[certifiedceliac]

You've heard of "You don't look sick!" and "Everyone feels a little fatigued now and then!" but let's all hear it for:

🔥🎉"Just wait until you get older!"🔥🎉

[aro-culture-is]

Aro culture is starting a new anime that seemed interesting, and oh, the main character has huge aroace vibes it’s going to be enjoyable, but wow, suddenly he falls in love?? Why????Like,,, just give me the aroace wholesomeness I need is that too much to ask (I say that because I just watched SAO and Why did they find it necessary to add romance??? It just ruins the story I don’t even want to watch anymore)

.

[bellusvoid]

Chuunibyou is literally a romance and it says it in the full title, but the main characters really did give off aroace and qpr vibes imo.

[robertoe-deactivated20210924]

[lazygravez]

what a wonderful day to remind ppl that:

aplatonic DOES NOT mean "doesnt want friends"

aplatonic DOES NOT mean "has no friends"

aplatonic is a term some aromantic ppl may use if they dont want a tomantic relationship, dont wish to replace romance with a friendship, and does not care for being in a qpr

its not an orientation

dont make fun of our terms just because youre not familiar with them or because you see all aros as cringey teens

[arovaricious]

Alright im tired of the aro community spreading misinfo about aplatonic especially the kind thats full of ableism so lets go through this, point by point:

aplatonic is: little to no platonic attraction which may or may not include a lack of desire for friendship

aplatonic can also mean having difficulty making and/or maintaining platonic relationships which may or may not mean we have less friendships than average

aplatonic is a term ANYONE can use if the above definitions resonate with them, it exists independently from the concept of romance/romantic attraction; conflating aplatonic with not desiring a qpr** comes from when its assumed qprs must include platonic attraction (they do not have to)

for many of us it literally is a part of our orientation, aplatonic was made by neurodivergent aros not just with aros in mind but especially with nd and/or trauma survivors in mind

not making fun of aplatonic includes not joining ableists in the erasure or demonization or infantilization of those who dont experience/desire, and/or have difficulty with platonic relationships; by distancing aplatonic from things you may see as "cringy" or "childlike" when in fact those things are not inherently either, you are associating us that have these qualities with ableist assumptions

**a better term for not desiring a qpr/not experiencing qp attraction is aqueerplatonic, so as not to continue conflating aplatonic with it

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

Your a-spec identity can have a cause. It doesn't matter why a label is useful for you or describes your experiences, only that it does.

[daring-elm]

4am hot take from your local alloaro: you can't support us if you don't make an effort to unlearn sex negativity, especially in regards to sex outside of long-term relationships

there's nothing inherently wrong or less valuable about sex with a friend, casual sex, one-night stands, etc—sex isn't morally wrong for not happening between two committed romantic (or queerplatonic) partners and insisting that it is is amatonormative and arophobic

[aromanticaardvark]

Aromantic/Platonic/queerplatonic dating checklist

And here’s a rebloggable version.

This can be used by anyone I suppose, but is made specifically for people with a queerplatonic/platonic/non-romantic partner. You could use this with friends, too! 

Kissing (forehead, cheek, etc): Kissing (mouth): Hand holding:  Cuddling:  Hugging:  Other affectionate touching: Hugging in public:  Cuddling in public:  Kissing (forehead, cheek, etc) in public:  Kissing (mouth) in public:  Hand holding in public:  Other affectionate touch in public:   Eye gazing: Crying on:  Being cried on:   Massage (giving):  Massage (receiving):  Hair brushing (giving):  Hair brushing (receiving):  Nail painting (giving):  Nail painting (receiving):  Shaving (giving):  Shaving (receiving):  Bathing together (with bathing suits):  Bathing together (naked):  Seeing my partner naked:  My partner seeing me naked: Feeding my partner:  Being fed by my partner:  Tickling (being tickled):  Tickling (doing the tickling): Terms of endearment:  Being called “best friend”:  Being called “partner”:  Being called romantically-coded words (boyfriend, girlfriend, etc): Me having other platonic partners:  My partner having other platonic partners:  Me having other romantic partners:  My partner having other romantic partners: My partner doing romantic-coded things with someone else:  Me doing romantic-coded things with someone else:  My partner doing sexual things with someone else:  Me doing sexual things with someone else:   Touching my partner sexually:  Being touched by my partner sexually: Having sex of any kind with my partner [specify if yes]: Sexual kink with my partner [specify if yes]: Non-sexual kink with my partner [specify if yes]:  “Romantically coded” gifts (flowers, chocolates, etc):  Dancing:  Bed sharing (non-affectionate):  Bed sharing (cuddling): Tucking my partner in:  Being tucked in: Living together:  [Platonic] marriage:  Raising children together: Having pets together: Other stipulations/concerns:

I think that covers everything. If it doesn’t, please let me know and I’ll add it!

 And the categories could probably be “yes”, “yes, but ask first”, “yes, but with certain restrictions”, “no”, “maybe; ask first”. 

[rosedbudboy-deactivated20220917]

question: what does /hj or /j mean

they’re called tone indicators, they help with telling the tone of anything you say through text because sometimes its hard to tell!!

/j = joking

/hj = half joking

/s = sarcastic

/srs = serious

/p = platonic

/r = romantic

/l or /ly = lyrics

/t = teasing

/nm = not actually mad or upset

/nc or /neg = negative connotation

/pc or /pos = positive connotation

/lh = lighthearted

/nbh = nobody here (for when you’re vagueing someone in a vent)

/m = metaphorically

/li = literally

/ij = inside joke

/rh or /rt = rhetorical question

/gen = genuine question

/hyp = hyperbole

/c = copypasta

/sx or /x = sexual intent

/nsx or /nx = non-sexual intent

/th = threat

/cb = clickbait

/f = fake

/g = genuine

heres a list of them!! you should use them!!

[aro-and-ace-memes-thoughts]

Just a reminder that non-ace aros exist and are as important for the aspec community as ace people. Aro isn't a subset of ace, but an identity on its own. Aspec should be a safe community for both for ace and aro people. There are lots of different experiences in the community that need to be heard.

[furiousgoldfish]

Recognizing Abuse Masterlist

Signs that you’re living in abuse:

Behavioral patterns of living in abuse

Was I abused? Checklist

Not knowing you are a victim

Signs your family is abusive

Making excuses for your abusive parents

Experience of living in secrecy

What they taught you was abuse

Emotional experiences of living in abuse

Shame and guilt: how abused children feel

What makes parents abusers (actions)

Have I been manipulated into believing abuse was my fault? Checklist

Am I being held hostage by abusers? Checklist

You are not allowed to mention the past

Why you still love abusive parents

Parental behaviour that isn’t normal

Shit parents aren’t supposed to say to you

Experience of “not belonging anywhere”

Red flags for abusive parents

Healthy vs Abusive Chores

Was my childhood abusive or just had some bad parts?

Rules always change (unpredictable environment is abusive)

Breakdown of abusive parent’s behaviour:

“This is my house” rule

Start living in the real life!

Why all the children aren’t abused equally in an abusive home

Common abuser hypocrisies

Do your parents want you to be happy or look happy?

Why do they try to convince you that you’re worthless

Why do they pretend you’re a burden? Controlling behaviour

Why your abusers are not good people

Abusive parents are keeping you in false hope they’ll change

Are your parents preventing you from succeeding?

Abusive parents pretending “it wasn’t that bad”

Double Bind (why every choice you make ends wrong)

Incorporating trauma in raising children

Abusers will not allow you to call them out on abuse

Signs your parents are narcissistic:

Stuff delusional narcissists say

Shit narcissistis parents say

Tactics of narcissistic abuse

Recognizing emotional immaturity of narcissistic parents

Examples of narcissistic behaviours

Being punished for growing up by narcissistic parents

What children of narcissists go thru

Signs you’ve been thru sexual abuse:

CSA (Childhood Sexual Abuse) Symptoms

Signs you might have endured CSA

Was I sexually abused by adults as a child? Checklist

Signs of abusive friendship/relationship:

How to tell if a friend is not a friend

Am I in an abusive relationship/friendship? Checklist

Manufacturing insecurities

Red flags for abusers

Have I been thru social abuse? Checklist

You can recognize abusers by how they make you feel

How abusive childhood teaches you to stay in abusive relationships

Recognizing abusive friendship

Signs you’re struggling with trauma

Trauma processing information

Experiences of traumatized children

Signs you’re recovering from long term abuse

Things abuse survivors think/say

Thoughts of victims of child abuse

Your brain on trauma

How long term childhood abuse develops into complex trauma (comic)

Ups and downs of trauma

[mosscoric]

Alternatives to QPP

Zucchini: colloquial term used to refer to a person's partner in a queerplatonic relationship.

Mallowfriend: alternative to qpp and zucchini. it's short for marshmallowfriend.

Aromate: aromantic equivalent to datemate.

Quasifriend: quasi- is sometimes used to replace the queer- in queerplatonic. the meaning of quasi- is "seemingly; apparently but not really" or "being partly or almost".

Squishfriend: a squish is the platonic equivalent to a crush.

Plushfriend: a plush is the queerplatonic equivalent to a crush.

Squashfriend: a squash is the less commonly used term for a queerplatonic crush.

QPF / QPfriend: replaces 'partner' with 'friend'.

Partner: a familiar choice that can be used for any type of partnership.

Companion: often used by those who are specifically in a companionate relationship.

PF: a specific term for those who are in a passionate friendship. also known as passfriend, pashfriend, or passionate friend.

Mellon: the elvish word for "friend".

[huffylemon]

[dickneto2-deactivated20210815]

Some minors on this site are acting like people in their twenties are like ancient

[dickneto2-deactivated20210815]

Sorry to tell you but twenties is young. Thirties is young. Some of y’all are just in this state of mind that your twenties are the end of your life and it might seem like that for some of you but that’s just society pressuring y’all to be #young and #beautiful forever when you’re. A teen

[dickneto2-deactivated20210815]

Pop culture has done irreparable damage to teens and young adults to the point where they’re using filters to make the natural creases in their skin invisible. Like… everyone has wrinkles. It’s not a sign of aging it’s a sign of being a HUMAN

[subject-a6-the-bookworm]

I'm just asking, do people in romantic relationships always mean the things they say? I genuinely mean this, when person A says to person B, "I've missed you". Sure, I get it, but to what extent?! My enbyfriend -before I came out- would text me that and I just sat there thinking, "If I'm being brutally honest, you haven't even crossed my mind..." and I felt so bad... it's incredible that people can feel like this, I admire it, but if you don't feel this don't be ashamed either, don't feel bad, be proud of yourself!

- a content with how I am aroace

[bellusvoid]

[hungwy]

once a week i say to myself el problema es el capitalismo because of that one pic

[trueblackstar]

[wannabehuntress]

Me: I love being aromantic being aro makes me better than everyone and it's the best and it's so much better and easier than being allo I couldn't imagine having a crush that would be so awful and annoying and-

Some alloromantic: I wish I was aromantic :(

Me: NO YOU DONT it sucks! Never say that! It's terrible you do NOT want to be aro shut up!!!

[solar-abyss]

There’s a difference between being proud of who you are and people wanting to be an oppressed sexuality. Your experience is valid and is shared with the rest of the aro community!! You’re doing great, no romo

[arodoodler]

I like to view asexuality and aromanticism as twins.

People often mistake one for the other. People think they’re the same. Though they may look similar both of them is a unique individual. 

They fight sometimes but in the end they do wish the best for each other.

[arodoodler]

Im going to temporarily revisit this post to perhaps clear some things up of my own views- AlloAro- close friends with just the Aro twin, (you should still respect the Ace twin of course.) AceAro- close friends with both twins. AlloAce- close friends with just the Ace twin, (you should still respect the Aro twin of course.) and then there are things like ‘demi-ace/aro’ - where your friendship is off and on, usually depending on what’s currently going on. Lithro&(is there a asexual equivalent?) - where your friendship goes away with certain conditions but fades back in. (I know there’s more but I can’t remember them all. If anyone thinks of more feel free to add and explain them.)