all i want for 2026 is that gigantic rancid AI bubble to finally burst in such a catastrophic way that the consequences will be so good and i'll never have to see another AI generated image ever again
It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!
It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.
PITCH: We call it Moon Day, and then every 7 years when it falls on a Monday, that's an even BIGGER deal and we call that Moon Day Monday and go absolutely apeshit about it (the next Moon Day Monday is in 2026 so we have a couple trial runs first)
I scheduled this in 2025 to give you all a week to make Moon Day Monday preparations! I think I will order a little rocket cake or bake some moon phase cookies!
Hyperfixating like mad here, but one of my fav bloodmary works on tumblr is @tomorobo-illust 's exquisitely-drawn Pacific Rim AU. In that they mentioned they were also inspired by Neon Genesis: Evangelion, and NGE was THE formative experience for me so once I started thinking about that, I couldn’t stop. So, here’s the contents of my brain.
Extra close-ups of Grace and Simon having a bad time fighting Angels:
Aaand extra waffling under the cut:
Grace 100% does not want to pilot the HM-01 but is strongarmed into it by Stratt. He tries to quit his job every episode (thinking of it like an anime series heh) but something always stops him
He is kept sane by his lovely teammates Yao and Ilyukhina. Hopefully nothing bad will happen to them…
Rocky and Adrian are from a distant space colony on terraformed planet Erid, which has a totally different language, culture and social norms to Earth, hence he still has his distinctive speaking patterns. They help maintain the EVAs and get told off for being too emotionally invested in Grace
Stratt helped design the entire concept of Evangelions. She may have piloted HM-00, the very first EVA, but Something Bad happened and the unit was dismantled to make the next three
She and Ava have a fierce rivalry with this dynamic:
The Consolidation of Iron makes up the portion of humanity that is spread across stations and space habitats. Since Angels arrive from distant space, they’re used to being the first line of defence and feel they have dibs on Angel combat
Their Iron Lung Evangelions are more adaptable and cheaper to build/power than the Hail Mary variant. The main downside is they chew through their pilots physical and mental health (all EVAs do this, but Iron Lungs are much worse for it), which led to them using expendable prisoners as pilots
They therefore go through pilots very quickly, but Simon is a very good EVA pilot, so he gets sent out to fight Angels the most. No-one uses his name, he's just Convict/Pilot 13
He loses his arm in a fight whilst defending HM-01 (against Ava’s orders). Grace spends the rest of the series figuring out how the hell to liberate Simon from the COI without kicking off a faction war. Lots of Capulet-Montague type romance ensues.
EDEN is an enigmatic death cult that believes the Angels have come to cleanse the world. They venerate the First Tree, which might be an Angel derivative; Simon’s exposure to it is why he has such a high sync rate with his EVA
They were formally labelled terrorists after they sabotaged Filament station’s defence systems during an Angel attack. Funnily enough the Angel was not merciful, which led to station wipeout and some 6,200 deaths. Simon has been atoning ever since.
I'm going to be honest with you I'm this 👌 close to actually writing this damn thing but it IS a very niche idea, I have no idea if anyone would actually read it. Let me know!
I used to enjoy Pokemon games a lot, but lately some of the newer entries have been kinda controversial due a variety of issues.
But instead of focusing on that, i'm here to bring you back to the past to the Nintendo DS era of Pokemon, where many (myself included) would say that the quality and care of the series was at it's peak!
Games included in this collection:
EVERYONE IS HERE!! Every single Pokemon game released for the Nintendo DS is featured in this pack. Two emulators are included in the set, just download and play
The thing is, even if you were lucky and your parents taught you how to clean, they probably didn't teach you how to clean the stuff you clean stuff with, like brushes, mops, sponges, rags, and so on. Or how to clean your cleaning appliances, like a dish washer, clothes washing machine, and clothes dryer and its ducts (if you have a ducted dryer), or a carpet cleaner, vacuum, Or how to clean up clean messes, like spilled bleach or detergent.
My parents threw away all of these things (even the vacuum cleaners and the dryer) when they got too dirty to function, because no one even told them THAT they could be cleaned. Cost them thousands of dollars over the years.
All I'm saying is that cleaning is not intuitive, and not knowing how to clean is not a moral failing, but it is something you can learn.
I'm going to reblog this post with resources for learning how to clean things and how to clean cleaning things (I'm not at my desk at the moment). If you have any favorites, please feel free to add them in too!
I like this video because it does a great job of introducing the basic foundations of house cleaning (and because he doesn't use bleach, which is a common allergy in addition to being awful to inhale). He also talks a little about how to clean a vacuum. And why you shouldn't put grease from your pots and pans down the sink drain. I also love that he mentions that different houses and different people have different needs and different versions of what clean and cleaning looks like.
He doesn't mention though that the toilet seat comes off. I take my toilet seat off to clean under the hinges and clean the seat more thoroughly once a quarter.
This is another video from the same guy about cleaning and depression. This advice, especially at the beginning, can feel really really difficult and oppressive to hear. However, I find that it's generally pretty solid. But I'm autistic and so is he, so that gets a massive Your Mileage May Vary stamp on it.
I have a favorite part of this video. It's from 10:52 to 12:36. I think we could all use to hear that. There's a HEFTY pause after that one. I promise the narration does come back.
I'm also going to recommend KC Davis' book "How To Keep House While Drowning"
This is a pair of videos about how to correctly load and use a dish washer.
The first one is a quick 1 minute 30 second overview on loading. I can't find the exact video I'm looking for, so consider this a substitute for that. If I can find the one I'm looking for, I'll swap it in.
The second is a half hour deep dive on dishwashers and detergents. The short form of that is you shouldn't need to pre-rinse anything, detergent pods are overpriced and can cause problems, some dishwashers have a filter in the bottom that needs to be cleaned (but most don't), run your sink until the water is HOT before starting your dish washer, and put a little detergent in the pre-rinse dispenser when you're washing extra dirty dishes (or on the inside of the door if your dishwasher doesn't have a pre-rinse dispenser).
How to clean a front load washer (with bleach). This should be done monthly or every time you wash really soiled clothes.
With expert tips and tricks for all types of washers.
How to clean a top loader (without the removable agitator thing). This should be done every 1-3 months depending on you unit, or every time you wash really soiled clothes.
Regular cleaning of a top-load washing machine will prolong the life of the appliance and leave your laundry cleaner and brighter.
How to clean a top loader (with the removable agitator thing). This should be done every month, or every time you wash really soiled clothes.
These carpet brushes are a LIFE SAVER if you have dogs. This thing allows me to go from vacuuming about 4 square feet before my vacuum is full to vacuuming half the living room (I don't vacuum often enough. You should vacuum weekly, and I just can't.). I have to unclog the vacuum less often. It fluffs up some of the flat spots in the carpet. And I also use the brush to shampoo my rugs in the spring.
A spot cleaner (or a carpet cleaner with a spot cleaner attachment) is another life saver, ESPECIALLY if you can afford to splurge on a heated one. I see them at Goodwill or at yard sales occasionally, and they're worth picking up. The shark one in the video is great too.
This channel is gold. There's tutorials for cleaning EVERYTHING on there. Just go subscribe!
Gonna throw another potential resource at the end of this very long list, which may be potentially helpful for others like me who loathe videos. It's... the weirdest thing that has genuinely been helpful to me in housekeeping. Absolutely full of useful advice, and bizarrely still relevant in large part. (Though, caveat, research ANYTHING to do with chemicals or cleaning products more complicated than vinegar + lemon + water for modern information.)
It's America's Housekeeping Book (1941). Available for free download on the Internet Archive. (Large PDF file at the link here).
The LISTS y'all. The step by step lists. The emphasis on efficiency and arranging spaces for the least resistance possible. The basic concept of "take a tray or basket into a room when you are tidying up so you can put things that belong elsewhere on it and take them out LATER in ONE GO".
I just think that Rocky is the most feral possessive bitch to ever exist when it comes to Grace. Sorry, if you don’t fix my space horse I’m NOT giving you any of the bacteria we almost died to get- oh hello mate Adrian, yes yes, Rocky DOES think this is perfectly rational, why do you ask? No, Rocky ran out of his Eridian Lexapro like four years ago this is now a hostage negotiation-
After Airplane responds to one too many Peerless Cucumber rants with “Bingge’s not gonna fuck you bro”, a not insignificant portion of the fan base pool their money to commission a new extra from Airplane where Bingge falls through a portal to the modern world, finds his most ardent defender, and brings him back to PIDW, upon which point it turns out Peerless Cucumber is actually a cucumber spirit who cultivated a human form, and her vegetable enemies transformed her into a man and tossed her through a portal. Upon her return, Peerless Cucumber turns back into a beautiful cucumber maiden, and the usual papaplot happens.
Shen Yuan hates the new extra. Obviously. He hates the implications on canon, he hates that his likeness was used, and most of all he hates that the cucumber maiden acts nothing like him.
When Bingge intentionally reverse transmigrates to find a nice Shizun and stumbles upon a weirdly kind shut-in, he gets the odd feeling this guy might be the one. Meanwhile, Shen Yuan believes the extra is happening in real life, and he REALLY doesn’t want to become a cucumber maiden who disappears into the harem except to provide meta commentary humor on occasion!!
Things that I couldn't leave in the tags below the cut
skeren : #svsss#[[I love this but I just know that Cucumber Maiden would actually be hilariously IC and SY just can't see it]]
mu-qingfang-stan-account : #diversity win: your unreliable narrator is gay#diversity win: your stallion protagonist was gay the whole time!!!#shen yuan#luo bingge#binggeyuan
bafflednpc : #svsss#SY: The Real Actual Merger of the Three Realms Demon Emperor Luo Binge is in my apartment#and I can't even brag about it online because everyone will call me cucumber girl#SY: Lord Luo I would be honored to assist you in whatever quest you are on. BUT there is one condition#SY: you CANNOT fall in love with me#LBH who hasn't even said anything yet: . . . This lord thinks he will manage.#and within 24hrs LBH has determined this IS his kind shizun and he WILL seduce him#meanwhile SY is dodging seduction attempts and wife plots#because he REFUSES to be turned into a woman or WORSE#allow airplane to have been right abt anything ever
sunderwight : #svsss#fully believe this is a scenario where shen yuan would hunt airplane down (find xiang fei) and then hunt him down again (for sport)
thetablestspoon : #i think shen yuan would eventually realise that the extra is#in fact#not happening#but for that period of time#CAN YOU IMAGINE THE PURE HORROR IN THAT MAN'S VEINS?#the worst porn you've ever read#and now it's somehow becoming real#i would just die#and knowing sy's tendencies#he might just too#svsss#scum villain self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#shang qinghua#xiang fei#luo binghe#luo bingge#binggeyuan
wastedwastelandme : #the scum villain's self saving system#“SY's terror at being trapped in a story with an inevitable terrible ending blinding him to what's really happening” Take 2!
konpeitocat : #shooting candied stars#cucumber maiden is fucking me uppppp#what does that MEAN#more importantly what does this beautiful vegetable bride look like
Fantastic advice!! And something I’ve realized I’ve been doing for myself these last 6-7 years, even though I never had a name for it.
Seriously, this is such a great way to go about organizing your home.
I really can’t express how much easier your life can be when you accept that there’s no objectively right way to do this kind of stuff, especially when you let go of the idea that it’s a moral failure when you can’t do something the “correct way” nor is it evidence of you being lazy.
Working with (leaning into) your natural limits and instincts can do wonders for you in your day-to-day life.
Danny doesn't have the best spatial awareness, you'd think he would given his bout as a vigilante, but his rogues all had the convenient ability of setting off his ghost sense and letting him know when to turn on his awareness.
So when he was taken in by Bruce Wayne in Gotham, far away from any ghosts or portals, he just didn't have any reason to be on guard. It worked well for him since his vigilante days were over and he could put all his focus on school again.
But you see, when he was first taken in, it was just him and his foster brother Tim staying at the manor.
Fast forward to now, Danny gets home from school to find not only Bruce waiting at the table for dinner, but a kid who looks surprisingly like Bruce??? The kid is small, rude and trying to be threatening in a way Danny doesn't really see as such, like the kid is like 8 how much could they really do???
Turns out a lot.
After Danny and Tim sat down and the introductions were made, Bruce filled them in on the situation that was Damian. Tim seemed to take it as a new puzzle, looking to Damian and Bruce periodically as if he could get answers simply by staring. Danny took it in stride, it isn't that unusually for a rich guy to have secret flings that result in children down the line.
Dinner was in full swing when it happened, there had been some bantering the entire time and many threats of bodily harm coming from Damian which weren't met with as many reprimands as Danny assumed it should. A distinct thunk sound was heard after a particularly harsh threat and Danny looked over to see a knife now embedded in Tim's chair where his head once was.
Before he could react, Bruce was standing with a sharp reprimand and Danny collided harshly with his chair as a new knife embedded itself in his shoulder. He cried out in shock, it has been over a year since his last ghost fight and honestly he forgot how much that hurts!
Aka, Bruce and Dick are forced to take Damian's threats more seriously when the civilian Danny is in the crossfire instead of just the trained vigilante Tim.
@dissociativehyperfixating loved this and could not resist writing a bit
It had been a while since Danny actually was in pain. The stop on vigilante activities since being fostered had helped with that, considering the portal got shut off and the ghosts in Gotham were minor shades in comparison.
And sure, Danny might have missed it the tiniest bit. Some of the things he had done were pretty cool, and who wouldn't miss flying. But he had more time to do schoolwork and less reasons to get detentions or have someone nagging him that he just needed to work harder in his academics. That and there wasn't any ectoweaponry around here, so he didn't get zapped or shocked anymore either.
It was actually pretty nice.
So it threw him for a loop when suddenly he gasped in the burning pain shoulder at the dinner table. He actually never felt something like that at a dinner. The closest would be bitten or poked at by the reanimated hotdogs or the turkey at Thanksgiving. But this was on a completely different level. It was different from the burn and staticky feel of ectoweaponry or one of Vlads' inventions.
The closest he could compare it do was when his leg got stuck in that bear trap Vlad had set out in the forest one time. The metal teeth punctured his skin and squeezed, it had been excruciating. It also had taken him by surprise too, just like the knife.
"What the fuck?" Danny hissed out throug clenched teeth, finally peeling his eyes away from the knife digging into his shoulder to look at Damian instead. The kid had a sneer on his face and seemed nonplussed that he just threw a knife at Tim and him.
Thank the Ancients Tim had moved when he did, if he hadn't... Danny looked back to Tim's chair and where another knife was sticking out of the wood. It was right where Tim's head had been.
Danny didn't even know where Tim was right now, and there were raised voices. He could feel someone talking to him and a hand lightly touching his shoulder that was getting uncomfortably wet with warm blood. Everything felt a bit muffled to be honest, his vission was blurring from the tears that had welled up in his eyes at the pain. It was getting harder to breathe.
"You almost killed Tim," Danny said weakly in shock. The thought made him feel shakey. He hadn't talked that much to Tim. The older teen was usually busy or looked so tired that Danny hoped Bruce would get him to sleep. But he had helped Danny a couple of times on his homework and was nice company when they ran into each other and Tim actually relaxed from whatever else he had going on.
Tim was the one who somehow knew what questions Danny was thinking and answered them easily. He was the one who helped Danny not feel so out of place the first two weeks he had been here.
The idea that he could have been killed at what was supposed to a be a family dinner, something that Danny actually had started to look forward too, made him feel sick. It made him angry. It scared him.
Danny gritted his teeth and grabbed the plate with his other hand. Pushing through the pain from the motion that made him want to choke, he threw the plate across the table and yelled, "YOU ALMOST KILLED HIM."
Everything froze.
The plate hadn't even been able to reach Damian, Danny's throw too weak to get any further. Instead, it smashed against the table and the other's plate. Shards of pristine white went flying, but Danny didn't care.
Dinner was absolutely ruined, but it had been ruined the moment Damian had spouted some threats about being the bloodson and rightful heir. How did it even go all wrong? It was supposed to be a regular dinner. Alfred had mentioned trying a new dish.
But the idea of eating made him feel sick with the knife sticking out of him and Tim's chair. Damian was seething, spouting more threats. Some in a language he couldn't even place while Bruce had a stony look on his face Danny had never seen before. His chest hurt, and Danny couldn't stop crying.
He almost choked when he felt hands touch his face. His eyes whipped toward someone who was somehow in front of him now.
Blue eyes.
Tim.
It was Tim.
"Danny, I need you to breathe," Tim said, his voice as firm as Alfred's when anyone tried to enter the kitchen. He was...fine. Danny didn't see any blood and Tim's hands were warm against his face. Not a cut to be seen anywhere on his face or head
"Breathe, Danny, breathe." Tim repeated, and finally, he did. It hurt, and Danny felt disgusted with the way he could feel the knife slightly move at the motion.
"It hurts." Danny choked out.
"I know," Tim glanced to the side. "But you'll be fine. We'll get you patched up, and it'll be okay."
Another set of hands appeared, these a much older pair.
"I'm sorry about the plates, Alfred," He whispered.
Alfred gave him a comforting smile while he worked to stauch the bleeding. "It's quite alright, I had started to dislike that particular set."
Danny didn't call him out on the lie.
He was already ruining whatever cloth Alfred had grabbed with his blood. And dinner was definitely ruined, so what were a few plates?
Tim is going to get so APPRECIATED by Danny after this, especially when he notices that Damian is focusing his ire mostly on him. That is HIS older brother. Nobody is just allowed to hurt him like that!
Ok ok ok. But what if. What if after maybe a week after the stabbing Danny just shows up in Tim's room in the middle of the night (Tim has been temporarily benched from nighttime work due to how clingy Danny has been with him since this happened). Danny wakes him up, already holding two go-bags packed and is just like:
"Get up, we need to get out of here. This place isn't safe. We can find a better place than this." And Tim, Tim is confused. And concerned. First off how the heck did Danny get into his room without waking him up, let alone pack what looks like a bag of his things without him knowing (Tim had all sorts of things set up to protect his things. Especially since Damian came into the house). But also, why did Danny think they needed to leave? Was this about Damian stabbing Danny? That would be understandable, but they'd been making progress on that (Damian had been told in no uncertain terms that attacking a civilian was not ok).
But when Tim expresses this the look Danny gives him is one of pure heartbreak. The younger boy moves over to kneel on the bed and grab his foster brother's hands between his own and proceeds to tell Tim that his life is imporant too. And Danny doesn't think this place was safe or healthy for Tim in any way, shape, or form. Because while Danny had gotten stabbed in the arm Tim nearly died. He would have died if he hadn't dodged. That knife would have killed him. And no one here seemed to care. Not even Tim himself. They all kept doting on Danny, but no one really reacted to the attack on Tim (or any of the future, if less possibly deadly, attacks on Tim since then).
Danny desperately wants his foster brother to understand that he's worth so much more than this. That his life is important. And that a place that doesn't treat him like he was expendable.
Tim is....taken off guard. It's kind of nice to know that Danny cares so much, but he doesn't know how to explain that he wasn't really in that much danger. Since he was trained to deal with that sort of thing. He was fine. Really (don't think about how much of a relief it was that someone was upset that he could have died. Don't think about how no one but Danny spoke out when Damian threatened his life. Don't think about it). But he can't explain any of that without outing himself as a member of the Bats. And outing the rest as well.
What is Tim supposed to do in this situation?
(Don't know if it would fit, but I also had an image of Tim coming out and telling Danny about his vigilante persona and Danny just. Doesn't care. Like being trained to deal with threats doesn't mean your life is worth less than a civilian's. And it still doesn't justify an attempted murder as his dinner table by another member of the household (Danny would know. Jazz made sure to press this into his mind more than once).
If Tim were to tell Danny that it was okay- that Tim is a trained vigilante who was never in any real danger- Danny would be Even More Upset. No, Tim! It is Not Okay that you got attacked in your home by someone who was meant to be family! You're meant to be safe at home! Home is supposed to be the one place you can finally relax and let your guard down; you shouldn't have to be on the lookout for your own family members trying to kill you.
The fact that Bruce and Dick have both gone out of their way to scold Damian every time he tries anything against Danny but haven't said a word when he attacks Tim? Danny hates it. Tim has just as much right to feel safe in his own home as Danny does.
The icing on the cake is when Danny says that the Manor is turning out to be just like his previous home.
Tim and the others never managed to get much out of Danny about his home life. He had told them that his house became dangerous for him, that it wasn't even safe for his big sister anymore but at least she was away for college. When they had suggested legal action against his parents, though, Danny had had a full blown panic attack, begging them not to let them find him.
So the fact that this was hitting a nerve for Danny? Not a good sign.
So really, what is Tim supposed to do but go? Danny's got a steely look in his eyes that Tim's never seen before and his voice is shaking, but his hands aren't, gripping two duffle bags like they hold everything important in the world.
Which, well. They kind of do.
"I have better go bags packed, if you don't mind a detour," Tim whispers, because he is nothing if not prepared and over prepared for every possibility. He's earned his paranoia. He wishes Danny hadn't earned his too.
So Danny follows him across the grounds to Drake Manor and Tim can't even bother to care that they're leaving clear footprints in the frost. Let Bruce and Dick see and know. He doesn't choke up in the back of his childhood closet when he gently disentangles the bags he has packed for him and Danny from the ones for Bruce, Dick, Alfred, Babs, Steph, and Cass, but it's a close thing. There would have been one here for Damian, if things had gone differently.
They wouldn't need the bags if things had gone differently.
They slip out into the night, Tim on a backup cycle with Danny behind him, their things secured as best as Bat-taught knots can get them. He left a note, filled with codes and counter codes, telling Bruce that they left of their own free will. It won't stop him from looking... At least it wouldn't have, before Damian. Now? Tim's not so sure.
He's not sure where they're going, either. He's been other places, but he's never lived anywhere but Gotham.
He's not sure what to do with the way something in his chest unknots and loosens as their tires eat away the asphalt under them and Gotham fades away until it can't reach them, even in the rearview.
Tim glances over at Danny. They're leaned up against a highway guardrail outside a greasy diner somewhere nameless in West Virginia, watching the sun rise. "Knew what?"
Danny picks at the tortilla wrapped around his honestly lackluster looking breakfast burrito. "About your, uh... nighttime... bird watching?" Tim stares blankly at him as Danny cringes. "Sorry, it's the best wording I could come up with," he says, rubbing the back of his neck as he glances around conspicuously.
"I can't believe you think the thing I had an issue with was your wording. What do you mean you knew?"
"Well y'all weren't exactly subtle." The look Danny levels at him is so judgemental it puts Alfred to shame. "I live with y'all. You went up to 'bed' perfectly fine and came down injured like. Multiple times. I know I'm oblivious, but I'm not that oblivious." He pauses, shredding more of the burrito, takes a deep breath and adds, a little shakily, "Ancients, now I know how Jazz felt when I was still trying to hide my vigilante injuries from her. She must have been tearing her hair out waiting for me to tell her."
Tim freezes, his plastic fork of pancakes halfway to his mouth. "I'm sorry, you're gonna have to run that one by me again."
Danny still won't meet his eyes, squinting up at the rising sun instead. "I was, y'know. Like you. Or, I guess I'd be lumped in more with the Flash or Superman or whatever."
Powered. A powered vigilante. It's so patently fucking ridiculous that Bruce managed to find yet another black-haired, blue-eyed orphan who likes to run around at night in kevlar (please, G-d, let Danny have had adequate protection in whatever he ran around in) that a giggle bursts out of Tim. Then another. And another, until he's laughing as tears run down his face, Danny staring at him in concern.
"Sorry, sorry," Tim says, hiccupping as he finally manages to wrestle his hysterics under control. "Just. Of course Bruce managed to find another orphan who flings himself at danger headfirst instead of dealing with his problems."
Danny smiles shakily. "Except for the orphan part, guilty as charged."
Right. Danny still has terrible parents, somewhere. They'll have to worry about that at some point, maybe. "So, why'd you stop when you came to Gotham? I like to think we'd have noticed someone else running around."
Danny shrugs, finally taking a full bite of his food, chewing as he thinks. "They didn't need me anymore. It- They-" He stops, takes a deep breath, and looks at Tim. "I don't know when I'll be able to tell you the whole thing. I can't right now, but I swear I will. Just suffice to say my friend Sam disagreed with the thing that was causing most of the town's Rogue problems. Violently. She and Tucker completely trashed the la-" Danny almost chokes on the word before taking a violent bite of burrito. "Well. They took care of it. I think Sam might still be doing community service for that, actually. Her parents kept her from juvie, and she made sure Tucker didn't get caught, so. Any lingering problems, our town's other vigilante can take care of."
Tim frowns, stuffing a forkful of rapidly cooling pancakes in his mouth. "What town has two vigilantes, one of whom disappeared suddenly, that I haven't heard of? You're not from Canada, are you?" He still should have heard about it, even in Canada, but it's the only thing he can think of.
Danny grimaces. "No, the town is in the US. Or, at least, it's never not been in the US."
"What the hell does that mean?"
Danny's back to fidgeting with his food instead of eating it, mouth twisiting uncomfortably. "It's complicated. The town's... hard to find, if you're not from there. And it, uh. Moves. It's been in a couple different states, though it's always in the Midwest. One time it was in Illinois, so we went on a class field trip to Chicago, and when we tried to go back, it was in Ohio. That was a mess." Danny smiles, small but fond, though it fades when he catches a glimpse of Tim's incredulous stare. His hand goes up to rub the back of his neck as his shoulders hunch. "It's, like, a supernatural thing. And also the government is involved, so. Like I said. Complicated."
Tim could press for more details. Something in him itches for information, to know everything he can possibly know about this dangerous town that could potentially cause problems for the two of them. Bruce would probably say he should press, that a fellow vigilante would have to understand the need to know, to prepare. But-
But Danny's shoulders are hunched around his ears and he's half curling away from Tim. But he's picked enough of his tortilla to shreds that the burrito filling is threatening to spill all over the cheap aluminum foil and Danny's hand. But they're both out here because of Bruce's expectations of what a vigilante "should" deal with, for the sake of the cause.
The sudden mental image of Bruce telling Danny to just bear with it because Damian's adjusting, he just doesn't understand, and he "can think of it like extra vigilance training, right?" makes Tim's blood boil. The thought of Bruce treating Danny like... like he treated Tim.
Ah. Tim can maybe understand why Danny showed up with packed bags in the middle of the night.
Instead of all the burning questions rattling around his brain, Tim takes a deep breath and says, "Man, and I thought living in Gotham was weird."
Danny's shoulders drop and he looks over at Tim with an expression so hopeful, it breaks Tim's heart. "Nah, living in Gotham is still weird as hell," he jokes back, a breathless grin on his face. His teeth look like they're maybe a little sharper than they should be. Has Tim really not noticed that before? "I mean, come on, you have a man-eating crocodile-person living in the sewers, dude."
"That's the Gotham special sauce. Guaranteed to make your life worse!" They both grin at each other, a little manic, and in a flash of inspiration, Tim suddenly realizes where he's headed. "Hey, if we go to Kansas, is your mystery town going to drop on top of us?"
Danny takes a thoughtful bite as Tim finally remembers he has food too and crams an entire cold pancake in his mouth at once. He's had worse. "Eh, probably not. It shows up in the Great Lake states a little more often than the plains states. And also, it doesn't just like. Drop on top of people. As far as I know." He looks suddenly preturbed.
"Cool." Tim consciously decides not to unpack that particular issue right now and pushes himself off the railing, closing the lid of his now empty takeout box. "In that case, we should probably find somewhere to stay and sleep because it's, quote, 'inadvisable,' end quote, for me to drive a motorcycle when I haven't slept in over 24 hours."
"Yeah, I'd agree with that," Danny says, cracking a smile. He takes one last big bite of burrito before wrapping the remains in the foil and following Tim to the roadside trash can. "What's in Kansas?"
Tim thinks of the few times he's visited Conner at the Kent's farm, the warm, homey feel of it that's still utterly foreign to him. "A friend. Somewhere to rest, maybe to stay." Mrs. Kent certainly won't turn them away. In fact, when she finds out why they're there, Tim has a suspicion he's going to have to stop her from calling Bruce immediately to yell at him.
Danny tries to lob his wrapper into the trash like a basketball and misses wildly, grumbling as he goes to pick it up. "A place to rest sounds nice."
Tim turns west, taking in the way the still-rising sun paints the Appalachian scenery a gentle gold. In Gotham, the sunrise is more likely to be cold and gray, hidden behind clouds. There's probably a metaphor in there, but he's too tired to think of it right now. "Yeah, it sure does, huh? C'mon, let's get going."
It takes almost exactly 24 hours of driving, spread over four days, to end up on the Kent's doorstep.
They detour a few times. Once, still in West Virginia, Tim stares down an ATM camera as he hits his maximum withdrawal limit for three separate identities and his own bank account and then tricks the machine into giving him more. If Bruce is looking, it won't even be hard to find them. Something reckless in Tim doesn't care at the same time he wants to turn around and drive back to New Jersey to prove to that stupid little brat that he's not running.
But. He is running. And maybe he deserves to run, but it burns all the same. He's supposed to be Robin! Robin doesn't run, he stands and fights!
The last time one of Tim's supposed brothers tried to kill him, he almost succeeded because Tim stood and fought. The only reason he's even alive is because Jason didn't even care about him, in particular, only Robin.
There's a lot to think about as he drives is what Tim's saying.
They left Gotham on a Friday night. It's a gorgeous, sunny Monday afternoon when Tim knocks on the door to the Kent family farmhouse, feeling abruptly foolish and like this was an abysmally stupid idea.
Martha Kent flings open the door faster than Tim expected, hands already on her hips. "Timothy Jackson Drake, your father is worried sick! What's gotten into you?"
Abruptly, shamefully, Tim feels his eyes burn as Danny audibly shifts behind him. "Hi Mrs. Kent. Can we come in?"
A hand on his arm. Tim glances back to see Danny frowning at Martha. "We can go. I'd hate to be a bother somewhere else," he mutters.
"You're not a bother for not wanting to get stabbed!" Tim snaps.
Martha's eyes widen as her lips thin. "I'm beginning to think Bruce left some things out of his explanation when he called to see if you'd been by. Why don't you two come in and fill in the blanks? Tim, I've met. Who's your friend?"
"This is Danny. My brother." Tim holds his head a little higher, almost daring Martha to contradict him, but she simply nods.
"I'm Martha Kent, but you can call me Martha if you want, sweetheart. Conner should be home from school in about half an hour. Until then, why don't I make some coffee and you can tell me what Bruce didn't."
"May I use your bathroom first, Mrs. Kent?" Danny asks, edging through the open door after Tim like a wild animal testing to see if the hand holding food is about to grab.
Tim frowns. "Oh, it's time to change your bandage, right? Take the first aid kit with you." Danny accepts it quietly, following Martha's directions around the corner.
As soon as he's gone, Martha turns to him with one eyebrow raised. "Bandages? Stabbed? Tim, what on Earth happened?"
So Tim takes a deep breath. And tells her.
When he finishes, Martha is so spitting mad he's a little surprised she's not breathing fire. "The nerve of that man!" she seethes. "He told me you two ran away because you were having trouble adjusting to having a new boy in the house."
Danny snorts, rounding the corner with such perfect timing that Tim knows he's been listening. "I don't think we were the ones with a problem."
"I'll say," Martha mutters. "I'll make allowances for cultural differences and adjustment periods, but not for acts of violence. I oughta call him right now, give him a piece of my mind-"
"Who is Ma decimating now?" calls Kon as the front door opens. "Hi Ma, hi Tim."
Tim rolls his eyes. "Stop greeting people by heartbeat," he calls back. "What if Danny wasn't already in the know? How am I supposed to explain that?"
"What are you talking about, there's no one else-" Kon rounds the corner and freezes, he and Danny staring at each other like startled deer. "...hi," Kon finally says. "Are you aware that you don't have a heartbeat?"
Tim chokes on nothing, whirling to stare at Danny, who shrinks back in his chair, looking a little wild around the eyes. "...I have one, it's just slower than you're expecting. It probably didn't register as a heartbeat."
Frowning, Kon furrows his brow before it smooths out. "Oh, there it is. What is that, eight beats a minute?"
"Five to seven, last time we measured."
"Huh." Kon points at himself. "Half Kryptonian, attempted clone of Superman, what's your deal?"
Danny somehow slides a little further down in his chair. "...half dead." Tim chokes on spit. Kon's eyes widen comically, and Tim hears Martha suck in a breath through her teeth. "I, uh, I have a clone too? I don't know if you've ever met another clone before, it might be nice for you. She's somewhere in Romania, I think, but I could probably get a hold of her, if she bothers to check her email any time in the next century-"
"Damn," Tim chokes out, cutting off Danny's ramble. "When you said you were a vigilante, I didn't think you meant you got the whole deluxe treatment. Usually that's the big city vigilante kind of messed up." It's a testament to how shaken Martha is that she doesn't tell him off for swearing.
Danny hitches one shoulder up, half a shrug, and doesn't meet anyone's eyes. "Well, you know me. Only one thing in the world I ever did by halves." He snorts sardonically at a joke only he gets before the smile vanishes and he levels a look at Martha. "Just... I mean, can you give me a few minutes to start running, if you're going to call the cops or the Justice League or somebody on me? I still have my bag packed and everything."
Martha looks like her heart is breaking, which is fair, because that's about how Tim feels. "Oh, honey, no, I'm not calling anybody on you. I might call Bruce to give him a piece of my mind, but otherwise, you're right as rain to stay right here."
Kon whistles through his teeth, cutting off whatever Danny was about to say. "What'd Bruce do?"
"Let his new kid stab Danny and try to stab me."
Kon's eye abruptly flare red. "What? Tim-"
"Please do not fly to Gotham to fist fight Bruce. He has Kryptonite in the house."
"I could just punch him once, really fast," Kon wheedles, hands clenched in shaking fists. "He wouldn't even have time to register that I was there."
Martha takes a deep breath, pulling herself together. "There will be none of that, young man. If you have energy to burn off, you can go throw around haybales."
Kon breathes in sharply before letting his shoulders slump, just a little, and unclenching his fists. "No, ma'am. I'm fine. Can I show Danny and Tim around?"
"Just trying to get out of chores," she says, fond. "Go ahead, dear.
Tim turns to Danny, who's been sitting half out of his chair and watching everyone with wary eyes, clearly ready to bolt. He decides that the best way forward is just to ignore that, offering a hand to haul Danny up from the table. "C'mon, the Kents have some cows that are pretty cute, if you're into that kind of thing."
Tim keeps the warm feeling in his chest off his face when Danny only hesitates a second before grabbing his hand. "Okay. If you think it'll be alright."
Kon shoves himself between them, slinging one arm around Tim's shoulders and one around Danny's. The other boy tenses for a split second before absolutely melting into the contact. "Yeah, it'll be fine. C'mon, Ma wants to fuss over the guest room, let's go before we get roped into helping."
Tim laughs and even Danny cracks a smile as they stumble out into the mid-afternoon sunshine. Maybe, hopefully someday soon, they'll even get a laugh out of him.
Ma Kent waits for the boys to leave before going to get her phone. She knows Kon will hear her, but that’s ok. She isn’t breaking her promise. She’s not calling the Justice League, or the government, or anything of the sort.
No. First she calls Clark and tells him to get his ass to the farm NOW. Don’t call anyone. Don’t speak to anyone beyond what you need to in order to finish up what you’re doing, just get back here. No, it’s not an immediate emergency, but she wants him home pronto.
That done, she hangs up and calls her old friend Alfred.
To say that Alfred is surprised to be getting a call from Martha Kent in the middle of the mess that is currently going on in his house would be an understatement. And her starting words just makes it all the worse.
“Alfred Pennyworth,” she begins, voice short, clipped, and bubbling with fury. “I am so disappointed in you right now!” Alfred blinks in shock, but before he could ask what he had done she plows on.
“Two boys, two children in your care, had to flee your home out of fear of being stabbed. And not only that! But I am hearing that not only was one of them actually stabbed, but the other had repeated attempts made against his life and nothing was done to stop it?!”
“I take it that Master Tim and Master Danny are safe then?” He asked, even as he tried to process through her ire and what he was being told.
“They certainly are!” She snapped back. “Far safer than they were in that madhouse you call a home! And don’t even think about sending any of your crew down here to harass or guilt trip them! They will be staying here, unmolested, until they decide they want to deal with any of your lot again. If they ever do!” Alfred bit back the desire to sigh. He’d known that Master Bruce’s decision on how to deal with Young Master Damien was going to bite them in the end. And look. It had.
“Of course,” he agreed sadly. “Are they both ok at least?”
“That depends on how you describe ok,” she told him, fury boiling down to a simmer at his easy agreement. “Danny is still healing from a stab wound and Tim is going to take a lot of work to undo his belief that he is inherently worth less than others around him.”
“He what?” Alfred asked, alarmed. He knew that Tim had low self esteem issues, but that badly?
“Oh yes!” Martha spat back. “The poor boy thought it was perfectly fine for someone to be trying to kill him on a regular basis in his own home. Whether that’s because he’s trained, and therefore should be able to guard himself at all times or because he believes he’s not a true member of the family is iffy. I’m wagering on a mixture of both. But either way, Danny has already begun attempting to fix it. And I intend to do my best to undo the damage as well. And I won’t have any of your lot breaking him again. Is that understood?”
“Perfectly,” he agreed, already starting to plan on how to try and fix things in his own house to help make it safe for the kids if they decided to come back. “Thank you for looking after them, Martha.”
“Of course,” Martha replied stiffly. “It’s the least I can do. They’re good boys.”
“They are,” Alfred agreed again with the smallest of sighs. “Thank you for letting me know they are alright. You have given me a lot to think about.”
“Of course,” she replied, softening slightly. “Good luck with all that, Alfred.”
“Thank you,” he told her. “I fear I’m going to need all the luck I can get.”
“I’d say. “She huffed a slight laugh before hardening again. “Oh, and Alfred? If I find out that any of your brood show up here as a result of this conversation you can forget about any future calls. Is that understood?”
“Yes, of course,” he agreed immediately.
“Good.” He could practically hear her sharp nod. “I’m going to let you go now. Clark just got home and I’m sure you have a lot of work to do.”
“Alright,” he replied. “Have a good day, Martha. And thank you again.”
And with that, the call ended. Leaving Alfred staring at the encrypted phone in his hand and pondering on many of his recent choices. After a moment he shook himself and straightened up, squaring his shoulders. It was time to get to work. There was a lot to be done after all. Starting with a family meeting.
Not only did my fried rice panel take off in a way I wasn't expecting but my POST about the fried rice panel also took off in a way I wasn't expecting please let me rest
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