Blizzard Wizard

[i-am-a-fish]

any deep breath enjoyers logged in right now

[i-am-a-fish]

any stretch enjoyers

[i-am-a-fish]

hello? anyone

[i-am-a-fish]

is anyone there

[blizzardwizard99]

Sorry did you say something? I was so busy stretching and listening to all of my bones crack like a glow stick

[liminalbeauty]

Holy crap.

[artphobos]

WELP, that ends my account.

[thelittlenoctua]

Qobuz is the most ethical alternative to spotify and even tidal (tidal is just pandora radio in a different font; you can't curate playlists, which i absolutely fucking hate, but you can curate playlists on qobuz, and the royalties they pay to their artists are far larger than spotify) that i've been able to find, thanks to this post on instagram by singer-songwriter laura burhenn. the post also lists other alternatives, including tidal, but qobuz is by far the best of the lot. they even have a free feature called soundiiz where you can transfer all of your playlists from spotify to qobuz!

[liminalbeauty]

Worth a reblog for this great info.

[blizzardwizard99]

What kind of car does Dracula drive?

A Chevy Impaler

[beardedmrbean]

[giliisnotcreative]

@i-like-reblog-maps I heard you like large maps ^⁠_⁠^

[i-like-reblog-maps]

what the fuck

that thing is eldritch

acquired a dark mode version just to see what it’d look like. oh my god. this map is gorgeous

i have never seen a hub that large. i’m?? stunned

[i-like-reblog-maps]

map update: it. exploded

and i got a dark mode version again, ‘cause why not

[cripple-punk-dad]

Ok so at this point I've had two people roll up to me in manual wheelchairs, well, one of them was somebody pushing somebody who was nonverbal at the time, but it still counts. They asked me why I had zip ties around my tires.

It's winter where I'm living and we have really bad snow. And the snow plow people are really bad at their jobs probably because there aren't snow plow people who clean sidewalks. As a solution I got to thinking about how I could increase the traction on my wheels. And the most redneck thing I could think of was taking a bunch of zip ties and tying them around my wheels. They last surprisingly long, and work surprisingly well. It's basically the same premise as chains for your tires during the winter.

I chose to space them out pretty evenly so there's about one for every spoke. You could probably do more or less depending on how many you want and how much traction you get but I wouldn't go more than three per spoke. I realize that it's a bit later in the winter, and I probably should have made a post about this sooner, but I came up with it about a week ago. So please share this, even if you're not disabled, because there are tons of people I know who are stuck in their houses because they can't get around in the snow. A pack of zip ties costs about $5, which compared to $200 knobby snow tires is a big save, and if you want to invest you could get colored zip ties.

[fandomshatefatpeople]

Sharing for accessibility

[catgirlwheels]

Oh fuck yes. Thank you all the abled people between op and me this is exactly what I needed to see 💜

[wishuponastarion]

ooh sweet, thanks for the tip

(for anyone using their chair both indoors and outside, highly recommend wheelchair 'slippers'/wheel socks like these so you don't tear up wood/vinyl/linoleum flooring with the zip ties!)

[stormofneurosis]

! This is fucking amazing and I love it!!!

[pukicho]

How are you straight on tumblr?

Like you've gotta at least be a little gay

It's in the requirements when you sign up

BE GAY. YOU MUST BE GAY.

[blizzardwizard99]

Everyday we stray further and further from God and closer and closer to something much much worse

[random-jot]

Brandon Sanderson sneezed on his keyboard and decided ‘screw it, yeah, that’s a character in the book now’

[totally-cis-offical]

Hey look. I’ve learned how to underline text without making it a link. Nothing happens if you click it

[i-like-reblog-maps]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Rate different bats.

…i will do it for 4 dollars

alright so, bats!

(rated by their efficacy and how satisfying they would be to fend off a home invasion)

wooden bat. solid, heavy duty, could easily be used to rattle the bones of a nighttime intruder. perfectly serviceable weapon, if a bit heavy handed. a bit lacking in pizzazz though. where’s the style? where’s the razzle dazzle? still, i could give a house burglar a concussion with this, and ultimately that is what matters. 6/10

shiny aluminum baseball bat. now we’re talking. does everything the first bat does, but makes a pleasant ringing thud when it finally comes into contact with a home intruder’s skull. that’s what sells it right there. grievous bodily harm, and grievous injury to ego. now with sound effects straight out of a roadrunner cartoon. baby go night night with a riiiiing. i hit you with this, your head starts ringing like a churchbell. 8.5/10

i changed my mind: now we’re talking. has all the bells and whistles of the aforementioned models, with the added advantage that after you kick the sucker’s ass, you get to stand over them and add insult to injury. behold evildoer, you just got your ass handed to you by the cute and unforgiving face of Hello Kitty. 10/10

lacks the razzmatazz of hello kitty, but still a perfectly usable weapon. a true classic. add some stickers & neon duct tape and we’re good to go. just be careful not to stub your toe when cleaning your room. 10/10

yes, that is a katana doubling as a baseball. yes, this is overkill. no, i’m not complaining. truly glorious. you can kick someone’s ass with a bat, and if the sucker still won’t go down? then we move on to ROUND TWO. imagine you take a few swings at an intruder, they’re looking around for a makeshift weapon, a broom handle or something, but then they look back and you’re unsheathing a second, sharper weapon. from within the same weapon. how fucked up would that be???? 11/10 probably not useful for baseball but why would you want to waste a baseball bat doing sports

much thanks to anyone who donated, i’m paying off old utility bills

TUMBLR STOP COMPLAINING, YOU ASKED FOR BATS I GAVE YOU BATS

OK OK SHEESH

BATS!!! Let’s start right off the (heh) bat, with this delightful munchkin of whom I am so personally fond, the Hammerhead Bat!!!

most precious creature in existence, I want to bop its snoot. 100/100

next up: Buettikofer’s Epauletted Fruit Bat! A type of megabat (yes that’s a thing). looks like someone stuck the head of a disgruntled greyhound on top of an itty bitty bat body. 100/100

continuing with the delightful canine theme, may I present: Bulldog Bat (100/100)

and now, the Spotted Bat! because scientists really took a look at this fucker and said “you know what its most distinguishing feature is?”

that’s right, its spots. I can’t bring myself to deduct points from this heavenly creature just because humans dropping the ball on the name. 100/100 you’re doing amazing my darling.

thankfully, biologists did a better job naming the Giant Golden-Crowned Flying Fox

Golden? sorta. Flying fox? oh sure. Giant? YUH-UP. huge fucking unit, I hope you’re having a fantastic day sweetheart, 100/100

on the opposite end of the size spectrum, we have the absolutely sensational Honduran White Bat:

blinding perfection. 100/100 I want to use them as tiny cotton balls

equally near and dear in my affections, may I present: the Hairless Bat

Ma’am that is a naked mole rat with wings. 1000/1000

and finally, a big round of applause for the Wrinkle-Lipped Free-Tailed Bat!!!

those are just BABIES though, here is a Responsible Adult:

1000/1000 all bats are perfection incarnate

Keep reading

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

changing my url…broke the keep reading link? huh. webbed site.

Bonus of the hairless bat because I Love Them:

Bonus bonus: Buettikofer’s Epauletted Fruit Bat with its mouth full of fruit. I love you Buettikofer’s Epauletted Fruit Bat

BATS!!!!!

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

question! if a human gets simultaneously bitten by a vampire, a zombie, and a werewolf, what's the end result?

[blizzardwizard99]

They become horny

[writing-prompt-s]

It's a well known fact that holy water cannot be diluted. You sometimes wonder why the church fathers keep hiring hunters and commissioning inquisitors, instead of just dropping a few vials in the ocean and letting nature itself cleanse the planet of the supernatural.

[blizzardwizard99]

So the Catholic rule with Holy Water is that it has to be at least 50% holy water, and even if we managed to get enough water to bless the entire ocean, holy water is usually consecrated for a very specific reason, and the ocean is filled with so much waste and pollution that it really wouldn’t work for like killing vampires or any other super natural entities.

[feminismandmedia]

[image description: a tweet by user @indigenousAI saying

"fun fact: as a DV survivor i cannot register to vote because doing so makes my address public. anyone who is fleeing or hiding from an abuser is automatically disenfranchised from the political process and this is a feature, not a bug"]

[taehyungsgrowl]

I don’t know of the original poster might not be aware

but!

if you’ve been a victim of domestic violence, sexual assault, or stalking, you can enroll into the address confidentiality program (free of cost!) and be registered to vote as an absentee voter and your name and address will not be made available for the public

it is super easy to get enrolled - the application takes like 5 minutes, but it has to be with someone who is certified to do it (most likely an advocate! try going to a family justice center in your area or calling the Attorney Generals office in your area!!!!)

ALSO : 

you don’t need to have any police reports or have a protection order to qualify!!! you just have to sign stating that you’ve been a victim of one of the aforementioned crimes.

[orgy-of-nerdiness]

Links to the info for every state in the Wikipedia article:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Address_confidentiality_program

Address confidentiality program - Wikipedia

[debthedemi]

Reposting as Primaries and General Voting are coming up.

[frombraize]

[salenforu]

love those book series that are like

1st book: Hero goes on a big adventure, makes a bunch of friends, and saves the day!

Latest book: Hero copes with debilitating PTSD while growing increasingly disenchanted with the moral dubiety of the people and world around them, yet nevertheless still strives towards a heroic ideal.

[thatboreddrake]

Meanwhile the Stormlight Archive:

1st book: Hero copes with debilitating PTSD while growing increasingly disenchanted with the moral dubiety of the people and world around them, yet nevertheless still strives towards a heroic ideal.

Latest book: Hero copes with debilitating PTSD while growing increasingly disenchanted with the moral dubiety of the people and world around them, yet nevertheless still strives towards a heroic ideal.

[blizzardwizard99]

All while going on a big adventure, making a bunch of friends and saves the day

[elvis-official]

This is the only picture of me I'll ever post on this blog

[elvis-official]

Okay I'll come clean. I think the bean is actually really pretty

[john-boneman-lich-lord]

"Summon ketamine ape is a banned spell" fuck it fine whatever, I summon a normal gorilla. I summon some ketamine.