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@bioluminescentbladeschild
My ao3:
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Btw, all fics are currently only visible if youāre logged in, but feel free to request that I post any on tumblr if you prefer reading it here :)
I love Hadestown so much because in the original myth Eurydice very explicitly dies and thatās why sheās in the underworld. The musical takes a much more metaphorical approach. And what does the love of my life, Anais Mitchell, choose to use as an allegory for death?? Getting a shitty job. And thatās honestly so real of her
I just saw a video of someone saying something along the lines of ābeing without ADHD medication is like being without a wheelchair! If people were waiting this long for wheelchairs and having to crawl around their homes then something would be done immediately, so why canāt I get ADHD meds??ā
And just, can people stop assuming that wheelchair users get handed everything on a plate. Because we absolutely are not.
People wait months and years for wheelchairs ā yes, even non ambulatory people. Thatās months and years of suffering, of crawling or being confined to bed or stuck in unsuitable wheelchairs.
Yes, medication shortages are serious and need addressingā¦ but making comparisons to wheelchair users when not knowing a single thing about the processes of accessing a chair in various countries is not the way to go about it.
It's basically never a good idea to point to a group you're not part of or familiar with and say "Nobody would dare do this to THEM!"
Yes they would. Ableism and other types of bias are a hell of a drug. A small amount of public awareness of a problem being bad is not the same as the problem not existing anymore. Murder is illegal and it happens every day. There are SO many remaining societally acceptable bigotries.
And to anyone who likes this rhetorical trick: Try saying, "The same way it would be ridiculous and wrong to do [thing] to [group], it's ridiculous and wrong to do this to us." Build solidarity instead of competition.
Okay but people make the comparison because we get treated like drug addicts when we complain that we cannot access something that is as important to our functioning as a wheelchair would be to somebody with mobility issues. There is an enormous stigma placed on being dependent on a controlled substance for functioning and these medications are often made unavailable without warning because insurance companies decide they are "over-prescribed" and stop paying for their production for months at a time leading to shortages where people cannot refill medication that they need to live. Comparing them to mobility aids isn't an attempt to make competition, it is us trying to illustrate to the able population that this substance is as important and as morally neutral as a mobility aid. Because these substances get treated like a moral failing or we are seen as "lucky" for being able to "get drugs" by people who don't know the difference between getting high and getting well. And it has a major impact on people's lives, the instability of adderall availability is one of the reasons I had to leave my last job. I don't think it is a bad comparison to say that expecting me to go to work without adderall would be like asking a wheelchair user to go without a wheelchair; they wont DIE without it but life is painful and undignified and they cannot preform the tasks expected of them without it. But the same people who understand why it would be wrong to make a non-ambulatory person drag themselves along the ground think I need to toughen up and "face life sober" because my medication is presented as a moral issue and society sees me as lazy/an addict because deep down most people secretly don't believe in the reality of mental illness or disability and see anything that a "normal" person could abuse for a high as a privilege.
Wheelchairs arenāt seen as morally neutral and (especially ambulatory) wheelchair users are called lazy, told to try harder to push through without, and people accuse them of faking/being dramatic/using their mobility device as a ācrutchā (a loaded fucking statement in itself) all the time, hope this helps!! š„°š„°
But seriously, this whole post is about making assumptions about a community you donāt understand, insisting they donāt face the same stigma as poor you, and asserting that their needs are understood and get met WHEN THATāS DEMONSTRABLY NOT THE CASE
Thereās this whole brilliantly articulated post about why this sort of rhetoric is untrue and it harms another community and youāve gone and doubled down.
It even told you how you could get the same exact point across instead. But you ignored that so you could insist that no actually, you deserve to put this other group down because your suffering is so so special and the only way you can make that point is by emphasizing how nobody else would experience such poor treatment as you (the most stigmatized person in the world)
All you had to do was not claim that nobody would ever do this to wheelchair users when yes they fucking would. āThe same people who think I need to toughen upā think wheelchair users need to toughen up and stop being dependent on the chair too. The people who āsee anything a normal person could abuse as a privilegeā see a chair as something a ānormalā person could abuse to get special treatment or avoid having to walk if they wanted to be lazy. Thereās stigma around beginning to use mobility aids you need because itās āgiving upā (a moral failing), because āwhy does everyone suddenly have chronic illness/need mobility aidsā (which disregarding the usual, they were hidden away/died before, might have something to do with the mass disabling event that started a few years ago and is still happening. But say that and you literally start getting death threats from the covid deniers, A WHOLE VERY PROMINENT TYPE OF PERSON WHO DENIES OUR EXPERIENCE AND OPENLY CLAIMS PHYSICALLY DISABLED PEOPLE ARE WEAK AND DESERVE TO DIE). People who consume this rhetoric without realizing it think all the ānewerā cardiac/mobility/neurological/respiratory issues are over diagnosed. They think weāre looking for the easy way out, we donāt really need mobility aids/treatment, weāre letting ourselves depend upon these devicesļæ¼. Thatās stigma baby. Our shitās made unavailable too (sometimes we actually do die because of it). Weāre seen as āluckyā to get the privilege of a better parking spot, designated spots on the bus, etc. What, you thought you were the only one getting these sorts of comments??
Even PHYSICALLY DISABLED people are literally treated as drug seeking (sometimes having it directly noted in their charts) when they present at the hospital with a VISIBLE ailment and have the audacity to ask for treatment. This is not exclusive to pain meds. This includes asking for saline. These are literally life or death scenarios and they still arenāt taken seriously. This isnāt even getting into how invisible illnesses are treated. Your experiences arenāt unique, youāre not suffering in some unheard of way, and you arenāt more misunderstood. But what you are doing is actively dismissing the lived experiences of physically disabled people and contributing to making us more misunderstood
(and for the record, I have ADHD and I use a wheelchair/have chronic illness. The stigma is nowhere near comparable, but not in the direction youāre asserting. Stop insisting on your right to speak on an issue you know nothing about. I love neurodivergent spaces and acceptance movements, but not when they step on physically disabled people to get there, which yāall seem to love doing)
āBut I didnāt consent to see kinkā yes you did by coming to pride,
a place you know and have repeatedly said you know kink is at, a place built by kinky people, the mother of pride Brenda Howard was a queer kinky polyamorous sex positive anti war bisexual Jew and to try and remove its history or sanitise it is is spitting on her grave, you are consenting by choosing to go there
Paraphilia - Wikipedia
There are 2 valid foot fetishist and they are the 1920s lesbians on the Wikipedia page for Paraphilia
I went to pride at 11. I wasnāt even out yet, but I definitely did feel a distinct kinship with the people there. I saw what I know now in hindsight was kink attire. I wonāt lie, I was a very naive 11 yo. I had never so much as stumbled upon porn and my knowledge of sex was limited to what they taught me about puberty in 5th grade (and this is America, they separated the boys and girls, so I only knew about one side of the equation). I loved the cool costumes some people were wearing and I didnāt even think to sexualize nudity yet. My innocence was left perfectly intact and I got the opportunity to meet some people from my community. They were all super nice to me, and I left with the feeling that if I grew up to be like them there would be an accepting place waiting for me.
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I went to pride again at 16. This time I understood what kink was. Some of it did make me uncomfortable, so I simply looked the other way instead of trying to police people IN THEIR OWN SPACE. I loved it and had a great time overall. And no, seeing leather/sexy drag/little clothing/etc did not scar me for life I was FINE. I knew I was queer this time, but I wasnāt quite there yet myself. I felt so brave wearing a single rainbow bracelet (and that was okay too; people accepted my timidness, they were encouraging, they complemented my tiny little bracelet, and they gave me space when I did look overwhelmed/uncomfortable). I left knowing that no matter how I chose to express myself one day I would have an accepting place to do so.
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I went to pride again at 19. There were cops everywhere. I couldnāt go to most of the events because they were age restricted to 21+. Even still, I could tell the people there were not as carefree and open as they were in the past. Both times before, I was able to make a choice for myself on how to engage based on my own comfort level. I was barely even a child this time, but there was no place for me. That choice had been taken away. The adults were having a bad time because they couldnāt be themselves, and the kids were having a bad time because a bunch of conservative adults had made the choice for us that we couldnāt handle it and therefore we werenāt allowed. I knew I could handle it because I had done so before. And by this point in my life I was visibly, undeniably queer. I felt way safer with the pups and the sexy drag queens, the harness-and-nothing-else-clad leather daddies and the shirtless butches than I felt around the pearl-clutching school board members and church goers who screamed to protect the children. I was still in the school system they were purging of books, but I was also a legal adult and I knew damn well that they meant to protect the āchildrenā from me. I had seen the rise of homophobia and the way people were governed by disgust in school, politics, and online, but I didnāt realize that theyād sunk in so deep that it would actually change pride.
I left feeling scared that this place I grew up thinking would always be there to accept me didnāt exist anymore
"adult who logs on and works themself into a furor over teenagers not having perfectly articulated opinions and thoughts on the world" is quickly becoming my least favorite genre of Poster Du Jour
"this teenager is overly skittish and prudish about alcohol and drugs" i was like that as a teenager because i was a sheltered child and not every person in the world enjoys substance use or has the proclivity for it and that's fine
"this teenager has conservative ideas about sex" theyre literally at a point in their life where they're only beginning to grapple with sexuality, that's their business and barring some far flung outliers it's probably extremely weird that you care about what a kid you dont know thinks about sex
"this kid's opinion about this complex issue is ill-informed and not as articulate as it could be" that is normal because they are a child
"this teen online doesnt understand queer history" maybe you should gently guide them as a peer in your vulnerable community instead of trying to dunk on them for your followers
"this kid on the internet is a loser because [x]" if youre an adult and say stuff like this i have to assume youre projecting bc you were bullied in tenth grade
This post fundamentally misunderstands the criticisms leveled at Puriteens et al, by grouping wildly different criticisms together as equal.
I assure you:
Most of us have no quarrel with kids who are overly skittish and prudish about alcohol and drugs - we care if they launch harassment campaigns against people who want to talk online about alcohol and drugs.
Most of us have no quarrel with kids who have conservative ideas about sex - we care if they launch harassment campaigns against people who want to talk online about sex.
Most of us have no quarrel with kids who have ill-informed opinions. Many of us are actively seeking to educate and better inform those kids. Rebuttals and corrections are a part of speaking in a public forum.
Most of us have no quarrel with kids who don't understand queer history - we care if they launch harassment campaigns against people who do not pander to the fictional history that these kids have somehow come to believe. Many of us despair that kids don't understand queer history; that's a different thing than criticism/dunking.
There's a pervasive attitude I've noticed in online spaces in the last few years (this isn't a teen thing, it's a zeitgeist thing) that any rebuttal, correction, or simply definition of terms is taken as an act of aggression. I do honestly wonder if this is at all related to the move from forum culture (Blogs, LJ, messageboards) to modern social media 'like' culture. I see parallels to new users of tumblr not reblogging and replying, instead keeping discussion in the notes or in the tags - the idea that it's rude to join a thread.
No bc this is exactly it. If anyone of any age wants to be misinformed or fearfully avoidant of literally anything thatās their business.
Itās once they start barging into other peopleās lives to police their behavior that itās an issue. And weāve seen that āpuriteensā have a real cultural impact in the real world. The official law enforcement, the real actual irl POLICE š·šhave literally been called into schools to confiscate lgbt books. Why?? Bc someone felt so squeamish about queer existence, about the risk of the queer experience not being hidden away in secret, that they CALLED THE FUCKING COPS!!! And the cops responded by actually searching the library for this literary contraband!!
Nobody was forcing anyone to read this book. It was just available for the kids who did want it. But thatās the thing with these purity culture enforcing, conservative youth. They arenāt willing to just not engage with something themself. They have to ensure nobody else can have it either. And the real world impact is that their behavior online is responsible for the cultural push to legislate minorities out of existence.
So yeah, just like teens advocating to stop climate change, make schools safer, etc make a real difference, so do teens advocating for actual genuine facist censorship. People of all demographics SHOULD be fighting that. Bigotry is bigotry, regardless of the perpetratorās age. And teens/young adults, like everyone else, do have the potential to grow and change, we can all acknowledge that. Their behavior may very well be borne of youthful naivety and the fear of something they donāt yet understand. Thatās all fine for their personal journey to unlearn purity culture, but in the meantime itās not unreasonable for everyone else to fight the disenfranchisement thatās resulting in literal attempts at genocide that these very vocally ignorant young people are complicit in.
Teens speaking up have power, for good or evil. And letās be so so real, the rhetoric criminalizing drugs and demonizing addiction is very obviously rooted in racism and ableism. You have to do very very minimal research for that to be abundantly and undeniably clear, and todayās online youth have all the information they could possibly need available at their fingertips. Weāre under no obligation to just accept willful ignorance. āConservative ideas about sexā is a thinly veiled way of saying anti queer with a pinch of misogyny and christofacism. Again, this isnāt a secret. If youāre going to be loudly and openly wrong you canāt be upset when someone corrects you. Even some of these queer teens insisting that kink at pride is pedophilic because minors may be present are causing measurable harm to real peopleās lives. Thatās a serious fucking allegation, and it can both ruin the life of the accused and minimize the term when applied to real survivors, all because this teen who doesnāt understand queer history decided to cast themselves as a voice of authority in the queer community?? Yeah, we donāt have to and we absolutely shouldnāt accept that. That behavior DOES warrant being called out or confronted.
Yes, teens should have the chance to unlearn the oppressive ideas theyāve been groomed into believing since birth. But the reality is if youāre going to inflict your hatred on the public, you should expect the public to respond. The below pictures are kids too. But theyāre being loudly hateful and ignorant in a public forum. Should the desegregation activists have just let them continue the violence and the hateful rhetoric?? Should people excuse their bigoted behavior because ātheyāre just kidsā and any effort to confront them is sO mEaN š¢
Should trans people be forced to just accept this behavior on the chance that the person grew up sheltered and doesnāt know any better?? Does their youthfulness mitigate the damage done in any meaningful way?? Why shouldnāt we address these things??
And it starts on twitter (stfu Elon), and tiktok, and in podcasts. Those are the things influencing peopleās opinions. And people who know better should absolutely chime in over misinformation or hatefulness. Online interactions can literally lead to radicalization and deadly real world violence. And yes, these are the extreme examples, but itās the vast amount of hateful misinformation available that enables situations like these. You donāt have to be aggressive about it, but pointing out that someone is sharing harmful rhetoric with a wide audience is only way to combat this stuff. Teens arenāt babies, and theyāre capable of causing serious harm. We can acknowledge that their brain isnāt done cooking yet while also being proactive about the very real and severe consequences of allowing teens to spread christofacist ideas unchallenged (which is what all the purity culture propaganda ultimately is)
Final word of advice for the well intentioned internet user: If you arenāt informed on something, you seriously donāt need to talk about it. Just be quiet and listen to and learn from the people who do know. If someone tells you that something you said is harmful, take a step back, breathe, and reflect on it in private. You donāt need to grapple with these difficult issues with the entire world watching and judging
Sources on police searching classrooms for lgbt books:
A police officer entered a middle school classroom to search for an "inappropriate" book. And no, it wasn't 1984.
Police received a complaint over the book, so an officer went to hunt it down.
my dad sent me to conversion therapy as a teen and some of the things the christian ātherapistā said to me there were indistinguishable from what people on here say surrounding the egg discourse. men can be feminine, men can wear dresses sometimes, men can be sensitive, men can use makeup, men can like traditionally feminine things, but they must remain men. remaining a man is more important than anything else. your maleness is immutable and will follow you everywhere you go, so stay in your assigned seat and learn to be okay with it. to say what everyone else has said, ask yourself why youāre so invested in keeping people this way. why do you employ the same tactics as a conversion therapist? what do you stand to gain by insisting there mustnāt be any more trannies in the world?
I think OP's point here is pretty heavily undercut by her proceeding to reply to someone laying out why egg jokes directed at him make him uncomfortable by making fun of him. it makes it seem like the problem isn't people being uncomfortable with egg jokes and expressing that in a transphobic way, but merely being uncomfortable with them at all!
and I think in general this is a weakness of this sort of "discourse by vagueposting"; you can't actually judge what someone says, only the summary provided by someome who often takes the least charitable reads possible. and I've done this of course but I try not to make those posts rebloggable
"but machine-saint, the person talking about his bullying isn't saying what the jokes are either!" and this is true! but bugreblobblog focuses on how the jokes make him feel, and explicitly says he doesn't think they're trying to belittle his identity, whereas OP is imparting transphobic intent
you hit the nail on head i think. the problem with egg jokes isn't that theyre somehow coercing GNC men into transitioning, it's that publicly speculating about the personal lives of strangers is weird and rude.
My rule of thumb is call people what they asked to be called, especially when they can hear you.
Say whatever you want about how dumb you/your friends were to have not realized you own identities despite mounting evidence, but:
Speculating about random peopleās gender/sexuality/identity is a dick move (especially if it involves pressuring them to identify a certain way or invalidating their current identity)
Everyone deserves to figure themselves out and come out (or not) in their own time
Your right to make silly jokes will never supersede anyone elseās right to have their identity respected
You canāt disagree with someoneās own identity just because their expression doesnāt align with how you interpret that label
The hardest, but most important, part of my transition has been untangling what my personal dysphoria is, and what is more a result of cissexism.
What I mean by this is that I learned that I am not dysphoric about certain aspects of myself, my body, and my life, but my discomfort in these aspects was influenced by the cissexist culture I live in which told me I couldn't exist as myself.
It's definitely a slow process, but I have found that it helps me self-actualize and actually see myself instead of what others demand of me.
I think many trans people might be weary of this (understandably) because transphobes appropriate this line of thinking with the hope to "cure" us of our transness. They think that, by forcing us to accept the things that they want in order to force us to be cis, they can be rid of us.
However, this fundamentally misunderstands the trans condition.
I wrote this original post because I have thick thighs that used to make me dysphoric because the eurocentric standard is for men to simultaneously be muscular and built like a brick house whilst also being trim and slight. The other men in my family - cis men! - have the same build as me, even now as my testosterone levels are on par (or higher) than theirs. It is in our genetic sequence to have thighs that are not deemed "masculine," literally.
However, since accepting that my male body is completely standard in my family and learning to accept this, it still didn't make me cis. I'm still male, I am still a man. Nothing has changed, and in fact, it's made me feel even more "like a man" because now I can foster my masculinity in healthier ways than hating my body. Transphobes will never understand this so long as they think they can "cure" us.
To trans people reading this: exploring your dysphoria won't make you cis, but it can make your life a whole lot easier. You might still be dysphoric, and that's okay. The goal isn't to cure yourself of your transness - that is an unfair and likely impossible task. This piece of advice exists solely for you to consider. You might find that your dysphoria might be triggered because, while you have a completely normal body, it might not fit into the extremely narrow confines of cissexism (which even cis people (even of your gender) might not fit into, because it is narrow and unrealistic to a lot of people's experiences). You aren't required to do this, and you know your dysphoria better than anybody else will. You deserve to make the choice on how you address it without judgement or people expecting you to be "normal."
Iām always a little terrified to talk about my personal experience with gender for fear that the transphobes will take it and run with it as an example of how someone can āoutgrowā being trans
I certainly donāt consider myself to be cis, but Iām not sure Iād necessarily say Iām trans either. More likely somewhere along the nb spectrum, but I have trouble pinpointing exactly where or finding a perfect label for it
Iām afab. When I was a toddler, my younger brother was born, which was when I learned about the anatomical differences between boys and girls. Friends, I, aged three (3) was seething with jealousy over this literal infantās genitals. I didnāt know why, I just knew I really really wanted to look like that and it felt so unfair that he got to have a penis and I didnāt. I never told anyone, but that feeling persisted throughout my entire childhood. Iād tape any phallic looking objects I could find to my pelvis, Iād daydream about a fairy godmother turning me into a boy or freaky Friday style switching bodies with any of the boys I knew. This was early childhood, before sexuality was something I was even aware of and before I really understood what misogyny was or the societal advantages these boys had over me. I was just envious the appearance of their physical form, completely oblivious to how the organs even worked or what their function was. And I didnāt dislike being a girl. I embraced my femininity. I did ballet, I liked princesses and dolls and makeup. I wore dresses and skirts, bows and glitter and frills and anything and everything pink. I liked āboyā toys and clothes too. I had collections of trucks and dinosaurs and those monster truck dino heads on all terrain wheels. I could build hot wheels tracks and shoot nerf guns with the best of them. But I didnāt want to be a boy. I played with my brothers and ātomboyā friends, but I was perfectly content with my girly name and pronouns. I had all the girl power shirts and pencil cases and thought nothing of it. I didnāt even dislike my own body per say, I just liked what the boys had going on better.
That all changed with puberty. I was horrified when I saw those images of female development. I wanted nothing to do with it. As soon as the first signs started showing up, my self loathing began. Suddenly all I wore were loose clothes from the boys section. I started wearing boxers because little girlsā underwear was too childish, but I couldnāt stomach the idea of going into the teen girlsā underwear stores. I started hanging out with only boys. Everyone, myself included, thought I was crazily attracted to them. I was obsessed with the way their bodies were responding to puberty. I stared at them and followed them everywhere. I copied their every move, played the same games, watched the same shows and sports, wore the same clothes. I knew I wanted to be them and I was so so jealous of the fact that I was growing up to be hideous with stupid boobs and hips and they were getting muscles and facial hair and were so beautiful in comparison. But compulsive heterosexuality combined with the prevalence of teen girls hating their bodies made it seem normal. Misogyny had become incredibly prevalent in my life, so I thought I was just physically attracted to them and the feeling of envy was derived from the societal privileges they had over me. Those around me have remarked upon that period of my life as being my āpick meā phase.
As I got deeper into adolescence, I learned about the existence of trans people. Iād somehow never realized before then that changing your gender was even an option. And it was a tempting oneā¦ my daydreams became focused on the idea that if I could just push through to adulthood, Iād start T and get all the surgeries, undo all the damage puberty had done to my body. I kept lists of names I could go by instead in my diary. I couldnāt bear the idea of growing up to be a woman, but the idea that maybe I didnāt have to gave me hope. I used every ill advised binding strategy in the book and cut my hair short. A stranger āmisgenderingā me would fuel my confidence for months after the fact.
Then, when the pandemic hit, everyoneās idea of gender shifted. Suddenly, defying gender roles seemed so mainstream. So I started experimenting with painting my nails, wearing makeup, wearing girlsā clothes for the first time since I was 11. And I didnāt mind it. Iād even go as far as to say I liked it. Now that those things didnāt mean, under no uncertain terms, association with womanhood, I found I actually didnāt hate them. As people started erasing the idea that names and things were inextricably tied to gender, I found I didnāt mind my feminine name so much anymore. I could suddenly appreciate the fact that it connected me with my familyās culture rather than feeling restrained by its gendered connotations.
Now, I look more like a cis woman than I ever have before. I technically use any pronouns. The realistic result is that everyone uses she/her because I present female. It doesnāt necessarily offend me. But every once in a while when someone doesnāt it still gives me that spike of euphoria. I havenāt taken any hormones or undergone any procedures. Mainly because Iāve realized how logistically complicated it is and I canāt take that on right now. If I could magically move into a manās body, I would in an instant with zero hesitation. But I hate my own body less than I did when I was younger. I know how to dress to de-emphasize the feminine proportions. I donāt mind dresses, so long as they arenāt the mermaid style ones that really draw attention to curves. I love how I look in the poofy dresses that completely hide your figure. And while I know from an outside perspective those fluffy dresses make me look way more girly than jeans and a tee, I personally feel like my gender, whatever it is, is perfectly affirmed by them.
From the outside, it looks like I outgrew my tomboy tendencies, my internalized misogyny, and my adolescent awkwardness.
Internally, I feel more satisfied in my nonconforming relationship with gender than I have since childhood. Iāve really unpacked whether it was internalized misogyny at play, or some effort to dodge the brunt of facing the hardships of being a woman in this world. And while Iāve concluded that itās impossible to completely remove those factors, that was never the driving force in my discomfort. Iām not even attracted to men at all, so I wasnāt trying to get their attention by copying them. I was using them as a guide to bring out my own masculinity. If I had endless resources there are things about my body that I would change, but Iām no longer completely unable to conceive of a future in which they arenāt changeable. I think Iād identify as somewhat nonbinary even if I could change everything. I donāt exactly want to be a man. But Iām able to look like a woman externally, be perceived as a woman by most people, and yet for the first time in my life Iām comfortable enough in myself to know that those things donāt have to make me a woman.
Anyway, I havenāt been ācured.ā Iām not a woman. I used to think of myself as a girl and now I donāt, so Iām actually more gnc in that sense. Iām able to accept that some traits of mine arenāt inherently tied to my sex, nor do they have to be. I rejected them because even though we live in such a strictly gender segregated culture, my clothes and hobbies donāt have shit to do with my personal idea of what my gender means to me. And thatās what really matters, not my great aunt Carolineās insistence that only girls can like pink so anyone who likes pink must be a girl. Might transphobes still use my journey as their fodder for further hatred and discrimination? Maybe. But Iām still not cis. And Iām still a trans ally through and through. Any attempt to use this story as āproofā that gender nonconformity is just a phase is actually just proof that those people didnāt actually understand me or my story at all.
Anyway, thanks to all the people who put in the work deconstructing our societyās very narrowed ideas of what gender means. Thanks to everyone who normalized neutral pronouns and the idea of existence outside the gender binary. I never couldāve existed this comfortably within myself in 2015 or 2016. And as our ideas of gender become more flexible, I hope more people can find their self actualizing interpretation of who they are, whether thatās done externally with gender affirming treatment or internally via rejection of the mortal flesh
āyou donāt like the proliferation of terms like Unalive outside of TikTok because you realize that youāre aging out of youth culture and it makes you uncomfortable!ā
no I donāt like it because thereās something INCREDIBLY dystopian about being forced to soften terms for basic parts of the human experience like death and sex (and even more so terms for oppressed minorities- call me aĀ āle-dollar sign-bianā and I will bite you) purely because advertisers and corporations demand it
As someone who is literally in the exact generation responsible for these terms, completely irrevocably entrenched in youth culture, and not at risk of aging out for at least another decade if not longer:
I agree wholeheartedly
Itās not about hating the current trends because being a dissenter is and always has been a trend in and of itself, itās that this particular trend has horrifying implications about how corporations are able to determine whatās socially acceptable in every single corner of society. As these ideas become more widespread, their power becomes increasingly unchecked. Weāre all non consensually made into representatives of their business model, and our own inherent humanity is overwhelmed by our place as advertisers and consumers. Theyāve already begun sanitizing us out of our true existence, and they openly plan on taking it further. This is clearly being done in conjunction with the more overt right wing censorship efforts (because guess whoās funding those right wing politiciansā¦ guess which side of the political spectrum supports legislation which enables the continued existence of these mega corporationsā¦ their symbiotic relationship is no secret)
If youāre not alarmed by seemingly neutral/progressive people falling into this trap, you should be. If you are alarmed by the way a huge chunk of the population is unintentionally going right along with the efforts to erase significant pieces of the range of human experience, you should be MORE alarmed. Itās seriously fucking alarming.
And acting like this is about āthe last generation always judges youth cultureā is either deliberately minimizing the rightful criticism of a horrifying trend or itās unconsciously supporting the suppression of this alleged āimpurityā
This isnāt about fashion or music or preferred entertainment. THOSE are harmless aspects of youth culture that anyone may find cringe, but at the end of the day are part of the inevitable change that comes with a new generation coming of age and taking their place as contributors to our societal consciousness. Those with their influence being threatened will bristle, but it will not change the passage of time and the new trends will continue to phase in and out despite their protests. The even more mature will roll their eyes at the fruitless screaming, but they have no more ability to stop the middle generationās cacophonous opposition than the middle generation has to stop the youngestās grasp on pop culture.
That is an inevitable cycle, not deliberately manufactured brainwashing of people of ALL ages (because itās not just kids talking about grape, pdf files, seggs, or unaliving, or reducing crucial parts of their own identities down to le$bian, accountants, and camping trips) to act against their own interests in order to appease an āalgorithmā that has been personified and elevated in status to the point of deification. This āalgorithmā has become the panopticon guard even in real life where we know it has no reach because weāve submitted ourselves to internal surveillance. Weāre unthinkingly doing the heavy lifting for them, and itās entirely worth examining why and whether awareness can help to reverse it. We KNOW what the feeling of being constantly surveilled does to people. We know the shame it brings. As a society, weāre at a crossroads on whether weāre willing to accept those consequences to the individual for the sake of moral purity 2.0 and āprotecting the childrenā
As religion is gaining more and more scrutiny, itās effectiveness in controlling the population on behalf of those who wish for anyone they donāt like to quietly go into hiding is under threat. This new āalgorithm godā that sees everything youāre doing and will smite you from public existence if it catches you engaging with forbidden topics is the same exact psychological phenomenon updated to suit modern technology and cultural norms.
The only ammunition we have to fight back with is making that connection. Religious guilt and control are under fire for a reason. People donāt want some āgodā representing the interests of whoeverās translating their divine messages to control who they can and canāt be. They donāt want to ignore major parts of their experience because some power decided it was too ugly to be seen. They may not yet have realized that being forced to abide by specific terms of self censorship in order to be allowed in the public forum is fundamentally the same thing as making a church a private place with the authority to put specific rules in place (but simultaneously establishing it as the center of all public life, so refusing to accept those limitations to gain access is akin to banishing oneself from society). Itās the exact same trick thatās worked to control what parts of themselves people were allowed to show for all of human history. Itās the same tactic thatās been used to maliciously segregate, hide, or kill off anyone deemed socially unacceptable without public uproar time and time again. We can hardly blame yet another generation for succumbing to the method that has been proven over and over to be majorly successful in turning the public against āundesirablesā (including those āundesirablesā themselves). That said, knowing that the masses have expressed that they donāt want to live that way, opening their eyes to this connection is a potentially significant step in the effort to halt our societyās decent into another (physical or cultural) genocide fueled by moral panic
So yeah, āalgospeakā is not annoying slang that makes people feel out of touch. Suggesting as much is either naive or deliberately misleading. We NEED to think about the implications of where public perception is headed, we need to compare and contrast with the discriminatory atrocities of the past, and we need to be proactive in addressing it
Every now and then I see hashtag discourse about supporting kids who are black sheep in their communities. Occasionally, these posts will also mention atheist kids, and OP will get dragged across the coals because atheists are not an oppressed group.
Which is easy to say if you donāt live in a fundamentalist community or come from a religious family. Not all atheists or agnostics are Richard Dawkins, āeuphoricā, and militantly hostile towards other peopleās religious beliefs. Iām originally from a small, rural town in Mike Penceās home state, where local churches often exercise a cultish level of influence over the community. I was fortunate enough to grow up in a left-leaning household with agnostic parents who embraced multiculturalism, so I only had to worry about religious abuse outside of the home. Almost all the bullying I experienced at school was because everyone knew I didnāt go to churchā¦ kids mocked me, called me names, and kicked me around a bit, while public school teachers told me I was going to Hell. On my first day of kindergarten, my teacher had us raise our hands if we went to church. As the only child who didnāt raise his hand, she interrogated me and then informed me that I needed to find Jesus. I had classmates tell me that they werenāt allowed to be friends with me because I wasnāt Christian and their parents were afraid Iād infect them with my sinfulness.
So, hereās to anyone who grew up in suffocating religious environments, at home or in your larger community. Spiritual abuse is real, regardless of your background, and if your beliefs, behaviors, or identity have made you a target of it, Iām sorry. Just try not to let your experiences poison your tolerance of the healthy religious beliefs of others.
As an atheist from a rural Bible Belt community, I can definitely attest to this sort of behavior. Best of luck to anyone going through this - you can do it and you CAN get out of there.
Not to take away from the gravity of your situations bc theyāre obviously more severe, but honestly just being an atheist anywhere in the US at least (I donāt wanna say anywhere else bc I donāt live there and donāt know, but Iām sure the US isnāt alone) you literally are treated worse than religious people. People talk about their gods and churches and mission trips all day long and thatās normal, but if you dare even mention something like that you donāt go to church or donāt celebrate a Christian holiday even in a way completely nonjudgmental of people who do participate in those things, people act like you kicked their puppy and murdered their child.
Laws are made with Christian principles in mind, even if that means being actively discriminatory toward queer people. All the time queer people are told about how weāre going to go to hell and our existence is regulated according to a belief system we donāt even share (and are guaranteed the right to not share from a legal standpoint, but letās be real, not a practical one)
It affects our education, because the church and state arenāt actually separated. We donāt get to learn about our own bodies, certain fields of scientific study, history that doesnāt fit the approved narrative, about any other religious beliefs. Our reading materials are limited accordingly. We have to chant under god on a daily basis and we can and do get punished for asserting our right to not partake.
Standards of public decency and etiquette revolve around Christian beliefs. Itās considered socially acceptable for people to berate others on the streets, threatening them with hell if they fit into any of the following criteria for sinners. People are harassed outside hospitals and clinics for daring to try to access birth control.
But wear an atheist t shirt out, and everyone thinks youāre an asshole and you ought to respect othersā beliefs. And a leather harnessā¦ āopposite genderedā apparelā¦ despite being literally just clothing that affects nobody else, those are grounds for public shaming, violence, being fired from your job, or accused of committing a sexual offense (and donāt even get me started on how adults are restricted on the grounds that a child may somehow be exposed despite not being involved at all, and yet even with the hundreds of thousands of kids being actually raped/assaulted/groomed/abused by church officials, thereās no effort to put up any safeguards there). Purity culture seeps into every aspect of our lives, sex negativity is rampant despite its measurable harmful impact on health
It affects the path youāre expected to take in life. And deviation from that path is harshly condemned. Survival resources are provided in a very conditional manner. The churches bleed communities dry and then expect to be praised as saints for giving a slice of bread and cup of soup to the āneedyā just as long as they come in the church to get it, dress and act according to church expectations for the occasion, pose for a picture, bow down and say thank you, and endure the condescending judgment from the congregation. And theyāll argue that some people arenāt deserving of government resources for the crime of not adhering to their ethical guidelines. The people pay taxes, the churches donāt, and yet the churches endlessly lobby against government aid to keep a monopoly on charity, forcing people to accept their terms in exchange for the privilege of survival
Laws cater to them. ļæ¼You want a political position, youād better be prepared to cater to Christian demands and swear on a bible. Our medical options are determined by Christian demands. Thereās active efforts to censor the internet to appease religious people. Work, school, events, and public life revolve around a Christian calendar
Itās considered totally reasonable for someone to force themselves upon you with prayers, but rude to assert boundaries and say you decline to participate. Itās impossible to realistically avoid participating in Christianity because itās so deeply ingrained in every aspect of our lives. And the religion is free to reject us for any reason at all, yet no reason is ever good enough for us to reject the church
Since yāall love saying āhate the sin, love the sinnerā so much, lemme present you with this: I will respect individuals so long as theyāre respectful in return. But I have every right and reason to hate the religious beliefs, establishment, and cultural impact
as someone who grew up queer and agnostic/atheist in the South, all of this rings horriffically true. It always made me so uncomfortable to have to go to church with my friends if I stayed over on a Saturday night, or to be expected to participate in prayer at mealtimes, or to say the pledge every morning and sing songs about god in choir at school. But if I said anything, I would be targeted and harrassed about my faith, or rather lack thereof.
People have the right to their beliefs, and if I donāt believe in anything, that should be respected. Fuck everyone who has ever pressured me or anyone else into participating in religious things we felt uncomfortable with or simply did not want to do. Fuck you.
I'm starting to find evidence on twitter of antis encouraging each other to shun friends and family for not being one of them and I am deeply concerned. This is some cult shit.
"should I shun my friend for being proship even though they're my only irl friend?"
"Should I shun my mother for being proship?"
The answer to both of these is GET HELP. You are being brainwashed into thinking that your friends and family are dangerous when you know that they wouldn't hurt anyone. See a therapist, take some time off the internet, reevaluate your situation. Fiction does not take precedence over your loved ones.
I'm tagging this with "antis please interact" because I think they need to see this too, and hopefully it helps someone. Your loved ones are not dangerous because of their taste in fiction.
It's really disturbing how we are watching a really unhealthy, purity obsessed minority become way, way too vocal. Are they becoming a majority among young fans, or are they just drowning out the other opinions?
Do these CHILDREN realize they are parroting the conservative "think of the children" dog whistle? Do they not realize that the same irrational fear of fiction negatively affecting reality is the same logic these book banning bigoted assholes are using to justify pulling books with LGBTQ characters? Because they are scared their straight child will become gay from reading a book! Because we all know THAT'S how that works, right?!
If reading books with queer characters doesn't make you gay, why the fuck would reading a fanfic with an underage character make you a pedophile? Did watching Game of Thrones make everyone suddenly cool with incest? No! Nothing changed!
Maybe these kids are confusing the concept of Representation Matters, where telling minority focused stories can be beneficial for that minority. Except they can't tell the difference between Watsonian and Doylelist analysis of a story. They can't differentiate between what the author is saying, what the setting is saying, and what a character is saying. So they think any mention of these "bad" things is bad because clearly it is condoning the behavior! Because video games DEFINITELY made me think murder is okay in real life, so I will definitely start grooming children because I read a teacher/student high school AU!
ITS' THE SAME FAULTY LOGIC!!
Two things:
1) I have unfortunately seen so many creepy controlling people who tell kids or people young enough to be their kids that they cannot trust their parents (often true but not always necessarily so either) and so they should confide in and trust a different parent figure - and then wiggle their way into being that parent figure. Isolation is the first thing an abuser or a groomer will do. And even if your parents are abusive I would suggest not trusting any random adult till you know about them and most definitely not having Only One Single Adult that you rely on and get all your views from. If you find yourself to be getting closer to one person while getting isolated from all other people in your life, that is a red flag, so be on a look-out for that.
2) some absolute dumbasses in the notes are arguing that violent murdery video games not making people violent murders is different from non con/incest in fiction which they believe will make perverts act on those instinct by making them even more perverted - a view that takes paraphilias to be something that everyone absolutely definitely acts on and by extension seems to suggest either complete isolation or eradication neither of which are viable options in society and dismissing the far better idea of people finding an outlet in fiction vs with actual people as being 'just as bad'. People are also seeing "defending pedo fanart" as being 1. Not worth it and 2. Suspicious and morally (hate that word) wrong. At this time may i remind everyone who is gonna read this post and think themself too good or too adult for "silly shipping discourse" to remember the adage of "defend the acceptable targets" because y'all know censorship will come for us all and especially purity culture like this will first and foremost target minorities. I'm sure it feels silly to defend fanart or self insert fics or furries or monster-fuckers or whatever, but it's about the principle of the thing. It won't be as silly when this ever-growing cult takes over artistic representations completely
No bc thatās the thing, accusations of pedophilia have already been so obviously weaponized by conservatives to attack trans and queer people for just existing. And these people are going to act like labeling something that grosses you out as equal to actual irl csa isnāt actively contributing to that effort.
Newsflash!! Conservatives think lgbt people are gross, morally depraved, perverted, all those same things you feel about whatever group youāve decided is not okay. Theyāre using this label that everyone agrees is bad to get everyone else to agree with them.
Falsely accusing innocent people of csa because they like game of thrones or young looking anime characters or any other media is that exact same moral panic that ājust seeing that yucky stuff will corrupt your mindā And itās enabling the concept of pedophilia to become an even more widespread dog whistle.
Itās watering down the severity of ACTUAL csa because now pedo has come to mean anyone you donāt like and itās allowing that label to be weaponized in order to socially shun and slander vulnerable populations
Be for real, you donāt care about child victims any more than conservative purists do, you just want to be able to morally justify harassing people for posting art or writing that you donāt like. Get over it, youāre the one doing real world harm
Donāt like, donāt fucking read, but donāt you dare go throwing out serious accusations to feel better about yourself over literal shipping discourse and then justify it w/ legality as drag is being actively criminalized on those same grounds of āitāll allow these nasty degenerates to groom your kids (because why are they into dressing/acting like that if not to trick people into trusting them so they can take advantage of a āsafe space made for abusersā -actual thing someone said about online pro ship communities) and just seeing people not being publicly crucified for drag/queerness/whatever Iām squicked out by will turn the children into perverts because they might think itās okayā
Hi! This tweet has been purposely taken out of context because people never include the rest of the thread. Iām not sure if you did so purposely or not, but please let me include the rest of the thread for you and explain.
Before I share screenshots of the rest of my tweets, first Iāll explain.
tl;dr: I was raised Catholic, taught that homosexuality was a sin. When I got into college, I joined tumblr and learned more about different sexualities and the lgbt+ community and started shifting my views a bit, i.e. I still believed it was still a sin but started to support lgbt+ people having the right to get married. Soon after, I started watching anime. I got into Free! and the fandom made the cutest art and fics and headcanons of all the m/m ships in the show. That made me start realizing thatĀ āthese ships are so sweet and loving and normal, why is this wrong or sinful?ā It made me seeing things differently. I stopped thinking that being gay was a sin, and after a few years of trying to undo internalized homophobia, I realized that Iām bi.
Iām sorry if I didnāt realize my sexuality in a way that was good or pure enough for the rest of you. Yes it took an anime and m/m fanart to make me realize that being gay was okay, Iām not ashamed to admit that. I live in Texas, I didnāt have many gay people around me in my personal life (actually I did but didnāt know it at the time because most of them were school friends who were also in the closet for the same reasons as me). We all have different upbringings, and mine involved a very religious upbringing where I was constantly told about all these sinful thoughts and actions that could send me to hell. It took a lot to undo all of that.Ā Iām still not out in real life because Iām terrified my parents will cut me off if they find out, and Iām waiting until Iām more financially independent.
Iād appreciate it if you would reblog this @crestholder (I canāt tag you for some reason but I hope you see this in your notifications). Whether it was your intention or not, you sharing this tweet out of context results in me continually being harassed and itās very upsetting. I just want people to know the full tweet thread and my thought process before they decide to judge me.
Now here are the rest of my tweets on this.
Finding out Ian McKellen is gay went a surprisingly long way to making me stop being homophobic. You canāt control what it is that gives you an epiphany.
iām really glad OP and all the people reblogging this without the commentary were just born having the correct opinions and never had to go through any struggles with their beliefs and if they did it was all very serious and they came to their conclusions in Approved ways and nothing about it was awkward or quote unquote cringey
Getting so invested in RENT made me actually face and process my internalized homophobia from my also very religious upbringing.
Like no obviously it wasnāt the only factor, but it was a big one. How could I enjoy this musical about so many queer people and still believe their love was a sin? So I choose, and I choose acceptance, and that led directly to me realizing six months later that I was gay myself.
Fiction can impact is if our minds and hearts are fertile ground for the ideas that fiction is presenting.
You can laugh but seeing m/m art and fandoms when I was 12 made my realisation that Iām queer so much easier later on. Much less ashamed.
If you want to be cynical know yourself out, but stop pretending youāre on a different plane of existence where internalised and enforced homophobia doesnāt exist
You canāt say that normalizing queer folk in media helps increase acceptance and then make fun of people who came to normalize and accept LGBTQ people because of media they consumed
Fanfic and fandom in general was my first exposure to seeing the lgbtq+ community portrayed in a positive light. Before then the only exposure I had to the concept was either people in school using āgayā as a slur or my religious education saying how sinful it was. Seventeen years later and I realized I was bi. ĀÆ\_(ć)_/ĀÆ
Slightly baffled by the theme in some of the early comments is that it is ONLY okay to change your mind to queer acceptance if you do it before a certain cutoff date. Learning and growing is only acceptable in children! Once you reach 25, youāre stuck with whatever you believe for the rest of your life, no takebacks!!
i WISH i started learning gay people were people from some soft adorable anime, i started learning gay people were people from Big Gay Al on South Park
Literally this is the POINT of telling these stories. Because humanizing lgbt people actually makes a huge difference when weāre so demonized that people are afraid theyāll be punished for even questioning why gay is supposedly wrong and evil in so many places
And this is gonna become way more prominent in upcoming years with the internet as prevalent as it is, the amount of queer media thatās being put out, and the isolation tactics by homophobes to prevent people from accessing that media. Even if people in these environments personally know gay people, there are active efforts to criminalize them having any exposure to or awareness of that side of the people they personally know. Youāre going to see young adults whose very first exposure to queer relationships are whatever show is popular when they start college or life away from their isolated upbringing.
And because of the internet, thereās a very good chance that their whole journey to self discovery will be recorded for everyone and visible forever.
These people are not the enemy. Harassing them will only confirm what theyāve been fed their whole life about the āwoke mobā who dogpile and ruin lives on a whim. There are people actively plotting to legislate us to extinction, we do not have the time to worry about people whose only crime is lack of exposure and inability to perfectly navigate the politically correct petty discourse
Weāre fighting these censorship laws because we know lgbt people have done nothing worthy of hatred, but the only way other people can know that is through exposure to who we are.
Part of that fight is accepting that weāre going to be getting adults whoāve been isolated and lied to their whole lives experiencing that exposure for the very first time
Itās up to us to
Remember why we fought for them to have that opportunity. Because getting to know lgbt people in any way, including ācringeā fiction, humanizes us
Not prove everything theyāve been taught to fear from us right by attacking them for saying the wrong thing when theyāre making any effort to reach across the aisle and learn about us despite the significant personal risk of even entertaining the thought of gay people being anything less than evil
We cannot ask people to take a leap of faith to get to know us and then plant a bed of nails for them to land on because they failed to embody the (nonexistent in reality) idealized journey to acceptance
"dni if you engage with irredeemable media! dni to kill a mockingbird stans" ok well CLEARLY you have never read to kill a mockingbird if you think it's irredeemable media and also having a book that was published in 1960 on your dni stan list is kinda ridiculous actually
i literally do not think any of you have ever read a book published before the 2000s before in your entire life
#'Dni if you've read to kill a mockingbird' what's is this the Florida banned books list #Who r u Ron DeSantis
#can somwone pleasw provide context to whatever the fuck op is referring to
No bc we been saying that this whole āno media that portrays things I donāt likeā trend is literally just evangelical censorship rebranded as being progressive. This is literally exactly wtf Ron DeSantis is up to, itās the same fucking picture.
Like putting aside the lack of absolute lack of media literacy needed to interpret To Kill a Mockingbird as irredeemably evil, it literally doesnāt matter. If you wanna flunk 10th grade English, knock yourself out. Itās when you start vilifying others for engaging with controversial subjects that youāve crossed the line into supporting the wrong side of this culture war.
And who do you think ends up as collateral damage?? Itās not Harper Lee, and itās not anyone who genuinely supports white supremacy or whatever it is you think the book condonesā¦ itās the vulnerable/marginalized populations who always inevitably end up cast as your irredeemable villains. Itās the Atticus Finchās youāre condemning for coming to the defense of the āevil violent rapistā when he investigates the nuance and broader context/implications within the narrative
(I realize maybe thatās the wrong analogy since you clearly missed the point of the book. See, Tom Robinson was falsely accused and convicted of rape not because he was genuinely guilty, but due to societal prejudices which lead the white woman and the white jury to feel vindicated and righteous blaming him on account of their belief that they were fighting against moral corruption. In fact all they were doing was upholding racism and harming an innocent man just because they had a problem with his existence. And Atticus was ostracized and branded a violent rape apologist for daring to read between the lines and see what was really happening. You, in this situation, play the part of the white woman who cried wolf)
And itās the pOoR iNnOcEnT cHiLdReN that are deprived of a rounded education and the opportunity to develop the critical thinking skills you so clearly lack
The biggest lie in fanfiction is that everyone has a first aid kit in their house. I have never owned one in my life
Wait do yāall not have likeā¦first aid boxes in your hall closets? Like just a plastic box that has your basic first aid shit?
I absolutely have one. It was one of the first things I bought when I went to live on my own.
I donāt, theyāre trash. I keep a properly stocked medicine cabinet.
I keep ace bandages, butterfly and zip stitches, gauze, disinfectant, wrist/ankle/knee braces, every kind of otc medicine you might regularly need (and prescription level lidocaine and pain meds Iāve gotten), a bite kit (w/ rattlesnake anti venom, venom extractor for snakes/wasps/etc, and potassium iodide tablets), a bug kit for ticks/mosquitoes, a few other anti venoms and poison salves, and a general trauma kit. Ofc I have stuff around the house available to address dehydration, heat stroke, and mild hypothermia. I even have a few surgical tools that Iāve used before to extract things that have punctured my skin in a minor enough way that taking it out and stopping the bleeding is enough.
To be fair tho, I do a lot of outdoor activities, Iām an idiot who gets myself injured a lot, and Iām extremely hospital avoidant, so I get pretty good use out of all that stuff. I probably wouldnāt recommend all that to people who donāt have at least a little first aid knowledge (most of mine was learned on myself as it came up, but I have also taken courses and learned stuff from working as an outdoor adventure guide/lifeguard/etc) Patching yourself up like that isnāt ideal, itās just the reality for me with my outdoor/risky lifestyle, financial situation (shoutout to privatized healthcare for this), and emotional trauma from being abused and neglected by doctors as a chronically ill afab young person. And if youāre going to be like me, you need to know when to call it and go to the hospital. Infections, secondary drowning, and internal bleeding are all things that can turn your condition quickly and quietly, so I donāt fuck around when it comes to those types of situations. I also have a pulse oximeter, thermometer, and blood pressure cuff and know what readings are out of my wheelhouse for home monitoring for me personally. And Iāve got stuff like a breathing nebulizer and as needed antibiotics at home (that were prescribed) that you get as an award once your body is fucked up enough, so I can deal with a lot of situations on my own that most people wouldnāt have the knowledge or materials/equipment for
Anyway, if my enemy showed up at my door shivering, weak, and bleeding out, I would 100% be able to sit them on the edge of the tub and gently and lovingly patch them up and nurse them back to health
I think it needs to be said cause currently I'm not seeing anybody mentioning it or providing context, but the whole 'girl dinner' meme was created by a black woman on tiktok and the joke was that within her video she's just finding a random assortment of lunch meat and crackers and shit. the joke was about like being broke and having to scrounge up a meal in the same vein as the ice soup meme. but then in typical fashion, white women stole it and co-opted, particularly the coquette dollete girl interrupted female hysteria types and mutated it into a gender essentialism ed thing. it was never meant to be about disordered eating.
alright usually i dont reply to posts like this but id like to point out nearly everything said here is straight up a lie.
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8YRQPXg/ <- this is the original girl dinner tiktok. its not a joke created by a black woman abt the struggles of being poor, its a white woman making a joke about eating little treats, and then someone plugged her silly phrase into the silly tiktok text to speech singing option.
The woman you are likely crediting for the creation of āgirl dinnerā (who DID popularize it, but she did not create it) is Karma, a teenage black girl who, from appearances, is Not Poor. take a look through her tiktok. ive been following her for a few years now, and i can tell you she has a large house and a decent amount of money. id like to say also, framing a black girl singing a silly song abt having a snack as a plight of poverty and ~the struggles of scrounging up meals~ when said girl is, not in poverty, is fucking weird as hell???
https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8YRS1m1/ heres karmas tiktok that went viral! you will see she makes No mention of this being a joke about āstruggling to eatā or āscrounging together mealsā but in fact. its just her singing the words girl dinner over repeatedly over footage of a popsicle. and in fact, IN THE FUCKING CAPTION, she notes its not her original joke.
tldr op is either giving HEAVY misinfo out of biases and the REFUSAL to check a SINGLE source, or theyre straight up lying for notes. thank you for your time. dont trust things people say on the internet
Providing a caption of Karma's tiktok:
[Id: User Karmapilled. text in description says I can't find the girl dinner persons acc but she is my hero (alt @/karma).]
i think Annamarie Forcino's video does a great job of covering the full scope of the Girl Dinner trend discourse and backstory
hey š original poster here, I will admit that I was working on misinformation here by word of mouth cause my knowledge about this came from friends as i dont be on tiktok. I will take the fall and say that this was my bad.
Back at it again putting stuff in the tags and then immediately deciding it actually needs to be in the actual post as well šš
Sorry, Iām also going to drag these two comments into this because Iāve seen a lot of this type of rhetoric on both TikTok and tumblr, so itās another thing to be consciously and deliberately aware of when critiquing online trends/their meanings and origins. We need to remember that prejudice (purposeful or not) is prejudice, even if you tack on that youāre only referring to the white queer/disabled/poor/etc people. This isnāt coming after the op specifically, because theyāre far from the only one guilty of this, but it is definitely something for anyone who finds themselves specifying that theyāre talking about the white (or cis or male or whatever) sub-sect of any demographic to really look internally as to why youāre doing that.
White people as a whole have become a very popular scapegoat in online and irl social justice discourse, and regardless of historical roles, thatās always a very dicey path to head down. Itās always easy to blame someone else for a social issue, and no demographic is immune to that urge or to being the perpetrators of shifting responsibility for their own comfort and absolvement of guilt
so we all agree that hunter volunteers at camila's vet clinic right
Friendly reminder to "outdoor cat" proponents that the common housecat (felis catus) is on the list of top 100 most dangerous invasive alien species and are listed as a worldwide threat.
Friendly reminder that the common housecat (felis catus) are credited with the extinction of at least 33 species of wildlife globally, primarily birds, small reptiles, and rodents.
Friendly reminder of all the hazards that exist out in the world including diseases, other animals, humans, cars, environmental dangers, and so on.
Friendly reminder that domesticated species are not suited to natural environments and can not support or defend themselves.
Friendly reminder that negligence is a form of animal cruelty.
Keep your cats indoors. I don't care that you think your cat is so much happier outside. I don't care that you think he's living a fuller life by being able to massacre local fauna. Either keep him inside and enrich him properly like a good pet owner, or rehome him to someone who can and never own an animal again. This is non-negotiable.
1.) Iād rather have cats keeping mouse populations under control over people leaving poison out, which is way more harmful to the environment and other animals
2.) Some places are safer for cats than others. Busy roads or places with a lot of predators are good reasons to keep your cat inside. But itās up to the individual owners to assess their circumstances and make an informed decision
3.) Letting your cats out is not inherently neglectful. Done right, itās actually safer for them. A cat thatās determined to escape WILL get out, and theyāre safer if theyāre supervised, familiar with the environment, brought in at night, know how to get back in, have the skills to fend for themselves, trained to come in when called, are wearing a tracker, etc, etc. Itās the same way teaching your kid to swim is better at preventing drowning over a lifetime than banning them from going to pools as children
4.) Same thing with vaccinating your cats, fixing them, and knowing how to patch them up. Theyāre much better off being medically prepared to be out than getting out anyway and being way more vulnerable to health threats
5.) Cats have different personalities. Some are happy exclusively indoors and would hate being outside, others are not satisfied indoors at all. Some cats are happier/healthier indoors, but others are healthier/happier with access to the outside. Itās again up to individual owners to make a decision based on the specific circumstances, not just black and white
6.) If you embrace the catās natural instincts rather than trying to suppress them, you can actually teach cats to hunt mice/rats specifically. Again, itās not about itās always right/wrong to let cats hunt, itās about being intentional with whichever choice you make
7.) Cats in homes are better than cats on the street. All the arguments youāve listed are larger threats with larger stray populations than with a well cared for cat being allowed outside in a controlled way. That cat that you advocate for re-homing despite having a home would be taking that home from another cat who needs it way more
8.) The blanket claim that all cat owners who let their cats out are unqualified is not only misleading, itās actively harmful. Itās not realistic to be all or nothing. Do you also think all farm cats should be re-homed?? Reminder that farm cats are typically feral and not determined to be good candidates to be adopted as pets, so the alternative is them being strays. Are you anti tnr too?? Itās not the perfect solution so why bother at all??
Iāve said it before and Iāll say it again, overdramatic accusations do more harm than good. Calling people abusive/neglectful for making an informed decision about their pets both waters down the impact of calling out ACTUAL abuse and negatively impacts those pet owners and their pets. Maybe find a way to actually concretely help cats (or local bird populations if thatās your bigger concern) rather than being nasty (in a naive way, no less) on tumblr
funny how dana made hunter bi, willow pan and h*ntlow canon meanwhile there is NO indication of any of that in the show lol
These tags are literally the most brain dead thing Iāve ever seen wtf. Context freaking matters jfc
One was a (transphobic) author adding random shit that was completely unrelated to or downright contradictory to the text for clout.
The other was a writer just confirming what was very obviously already there. I mean, the time skip body language, the freaking grom pic?? If you donāt think Huntlow was made canon in the show youāre being purposely obtuse. And their sexualities were also indicated in the actual show (like with the bi flag patch on hunterās diy clothes or Willow acting attracted to people of various genders, for example)
Like this isnāt even subtext, itās literally there. You have to be so media illiterate to think we didnāt see their sexualities portrayed in the show just because they didnāt directly state it. Just like how we know Raineās genderqueer even though there was never an official coming out scene. Just like how we knew Luz was bi long before her dramatic reveal. We use our brains to deduce whatās being shown rather than told (which is how information is delivered in any well written media). The fact that various methods of expressing sexuality in varying degrees of overtness were shown actually makes toh MORE accurate and MORE diverse
Youāre welcome to dislike the ship, but stop trying to act like itās genuinely problematic.
I sincerely question OPās character to be comparing a writer who fought tooth and nail to provide so much diverse, intersectional lgbt rep to the monster who actively oppresses trans people for clout. Sit in the corner and reflect on why you would make such a vile accusation over a petty shipping disagreement.
