an informative list about slang get this much traction.

queer-here-and-in-fear

anyway more addittions

“30-50 feral hogs” for someone using Very Specific Scenarios to justify holding back larger policy changes

“what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament” for how do you know that without being a part of it.

“anyone in this thread smoke weed” for the shit you people are saying is so off topic this might as well be a general discussion forum

“dogs are boys and cats are girls” for ooh ur mindset did not grow past 4th grade, huh

“color theory in a childrens hospital” for bending over backwards to not agree that YEA, that thing Came Off Weird

“you are a tar pit” for someone finding any reason to respond with outrage.

“is the __ in the room with us right now?” for I Don’t Think That’s Real.

“bean soup? im allergic to beans!” for ik this doesn’t work for you, but that’s not a flaw. not everything can be for you.

“people irl: hey man hows it going” for this will Never Matter irl

junkfoodcinemas

Enemy (2013) dir. Denis Villeneuve

beggars-opera

Right.

Because the military, an establishment that has historically been run for men, by men, while miles away from women for sometimes years at a time, has never allowed drag.

What the fuck