the hot mess express.

Shannan. 32. married. I laugh too much and sleep too little. the world is very hard, so I am here trying to be kind.

[aristotlemencloza]

Grief is just love with no place to go.

– unknown // Art piece by Ikenaga Yasunari

[angryinterrobang]

“Do you like that show?”

“I certainly enjoy the self indulgent version of it I wrote in my head after it began to disappoint me.”

[inkskinned]

“if you take medication for that, you’ll be taking medication all your life!!” yeah, and?? bud, i already put on my glasses every morning. it’s like. a condition of mine, not a side hobby i’m pursuing irresponsibly. 

[adhd-hippie]

The kind of people who say this are also the kind of people who carry a bottle of advil in their purse and slam four every time their ponytail is too tight.

[a-dorin]

Op’s caption was: Single father supports his sons :)

[prole-log]

[whattheplot]

Three months ago I pitched an idea for a party game. Today, ‘WHAT THE PLOT?!™’ is a real game and available for pre-order! I am so excited. Thank you everyone for your support!

[whattheplot]

Click on a picture for higher quality! Tumblr compresses pictures so they might look a bit blurry!

[whattheplot]

What The Plot?!™ is now available for pre-order on planet Earth until January 1st! Definitely check it out; it’s pretty-ducking-epic thanks to your feedback and input!

https://creators.teespring.com/what-the-plot

[johnnyishereforever]

omg they actually did it!!

[cyhyryth-deactivated20210905]

guys ive been waiting for this. If I get it will you guys play? @folklorefairyqueen @moonxchaos

[folklorefairyqueen]

YES OMG I WANNA PLAY THIS RIGHT NOW @cyhyryth

[moonfireroulette]

this by itself already makes me wanna play this game 😂😂😂

[whattheplot]

UPDATE: Friday 27, March, 2020

It’s a real game now! The manufacturer sent us 5 copies! The quality is amazing! Thank you all for making this game a reality! The games are currently being shipped from Poland to a fulfillment center in the US and the Czech Republic. If you preordered the game, you can expect to have it in your hands at the end of April (so far, the pandemic has not been impeding our schedule).

The print quality of the cards is superb. The photos don’t do it justice! The text is a bit blurry in the pictures, but it’s crystal clear!

If you want to get notified when the next pre-order round drops - click here!

[golemgold]

This actually looks so good! I will definitely be getting this!

[justamemeyboy]

@whattheplot are you ever gunna bring this back?

[whattheplot]

What The Plot?!™ is now available for pre-order until September 21st!

Get is here

[idontknowspanish]

Now this is what I call a party game!

[lostdreamerinlove]

This game is way to much fun absolutely loving it

[krystal-prisms]

Fuck, I want this

[ourartandsouls]

Holy crap I need this game!

[whattheplot]

Only 2 days left!

creators.teespring.com/what-the-plot

[pfdiva]

I own this game and it is a BLAST to play

[googifs]

I can’t stop watching it.

[frosty3thefrostening]

For fans of chocolate and fans of Particle Annihilation Beam technology

[qvilligan]

Tbh i never knee this had a name, but now i do and am now more powerful than you could possibly imagine

[m--ood-deactivated20181217]

Magical encounter while free falling.

[baconmancr]

Can you imagine being that bird? You see a big falling dot off in the distance, so you go to investigate. And it’s a human. Just, like, hanging out, in the middle of the sky. Plumbing toward earth at terminal velocity.

“Huh, that’s weird” you think to yourself.

You land on them. They seem nonplussed by their predicament.

But you’re a busy bird, you’ve got places to be. So you just fly off. Good luck, crazy human. Hope you make it.

[goddesssword]

[quasi-normalcy]

“Oh, hey, I guess they can fly. I did not know that.”

[folieassdeux]

i mean same

[staceyshere]

Big same

[secretsunkept]

Mood.

[honeysucklepink]

“Yeah, it’s the only way to end the pandemic.”

“Pandem…? Oh yeah that too.”

[lucy8675309]

[kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd]

it's 2022. donald trump has died in disgrace days after being impeached and jailed. my chemical romance's new album is coming out the same day as the new spiderverse movie. the lizzo and janelle monaé collab song is blowing up the radio. lil nas x has a verse in it. you and your partner have time and energy for dates after work after jeff bezos' assets have been seized and distributed to the public in the wake of his arrest for keeping employees in unsafe working conditions.

[baconis42]

oh what a life

[dee-the-red-witch]

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

[jemariel]

Everyone has been vaccinated for free and the virus hasn’t caused a single death in months.

Those dates you go on with your partner? They’re in public. Unmasked. Your server smiles at you. Everyone feels safe.

You can hug your friends.

You can see a movie. The people in the movie are gay people of color and they kiss and live happily ever after.

And so will you.

[do-angels-dream-of-starry-seas]

LIKE TO CHARGE, REBLOG TO CAST

[labelleizzy]

Or do both for twice the punch!

[lgbt-tiktoks]

Caption:

[Person 1: WALL-E and EVE are both nonbinary.

Person 2: What are you talking about? Keep your... Liberal politics out of my kid’s movie. WALL-E’s a boy and EVE is a girl.

Person 1: But they’re... they’re robots. They don’t have genitals.

Person 2: Yeah but like WALL-E is square and does construction and EVE is like feminine and sexy looking.

Person 1: So, gender is a matter of presentation and expression, not a matter of biology.

Person 2: No! Gender’s just about your genitals.

Person 1: Then, WALL-E’s nonbinary. He doesn’t have genitals.

Person 2: No, WALL-E’s a boy.

Person 1: Then gender is a matter of expression an-

Person 2: No! Gender is just biological!

Person 1: Then WALL-E doesn’t have a gender

Person 2: No! He’s a boy robot!

Person 1: Look I don’t have anything going on. I can do this all day.]

[one-lonely-whumperfly]

The hero shows up at the villain’s doorstep one night. They’re shivering, bleeding, scared. There’s also a slightly dazed look in their eyes– they were drugged. They look like they were assaulted. Looking up at the villain, swaying slightly as they’re close to passing out, they mumble “…didn’t know where else to go…” then collapse into the villain’s arms.

[nerdy-birdy18]

Oooohhhh bitch

[crewdlydrawn-deactivated2022072]

This… but also the reverse

[samwellwinchesterthebrave]

[weaponsofclairvoyance]

the plot to yoi is genuinely so fucking funny like. this dude got drunk and danced with me and i was so haunted by his beauty all year that i quit my job as a world famous athlete and flew to japan. turns out he doesn't remember our first meeting and thought i was just a lunatic who showed up at his door and decided i was his boyfriend and he went along with it because im hot. we're engaged now

[weaponsofclairvoyance]

yoi from viktor's perspective: my darling my lost love.. finally we reunite and can be together! i will teach you everything i know and stay by your side and you will finally get all the love you deserve💛

yuuri's perspective: why is my celebrity crush in my house and how do i make him leave

[fischotterkunst]

yall look at this shit ad*be is tryna pull now on ppl who have outdated software:

(note for context: i’m all for piracy, but in this case my copy of CS6 was downloaded years ago when they were giving it away to students. i got it totally legally.)

[fischotterkunst]

so here is what NOT to do if you’re a loyal fan of adobe who has the cash to shell out for a newer and shittier version of the product you already paid for.

1) DON’T use your search bar to find and open the Run app

2) DON’T type in services.msc

3) DON’T find Adobe Genuine Software Integrity Services and right-click to get a dropdown menu, and don’t select ‘properties’

4) if you happen to click properties, DON’T use the startup type dropdown to locate the option to disable the program. be sure you DON’T click apply to finalize that change. 

5) DO NOT do the same thing in order to also disable Adobe Genuine Software Monitor 

if you do all of these things, this WILL disable adobe’s ability to monitor the software, and you will be forced to continue using the same older software that you already paid for instead of having to sign up for a newer, shittier version and pay more for it. so if you have lots of cash to spare and are cool with putting it the pockets of racketeering capitalists, definitely don’t do any of these things. 

however, you SHOULD reblog this to spread the word, as we certainly want to make sure lots of people know what NOT to do :)

[hideousgourd]

I’M SORRY MA'AM. I KNOW YOU’RE UPSET.

Pretend to be upset.

[june-egbert-official]

OP how could you

I hope none of my friends who use Adobe programs find this, follow your detailed instructions, and spread the word. That would be devastating!

[toptony]

Does anybody else get legitimately worried when a fanfic author who was updating regularly just suddenly disappears with no warning? Like, is it a serious case of writers block or are they in a coma? Did they just up and quit? Was it me? Were my reviews not good enough?! Did they die 😳?! Were they kidnapped? Do I need to file a missing persons report? Excuse me officer, there’s been 13 weekly updates and now nothing for months! Find them! What’s their name?! Name!? I don’t know their name but they write 3k+ chapters and I need them safe and back in my life!

[naughtylupine-deactivated202305]

Sir, that’s my emotional support fanfic author.

[drarrymylove]

Officer: i’m sorry, but you can’t file this person missing.

Me: you don’t have all the facts.

Officer: which are?

Me: i love them.

[phinarei]

So, painful story, but I’ve really needed to tell it for a while.

My best friend, the woman I loved for 13 years, was a fic writer in the middle of an especially long piece. She updated on a schedule and had for years. She had a small, but loyal following.

And then she died out of nowhere. One day we were laughing, the next she was in a coma, 3 days later she was dead. She hadn’t been ill and to this day we don’t know what took her. She was just gone.

I knew she had friends all over the world so I went into her email to see if I could find addresses and notify people after a week of blind grief. In her inbox were about a dozen concerned messages from her readers. I cried. I cried and cried and I responded to all of them, telling people she had passed.

And the messages kept coming. Those people spread the word and message after message came in, most of them addressed to me now, as I had given those original readers my contact info. There were words of comfort and grief and just every emotion imaginable in that scenario. I wrote back to them all, thanking them and comforting them.

For months after she died, during the worst of my grief, I had those messages. I had those people. And they had me. I really think I might not have made it to the other side without them.

So, the fact that you care? That you think of them? That these authors who became a presence in your world are missed when they aren’t there? It means something very real. On the off chance that the author did die? Anyone who has seen this post will find comfort during the loss of their friend or family member, knowing that you all exist. That they aren’t alone. That you CARE that the world now lacks their loved one.

So, yeah. I’ve seen this post and ones like it for years and wanted to share this story. I finally could today.

Thank you, every person who reblogged this post. People like you are the biggest reason I’m alive today.

[sgam76]

Always remember. When you write you leave a footprint for people to follow, and you may be, completely unaware, an important part of their life.

[chrisriddellblog]

Instructions by Neil Gaiman

[soracities]

“The Night Vale Medical Board offers the following diet tip: Everything you eat is sunlight made physical. You are radiant and forever.”

— Welcome to Nightvale (via echymosis)