Match my Heartbeat to your Rhythm - Pynch Band AU
The Strangest Kind of Magic - Raven Cycle Fantasy/Magic AU
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JBB: An Artblog!

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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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@behindtheatlantic
Match my Heartbeat to your Rhythm - Pynch Band AU
The Strangest Kind of Magic - Raven Cycle Fantasy/Magic AU
+ More on my AO3
My Fanfic writing tag
My original writing tag
Did anyone ever like attempt to document and compile the variations of Barney the dinosaur murder ballads across the elementary school system in the early 2000s. Like legit it has always fascinated me as a phenomena and I would love to know if there were like traceable regional variations or what.
Looking at the tags so far I’m kind of fascinated by how much the ‘I Love You’ parodies vary in their phrasing/murder weapons but the ‘Joy to the World’ ones are nearly identical
here is my collection of barney murder songs as they appeared in the notes and comments of this post at about 4 pm pacific 7/25, somewhat arbitrarily color coded to show similar memes. it appears that "baseball bat and 2x4" is the mode configuration but there is so much variation that that exact phrasing only makes up a small part of the set. if i knew more about statistical modeling i would turn this into some kind of data tree that shows which phrases are most likely to follow other phrases.
Hey so not to be all "what the fuck, Youths," but...what the fuck, Youths
I'd forgotten this was a thing but also I'm not from the states so I'd wonder how many countries this spread to? Because this is pre-internet days which implies it spread organically and in isolation in different groups of kids in different countries across the world, so like, are all kids slightly homicidal?
Its been a while since i have stayed up past midnight to read a book. But when you have a beefy queer monster hunter? Hmmmmm.... then I dont need much persuading
brain, heart: idiot bitches who never know what they want
stomach, genitals: idiot bitches who know exactly what they want and never shut up about it
lungs, kidneys, liver: pretty chill organs, all told. if these ones are complaining then i'm usually the one who fucked up
Why did 4 months of this year go by in like a week
Where am I
to the 2025-26 vancouver canucks.
quote from chapter 12, part viii, of the goldfinch by donna tartt.
i don’t know how many people on tumblr know about “verticals” - they’re cheaply made soap operas that are filmed vertically so you can watch them on your phone. they’re infamous in the acting world because of the poor writing and nonsensical plots - almost always has something to do with a mafia boss or a vampire or a werewolf - and they always have insane titles like “pregnant with the ceo’s baby” or “forced to marry the alpha king.” i come across tons of them on casting websites and they all have wild titles and descriptions but none of them, None of Them, have truly grabbed me like the title i saw today:
Dr. Fangs: He Prescribes Bites
so. a meme from me. to show how ive been lately
talking about impenetrable accents/dialect just reminded me. when I was in Milan a couple of years back I was staying in this little rathole hotel and I had the biggest fucking migraine, so I was like non c'è problema I'll just go buy painkillers. of course every pharmacy on the map in a three block radius was closed, so my stupid ass just starts wandering around trying to figure out on the fly if you can get OTC from supermarkets in italy.
I walk into this little everything store (to my foreign eyes the kind of place that back home could sell you a bunch of carrots, a 6-pack of beer, pantyhose, bleach and a screwdriver set) and I see some household basics in the back but not what I need. with the confidence of a person who is only in the city for 3 days because he got bored and packed a bag and booked the cheapest flight available the week before (<= MENTAL ILLNESS), I was like no worries I know some italian, I can just ask.
I grab a bottle of water, walk up to the counter, and I'm like Ciao, hai il paracetamolo? And the guy is like che, and I'm like paracetamolo. Per la mia testa. And he's like che?
This is where I would have said 'aspirina' except I can't take aspirin for medical reasons, or 'antidolorifico' except I don't know that word and I've got no phone data for google translate and also I'm stupid. So in my fucked up leith-glasgow-italian accent I'm like paaa-ra-cetta-mollll-ooo. He's like ohhh bene, bene, and he calls another guy out of the back and asks him to go get something. Other guy then walks out of the store into the street, and before I can be like hey, che la fuck, he comes back and hands me a huge bundle of herbs.
At this point I'm like okay this entire interaction has been a bust, but these guys have been very nice and patient and they're both smiling happily at me because they've been of service, so I'm like ahh perfetto, grazie, pay them a couple of euros and leave.
EVENTUALLY I find a pharmacy that's open, and my head is fucking killing me, and my phone still isn't connecting, and now I have this small shrubbery poking out of my coat pocket, so I don't even bother looking around the shelves. I just walk straight to the counter and I'm like uhh ciao, scusi. And hearing my nightmare of an accent the guy answers in english and I'm like thank christ, do you please have paracetamol. Not aspirin, I can't take aspirin. And he's like yeah yeah hold on, goes into the back, comes out with what I need.
Only when he comes out he gives me this look, and then he starts laughing. And then he pretends he's not laughing and rings me up and I pay, and as I'm leaving I can see him losing it. But I don't care, my head is going to explode, I'm going back to the rathole to close the blinds and fall comatose for four hours.
When I get back to my hotel room I take off my coat and remember the huge bouquet of herbs in my pocket. They smell amazing, and I'm like I'm pretty sure this is parsley in which case I can just get some tomatoes and mozzarella later and make it work. but since I have no idea what that interaction was, I want to make sure. I bring out my phone to get a visual reference of what parsley leaves look like, and because I was using it for google translate earlier I put 'parsley' in the wrong box like a dope and translate it to italian.
prezzemolo
I wish I could have been the pharmacist in the moment he looked at my tired pissed off anglophone ass, heard me say 'paracetamol' in my fucked up accent, and turned around saw what was in my pocket. I'd have lost my shit too.
Respect to the first guys who, after you left, said “what a nice bloke. He looked so tired. We can relate. Whom amongst us has NOT had a parsley-related emergency”
ms word ms excel and ms powerpoint are all snooty disagreeable ladies who wont speak to me due to my meager dowry but then i meet their beautiful sister ms paint whos clumsy but charming and we fall in beautiful love. and i become mr paint
“Vicious” Leopard seal tries to keep national geographic photographer alive by feeding him penguins.
@maculategiraffe tags
My favorite thing about earth reentry is you can talk about angles and controlled burns forever but at the end of the day you’re really just whipping a minivan into the planet’s atmosphere and hoping they slow down enough not to shatter by the time they hit the ocean 
WHAT ARE YALL READING RN you must tell me